carefreewannabe:


Not all. Some of them live with women and even have kids with them but decide not to get married.

Ah...like my friend cr7
He lived with Irina for a while and has moved on
He even had His kid via a surrogate

No one will chop his money via the marriage backdoor....lol

carefreewannabe:


Not all. Some of them live with women and even have kids with them but decide not to get married.

For the record, cohabitation is regarded as marriage in Nigeria. I can't tell how legal or not, though.

raumdeuter:


The one with most asset gives

husband is richer, the wife cheats they get divorced, the asset which is more or less the richer spouses would be split into two

E.g If Mikels wife cheats on him and they file for divorce, The family asset would be split into two and its obvious the one with more financial investment(Mikel) would be the loser while the wife cleans even after the infidelity and vice versa if it was the wife who is richer

If they have children, then the woman would be granted custody and stay in the house while the husband has to find his way

Well, since some women are richer than their husbands, i'll say the system's not biased.

Timbuktou:
For the record, cohabitation is regarded as marriage in Nigeria. I can't tell how legal or not, though.

Cohabitation for some years is termed in law as common law marriage and binding

Timbuktou:
For the record, cohabitation is regarded as marriage in Nigeria. I can't tell how legal or not, though.

I don't think everyone sees it this way.

damiso:
Sensationalism at its best...For every one man that snaps (yeah snaps cos that's not normal behaviour.i agree though that some people are mentally unstable and can't cope when dealt with hurtful blows) and kills his wife and makes his children orphans effectively there are 20 that move on. Of course we will get to hear of those that snap cos bad news travels faster.

Besides i don't even think it's aNigerian man or Nigerian thing (every community has its idiosyncracies so maybe the Nigerian issue is the wife growing 'wings' or not showing respect) I think its just people snapping and killing their spouses. I still heard on the news this week about a spanish guy (can't remember the nationality but oyinbo sha) who killed his wife and chopped her into pieces.

Thank you for a post of reason
A lot of people move on but some snap both male or female

The point is actually about wilfully pushing the partner to snap

pickabeau1:


Ah...like my friend cr7
He lived with Irina for a while and has moved on
He even had His kid via a surrogate

No one will chop his money via the marriage backdoor....lol

What makes you think that anyone wants to chop his money?

freecocoa:
Well, since some women are richer than their husbands, i'll say the system's not biased.

Most women wont marry a man they are richer than anyway so in most of this cases, the man is the richer party over 80% of the time and since the woman would still retain the house anyway of they have children.

damiso:
I still heard on the news this week about a spanish guy (can't remember the nationality but oyinbo sha) who killed his wife and chopped her into pieces.

I can bet my left eye that that guy ate amala and ewedu before he killed the woman. There has to be some link to Nigeria, he's probably been drinking pure water. Please check your facts well.

carefreewannabe:


What makes you think that anyone wants to chop his money?

Are u asking me why I think he wants to secure his assets from legal gold diggers

Do u know who cr7 is

raumdeuter:


Most women wont marry a man they are richer than anyway so in most of this cases, the man is the richer party over 80% of the time and since the woman would still retain the house anyway of they have children.

Oops!

Timbuktou:
I can bet my left eye that that guy ate amala and ewedu before he killed the woman. There has to be some link to Nigeria, he's probably been drinking pure water. Please check your facts well.

you mean that guy is a Nigerian in Spanish clothing?

raumdeuter:


Cohabitation for some years is termed in law as common law marriage and binding

Voila. There you go. Carefree, you best your cohabitation to three years or less.

carefreewannabe:


I don't think everyone sees it this way.

that's reality, though.

pickabeau1:


Do u know who cr7 is

Now why do I find this funny?

freecocoa:
Now why do I find this funny?

Why...not everyone follows football

Timbuktou:
I can bet my left eye that that guy ate amala and ewedu before he killed the woman. There has to be some link to Nigeria, he's probably been drinking pure water. Please check your facts well.

LMAO!!!!

pickabeau1:


you mean that guy is a Nigerian in Spanish clothing?

Michael Jackson style Spanish niggah. The Nigerian murderousness must surely shine through, the bleaching no reach him heart. Let them plug his brain to a monitor, speak yoruba to him and see if he doesn't understand what they say beneath his "Si, senor" .

I'm sure if they rummage through his intestines, they'd find ogufe.

mutter:


Aisha please, the woman was married to perform the duties of a wife. To submit and love her husband, take care of his home and family. They live in a system where you have to consider if the pay you get is worth employing a nanny or paying for child care.

It is the duty of the woman to cook and do the house work and she can thank God when she has a man who helps her.

Why leave your duty to do something else? First cope with your assigned duties before venturing into others.

The main issue here is that the man and kid`s are suffering neglect and the woman is sending the money home to her family or building her own empire in Nigeria.
Is that what the man married her for?

If that's the case why then must the men insist the women do their duties for them which is to provide for the family?

He married her for her wifely roles, what did she marry him for? To be a house ornament? Since he won't do his part and won't help wifey with her part.

Clear case of wanting to eat his cake and have enough to save and sell.

freecocoa:
Well, since some women are richer than their husbands, i'll say the system's not biased.

how many can you count??
this is where hypergamy comes into play. women have always played it smart from the outset. marry a rich man & kick him out after a while to take half of his belongings.

freecocoa:

Never said all men are monsters or wives saints, any man who kills his wife for not wanting to share his assets could pass for a monster though.

well, monsters are made, not born!
how did he suddenly become a monster? you take a man's house, his kids, his cars and half of his assets - what else is there to live for?

If she's the one who cheated and asked for a divorce, shouldn't the man be the one getting more? If no, then the system is indeed flawed but then again,I don't believe it's exactly the way you make it out to be.

the richer party loses half & in most cases, the man is the richer party. you really think a naija wife would initiate divorce when she is the one that would lose half of her assets? na those kind wives nice pass. even if her husband is bringing mistresses to the house, she would turn the other cheek.

That's what I'm talking about, that's how a "real" man should treat a woman, buy her car to wipe her tears, you da man .

so you like the "real" man?

Yes o, murder can be justified here biko, we are talking of a defenseless baby.

case closed then!
some of the stuff some husbands have suffered in the hands of their wives abroad is more painful than what that evil housemaid did in uganda.

Timbuktou:
Michael Jackson style Spanish niggah. The Nigerian murderousness must surely shine through, the bleaching no reach him heart. Let them plug his brain to a monitor, speak yoruba to him and see if he doesn't understand what they say beneath his "Si, senor" .

I'm sure if they rummage through his intestines, they'd find ogufe.

Bro...

Hating on naija males...

Our resident femmes' pastime...

Nne they know the truth.

That's why 60percent of them who married wives to suit their long planned out schemes will always have problems.

Sophyrocks:


@ the bolded, its not just about home chores sef. These men themselves use their wives as milking factories. Why do you think these men only do menial jobs while their younger wives work like jackal for hours? These men will go hunting for younger women so they can be easily controlled as most older men believe and so that they can control the financial benefits coming from their wives. You can see their ages up there. All of them in their 50s. Why should a man go on newspapers advertising to marry only nurses? they barely know these ladies from adam they are bringing over o. I see those adverts on nwespapers na. And you know greedy ladies, once they hear "abroad", their ears will stand like antenna! Quickly they respond and off they go with these men. Now these men think the way things are in Nigeria, will remain so in U.S. Forgeting that all those antics they pull down here, you cnt try them abroad. You will see some will just sit at home doing nothing or decide to be taxi drivers. Most of them are not educated like that but would want to marry an educated woman. They are usually not aware of how demanding the nursing jobs are. but they expect the home chores not to suffer. Before you think of bringing a woman over just for the sake of using her as a milking cow, you should consider the nature of the job and be ready to fill in the holes the job would create in the home. These men are not ready to be supportive. so what do you expect?

If a man has noticed changes in his wife and she has become "Unbearable" as one of them in the Op puts it, why not divorce? Why kill? what have you gained in killing? Are these men trying to tell me other african men in the U.S also kill their wives too when provoked? Why is it only Nigeria men that are doing the killing? something is wrong with the way they reason.

pickabeau1:



Why...not everyone follows football

Not Necessarily about that, I just imagined your face while you were typing that, and I saw how my brother who is a Ronaldo freak, would react at someone insinuating a woman could really love cr7 and not his money, you might not really get it sha.

Interesting thread

Foreign based Nigerian husbands for starters need to understand that their dictatorship styled ways do not work and there is serious need to learn or dig out the concept of mutual respect. Get out of my house collect keys style doesn't work over there.

The age difference in some of the couples are wierd could it be love? Greed? Desire to control etc etc.

One of the nurses said the husbands see their wives nursing jobs as a reason not to work again and still expect TLC when the drained wives come back home... hmmm eating cake and having it is some people's stock in trade

If every wife kills her husband when she is used or feels used in Nigeria,there will be a terrible problem.

I know there are some demonic wives amongst the nurses and other professions; nothing stops the husband from looking for effective ways to deal with her. Some travel home and divorce, others look for good lawyers who can fight his course; some set her up etc. Etc.

My point, If your wife is a demon, look for ways to deal with her. Killing is a no no

I believe that a lot of Nigerian marriages are flourishing and This ain't the norm.

Timbuktou:
Sometimes, it's enjoyable. Sometimes, it's crazy.

It's a form of entertainment to me.

Carefree, believe me when I say there is a growing number of men boycotting marriage altogether, one of the reasons being the fate of a divorced husband and father, and not because they don't like the idea of marriage.

There are more reasons why more and more people, men and women, don't want to get married.
The number one reason is PROBABLY the fact that it is no longer considered a crime, sin, stigma to live with someone without getting marriage.
The rejection of ecclesiastical dogmas is POSSIBLY the number one driving force.

Also, per your friend's aunt, what, really is the purpose of alimony? Now, we have a man who can fend for himself without a wife who's receiving money regularly from this woman. I mean, what's the point? And she can barely get by too. Come on. This is what millions of men go through. I assure you, reviewing divorce laws to cater to only real cases with curb the rate of frivolous divorces.

The man is greedy, just like many women.

Where did you get your numbers from again?

Women, statistically, initiate about 65% of divorces, many of these frivolous as hell. And they can afford the luxury because they go through the divorce on someone.

You are misinformed.
The fact that women initiate majority of the divorces is not because they can afford it or because they get rich after divorce. ([s]They do it because men suck and the marriage institution as well. Joking[/s] )
These are the stories the media uses to catch your attention and they exist but they are not representative of the majority.
In fact, single mothers, in Germany, the UK and the USA are far more likely to live in poverty than married women.

mutter:
When you have nothing to live for, then you have everything to die for!

The fact that it keeps happening shows that the men are not all suddenly going mad.

A man that had worked so hard brought his much younger wife here to Germany, when they come to church the wife was so rude to the man, perhaps because she was better educated. I quickly grabbed hold of her and drew her aside. I warned her that her husband was respected in this community and if she ever tried it again where I was I would shred her to bits. Foolish girl!

These greedy bitches accept a man they do not love and are ashamed of just to get out of Nigeria and then they want to ruin the man.
Do you know that these men have worked so hard for so many years! Received all kinds of insults from society and then you bring this young girl and she gives you the final insult to let you know you are = 0.
How many of them come here with nothing and soon the man is out of his own home on the streets and having to pay maintenance.
When the study in America, they are able to do so because the man brought them there.
Nursing is not even a good paying job, like any menial job you can gather money if you work enough hours. While they are at work they cannot perform as wife`s so of what use is the work if it does not benefit the family?

No matter how educated or how much money they have a woman must humble herself and treat her husband with the utmost respect in all situations. That is not just good for the man but also for the children. The children are raised in an environment where the learn respect and manners.
That is what you get when a man that has struggled for years gets dragged into the mud in his own home. A man that has struggled and faced discrimination and abuse outside. Treat him like a king at home so that he can feel like the man he is, that will give him the strength to keep struggling.
Instead these women get rude, function like they don`t have a family, neglect the welfare of their husbands and homes and go running after the dollars.

You are a lucky woman. I would have slapped the madness out of your head for daring to interfere in what has absolutely nothing to do with you. Tear her to shreds lol. You must have sized her up and thought she would put up with your crap. If she's as crazy as you want to paint her she would have been the one to tear your nosey ass to shreds for interfering in her marriage. If anyone needs yo check her, it should be her husband. Concentrate on your own husband and stay out of people's marriages. I'm seriously not kidding. I would have kicked you in the head for even pulling me aside and trying to talk to me about my husband. You have lost your mind

pickabeau1:


Bro...

Hating on naija males...

Our resident femmes' pastime...

Don't mind these ones abeg. Most of them, dia market done sour tey tey.

Timbuktou:
that's reality, though.

It obviously isn't. Tell me how your parents would react if your sisters lived with a man without getting married.

pickabeau1:
i dont know why the women dont leave the man
They still want to drain him dead, take the house, the kids and even collect settlement

Guess this is what the females want everywhere

No wonder marriage is dying

actually if they do decide to leave, they will still get the house and maybe the kids too. So them not leaving is a sign that they hope the marriage will work out.

It is the men who go off the handle because their slaves are not bending to their wills and then go on a shooting rampage.

pickabeau1:


Are u asking me why I think he wants to secure his assets from legal gold diggers

Do u know who cr7 is

Cristiano Ronaldo.

There is a reason why many rich men marry rich women and why rich women marry rich men; to make sure that they partners are not after their money. Let's talk about Nigerians though, Nigerian men don't mind that the young 20-year-old girl overlooks their wrinkled skin and pot-belly for money.

freecocoa:
Take the kids and go back to her father's house you say, now I think you are just being funny.

How is it possible that she told lies against him and the law just swallowed it, giving her all he has? Who is to say she didn't invest anything financially in the marriage? From the OP, it's clear these women work their black nyashes off everyday, so what are you talking about? Are you saying she should leave with nothing to take care of her kids with? So the only way to strike back if he feels he's been cheated is murder?

Coogar what have you eaten today?

on the average,women in the US work harder than the man. Proven fact.
Even academically they've surpassed the men.

I'm still confused when I come to nairaland and read sentences like 'all he labored for'
They think it is Nigeria where the women's achievement are swept under the carpet and Made to look like it was all the man's effort.

That's why you will see a Nigerian couple who both work and contribute equally to the home still refer to the family home as the man's house.

These naija bros here are pained they can't get away with such. That's why they go gaga and start shooting when they can't have their way like they would if they were in naija.

soulglo:



You are a lucky woman. I would have slapped the madness out of your head for daring to interfere in what has absolutely nothing to do with you. Tear her to shreds lol. You must have sized her up and thought she would put up with your crap. If she's as crazy as you want to paint her she would have been the one to tear your nosey ass to shreds for interfering in her marriage. If anyone needs yo check her, it should be her husband. Concentrate on your own husband and stay out of people's marriages. I'm seriously not kidding. I would have kicked you in the head for even pulling me aside and trying to talk to me about my husband. You have lost your mind

I love it.