first of all, I hope I'm posting this on d right section...


Mikel is going to change to light...

older colleague: Mikel! stop. killjoy go n change to light
killjoy: Bt y? shey Mikel is going to do just dat?
older colleague: don't question me. just do as I say...
killjoy: y even d person paying my salary accords me some respect. if u Dnt tell me y Mikel who is going to change to light shud stop n I shud go n do it, den I won't do it
older colleague: look killjoy, u Dnt want to me to have problem with u in dis office. just go n change to light...



.... for God sake Hw can one stop dis kinda harrasment at work? I hv taken as much as I intend to n am about to snap, yet I Dnt want to hv a row at work... someone plz advice me

Na wa for some colleagues sha. Giving orders as if they are in their family house.

OP, take heart ehn. Hope no be say na State Ministry you dey work? I don't know what entails your company's policy as per employee-to-employee relations but such nonsense shouldn't be condoned in a professional environment.

If na me, I kuku get agidi before. I go just do like say I no hear the 'older colleague', and if he tries to take it further, I call him out. Yes ke, no time for bullshi.t.

Life is tough already, wouldn't want any colleague to worsen it.

Btw, it's not in the right section. This should preferably be at the 'Career' section. But people here would benefit from this discussion more I think.

I only get bossed by my superiors at work. I don't take it from colleagues.

sholay2011:
Na wa for some colleagues sha. Giving orders as if they are in their family house.

OP, take heart ehn. Hope no be say na State Ministry you dey work? I don't know what entails your company's policy as per employee-to-employee relations but such nonsense shouldn't be condoned in a professional environment.

If na me, I kuku get agidi before. I go just do like say I no hear the 'older colleague', and if he tries to take it further, I call him out. Yes ke, no time for bullshi.t.

Life is tough already, wouldn't want any colleague to worsen it.

Btw, it's not in the right section. This should preferably be at the 'Career' section. But people here would benefit from this discussion more I think.

its a private organisation. der is just d boss n d workers. we hv our difrent depts n roles... superiority is kinda based on who has worked in d firm d longest. Bt even d boss says plz wen he makes a request from his workers. so y wud one fellow start forming boss wen I Dnt work for him. its frustrating

starlingbawa:
I only get bossed by my superiors at work. I don't take it from colleagues.

wot if seniority is based on who has been in d firm d longest nt necessarily who works more

killjoy:


wot if seniority is based on who has been in d firm d longest nt necessarily who works more

You could have a point there. It's never happened to me though. My colleagues don't boss me around. That ain't happening anytime soon!

starlingbawa:


You could have a point there. It's never happened to me though. My colleagues don't boss me around. That ain't happening anytime soon!

interesting... do u work abroad?

killjoy:


its a private organisation. der is just d boss n d workers. we hv our difrent depts n roles... superiority is kinda based on who has worked in d firm d longest. Bt even d boss says plz wen he makes a request from his workers. so y wud one fellow start forming boss wen I Dnt work for him. its frustrating

Hmmm...I get. I understand the setting and that kinda 'superiority' is awkward to begin with.

But the older colleague in question has attitude problems, regardless of the company's policy on superiority. Shebi no be only him dey dia? He certainly lacks the belief that we are to basically respect one other as colleagues, regardless of age or length of stay, and any other 'errand' is a form of favour so far it's not stated as part of the job description. And that favour is EARNED, not DEMANDED. And when it's demanded, it's done with respect.

OP, I believe you know the way that works best for you to manage people with such nasty attitudes and backdated ideologies. Just see this as one of them.

If na me, I go ignore the man anytime he demands such 'favours' without any sense of 'respect'. Wisdom though should be applied in handling this type of people. They soon become the victim of a rude, uncouth, 'Johnny-just-come employee' while you soon turn to the bad person in the process of putting him in his place.

Everyone on NL would only tell you how they would handle the imaginary situation. I believe you know the man better. Ask for divine wisdom to handle or rather, manage him. What doesn't break you simply makes you stronger.

Hmmmm!! Interesting.. From my view I tink he feels threatened by u.. Either by your looks(asin more handsome)lol! Or by the way u do ur job(possibly u dot ur I n cross T) or maybe he notices ur boss is taking a liking to u over a lotta others that hav been there before you.. It may be for multiple of other reasons but either way he is threatened by you..
My suggestion is u use psycology to get by... "Find out his temperament and blend in"..
Someone once said something where I once worked. He said and I quote "U don't have to be friends to work together but if we are, the better".. So u don't have to b friends ,just try finding out his temperament and u wud see how predictable his actions are n dat way u can get around ur job wihout havin him gettin on ur nerves

killjoy:


interesting... do u work abroad?

No, I work for SHELL OIL and GAS. Now, you understand?

starlingbawa:


No, I work for SHELL OIL and GAS. Now, you understand?

*Scratches head*
Oga Starlingbawa, how far naa? You no know me? Well, I know you oo. When should I send you my CV abeg?








I'm serious oo.

sholay2011:

Hmmm...I get. I understand the setting and that kinda 'superiority' is awkward to begin with.

But the older colleague in question has attitude problems, regardless of the company's policy on superiority. Shebi no be only him dey dia? He certainly lacks the belief that we are to basically respect one other as colleagues, regardless of age or length of stay, and any other 'errand' is a form of favour so far it's not stated as part of the job description. And that favour is EARNED, not DEMANDED. And when it's demanded, it's done with respect.

OP, I believe you know the way that works best for you to manage people with such nasty attitudes and backdated ideologies. Just see this as one of them.

If na me, I go ignore the man anytime he demands such 'favours' without any sense of 'respect'. Wisdom though should be applied in handling this type of people. They soon become the victim of a rude, uncouth, 'Johnny-just-come employee' while you soon turn to the bad person in the process of putting him in his place.

Everyone on NL would only tell you how they would handle the imaginary situation. I believe you know the man better. Ask for divine wisdom to handle or rather, manage him. What doesn't break you simply makes you stronger.

truth is I've been putting up wit him Bt yestdays harassment just got to its limit. he was litetarily yelling at me... I even tot our boss wud summon us... maybe next tym its about to repeat itself, I'd just run n hide sumwer

upload111:
Hmmmm!! Interesting.. From my view I tink he feels threatened by u.. Either by your looks(asin more handsome)lol! Or by the way u do ur job(possibly u dot ur I n cross T) or maybe he notices ur boss is taking a liking to u over a lotta others that hav been there before you.. It may be for multiple of other reasons but either way he is threatened by you..
My suggestion is u use psycology to get by... "Find out his temperament and blend in"..
Someone once said something where I once worked. He said and I quote "U don't have to be friends to work together but if we are, the better".. So u don't have to b friends ,just try finding out his temperament and u wud see how predictable his actions are n dat way u can get around ur job wihout havin him gettin on ur nerves

u knw I also suspected he feels threatened by me ( I'm handsome n best at my job. lol...) Bt im finding it hard understanding his temperament. one minute we r old buddies laffing n convasing , next minute, he assumes a stern countenance n starts dis boss-slave relationship. it just stunns me

starlingbawa:


No, I work for SHELL OIL and GAS. Now, you understand?

ooohhhhhh... cooll... at least job description n superiority is specific. nonetheless, I hv heard hw oil workers beef demselves... hw u holding up?

sholay2011:

*Scratches head*
Oga Starlingbawa, how far naa? You no know me? Well, I know you oo. When should I send you my CV abeg?








I'm serious oo.

lolzzzzz... lyk seriously me sef go forward my own cv

killjoy:


truth is I've been putting up wit him Bt yestdays harassment just got to its limit. he was litetarily yelling at me... I even tot our boss wud summon us... maybe next tym its about to repeat itself, I'd just run n hide sumwer

He was yelling at you ke? Eh eh...that man get craze oo.

Your boss sef no try; he should have summoned both of you to correct this about-to-be-sour interaction. Yelling in an office environment should be a no-no, especially if it's based on personal vendetta. I pray for more grace for you to handle this kain man sha.

Our poster from Shell should chip in too.

killjoy:



lolzzzzz... lyk seriously me sef go forward my own cv

Abeg, no attachment for this kind thing. Let him first get mine before you bother him again with yours.




I can see Shell in my future. ..not Snail shell oo

sholay2011:

He was yelling at you ke? Eh eh...that man get craze oo.

Your boss sef no try; he should have summoned both of you to correct this about-to-be-sour interaction. Yelling in an office environment should be a no-no, especially if it's based on personal vendetta. I pray for more grace for you to handle this kain man sha.

Our poster from Shell should chip in too.

amen o. tnx

sholay2011:

Abeg, no attachment for this kind thing. Let him first get mine before you bother him again with yours.




I can see Shell in my future. ..not Snail shell oo

lol dnt be shell-fish na... he can attend to both of us at dsame tym

kill dem

Donpoker9:
kill dem

oh tnx. skipped my mind. noted

killjoy:


oh tnx. skipped my mind. noted

uwcm

If your colleague is a man, then go after his wife and if he's a woman, go after her husband. Believe me, he/she won't dare you anymore till he leaves the company.

killjoy:


oh tnx. skipped my mind. noted

Lol

Donpoker9:

uwcm

Eh eh...una don craze

KHAYGOLD:
If your colleague is a man, then go after his wife and if he's a woman, go after her husband. Believe me, he/she won't dare you anymore till he leaves the company.

hehehehe... u will make an excellent therapist. wot if d colleague happens to be a young man who is single n nt dating?

sholay2011:

Lol


Eh eh...una don craze

lolzzzzzzz. an adage says to follow craze man, u must be a craze man

I don't understand.

Don't you have an office assistant that ought to take care of tasks like that?

Also, you need to CUT OFF the overly friendliness and familiarization with the "oldie". He is being a bully and that is unacceptable! Let the ONLY thing that brings in contact with him be work. Don't so much as crack a smile at his jokes, be stern and very official with him. But, please make sure you are really good at your job.

If he yells at you, stay calm and tell him whilst staring directly in his eye, " Mr...this is an official environment, please conduct yourself in a civil manner". Then ignore him! Don't EVER reduce yourself to arguing with him and don't you dare yield to his bully by running, cowering or showing fear.

The next time he pulls a silly stunt like that, tell him calmly, l am really busy at the moment, then ignore him. Let's see if he will lay a finger on you.

Evina:
I don't understand.

Don't you have an office assistant that ought to take care of tasks like that?

Also, you need to CUT OFF the overly friendliness and familiarization with the "oldie". He is being a bully and that is unacceptable! Let the ONLY thing that brings in contact with him be work. Don't so much as crack a smile at his jokes, be stern and very official with him. But, please make sure you are really good at your job.

If he yells at you, stay calm and tell him whilst staring directly in his eye, " Mr...this is an official environment, please conduct yourself in a civil manner". Then ignore him! Don't EVER reduce yourself to arguing with him and don't you dare yield to his bully by running, cowering or showing fear.

The next time he pulls a silly stunt like that, tell him calmly, l am really busy at the moment, then ignore him. Let's see if he will lay a finger on you.

waw... for a gal u r hard! kudos. afta d row he didn't tok to me thru out dat day Bt we're to kin nw. tnx for ur advice wud try them out, Bt slowly n steadily

I was having same problem, I gave it to them like they wanted it. I didn't take sh1t from them cos the moment I start taking it, it will be difficult to start refusing it.

I show them better stubbornness when I know I am on my right, I even tell them to go report to the boss if they like.

customized13:
I was having same problem, I gave it to them like they wanted it. I didn't take sh1t from them cos the moment I start taking it, it will be difficult to start refusing it.

I show them better stubbornness when I know I am on my right, I even tell them to go report to the boss if they like.

I agree totally with the bolded. Don't start what you can't finish. ...including being 'extra nice' at the workplace.

I learnt that the hard way during my nysc at State Ministry.

killjoy:


ooohhhhhh... cooll... at least job description n superiority is specific. nonetheless, I hv heard hw oil workers beef demselves... hw u holding up?

The organisation is top notch in the multinational oil companies. It's cool because it's run by great foreigners. The guy next to you in the office could by an American while the one on your left a dutch.

So, you see the atmosphere is great. I don't experience the negativity the OP is highlighting.

Cheers!!!

Killjoy! Killjoy!! Killjoy!!! How may times I call you
You too dey advertise close up for that office
1.He's your colleque -not superior
2.You do your job well-your advantage
3. He's temperamental-hes disadvantage, even his colleques would have this reservations against him *your advantage *
4.He's older than you -you didn't contribute to his grandparism which includes late school entry, late addmission,late grad,late stay in labour mrk,late securing of job
5. He's biggger than you play the girl card(use ya mouth or he should look for his mate)
6. Are you in the good book of your boss if yes your advantage if no take a swipe against him when your boss isn't there but be sure he isn't in the good book og your boss too
Your boss never reacted becos you acted like a wimp and hey that guy is making himself the leader already
You've got 2boss just that one is your paymaster and the other your taskmaster
OR you keep silent and ENDURE, your last card send mr shell your CV sharparly
The day you blast that guy be ready to stand ALONE
No dull DULLING is a FEDERAL OFFENSE
Feed me your result