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I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree - Romance (5) - Nairaland

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Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by tobsonkings: 5:51am On Apr 03, 2015
Isnt it possible start your Msc and go on with your marriage. I think its his simple way to say goodbye. For you. Start your Msc first, if he truly loves you. He will change his mind and if not , pls move on. I dont have a Msc but my wife just started hers and am the one paying with joy. Wish you all the best Dearie.
Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by Vectorchuks: 5:51am On Apr 03, 2015
Pray in tongues fervently and you will see the light
Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by basisop(m): 6:09am On Apr 03, 2015
Marry that guy now and still continue your masters dream. It will be a win-win for both of you.

I faced similar situation with my ex. When it was time for me to settle down, that was when she got admission in a UK university for masters. I told her that both dreams could be achieved simultaneously but she prefered to go and come back because that the program is just a year and few months. Saying if I love her and wish her well that I should wait.

Yes, I loved her but her dreams shouldn't affect mine. Taking a decision to settle down as a guy is one hell of a task plus pressure from parents to marry as an only son.

She left for her masters, we kept in touch via Skype, two months after, I couldn't wait because that one year was like one decade.

I took a decision that I couldn't wait because I never told her I will. Fortunately, I ran into a nice, beautiful lady that I knew way back, we dated for few months and I popped the question, she agreed. I quickly married her while the other one was chasing her masters dream.

This is 3 years now, we have two children plus my wife has also finished her masters in a Nigerian University from my house, I told her to apply for Phd because she is super intelligent. She is also working in a good company now.

My ex is also working in a good company too after her masters but without me in her life. She told her friends she regrets the move.

Thank God she went for that masters oo because this my wife is just designed for me simply the best wife. Few months after our wedding I lost my Dad, if I had waited for the masters dream girl, my Dad would have missed my wedding and wouldn't be in my wedding photos?

So, Op can achieve both goals without forfeiting the other to avoid regrets. Kapish!!!

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Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by niceguy7(m): 6:13am On Apr 03, 2015
dre11:




http://www.tribune.com.ng/quicklinkss/converse-with-yemisi/item/33111-i-m-torn-between-him-and-masters-degree
Ur friend is a good friend
Do as she has instructed you.
But i tink u cn still get married and still do ur masters degree naa.
Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by Sharksblow(m): 6:20am On Apr 03, 2015
bisous:
Hmmmm, this is like being between the devil and the Red sea and only prayer can sort her out.
She may choose the man and he turns out to be a beast,and she may choose the masters and have to wait till she's 40 to come close to marriage again.........

The processes for finding,getting and doing a Master's programme is not as tedious as the processes for finding and marrying a good(only her can tell if he is a good man or not) man and she can always get her Masters done after marriage that is if he is a good man
She can only pray
The man is definitely not right. no need to pray. he wants to enslave her. the best he could have done is to tell her to do introduction with him and then go for her masters. Part time masters for that matter.
Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by Rajman45(m): 6:21am On Apr 03, 2015
Such a funny story. Do you know how many master holder are out there looking for jobs. Or do u think that master degree will guarantee you a job.. Then u most be really joking. Any guy in this forum that tell you to abandon ur wedding for a MSc is not interested in ur progress and like wise the female are not interested in your happiness, cus there wish is for you to become single as them. Don't mind all these enemies of progress, but listed to ur parents. Let go of the wedding for one reason only.. Which is ur parents, after u most have tried seriously to make them understand, that u love him, but not because of a useless degree that won't make u any better. In fact, u can further ur education in ur matrimonial home....... I have seen so many people doing it.

2 Likes

Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by scarffield(m): 6:36am On Apr 03, 2015
[color=#990000][/color]oil company
Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by Whizzing(m): 6:36am On Apr 03, 2015
Hello sweetheart.. Pple here will give tons and tons of advice that u will b confused to pick d actual one.... What I will suggest is move closer to GOD in prayer... That's what u need at dis junction and u will b amazed at how easy it will actually be when HE is done with d situation.. All d Best.
Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by WhyNa: 6:37am On Apr 03, 2015
SagePerv:
Marriage still remains the ultimate achievement to every woman. Forget the masters programme.

Stop chasing vanity. Go & get married.




Marriage is NOT the ultimate achievement for a woman.
Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by kento15: 6:39am On Apr 03, 2015
@ Dygeasy, Masters programme is no longer a program of leisure lyk u think I don't knw if u hv been tru or tot of doing it in d nearest future, its now a marathon race dt only d brave can get 2 d finishing line, so she shd better do it now dt she's still single else she probably may not be able 2 do it @ marriage. I speak 4rm experience. Gd luck 2 u dear as u mk d right choice @ d ryt tym
Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by Nobody: 6:40am On Apr 03, 2015
A man who can't invest in your career as a single lady will hinder your personal development when married to him. #FullTimeHousewifeThings
Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by Nweike1: 6:40am On Apr 03, 2015
bisous:
Hmmmm, this is like being between the devil and the Red sea and only prayer can sort her out.
She may choose the man and he turns out to be a beast,and she may choose the masters and have to wait till she's 40 to come close to marriage again.........

The processes for finding,getting and doing a Master's programme is not as tedious as the processes for finding and marrying a good(only her can tell if he is a good man or not) man and she can always get her Masters done after marriage that is if he is a good man
She can only pray
sound advice. Thats how a girl i would have married missed the opportunity because she wanted to travel abroad for her masters. I even promised to sponsor the masters after she's had a kid. She's back now, no reasonable job, no man to marry her and frustrated. Regretting bitterly dat she didnt settle down with me then

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Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by adanduka: 6:46am On Apr 03, 2015
SagePerv:
Marriage still remains the ultimate achievement to every woman. Forget the masters programme.

Stop chasing vanity. Go & get married.





Sure those are your grandma's favorite words.
Make sure you repeat them to your baby girls till they grow up.
@OP, go do your masters. That guy isn't for you.
Marriage is always good and desirable but once you marry the wrong person, your life turns downhill.
Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by humbleabdul(m): 6:57am On Apr 03, 2015
To begin with, I don't think your mum would know the will of God for you..if at all the will of God is revealed to anyone, it would be to you, IMO.
I would implore you to pray on your own and realise that no one would protect your interest like you'll do. If you ask me, marriage should be your primary objective at this stage of your life but not unless you pray about it though. May God guide you throuh
Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by beentarh(f): 7:01am On Apr 03, 2015
Pretty young lady, your value shouldn't be in a man's earnings or job. Have a self worth, pls. Go for your career, if he truly loves you, he should wait. If he can't, your right man will come. Gone are those days when ladies go after rich men, now reverse is the case. A responsible man will love and celebrate you when you become a success. My own case is a good example. All the young men I rejected because of my career are now looking up to me and wished they could have waited to have an asset like me haven completed my PhD at 30. The man who truly loves me waited from NCE - M.ED, I completed my PhD in his house. Pls dear, never fall for him if he doesn't value your career, cos soonest, he would complain you closes late from work or you don't have time for the family and you should choose between your job and the family. A word is enough for the wise, be warned!

1 Like

Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by holysaint1(m): 7:16am On Apr 03, 2015
ronald4lif:
What a condition. angry

She should dump his sorry ass and pursue her career/masters.

Relationship and men/women can wait but career-pursuit waits for no one. Earlier the better.

Should she succeed tomorrow drones of guys will be wrestling to win her love.

Who love don help

bro, do u knw if its d man dat will finance her? Since she has been without a job for 2yrs nw... so try puttin errythin into consideration..
Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by anitank(f): 7:20am On Apr 03, 2015
cococandy:
@bold so you know the man?
I don't honey, and neither do you. But it's 2015 and no right thinking man in this century wants his wife to stay at home doing absolutely nothing when other women are attaining greater heights in the corporate world and making names for themselves
Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by Harrycul(m): 7:24am On Apr 03, 2015
Girl leave the dude & pursue ur career. True Love is unconditional.
Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by Nobody: 7:27am On Apr 03, 2015
it is advisable you have a good home first before u further your education.we have many PhD holders ladies who are still praying to have a man of their choice .make good use of the opportunity you have now.

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Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by cococandy(f): 7:27am On Apr 03, 2015
anitank:

I don't honey, and neither do you. But it's 2015 and no right thinking man in this century wants his wife to stay at home doing absolutely nothing when other women are attaining greater heights in the corporate world and making names for themselves

Well don't assume for them. A masters degree doesn't have to take anyone away from home. So For now according to the story in the post,no one can really say what his reasons are for not supporting her her educational advancement.

I wish I were optimistic like you to believe that no right thinking man in this century wants a woman that's not progressing financially or academically.
Just do a little opinion poll on nairaland alone and you will see that such men abound.

1 Like

Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by Montaque(m): 7:29am On Apr 03, 2015
Sharksblow:

The man is definitely not right. no need to pray. he wants to enslave her. the best he could have done is to tell her to do introduction with him and then go for her masters. Part time masters for that matter.
don't judge a fellow man harshly before meeting him.
Take a careful look at the flow of thought of the written article of the OP, you will discover she is not the "fluid" witty type. She may not have given up herself to negotiating with this man.
This man may be averting the possibility of losing his wife to a sleek uni bf, we were also in sch and we knew what happened. I even decided to marry a woman who is out of sch completely.
So don't blame the man,he is securing what he wants to have,and may have given ultimatum because of the way the lady is going about it.
The only serious issue is the G factor. The OP should hear from God PERSONALLY... We saw some prophecy go wrong during the last election.

1 Like

Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by Kassidy90(m): 7:33am On Apr 03, 2015
If its a Part- Time program and he still can't accept bae please delete his number ASAP....
Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by Exponental(m): 7:37am On Apr 03, 2015
dont marry him. he is selfish. he will never want u ahead of him. he will not respect u. he is not caring.

2 Likes

Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by slimfancier(f): 7:44am On Apr 03, 2015
My dear dis whole issue is very clear, hw sure r u dat comes June he will marry u or do d marriage rights as claimed by him? To me u do not need to be confused, ur mum have seen clearly wat u do not see. just go for ur masters program n c wat God will do for u & finally do not relent in praying.
Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by martcarl(m): 7:54am On Apr 03, 2015
The guy may not want to allow u do ur masterz program but i tel u, alot of people stil get married while runnin deir masterz program. If u ar convinced dt u luv him n u can marry him, masterz program doesnt stop u frm gettin married to him weneva he wishes because lemme be frank with u, alot of girls who ar masterz students nw ar prayin seriosly for a future partner. Its better u pursue ur career as a woman while u alredi av a man dan when u dont because once u achieve ur career, anyman dat comes to u wil b like mayb he likes u cos of wat u av acquired.
Pls pray and ask for directions frm ur inner voice and try to make him undastand, at least ur hubby shuld b able to understand u if he is truly ur hubby, bt if he fails to understand u, plzzzz, it means he of low esteem and he thinks u might b greater dan him, and mayb henis scared of u nt lettin him go.
Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by Donpizzle(m): 7:57am On Apr 03, 2015
Its Simple. U re an adult so u shuld knw wat u want. If u trust ur MUM's word u shuld beta leave d guy nd go for ur degree. Abi u no wan loose OIL COMPANY WORKER?. lol
Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by LydayBobo(m): 8:15am On Apr 03, 2015
SagePerv:
Marriage still remains the ultimate achievement to every woman. Forget the masters programme.

Stop chasing vanity. Go & get married.



May the good Lord bless you silly. May God embarrass you with favour. This is most sensible response I have ever read. Masters doesn't stop marriage. Infact they can run concurrently.

2 Likes

Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by boykas(m): 8:15am On Apr 03, 2015
Many girls in this platform can't help u...
some of them don't have that high proposal not to talk of a man proposing. Pls if u have doctorate degree even mamii degree, as a womAn u will definitely end up in a kitchen. Except u don't want to have kids

stay from girls giving shit advise...

1 Like

Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by uptoHim(m): 8:15am On Apr 03, 2015
From the write up:
1. The ladies parent/parents are not in support of the guy's proposal.
2. The lady does not strongly love the man. And she is not giving him assurance. Let me know highlight on her reference to his type of job and money without talking about other things
3. The guy has patience issues. He is a difficult person, and too "authoritative"
4. The lady is not sincere in everything about this issue. Her story here even hides a lot
5. The lady is yet not matured enough, she seems to have problem with taking decisions.
6. The lady knows what to do, or has already taken a stance. And they has seen through her
7. There is no genuine love and understanding between them, that's why this little thing is causing trouble between them. Marriage can't stop an MSC drive, and MSC can't stop marriage... where there is love.

I can tell you the lady here is talking about doing this MSC abroad, and she has hidden that information here.

I wish them the best of God's plan for them
Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by iykedare(m): 8:17am On Apr 03, 2015
eckersley:

Hopefully true. Then d change does not require a folder full of degrees before it gives one a job.
If she's convinced w/o a doubt and has gotten PERSONAL spiritual clearance, she shd go ahead and marry him. After May 29th, a BSc or it equivalent shd get her(and anybody) a job in our CHANGED Nigeria

People don't understand that work experience matters more than have all the masters degree in the world. The lady doesn't even have any work experience so there is no guarantee that she will get a job after the masters. At 27, she needs to settle down and then go for her masters from her husband's house.

After her masters, she will be 29 and that isn't a good age to start looking for another suitor. It's tough getting a suitor in Nigeria. She should know this.

2 Likes

Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by anitank(f): 8:19am On Apr 03, 2015
cococandy:


Well don't assume for them. A masters degree doesn't have to take anyone away from home. So For now according to the story in the post,no one can really say what his reasons are for not supporting her her educational advancement.

I wish I were optimistic like you to believe that no right thinking man in this century wants a woman that's not progressing financially or academically.
Just do a little opinion poll on nairaland alone and you will see that such men abound.

I have profiled most Nairaland males, and majority of them are BOYS. These are not the kind of people you want to base your opinion upon my dear. Men these days boast how their wives are either directors or even CEOs in their own companies. I've met a number of them so I know. They say surround yourself with the people on the same mission as you.

But I'm not arguing with you. Like you said, we do not know the entire story, so we don't know what his real reasons are. But something tells me it's the timing that's the issue here
Re: I Am Torn Between HIM And Masters Degree by fakooblak(m): 8:24am On Apr 03, 2015
Take ur issue to God

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