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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses (126536 Views)
How Do You Deal With Spouses That Have Different Opinion About Family And Life? / Married Men And Women: Is It A Must You Take Dinner With Your Spouses? / Why We Cheat On Our Spouses – Abuja Residents (2) (3) (4)
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Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 12:52pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
mutter: Have women here not gone through worse in Nigeria? Did these women go on shooting spree like their male counterparts abroad? Please you are clearly justifying murder by constantly pointing at the women. I wonder what the views here would be if it were women doing the killing. No matter what a woman does to you, no matter how acidic her mouth is to you, you dnt commit MURDER madam!! You dnt!! stop with the justification!! 24 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 12:52pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
aisha2:Please stick to facts. The only man that would marry a younger woman in Nigeria and kick out his old wife is one who has been in the shoes of the man in this story because the environment enables it. No Nigerian man will kick out a respectful bread-winning wife. Let's not lose forthrightness in a bid to score points. If a Nigerian has been disrespected and/or feel short changed with his hag of a wife, he within his rights to get her replaced. If she wants to keep her home, she would do well rto be the submissive temperate wife. 17 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by mutter(f): 12:55pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
andromida: Why did she stay! Did Aisha mention that there are no house helps over there. Wrong- the men have been turned to house helps and are also privileged to be allowed to pay the bills. When a nurse works 16 hours, who dresses and takes the kid`s to school, does the homework etc. I know a man that works night and his wife is a nurse. He comes back early in the morning baths and takes his girls to KG and school. Goes home sleeps a few hours then picks the kid`s from school. He then does the homework and housework and when the wife comes in the evening he is off to work. The man is a nervous wreck. In this case the woman is a nice lady but till the man can`t cope. 9 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 12:58pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
mutter: But some of the men still expect that after a hard day the woman will come home and still perform her duties as is done in Africa. Failure to do so will earn her the tag of bad wife who wants to be westernised. There are case scenarios for each of the scenes we have both painted. For me the way to get back at someone who hurts you is not by murdering them 10 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by mutter(f): 1:03pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
Sophyrocks: Well women are doing it and have been doing it. All the men that dies mysterious deaths in Nigeria. I wonder how many were poisoned? Women kill their husbands and even their children sometimes. It does happen. Look in certain parts of Nigeria, they take these children to spiritual churches and claim they are evil and witches and get the children tortured and even killed. Women that throw away their babies. This is not a "man thing". 23 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by mutter(f): 1:07pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
aisha2: Aisha please, the woman was married to perform the duties of a wife. To submit and love her husband, take care of his home and family. They live in a system where you have to consider if the pay you get is worth employing a nanny or paying for child care. It is the duty of the woman to cook and do the house work and she can thank God when she has a man who helps her. Why leave your duty to do something else? First cope with your assigned duties before venturing into others. The main issue here is that the man and kid`s are suffering neglect and the woman is sending the money home to her family or building her own empire in Nigeria. Is that what the man married her for? 19 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by 5minsmadness: 1:08pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
aisha2: Modified. Never mind. Wait... I cant believe you said this. 6 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by pickabeau1: 1:08pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
aisha2: Ok. Since to you its justification I am not responsible for your interpretation 1 Like |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by coogar: 1:09pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
mutter: spot on! men are more victims of crimes of passion than women can ever be in nigeria. yes, women don't go on a shooting spree in Nigeria and men do not either. guns aren't that easily accessible. nigerian women are mostly passive aggressive. slow poison, delayed poison, metaphysical powers, witchery, etc are some of the weapons women use in nigeria to ruin their spouses. 12 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 1:12pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
mutter: So should a man murder his wife for doing this? Or in your words should a " provoked" man kill his wife? simple yes or no would do please 5 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 1:15pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
aisha2: @ the bolded, its not just about home chores sef. These men themselves use their wives as milking factories. Why do you think these men only do menial jobs while their younger wives work like jackal for hours? These men will go hunting for younger women so they can be easily controlled as most older men believe and so that they can control the financial benefits coming from their wives. You can see their ages up there. All of them in their 50s. Why should a man go on newspapers advertising to marry only nurses? they barely know these ladies from adam they are bringing over o. I see those adverts on nwespapers na. And you know greedy ladies, once they hear "abroad", their ears will stand like antenna! Quickly they respond and off they go with these men. Now these men think the way things are in Nigeria, will remain so in U.S. Forgeting that all those antics they pull down here, you cnt try them abroad. You will see some will just sit at home doing nothing or decide to be taxi drivers. Most of them are not educated like that but would want to marry an educated woman. They are usually not aware of how demanding the nursing jobs are. but they expect the home chores not to suffer. Before you think of bringing a woman over just for the sake of using her as a milking cow, you should consider the nature of the job and be ready to fill in the holes the job would create in the home. These men are not ready to be supportive. so what do you expect? If a man has noticed changes in his wife and she has become "Unbearable" as one of them in the Op puts it, why not divorce? Why kill? what have you gained in killing? Are these men trying to tell me other african men in the U.S also kill their wives too when provoked? Why is it only Nigeria men that are doing the killing? something is wrong with the way they reason. 15 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 1:16pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
mutter: Mysterious deaths in Nigeria is a result of a lot of things. Abuse of drug prescription self medication Neglect of ones health The tough economy Lack of coping mechanism to deal with depression etc. We should also conduct autopsy which we hardly do and even fight the lagos state government for making compulsory. So its hard to know women who killed their husbands factually while these reported cases are documented and factual not speculative. Even if they did, is it justifiable, excusable for a woman to murder a man simply because he doesn't love her anymore? 6 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 1:20pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
mutter: And how rampant is that? how many cases are they? some of them are even false reports because its very easy to point fingers at the women when the men lived horrible lifestyles that kept their health at risk. A man will die of diabetes and stroke and people in his town will say his wife killed him? How? All these cheating and maltreatment going on, why havent the women going through them killed their husbands? Abge say something else jare!! Murder can never be justified. If marriage tire you, you divorce!! Simple!! Now that these women are dead, where are the husbands now? Rottening in jail!! Thats better than divorce abi? 16 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 1:21pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
mutter: Mutter since you are so into duties, why did the man not do his own assigned duties so the wife can concentrate on her assigned duties? How do you know what the woman and her family are doing? It could be the man is angry that his slave now knows she is free,refuses to dutifully hand over her hard earned money and still be treated like shit. Why did he marry her? 16 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by 5minsmadness: 1:21pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
aisha2:Pickabeau1, if I may. Men and women are wired differently. That is pure fact. This equality bullcrap modernists keep harping on is for political correctedness, nothing more. Now a guy hustles and gathers enough pay to go abroad for greener pastures. He finally lands in America or wherever and realises he has to work his ass off and follow certain laws that were not predominant where he came from. He toils and suffers through racism and the law, condescending attitudes and whatnot until he is able to stand on his own two feet. He then brings you the woman from the same hellhole(for want of a better word,pls pardon me.) he escaped from and the woman is more than happy to come to obodoyibo with him. She accords him all the respect, is as humble as she can be and the man believes that truly he has married a gem, someone he can share his dreams and aspirations with. He brings her to his home and looks for a job for her. Then all of a sudden she realises that oga is 'just a man', 'useless' etc. She begins to talk and she never stops . All of a sudden he is not good enough. She no longer respects him and starts saying things like 'respect I earned'. Bleep her. When he struggled to bring her abroad he didn't earn the respect abi? When he made sure she passed through the law he didn't earn the respect. When he finally ensured she got the job he didn't earn the respect. All of a sudden he is a useless man and she knows if he talks too much she just has to whislte and the police will haul his ass to jail regardless of who is wrong...all of a sudden all his dreams and aspirations are meaningless and his whole existence revolves around pleasing this woman he brought from her father's ##£% of a house... A man would rather die. A man would rather die than subject himself to such nonsense. And don't say divorce is the answer cos we all know divorce most times favours the woman. All men are beasts yes. So if you are getting married to a man you should learn how to tame that beast. 20 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by pickabeau1: 1:23pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
i dont know why the women dont leave the man They still want to drain him dead, take the house, the kids and even collect settlement Guess this is what the females want everywhere No wonder marriage is dying 5minsmadness: 6 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by pickabeau1: 1:26pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
aisha2 brought up this angle which has brought others running along with a point they dont even understand It is not justifiable to murder anyone However humans are unpredictable Some will move on and rebuild their lives Others will strike back Humans for you If you see it as justification .. its OK I dont Simple 8 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 1:26pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
Sophyrocks:Actually, it would seem a better deal considering the wife gets to have anything she wants, the house and children inclusive. It really isn't a shock to see a man deprive both himself and the ex of all that rather than have only himself left in the cold. There's really not much difference between a man in jail and a free one who's alienated from kids he has to work for or go to jail, not like he sees them when he wants. At least, this biitch is dead and he's in jail. Hahahahah. He probably knew he wouldn't be able to pay alimony and upkeep for his kids, so why not just embrace the inevitable with equanimity? 6 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 1:27pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
5minsmadness: All men are not beasts. I say this respectfully ; speak for yourself. If you consider yourself one please don't make out other men to be like you. Its something you should work on personally and not attempt to draw other men into this road with you.. My father is not a beast My brothers and cousins are no beast My husband is no beast My sisters are not married to beasts So from these men I know,met and respect daily I stand to say No all men are not beasts and Pickabeau you chose to speak for will certainly agree that men are no beast. At least I have interacted with him and he is no beast, he is a kind hard working charitable man not a beast 12 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by pickabeau1: 1:27pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
Timbuktou: This is it in plain cold words When you are pushing that man to the pit, you think he wont be tempted to drag you in 10 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by pickabeau1: 1:29pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
Thanks for the kind words Once again, its not about men are beasts Its about the threshold or breaking point. Until a man gets there, you cant know what he is fully capable of No one is justifying murder aisha2: 3 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by coogar: 1:30pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
pickabeau1: most of these men would rather go to jail than let the wicked wife have the house, kids & half of his assets. some of those naija men in the article called the police themselves and handed themselves in. they are prepared to die in jail than let the wife walk away with their assets. 8 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 1:30pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
pickabeau1: I didn't bring about any angle, someone murdered someone. Now what is expected is condemnation a life has been taken not to say " ehnnn the murdered person May have deserved having their life stuffed out because they provoked the murderer" No matter the gender of the murdered and murderer you don't take another human life because its not yours to take 7 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 1:33pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
pickabeau1: I stand by my words all men are not beasts any one male or female who kills another is the beast. Murder is not peculiar to any gender. Any man who considers himself a beast is free to do so but know you don't speak for every man while doing so. Yes people snap and get to breaking points thats why we have crimes everyday but when a crime is committed is it okay to say because so and so did this then its understandable for the criminal to commit the crime? 2 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 1:33pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
Timbuktou: You see the hypocrisy amongst y'all? The murder is better? so the kids are practically left out as orphans while he languishes in jail ba? who looks after the kids? What sort of vices will these kids be exposed to? More and more dysfunctional kids exposed to crimes. you see why reasoning illogically isnt for women alone? even men make stupid irrational decisions. And you guys will come out and castigate any woman who commits murder and accuse her of reasoning illogically. In eessence, you are saying all women here in nigeria going through all sorts of maltreatments from their husbands should kill their husbands since the bastards will be dead afterall. Nothing to lose ba? Plss if you dnt have better logical points to make, dnt bother. 14 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 1:34pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
coogar:Boom. He who hath an ear, let 6 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 1:35pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
Abeg make i go rest just one page see as I taya I wonder how my people carry on for pages lol. |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by pickabeau1: 1:37pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
aisha2: As per condemnation That is basic here this is a forum so the discussion will move on the WHAT to the why or how Ok I condemn this ignoble act The next statement is What can be done to avoid the reoccurrence of this dastardly act If it was condemnation only, the thread will have died since 4 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by Nobody: 1:37pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
So in other words, all nigerian men are beasts since they are the ones killing their wives. Other african men over there are not killing their wives o. Only Nigerians!! What a shame!! See murderers on this thread! ![]() ![]() 13 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by 5minsmadness: 1:40pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
aisha2:I hear you. When I said all men are beasts I was being allegorical(I hope I got that right). Its a common slang among the women folk so I was using it to pass across my point. 5 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by pickabeau1: 1:40pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
aisha2: I agree Violence is not gender specific I am not responsible for your actions or your reaction but my actions However for me i will not push anybody to breaking point because I can 2 Likes |
Re: Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses by coogar: 1:44pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
Timbuktou: and the ones who are scared of prison life go the whole 9 yards to kill the wife, the kids and themselves. they would rather be a dead man than let an obnoxious greedy wife walk away with their assets. |
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