Do you think Adult should marry a CHILD under any circumstance.
We learnt that the Emir of Kano is taking a fourth wife, a 17 yr old from Adamawa. Is this morally right or is this wrong.

At 17, as long as she is not forced into the marriage, its all good. 17 is not a bad age if the husband is able to cope with her maturing brain sha.
Since emir has money, I am sure he can finance any business for her. Very unlike Yerima who likes them 13 and below.
All in all, if we want to do it legally, 17 is a minor. He of all people should lead by example. He should make it known that he is waiting for her to be of legal age before taking her to be his wife. That is how leaders lead their people.

A classmate of mine in secondary school, Amina, had twins when we were 13 in JSS 3 for another guy in another school in the area. 17 is perfectly ok if the girl is mature enough. Phoenix of Rhythm FM married Nomoreloss at 19 or so. Besides, the age of consent is 12 in Angola, and was 13 in Spain until last year, and 14 in France and Germany.

I am horrified at the two posts above mine
....in varying degrees.....
But horrified all the same

I wish there was a way to throw things at the posters, and the liker!

Common sense indicates that a girl is not matured until she is like 18 or so and that it is why this same age may have been taken as a legal age for people to engage in several things termed improper for kids.

An 18 year old girl to me is okay though not completely matured. The world should know this by now. Most of these young girls if in their right senses wouldnt want to marry anyone at that age but these decisions were made for them by their parents, the culture, society and the so called religion we "dumbly" follow.

Emir is educated and he should have waited for a year... He should masturbate if he is tired of his three former wives. Didnt mean that.

Thats my take anyway.

Why can't he wait just one more year. Time flies and in one year she will be legally able to marry.
Anyway those northern elders are law unto themselves. I blame the women who let their daughters be given out at such early age.

NO

They either wait till they are off age or marry their mates

milychocs:
I am horrified at the two posts above mine
....in varying degrees.....
But horrified all the same

I wish there was a way to throw things at the posters, and the liker!

You're horrified? You must be new to this place.

paedophiles everywhere. Learn to ignore them.

The Internet is God's gift to psychopaths. Free expression of horrific points of view without fear of repercussion.

milychocs:
I am horrified at the two posts above mine
....in varying degrees.....
But horrified all the same

I wish there was a way to throw things at the posters, and the liker!

He just stated facts. Why are your horrified?

NO!

I believe that it is wrong to marry so early.

First of all, teenagers at the age of 17 should go to school and educate themselves instead of marrying and having kids. Education and some experience first!

Secondly, a young person is still forming his or her personality at a young age and will probably change a lot in the following years. The personality changes that occur later in life are not as hefty as they are when someone is young. Therefore, the decision that a person makes at 17 will very likely not be the decision that the same person would make later but it's a decision for life.

I read somewhere that in the USA the people who marry when they are still quite young are more likely to get a divorce.

Thirdly, how old is a man who marries a fourth wife? Is he so old that he could be the girl's father? For me any age difference that is so big that one of the two people involved could be the other's father or mother is somehow pervert. Imagine a man sleeping with his daughter's age mate.

Fourthly, a man who marries a girl of that he could be the father, will leave back quite a young widow and young kids. This is somewhat selfish and very often irresponsible.

Minors are not for marriage, either to adults or other minors.

They are called MINORS for a reason though I'm sure that term will soon change. Marriage is for the mature minded not those who don't even know who they are yet or what they really want out of life.

Op, where do u learned it from?

In the US, 18 is the age a girl can get married but she can also get married at 16 with parental consent

The age of marriage in USA varies by State, but is generally 18. There are, however, two exceptions - Nebraska (19) and Mississippi (21). Most states, however, allow minors below 18 to marry (generally they have to be at least 16 but sometimes lower) with parental and/or judicial consent. Some states allow female minors below 18 to marry without parental or judicial consent, if she is pregnant.

Alabama: 18, 16 with parental consent.[1]
Alaska: 18, 16 with parental consent.[2]
Arizona: 18, 16 with parental consent, no minimum with approval of a superior court judge and parental consent.[3]
Arkansas: 18, 16 for females and 17 for males with parental consent.[2]
California: 18, no minimum with approval of a superior court judge and parental consent.[4]
Colorado: 18, 16 with parental consent, no minimum with judicial approval and parental consent.[2][5][6]
Connecticut: 18, 16 with judicial & parental consent
District of Columbia: 18, 16 with parental consent.[2]
Delaware: 18, 16 for females with parental consent, 17 for males with parental consent.[2]
Florida: 18, 16 with parental consent.[2]
Georgia: 18, 15 with parental consent, 16 without parental consent if pregnant.[2]
Hawaii: 18, 15 with parental consent.[2]
Idaho: 18, 16 with parental consent.[2]
Illinois: 18, 16 with parental consent.[2]
Indiana: 18, 17 with parental consent, 15 in the case of pregnancy with both parental and judicial consent.[7]
Iowa: 18, 16 with parental consent.[2]
Kansas: 18, 16 with parental consent.[2]
Kentucky: 18, 16 with parental consent.[2]
Louisiana: 18, 16 with parental consent.[2]
Maine: 18, 16 with parental consent.[2]
Massachusetts: 18 for first marriage, 14 (male) 12 (female) with parental and judicial consent.[2]
Maryland: 18, 16 with parental consent.[2]
Michigan: 18, 16 with parental consent, 15 and under with parental consent and probate judge approval.
Minnesota: 18, 16 with parental consent.[2]
Mississippi: 21, no minimum with parental and judicial consent, but in practice the limit is 17 for men and 15 for women with parental consent.[8]
Missouri: 18, 15 with parental consent.[2]
Montana: 18, 16 with parental consent.[2]
Nebraska: 19, 17 with parental consent.[2]
Nevada: 18, 16 with parental consent.[2]
New Hampshire: 18, 14 for males and 13 for females, in cases of "special cause" with parental consent and court permission.
New Jersey: 18, 16 with parental consent and in the case of pregnancy.
New Mexico: 18, 16 with parental consent.[2]
New York: 18, 16 with parental consent, 14 with parental and judicial consent.[9]
North Carolina: 18, 16 with parental consent, unlimited in case of pregnancy or birth of child with parental consent.
North Dakota: 18, 16 with parental consent.[2]
Ohio: 18 generally as age of majority, but 16 for females with parental consent [10]
Oklahoma: 18, 16 with parental consent.[2]
Oregon: 18, 17 with parental consent. The consenting parent or guardian must accompany the applicant when applying for the marriage license.
Pennsylvania: 18, 16 with parental consent, 14 in case of pregnancy and with the approval of a Judge of the Orphans Court.
Rhode Island: 18, 16 for females with parental consent.[2]
South Carolina: 18, 16 with parental consent.[2]
South Dakota: 18, 16 with parental consent.[2]
Tennessee: 18, 16 with parental consent.[2]
Texas: 18, 16 with parental or judicial consent [11]
Utah: 18, 16 with parental consent, 15 with court approval and parental consent.[12]
Vermont: 18, 16 with parental consent.[2]
Virginia: 18, 16 with parental consent.[13]
Washington: 18, 17 with parental consent.[2] May be waived by superior court judge.[14]
West Virginia: 18, 16 with parental consent, under 16 (unspecified limit) with parental and judicial consent[2][15]
Wisconsin: 18, 16 with parental consent.[2]
Wyoming: 18, 16 with parental consent.[2]


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Age_of_marriage_in_United_States_of_America

=============================================================

At the age of 23, Obama Sr. had come to Hawaii to pursue his education, leaving behind a pregnant wife and infant son in his home town of Nyang’oma Kogelo in Kenya. Dunham and Obama Sr. were married on the Hawaiian island of Maui on February 2, 1961, despite parental opposition from both families.[7][22] Dunham was three months pregnant.[7][17] Obama Sr. eventually informed Dunham about his first marriage in Kenya but claimed he was divorced. Years later, she would discover this was false.[21] Obama Sr.'s first wife, Kezia, later said she had granted her consent for him to marry a second wife, in keeping with Luo customs.[23]

On August 4, 1961, at the age of 18, Dunham gave birth to her first child, Barack Obama II

Thats the mother of Barack Obama

@Raumdeuter

Your point is??

carefreewannabe:
@Raumdeuter
Your point is??

My point is that in many part of the world, even in the developed countries girls under 18 get married with parental consent.

raumdeuter:


My point is that in many part of the world, even in the developed countries girls under 18 get married with parental consent.

I know but in many of these countries very rarely. Anyway, does it make it right? Is it advisable?

carefreewannabe:


I know but in many of these countries very rarely. Anyway, does it make it right? Is it advisable?

Who decides what is right and what is wrong? Isnt it the law of the society?

What is right is dependent on the society you grow up in. In some societies its perfectly right to marry 4 wives, In some its right for 2 men to marry, In some its right to behead criminals, In some its perfectly right to do abortion, In some its perfectly right to smoke weed, 200yrs ago its perfectly right to kill twins and anyone who doesnt kill twins is the abnormal person. What is right to you might be wrong to others

I cant impose my personal views on anyone as long as we have the laws that govern the society

raumdeuter:


Who decides what is right and what is wrong?

Very good question.

Isnt it the law of the society?

No, it isn't. In Nazi Germany it was perfectly ok to kill Jews, was it right? NO!

In the past, many people believed that twins must be killed and it was generally accepted in some parts of Africa. Was it right? NO!

In the North of Nigeria, men marry and impregnate little girls whose bosom has not full developed. Is it right? NO!

Therefore, to me anything that hurts other human beings is WRONG!

Regarding the topic, I don't believe that a 17-year-old girl wishes to be married to a much older guy as a fourth wife. I am sure that most, if not all, of these girls do so because they are forced to with poverty being the driving force.

I am yet to see a girl from a developed country who wants to get married at the age of 17 to a guy much older and whose marriage lasts.

What is right is dependent on the society you grow up in.

If you follow tradition and cultural customs blindly, it may seem right to you, that doesn't mean that it actually is. See examples above.

In some societies its perfectly right to marry 4 wives, In some its right for 2 men to marry, In some its right to behead criminals, In some its perfectly right to do abortion, In some its perfectly right to smoke weed, 200yrs ago its perfectly right to kill twins and anyone who doesnt kill twins is the abnormal person. What is right to you might be wrong to others

Just because people consider(ed) some of these practices normal, does not mean that they were or are right. The example of twin killings is the best example to show how wrong mainstream opinion can be.

I cant impose my personal views on anyone as long as we have the laws that govern the society

No, you can't but you are free to have your opinion and you can try to shape the mainstream views or would you say that everybody has to respect everything in the name of law no matter how barbaric it is?

In Biblical times the people were ordered to go to war and kill everyone no sparing anyone, the failure to kill everyone was punished heavily by God. It was right to do at that time wasnt it?

If the killing of twins is wrong, Is abortion right? Or what is the diference between both? Yet abortion is legalised in some countries.

Who decides what age a girl is fit for marriage? some Western societies have it as low as 14. I have met girls who were given into marriage in the west at the age of 16 and 17 yet no one is chasing them.

Many of our grand parents got married as teenagers and didnt divorce

Marriage lasting or crashing has nothing to do with age. Go to divorce courts and see women who married at 30's divorcing at will

The people/society you grow up with form your thoughts, Much learned people would defend practices you would condemn It only depends on your perspective in life.

milychocs:
I am horrified at the two posts above mine
....in varying degrees.....
But horrified all the same

I wish there was a way to throw things at the posters, and the liker!

I just stabbed you in the left eyeball with a rusty knife. I expect you to die before dawn. RIP in advance.

Its usually not advisable but if both get married willingly then i guess its okay.

raumdeuter:
In Biblical times the people were ordered to go to war and kill everyone no sparing anyone, the failure to kill everyone was punished heavily by God. It was right to do at that time wasnt it?

No matter who says so and no matter where it is written, it was wrong.

If the killing of twins is wrong, Is abortion right? Or what is the diference between both? Yet abortion is legalised in some countries.

The difference between both is that the child has not yet seen the light of the world and that at the early stages of the pregnancy it has not yet fully developed the form and functions of a human being that can live outside the womb. These are just two of the differences that I can think of spontaneously. Whether they justify abortion is a topic for another thread. One can argue that it is justifiable or that it isn't, under some or under all circumstances.

Who decides what age a girl is fit for marriage?

I decide for myself and for my future daughters.

some Western societies have it as low as 14. I have met girls who were given into marriage in the west at the age of 16 and 17 yet no one is chasing them

I don't believe you.

Many of our grand parents got married as teenagers and didnt divorce

So?

And you wonder why some societies are so underdeveloped? How can societies flourish when people marry before they learn to read and write properly?

Marriage lasting or crashing has nothing to do with age.

Statistics in the US show that age is a factor when it comes to marriage.
Nigerian marriages tended to last longer for other reasons than age.

Go to divorce courts and see women who married at 30's divorcing at will

It is not only about divorce.
Kids / teenagers need to get educated first.

And they must be mature enough to make a decision for life.

The people/society you grow up with form your thoughts,

True but some people also know how to think outside the box instead of having a follow follow mentality.

They base their opinion on logic and some universal values, which they consider indisputable.

Much learned people would defend practices you would condemn It only depends on your perspective in life.

I doubt well educated and sane people would argue that it is right to kill twins in the name of culture.

The topic we discuss is more prone to discussions, that's why we are here.

raumdeuter:
In Biblical times the people were ordered to go to war and kill everyone no sparing anyone, the failure to kill everyone was punished heavily by God. It was right to do at that time wasnt it?

No matter who says so and no matter where it is written, it was wrong.

If the killing of twins is wrong, Is abortion right? Or what is the diference between both? Yet abortion is legalised in some countries.

The difference between both is that the child has not yet seen the light of the world and that at the early stages of the pregnancy it has not yet fully developed the form and functions of a human being that can live outside the womb. These are just two of the differences that I can think of spontaneously. Whether they justify abortion is a topic for another thread. One can argue that it is justifiable or that it isn't, under some or under all circumstances.

Who decides what age a girl is fit for marriage?

I decide for myself and for my future daughters.

some Western societies have it as low as 14. I have met girls who were given into marriage in the west at the age of 16 and 17 yet no one is chasing them

I don't believe you.

Many of our grand parents got married as teenagers and didnt divorce

So?

And you wonder why some societies are so underdeveloped? How can societies flourish when people marry before they learn to read and write properly?

Marriage lasting or crashing has nothing to do with age.

Statistics in the US show that age is a factor when it comes to marriage.
Nigerian marriages tended to last longer for other reasons than age.

Go to divorce courts and see women who married at 30's divorcing at will

It is not only about divorce.
Kids / teenagers need to get educated first.

And they must be mature enough to make a decision for life.

The people/society you grow up with form your thoughts,

True but some people also know how to think outside the box instead of having a follow follow mentality.

They base their opinion on logic and some universal values, which they consider indisputable.

Much learned people would defend practices you would condemn It only depends on your perspective in life.

I doubt well educated and sane people would argue that it is right to kill twins in the name of culture.

The topic we discuss is more prone to discussions, that's why we are here.

No. What does a minor knows about marriage and keeping a home?