[quote author=Yields post=31135097]
WHY? Elaborate, k,

usermane:


Thanks a lot for your concern. Perhaps i may lighten my heart by confiding in someone, but even then it has to be someone really close to me, someone that can relate. This pain am suffering can cause anyone a whole lot. Thanks a lot.

Are you alright brother?

i pray from the deepest part of my soul that everyone who comes to this thread finds peace and acceptance of who they are, knowing that the power to change lies within them, knowing that they can make a difference not just to themselves but another soul who may need them more than they need themselves. I pray the find the power to overcome that voice that lists the reasons why we're unworthy of life and love, knowing that the love of God encompasses all and in his embrace can we find peace.

I pray that the Lord stretches his hand on each and everyone, taking our hurt and giving us eternal joy, leading our dominant thoughts away from the worlds hurts, touching our spirits so that we are not overcome by pain but instead made stronger by our experiences and at the end of this life, we don't leave the world with guilt and pain and unanswered questions but in the fulfillment that we gave it our best shot. Amen

[quote author=Rawdeal post=31149321]
Thanks for the encouragement

igwemoagbo:
Have been having this urge to just end my life. My story is just too lengthy. But sincerely I don't think I can hold on any more. My heart is heavy and totally depressed. Of many issues, work depressions, home, I have failed virtually.cos I can't even live up to the title "first born anymore."I work and it's like I don't work at all..The organisation I work with deprived me of all my entitlements..despite the fact I have payed dearly(financial settlements) for certain losses that affected the co.wen I was a supervisor I don't know what to ask from God any more. My fiancee has asked when can we get married., I have been given quit notice to vacate the apartment I live Inn .God are you up there? All this is way too much for me @30 years to worry about....

A wise man once told me this... "why worry over something you have no control over?" Whatever situation you are in, always remember that you're not the first person to go through such and definitely won't be the last... No matter how terrible the situation looks, always remind yourself that it'll pass... Tears might last thru the night but joy surely comes in the morning. Behind the clouds, the sun shines.... If you're moody over ur own predicament, you'll surely thank God if you hear other people's story...

You complain of work depression , there are several graduates out there who have searched every nook for employment to no avail...

You complain about not being able to live up to the "first born" title, I know several folks who grew up without a family, they're willing to pay with their sweat just to have someone love them...

You were given a quit notice, how would u feel if I told you that there exist some folks who have never slept on a mattress their entire life...

As regards ur fiancée, she needs to be your pillar thru this trying times....

My brother, worrying over your issues changes nothing, it only adds up to ur problems... Laugh over your troubles, live everyday like it's the last, smile more worry less... You'll live to tell the story. Always remember, every great man on earth surely has a story to tell!!!

ken2020:
my life is just in a big mess right now and I just can't find a reason to continue living. After my Nysc , life was so miserable for me due to my jobless state. Out of the love my parents have for me , they sacrificed all their life savings to help me start a business, they believed so much in me that was why they sacrificed all their savings despite the fact that I still have sibbling who also need money. They were hoping that I will be successful in the business and so help my younger ones. I just can't believe that am bankrupt in just 6 months of starting my business. since I started my business it has always been from one misfortune to the other. finally i got duped by some fraudsters who I believe used some charms on me to collect everything I have , they made me sell my shop and all my few properties. Before I could come back to my senses, they were no were to be found. I deeply depressed , right now, am homeless but the worst part is that my family is not, aware of this situation. They still think am doing fine in business and I just can't face them when I go home this Xmas. I have been thinking of a way out of this situation but still, I can't come up with anything, I have offered my kidney for sale butup till now no buyer has indicated his /her interest. Right now am in serious debt and my debtors are just on my neck everyday..The shame is just too much for me to bear. I have already made up my mind to commit suicide if I don't get a buyer for my kidney before the 27th of December. I just pray my parents will find a place in dia heart to forgive me.

I hope this is not too late.... I'll advice you start afresh, you definitely missed it somewhere... Even the Bible made mention of the effects of a badly laid foundation... Work on yourself, find out where u missed it, leverage on ur mistakes....If dangote quitted at some point in his life, he wouldn't be where he is today... A one-time president of Nigeria went from being a prisoner to being a powerful ruler, if he had quitted while in prison, he would have died a prisoner... You don't have to resort to selling your kidney before you can make money... There're so many opportunities out there, if only you can open your eyes and read beyond the picture...

kripke:
the fears, doubts, uncertainties,hoplessness...the finality of death brings that one true peace.the guaranteed peace of death always brings a quick joy to my heart.cant imagine anyone will take that away from you.

Yea true, but you'll surely be judged in heaven for taking ur own life... Your life is God's and not for you to take...

I will quickly state my issue in a short text. I had planned for four years through my bsc. I am a penny pincher and was able to make well over 2 million naira. Going to serve in abj, I decided to spoil my self a little and buy a car and then sell it off at the end of my youth service. I also fed myself and got a house in abj thinking I would seek employment...but I lost half of my money for a very foolish decision to buy a car(duped by my brother who I don't talk to anymore). I am going to be 22 this year, searching endlessly for work (this link is a part of my story: https://www.nairaland.com/2181141/toxic-father-less-optimum-mother). I have decided i either go and live in the north where it would be cheap or commit suicide by 23. There are no counsellors in nigeria to help only pastors who tell you to pray...I have prayed for 21 years and am tired...I am not Job. There is no family anywhere to help, the men I ask for help want to sleepy with me, I'd rather die that do that. The man I have called father abuses i and my sis and my brother alone...he sent the others for msc, dint send us, not that am bothered but no job. My mother is too dependent on me, my sister owes me money and would rather spend it on boys, my brother from emotional abuse is useless and dosent want to work, he's waiting for someone to breast feed him. I am the only one with a plan...and now I am faced with the decision to move out with my 1 million. We done eat in the house, we don't use the cars, we have been chased out several times, for how long where is God...
www.nairaland.com/2181141/toxic-father-less-optimum-mother

Somebody should please advice me on what i can do to turn my life around. I'm 29years old and i don't have anything yet,i don't even know what i want anymore as i feel frustrated worst case scenario i still stay in my parents house nowhere to go all i do is sleep and wake up everyday doing nothing. i went to uni but i haven't gotten my certificate although i had two outstanding when i was about graduating in 2010.it really delayed me going for service even as i type now i have not yet gone for youth service as my department keep telling me they are still working on the results for senate approval.Everyone has left me behind. i wake up every morning with a heavy heart and tears sometimes i even find it hard to sleep. It's so tiresome.

Rostel2:
Somebody should please advice me on what i can do to turn my life around. I'm 29years old and i don't have anything yet,i don't even know what i want anymore as i feel frustrated worst case scenario i still stay in my parents house nowhere to go all i do is sleep and wake up everyday doing nothing. i went to uni but i haven't gotten my certificate although i had two outstanding when i was about graduating in 2010.it really delayed me going for service even as i type now i have not yet gone for youth service as my department keep telling me they are still working on the results for senate approval.Everyone has left me behind. i wake up every morning with a heavy heart and tears sometimes i even find it hard to sleep. It's so tiresome.

Count yourself amongst the lucky ones, remember there are a whole lot of people who couldn't attend school just because of financial problems, and there are some who dropped out for the same reason...

Your situation isn't as bad as u see it. From my point of view, I see a badly laid foundation, but it isn't too late to correct that... Go back to school, create a relationship with ur lecturers, probably that might help hasten the release of ur results... Don't spend ur time worrying over all what you don't have, rather, that God for the little you have...

In the interim, instead of sitting idly at home, you can engage urself in a little trade, or some handwork... Think of what makes u happy, work on it and establish urself in that regard... God bless

arcbay:


Count yourself amongst the lucky ones, remember there are a whole lot of people who couldn't attend school just because of financial problems, and there are some who dropped out for the same reason...

Your situation isn't as bad as u see it. From my point of view, I see a badly laid foundation, but it isn't too late to correct that... Go back to school, create a relationship with ur lecturers, probably that might help hasten the release of ur results... Don't spend ur time worrying over all what you don't have, rather, that God for the little you have...

In the interim, instead of sitting idly at home, you can engage urself in a little trade, or some handwork... Think of what makes u happy, work on it and establish urself in that regard... God bless

Thanks a million for the insightful response. However, i have done the outstanding but they say the school senate has not yet approved it that i should exercise a little more patience, but i'm just considering some stuff like age as there's time for everything you know, plus things i ought to have achieved,where i ought to have been right now.Trading is out of the question as their no fund to institute that besides i don't even think i can do that. The only thing i do is play piano and i play that primarily in my father's church,anything aside that i just wake up every morning press phone or run errands. I'm so sick and tired of it all.

Rostel2:
Thanks a million for the insightful response. However, i have done the outstanding but they say the school senate has not yet approved it that i should exercise a little more patience, but i'm just considering some stuff like age as there's time for everything you know, plus things i ought to have achieved,where i ought to have been right now.Trading is out of the question as their no fund to institute that besides i don't even think i can do that. The only thing i do is play piano and i play that primarily in my father's church,anything aside that i just wake up every morning press phone or run errands. I'm so sick and tired of it all.

If playing the piano is what makes u happy, develop urself in that field and watch ur talent take shape.. There are a lot of successful keyboardist who have made a mark in life... Put ur mind at rest, in due time, the Senate will approve ur result and u will be mobilized. And stop being worried about age, success and greatness has no age limit...

arcbay:


If playing the piano is what makes u happy, develop urself in that field and watch ur talent take shape.. There are a lot of successful keyboardist who have made a mark in life... Put ur mind at rest, in due time, the Senate will approve ur result and u will be mobilized. And stop being worried about age, success and greatness has no age limit...

Thank you. You just made my day!

Rostel2.

Truth is....Your life is in your hands. You can choose to continue expecting manna from heaven without any appreciable work or you can go out there and fix things and pray God bless whatever uyou lay your hands on.

When faced with challenges, you need to first understand what the problems is/arefrom there you can chart a way forward.

YOU had 2 outstanding courses in school but you are just relying on heresays about they sending your result to the senate so you can go for service.
Question is, have those results been cleared?
Have you passed them with verifiable evidence? If yes/no proc3ed to school, spend at leat a week there and make sure you know the true status of things.

If that's sorted....at least you know what's your next move. Service or going back to write those exams(if you hadn't truly passed them)


But in the interim. I would advise you get something doing. Even if it's a primary school that offers you a teaching job or somewhere you are able to earn something. Even if the pay just covers transport and feeding.. STAYING HOME and doing nothing is the greatest disservice you would do to youtself. There's that confidence that comes with going out daily, having a purpose and waking up looking forward to doing something worthwhile than sleeping at home.

Rostel2:
Thank you. You just made my day!

You're welcome, anytime... Happy to know you're OK now

Hi Rostel2. I agree with arcbay: if you enjoy playing the piano and are good at it, keep it up and see how you turn it into a business of some sort. Or see if you can join a music school (sometimes all they need is someone who's really good at playing a particular instrument - to teach others). You have a gift and should share it. What other skills and talents do you have? Think of ways you can profit from them. I hope they'll release your results soon. Things will turn around for you. Keep your head up.

shuneri1:
I will quickly state my issue in a short text. I had planned for four years through my bsc. I am a penny pincher and was able to make well over 2 million naira. Going to serve in abj, I decided to spoil my self a little and buy a car and then sell it off at the end of my youth service. I also fed myself and got a house in abj thinking I would seek employment...but I lost half of my money for a very foolish decision to buy a car(duped by my brother who I don't talk to anymore). I am going to be 22 this year, searching endlessly for work (this link is a part of my story: https://www.nairaland.com/2181141/toxic-father-less-optimum-mother). I have decided i either go and live in the north where it would be cheap or commit suicide by 23. There are no counsellors in nigeria to help only pastors who tell you to pray...I have prayed for 21 years and am tired...I am not Job. There is no family anywhere to help, the men I ask for help want to sleepy with me, I'd rather die that do that. The man I have called father abuses i and my sis and my brother alone...he sent the others for msc, dint send us, not that am bothered but no job. My mother is too dependent on me, my sister owes me money and would rather spend it on boys, my brother from emotional abuse is useless and dosent want to work, he's waiting for someone to breast feed him. I am the only one with a plan...and now I am faced with the decision to move out with my 1 million. We done eat in the house, we don't use the cars, we have been chased out several times, for how long where is God...
www.nairaland.com/2181141/toxic-father-less-optimum-mother

Babe....As much I feel we should show empathy to people who are going through whatever challenges. Your story sounds and seems more like someone who is unrealistic and believes she is entitled to some certain luxuries of life always and such things must always fall in place for them as they journey through life without sweat and in cases where the contrary happens she is gonna take the easy way out.

I am sorry, you need to go out more and see what life truly is. Some people have been penny pinchers all their life and they do not even have anything to show for it. You are just 22 and just staring life and you are contemplating such drastic thoughts. First remove that talk of threatening us with suicide, then find somewhere to sit down.

There are people who are in far worse situations than yours. Unemployed and penniless. Go to jobs/vacancies section and read tales of people in their 30s and 40s still seeking employment and with responsibilities of a wife and children inclusive.

You have got a million naira. Why are you still seeking out "men" to help you?

Most succesful biz today in Nigeria started on far lesser capital. It all takes perseverance, proper planning and dedication to get to the millions and billions you hear them worth today.

Forget about what happened to your earlier 1 million that someone ate up. That's in the past. Except there's a clear possibility of you getting it back. That should be the least of your concerns. Focus more on what you have to do with the funds available to you now. What are your passion? What skills aside your certificate do you have?

There's always endles possibilities and lots of niches you can invest on.Just look around you and you would see problems that people are facing and services they are lacking. Learn to fix such things and invest your time and money in it and you are on your way to prosperity.


And lastly don't go seeking a visa agent or something now. You sound desperate and may just end up in the wrong hands. Sit down and make calculated moves not sentimental ones. GOOD LUCK.

onegig:
Rostel2.

Truth is....Your life is in your hands. You can choose to continue expecting manna from heaven without any appreciable work or you can go out there and fix things and pray God bless whatever uyou lay your hands on.

When faced with challenges, you need to first understand what the problems is/arefrom there you can chart a way forward.

YOU had 2 outstanding courses in school but you are just relying on heresays about they sending your result to the senate so you can go for service.
Question is, have those results been cleared?
Have you passed them with verifiable evidence? If yes/no proc3ed to school, spend at leat a week there and make sure you know the true status of things.

If that's sorted....at least you know what's your next move. Service or going back to write those exams(if you hadn't truly passed them)


But in the interim. I would advise you get something doing. Even if it's a primary school that offers you a teaching job or somewhere you are able to earn something. Even if the pay just covers transport and feeding.. STAYING HOME and doing nothing is the greatest disservice you would do to youtself. There's that confidence that comes with going out daily, having a purpose and waking up looking forward to doing something worthwhile than sleeping at home.

making sense all d way! hope she will take to ur advice

Search

Blastfinito:
The only thing keeping me from commiting suicide is that those who think I'm a good Christian will be extremely disappointed in me. My grandparents and mother are dead. Father disappeared for 29years b4 he was found 2years ago, but is now nobody. I have two brothers that are financially okay. They supported me thru my university days while I was still doing part-time teaching jobs. Afta NYSC, I established a business at the town wia I was posted to. Indigenes that were already in that biz rose against me physically and spiritually. I didnt nid a soothsayer to know that my life was in danger, so I left, despite my heavy investment on furniture, wiring etc. I came back wit my computer, printing machines and generator and started staying wit my brother. The day I was nt around, they burnt the generator because of lack of technical know-how. He said he has no money that I can use to get a shop and other equipments. His wife victimizes me daily. I went to my vilage to try to teach wia I was teachin durin my school days, they said a big man has arived on sighting me. The room I was using then is no longer mine. Who will feed me for the first month if I start the job, and under whose roof wil I rest my head? My brother's wife at Lagos hates me more than feaces. The problem now is that I'm always sick. No money to buy drugs as my brother is tired of me in term of feeding, drugs etc. I dont sleep at night due to d nature of my sickness. I took HIV test, it came out negative. I was using a herbal tea bought by my broda's wife to manage my body, later she said I should go and buy mine. I have partial hearing impairment, so, lukin 4 jobs is nt an option. I want to sell my laptop, but it's nw faulty. I can't sleep. Today, my broda was angry wit me because a neighbor, a girl, who I'm about ten years olda than called me by name. Brother said I must have wooed her to deserve such insults. I can't even remember joking wit her let alone wooing her. Why do you think I deserve to live? I'm a very good writer. When I came back 3months ago, I started a novel I had conceived over the years, and I completed it. This is nt just a boy friend/girl friend frolicking that is now becoming the bane of Nigerian literary space. I told my brother that I need 8000 naira to get the manuscript read by BlackTower Publishers as a condition that sud be met, he said I should wait. He's a building contractor getting unskilled labourers to sites; I asked him to allow me work with those folks, bt he said it's not meant for a learned person. I just have to die, I presume.

It is a phase and it sure would pass away. Why do you think your partial hearing impairment is an impediment from you getting a job? If you use it to your advantage, it sure would work for you. In the mean time, do you think there is any school or coaching center around you that you can teach at least to keep yourself busy? Also, if you think your brother's place is no longer conducive, do you have a friend whom you can stay with pending when you sort out yourself?

I think i need help.

Alex, do ya got an idea what kinda help ya need first? Can you tell us? Maybe we can find resources or help findin dem.

Good on you for recognizing you need help. Please stay strong and go for it as long as it takes to find the help you need, and one suiting you.

Blastfinito
hello....may I know where you live? The city or town?
I ask so that if it is a place I have friends in I can ask you to go for a medical consultation with any of them
About the manuscript...has it been read?

sending you HUGS....
please choose to live, okay?

If you have a story you would like to share anonymously? Nigeria's first anonymous portal is here. Go to confessionsnigeria.com and join the discussion.

ConfessionsNgr:
If you have a story you would like to share anonymously? Nigeria's first anonymous portal is here. Go to confessionsnigeria.com and join the discussion.

This is not a freaking confession room...
These people are sad and tired of life.
They need help and not some confession tag.
Oh God!

K

Rostel2:
Somebody should please advice me on what i can do to turn my life around. I'm 29years old and i don't have anything yet,i don't even know what i want anymore as i feel frustrated worst case scenario i still stay in my parents house nowhere to go all i do is sleep and wake up everyday doing nothing. i went to uni but i haven't gotten my certificate although i had two outstanding when i was about graduating in 2010.it really delayed me going for service even as i type now i have not yet gone for youth service as my department keep telling me they are still working on the results for senate approval.Everyone has left me behind. i wake up every morning with a heavy heart and tears sometimes i even find it hard to sleep. It's so tiresome.

I really cannot feel your pain but I know someone who went through a similar situation. Google Steve Harris, I have one of his materials that you can help you or better yet pm me lets find a way to get it to you