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Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by lordsapphire(m): 5:16am On Apr 10, 2015 |
brother the best advice i can give to you now is to keep loving your wife.... secondly see a good marriage counsellor |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by Nobody: 5:19am On Apr 10, 2015 |
Every marriage starts having trouble around that same time. Talk to her about her malice keeping style,let her you don't want to build your home using her style. If she persists,you should ignore her. Get involve in activities that will not make you develop high blood pressure. Don't let your wife turn you into what you are not. Welcome to the new "world order". |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by msmee(f): 5:20am On Apr 10, 2015 |
I don't have any advice except maybe to try to call her sometimes and call her back when she calls you. It will probably be easier to do this than face the consequences of not doing it. |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by AMI3(m): 5:24am On Apr 10, 2015 |
My bros urs is even beta she does not make atempt 2 fight u or boo u till u get 2 where u are going. Ask her y she choose that life style. Attend marriage seminar with her. Encourage her 2 read gud books. Find out much abt their family setting in the past. Hv u complain 2 any of her family memba abt this? Let me no. |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by Nobody: 5:27am On Apr 10, 2015 |
aflyingbird:Despite the poster's apparent good mastery of Queen's English, he used the word 'marriage' 11 times, but misspelt the word 10 times. We really need to ask him the reasons behind the error. He might be in the same shoe with Op, I presume. |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by gabicon: 5:39am On Apr 10, 2015 |
multicast: Its inconsequential what happened in ur courtship the fact is u need professional help go talk to a councillor as your marriage is already on the highway to divorce its only a matter of time true frustration sets in. And pray the devil is after marriages don't let him get yours. |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by Nobody: 5:42am On Apr 10, 2015 |
coogar: Is this the new and improved coogar ? I was expecting a barrage of words expressing the vile and inconsiderate nature of the woman but you didn't even chide her , not even in the least bit. |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by Nobody: 5:43am On Apr 10, 2015 |
Moana: Typical |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by Agbo2(m): 5:44am On Apr 10, 2015 |
Did your wife ever catch you with another lady while dating? Possibly she's reacting on past experience. I think your wife needs reassurance of your undying love. Tell her practical reasons why you will never cheat on her apart from the fact that you love her. What your marriage vows mean to you. Tell her husbands who cheat never go far in life, some die prematurely while others get ruined. Your wife will stop insulting you once she stops suspecting you. |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by trappatoni(m): 5:48am On Apr 10, 2015 |
jauntty:good advice. Its like he married someone I used to know, only it didn't get to marriage. If there is one trait I hate in women its that ability to keep malice and be unforgiving but the good thing is you still have the good ones that will make your life like paradise on earth. Bro you're in it already so its damage control from now on with lots of prayers to back it up. Goodluck with your marriage. 1 Like |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by Toktee(m): 5:54am On Apr 10, 2015 |
Moana:i dnt think i told you that i regret my marriage,i only stressed the thngs that were happening whch i dnt want,and i dealt with them appropriately 2 Likes |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by georgesylva(m): 5:54am On Apr 10, 2015 |
U probably made her a full time house wife. Get her busy. |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by cole265(m): 5:56am On Apr 10, 2015 |
Just divorce her and save your self this headache. Ain't you too young for all this rubbish? |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by Sike(m): 5:57am On Apr 10, 2015 |
jauntty:Kindly elaborate the bolded please! |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by mechanics(m): 5:57am On Apr 10, 2015 |
multicast:dat was a sign den dat u took 4 granted, bros u need nt give up. Just persevere n b patient wit her, also pray 4 her. |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by Gwazah(m): 6:01am On Apr 10, 2015 |
coogar:U did not read in between the lines, she is not apologising ooh! only the husband that is giving series of apologies. |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by akinladejo: 6:03am On Apr 10, 2015 |
My guy u are the cause of this problem. U saw it coming but u blindly ignore it in d name of love during your courtship cos u said she was stubborn. You are in deep in love with her and she will continue to be treating you like that. What you are seen now is the d second face what u noticed during ur courtship but u failed to address and I can BOLDLY tell u the 3rd face and the 4th face is coming. Am sorry to tell u this your wife Is not totally in love with u and she still thinking of those thing she left behind and invariably regretting her action of marrying u and that is y she picks issues with every little thing. U got to stand up on your feet as the head and correct these issues by telling her to put an end to all those things u said u told her not to do but still doing it and be firm with it, it will look like hard decision to make because u love her but u need to do that to save ur marriage and yourself from life embarrassments. 3 Likes |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by Eluala(m): 6:05am On Apr 10, 2015 |
You probably used the words 'I so much love her' for the umpteenth time. I believe there lies the problem. Your wife is not emotionally stable and mature and she has successfully blackmailed you emotionally to the point of domination. She knows what buttons to press and there you go working to please her like a robot while she enjoys herself. You have been rewarding this behavior by omission and commission. That's marriage is recommended only for mature people especially emotion and psychological maturity. She is dominating your psyche. She is marking and protecting her territory of which you are a part. You have failed to assert yourself and the modus operandi for your relationship and that's why she is filling the gap. There is a role reversal going on. You have been too soft or love struck to see and play your role as the man of the house and now she is assuming that role. It's like spoiling a child and not being firm to punish bad behavior and expect that by some miracle when the child grows, she/he will suddenly become a good adult. My advice for you is to use your head more than your heart. Take control of the situation. Tell her in very clear terms that in a marriage, there is a head and there is an assistant. You are the head and she is the vice. She should let you take care if her and she should take care of you. At the moment she is trying to usurp your place instead of doing well in her place. You should not tolerate any of the nonsense. You have tolerated enough. Tell her that she is forgiven unconditionally for previous sins but she should go and sin no more. Pray for her in your quiet time. Institute a family devotion on a regular basis. Take the lead in sharing scripture and praying for her and the family. Be her pastor in the home and get involved in her affairs outside the home. For instance, spend time with her to know about her day at work and on your own study a little about her work so you can meaningfully contribute helpful ideas to her. Be her hero/superstar. Be the strong go to man, who needs for all her problems to be solved. It does appear to me that for now, you place too much demand on her to meet your emotional needs. You seem to me like you overwhelm her with your need for emotional affirmation - more like a child in need of attention and seeking to be pampered. She sees you like couch potatoes. It's time to be the man and temper some of this your 'I so much love you' stuff. You can reach me privately if you wish for more man to man talk. 4 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by Nobody: 6:06am On Apr 10, 2015 |
GOOD MORNING.. JUST know that MOST PASTORS will still tell u NEVER to treat ALL LADIES with KIDS GLOVES... Hope u can recall what Happened to PRESIDENT JONATHAN...? Hope u can recall how his WIFE, the 1st LADY spearheaded about 80% of his DOWNFALL..? It's simply because he TREATS her with BABY GLOVES and thereby extended that to the BOKO HARAMS as well... One thing, U must know about LADIES is that ,their BRAINS are always GROWING.. ANOTHER is that , they NEVER FORGET the ADVANTAGE they have over a MAN, especially in an ARGUMENT. I can now guess that her DAD, may likely be the RICHER DAD. PLEASE, be a MAN even if it is for once. Don't follow the TRAILS of GEJ..,,PLS! PLS!!! 4 Likes |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by Paulpaulpaul(m): 6:09am On Apr 10, 2015 |
multicast: You don't need to divorce her, a lil bit of separation would do. Familiarity breeds contempt and .... makes hearts grow fonder. You can travel or something for some time and let her feel your absence, reduce your attention and let her know she caused it then bounce back. This separation thing works, we all appreciate what we don't have easy access to or better still let her swear that she won't start that mumu drama again and when she does, remind her of her vow. |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by tiwiex(m): 6:13am On Apr 10, 2015 |
SaMajeste:I agree. They say women love men women whoee feelings are not sure. That's not always but in ur case and most, I suspect it is. Women love to chase more than we think. It makes them feel the idea is hers. In ur case, u seem to show all the love and she is bored. Usually, this does no5 lead to attractoon. It is amazing u guys got married. If you were dating, she would likely to be attracted to amother guy who she is not sure loves her. I pray that is not the case. She isbtesting your strength and uu have to find it. It sounds unfair that you love her but if u want this to work, please start giving her some distance and coldness. Get a distraction that shows u having fub0n. A sport, regular hangout. You are living a life of scarcity. Women take sdvantage of dat and push u around. Once she knows u have a life outside her, she will sit up. Bros, you have to be strong and treat her wiyh less attention. They don't like attention the way we see iy. It is a big lie. I have experienced dis a lot. Meet them, be nice then back off. If u start lovey lovey, it p4ojects uncertainty of ur confidence. She has mo work to do and they like to work for the relationship. Also pray bro but stop showing all this love. You will loose her and hate yourself. Is there someone else? I know u don't wanna hear that. But, she might be attracted to someone treating her coldly sef. Buiod ur attraction back. You can goohle in that area too. Start treating her like a normalerson. Tge way u talk and trwat ur friends. Take her hang out. No lovey lovey. Said enough. Pele. 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by creepsyme(f): 6:14am On Apr 10, 2015 |
[quote author=multicast post=32535385] she was a little bit of a stubborn and volatile person but its worse now quote.[ any eyes dat will go blind at nite will begin to produce puss in the morng, u dnt expect tings to get better in marriage wen they are bad in courtship. I really empathise with u but I tink ur wife need to be taughht a lesson to enable her wake up from her slumber, perhaps she tinks she is still your girlfriend. ignore her for sometime but pls dnt give reason to suspect u r cheating. and report her to her patents let dem call her to order odawise u will find urself walk away. 1 Like |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by publicenemy(m): 6:15am On Apr 10, 2015 |
multicast: Be patient with her it. Will pass.you got married febuary. She is still cominng to terms With spending the rest of hher life with you or she is just trying to let herself trust you with her heart and life by pushing you to your limits and watching ur reaction. Donnt confirm her fears by being violent,just continue with the maturity it will pass. Happy married life. |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by anibestlala(m): 6:15am On Apr 10, 2015 |
multicast:so she isn't being strange after all,just advancing from what you knew |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by Nobody: 6:15am On Apr 10, 2015 |
Savvyij:don't u people ever get tired? Every iSsue raised is "sit down aand talk to her" ah ah!!! Even when the guy said he has don dat countless times! I just tire for this NL females; if u really lack ideas why not refrain and allow people dat do to comment.... Mchewww!!! pomsky:when u hear men talk u know; u can see and feel it as displayed here, not that small girl coming to disturb the peace of NL with the overflogged plattitude "sit down and talk to her" ... Nonsense darlenese:u see them; them don come again; why won't u people just restt and stayy clear of this thread! Kai!!! I hate u girls.. ITK dat knows notthing.... Mchew!!!! Lizabeth25:. Madam whatt is ur problem? Are u alright? So now to solve practtical problems is to kneel down every morning... And dat will "transform " her abruptly... I pity u all... OP my advice; please fellow what pelumsky(hope I got that right) has writtten; dat is 1st hhand experience talking... Donot mind all these kids advicing in what tthey know notthing about (most of them not even been to the frontyard of marriage)... If that approach doesn't work n every other means fails; my brother pls feel free to go ur seperate ways; Marriage is not a must; u shouldn't die or get frustrated in it... All the best sire.. 6 Likes |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by tiwiex(m): 6:18am On Apr 10, 2015 |
boluyongp:He missed some stages. Time to restart. Treat her with less interest and love. Wonen mo dey respect I am sorry men oh. Leave allbthat I want a caring man and God fearing. What does that mean anyway? I am sur the OP has better chemistry with oyher women. Why does OP love her anyway? |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by webguru(m): 6:18am On Apr 10, 2015 |
Its common with ladies..but don;t stop loving her as you have. Doing house chores et al is great inspiration for your future kids I think her studies and work may be aggravating things. Kidnap her to a secluded place and reason it out...together...alone.... and PRAY |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by soleexx(m): 6:18am On Apr 10, 2015 |
Bro my advice for you is to take it easy with her and keep calm...but if this behavior continues then you need to go thru some process wit her like.... *afford taken her food *dont sleep on same bed *keep ur plans away from her *treat her like a stranger If dis can go for a week den she will feel lonely and judged...she will be forced to approach u and beg you and das all...u live happily after When its works don't thank me... 1 Like |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by marychommy(f): 6:19am On Apr 10, 2015 |
Sorry it happened this soon,some ladys r just like this but my advice wake her up in d night when everywhere is silent tell her u know she cant change dis soon cos it has been her life but let her kn dat her attitude may make d love u have for her to decrease and when dat happens it will be late for her and if it didn't work out. Leave her for abt 2weeks she will change by force. Dont 4get to take it to God in prayer[color=#006600][/color] |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by grimandevil: 6:19am On Apr 10, 2015 |
lofty900: guy you are so on point. I so much hate that sit her down statement. before will I stand her up? Lol |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by Nobody: 6:20am On Apr 10, 2015 |
multicast: Power of a relationship lies in the hand of one who cares less. Look her in the eyes and tell her that you will kick her a.ss out of the house if she does not change her ways. Be serious about it. Man up. |
Re: My 2 Months Old Marriage Is Crashing - HELP ME by kingogundana: 6:24am On Apr 10, 2015 |
Your marriage is too early not too young to be having problem or challenges! Meaning your Marriage is too young or over young to encounter this challenges, marriage of how many month? God forbid Devil, Amen Sit your wife down whenever you see she is in happy or good mood let her know her attitude and tell her what you are going through whenever she is misbehaving Let your wife know that her attitude can push YOU away or make her marriage crash before her own eye Get her a books or movie that will help your marriage on attitude If she did not improve pray for her, involve your pastor or imam, a marriage counsellor,please make sure the person know more about marriage or the person have experience about marriage But if you need more counselling about marriage free of charge send me a personal message I will give you a call free cos I hate marriage crashing God will give you the wisdom you need in your home Amen |
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