-- Copyright (c) 2015 tai on Nairaland. All rights reserved --

This piece is for potential travellers in the foreign section. All those looking to leave the shores of Nigeria to make it to foreign lands (obodo oyibo) at all and any cost in order to leave behind what they perceive to be the frustration and lack of progress in Nigeria. Only to land in strange destinations and find out all is not as it seems, with no means of return or imprisonment for crime or debt or even suicide and death. Read and be warned.

1. Cost

This is the number one disadvantage with obodo oyibo. That mouth watering salary you were told you would earn abroad i.e. anywhere from $2000 to $10,000 a month and you were converting its equivalent to Naira, lol, better throw away those calculations.

Getting the job or the money is one thing in the first place. Saving enough is another. Everything is expensive. So don’t think you will “manage” on $200 a month and then send the rest to Nigeria and build a palace to rival that of the richest man in your village.

In obodo oyibo, you must pay for everything, electricity, water, tax, food, plumbers, and carpenters. There is no Nigerian “oga abeg them never pay me, I dey wait for money”. Fail to pay your bills and your electricity will be cut off. If you live in a land of cold, the cold may kill you or if you live in a hot country, you may die of heat stroke and people may not find you until the smell of your body disturbs your neighbors or your landlord remembers you haven’t paid rent.

It is not Nigeria, where you squat for free in one brother or friends house and eat free food, with nobody ever wondering when you are going to get a job or get your own house. In obodo oyibo, your blood brother will throw you out if you are not contributing to the bills.

The more savings you come with while you do whatever you intend to do to make money (school, find a job etc.), the better off you are. Otherwise be prepared to suffer when your money runs out, as it will. Two million naira is nothing. Obodo oyibo will swallow that money in one month or three days if you are not careful and spit you out like orange seeds.

2. Lack of Jobs

You’re running off to Europe? Lol. The people in Europe are running to the Middle East, Asia and the U.S to find better jobs. Not every country in Europe is an opportunity. Simply because someone came to you with visa runs or told you of his brother that is “making it” in one country that sounds like something foreign and exciting does not mean it is true.

Yes, you see them all the time. They will take pictures standing near the Eiffel Tower, Burj Khalifa, Sydney Opera House, the Statue of Liberty etc. Please do not be deceived. Taking pictures in beautiful locations does not necessarily translate to enjoyment. Some people have not eaten, others are wondering how to pay their next rent. They are mostly taking pictures to show their relatives in Nigeria, that all is well and their brother is enjoying. The reality is much much different.

Getting a job in obodo oyibo is not easy, except you are looking for the lowest of jobs in some places, which will turn out to be a rat race. You work and all your money disappears, while you have to keep working just to survive. You won’t even have time to search for another job or time to read for that certificate qualification you were told will bring you millions (NEBOSH,CCIE and co). In fact it is cheaper to do the professional certificate course in Nigeria at 60 k, than to come to obodo oyibo and do it for the equivalent of N 400,000.

The white man does not care whether you are a Master’s degree holder from the University of Bujumbura, or whether you were the Chief Manager of one bank in your village. As far as most of them are concerned, Africa is a jungle where houses are built of thatch and mud and all of you live on charity from the developed world, so where did you find a university to go to? How come you even speak English? The fact that Nigeria is a rich country is only known by Nigerians.

You will only avoid this problem if you find work with a multinational or a place that does business with people from countries around the world. In such places they have people who have worked in Africa and know that at least there are well-read people from places like Nigeria and Angola. However, you will have to show you have experience, which means dropping your degree and retraining. Yes. You need to get obodo oyibo degree and their experience to prove your worth. International certifications may help regardless of the country you got them e.g Nigeria but that is not the end of the story.

So for people with money, get a good Master’s degree (not Master’s in philosophy o) from a good institution in your country of choice. Find an entry level job first of all (remember you came from Africa and have no obodo oyibo working experience.) that gives you the chance to grow, not a job that has no growth prospects. Then over time you can prove your worth. The good thing is when you have obodo oyibo working experience and certificates it is easier to get work that will help you survive. If you have Phd in Nigeria, nobody cares. There are jobs you apply for that your Nigerian over-degree will be a curse sef instead of a blessing.

If you were a Bank Manager in Nigeria. Leave your Bank and your Manager in Lagos, nobody in Obodo Oyibo cares, as far as they are concerned, there are no banks in Africa, you people use cowries for money.

If somebody tells you they are “hustling” or “on the streets” in obodo oyibo. Run. The only street business that brings money is crime and sooner or later they get caught and pay for it. For every hustler that has “succeeded” and built properties in Nigeria, there are 100 others locked in prison, dead or buried. Do not be a victim or claim you have special luck. Probability does not know luck or the prayers of your mother in the village.

3. Racism

Lol. Being a black man or woman is tough in this world. Oyibo that bathes twice or three times a week to save water, will hold their nose when they see you. Some people will openly refuse to serve you, some will refuse to even answer you or give you a job.

Racism is everywhere, the level of racism depends on the country i.e are you in a country as hard as Poland or in one where they have a lot of people of different races such as the United States? If you live in a city with people from different countries, it tends to be much less.

Its not all bad, some people will actually like you for being black others will detest you. The point is you don’t know who is going to hiss at you in the morning or smile, which can be depressing.

Also the poorer you are and the poorer the society you live in, the more racism you are likely to suffer. Rich people are welcome anywhere. A rich black man will think he is the most loved person in the world in some of these places but still some people will not care and look at you like you were coated in dawadawa and smell of the substance. You need a strong mind for this one.


4. Loneliness

In Nigeria, its never hard to make friends. Even with Iya that owns the provision store near your house, where you can sit down and discuss everything from the thieves that are stealing Nigeria’s money to that single woman in your compound who is always entertaining men with different cars at all hours of the day.

In Obodo Oyibo, nobody has time to sit around and discuss. Your neighbour will see you in the morning and walk past without saying hello. The person smiling for you in the store is only trying to separate you from your money. You cannot call people to gist with them on the phone and spend one or two hours. Calling Nigeria however might be easier because of Internet calls, however when you have to work for food you have little time to socialize.

Over time you might learn to make friends with co-workers, other Nigerians and other people, but it will take a lot of time. People you spend time gisting with today might not even acknowledge you tomorrow. That is the way it is.

5. Nothing is Free

Nothing is free in Obodo Oyibo. In several places if you decide to sit down, you must pay. You cannot sit in a restaurant gisting with your friend for two hours buying nothing. Or go to a bar and watch free football without buying booze. If somebody offers you something for free, check closely, there’s a price hidden somewhere.

Your Nigerian countrymen will hide food under their bed if you’re coming to visit. Nobody is in the business of “come and eat”. Some will see you through keyhole and not even open the door.

Bus will be paid for, taxi will not carry you for free. You will account for the water you bathe with, the electricity you use to toast bread, even the one you use to watch TV. Some people even put off all the lights in their house and operate in semi-darkness just to cope with the bills.

Except your friends are Yahoo Yahoo men. Nobody will carry you to bar and buy booze for everybody. You will pay for your own alcohol or at least contribute to the bill. That Nigerian pattern of following one big boy up and down to eat and drink free does not exist here. People who start it abroad never end up well.

If you’re lucky you will find a girlfriend to ease tension. But even girlfriends are expensive sef especially when it’s a Nigerian babe. Many young men are forced to find “Milan” aka ashewo just to deposit something somewhere.

This is why many Obodo Oyibo guys go and import babes from Nigeria in the name of marriage so they can have somebody to be doing all the doables in the cold of Obodo Oyibo.


I might have forgotten to add one or two other things. The summary of the matter however is that obodo oyibo is great when you have money, foreign qualifications, obodo oyibo experience and a job in a proper company.

Without these things, you are very likely to suffer. This is why you see so many obodo oyibo people building houses in Nigeria and saying “East or West, home is best”, because at the end of the day, while 2 million naira will not build a cubicle to live in obodo oyibo, in Nigeria it can get you a house you can live for free without bothering about eviction. In Nigeria all you have to do is have a house you own. Food will come from anywhere and everywhere. In obodo oyibo, so many people pay one form of modern slavery every month for 30 years called mortgage, just to have a house that is their own in old age and survive on pension.

This is rubbish.if this is what you are going through,then wahala dey..altho not so 100°/ . but it isnt as bad as you put it.. But true true job matter no easy

The only thing I'll miss in Naija if I ever leave is our food. .. Our local foods dey sweet no be small


Then maybe naija craziness, you can bring your friends over to your house, drink, shout, dance with your music at the highest volume ... etc..


Meanyl, the poster above me has mouth odour, really choking me here .

MarvellousGod:
The only thing I'll miss in Naija if I ever leave is our food. .. Our local foods dey sweet no be small


Then maybe naija craziness, you can bring your friends over to your house, drink, shout, dance with your music at the highest volume ... etc..


Meanyl, the poster above me has mouth odour, really choking me here .

Yeah, I completely forgot about food. No peppersoup, no suya, no nkwobi.

Poster, what do you mean by lack of jobs? That statement is false abeg. If you are well qualified, got relevant experience and are LEGALLY in the country then getting a good job wouldn't be a problem at all.. In fact, jobs boku for UK if you know what you are doing.

Aside from that, everything else said is true.

yorubadelta:
Poster, what do you mean by lack of jobs? That statement is false abeg. If you are well qualified, got relevant experience and are LEGALLY in the country then getting a good job wouldn't be a problem at all.. In fact, jobs boku for UK if you know what you are doing.

Aside from that, everything else said is true.

You obviously didn't read through. I acknowledged the fact that jobs are available for those with relevant (foreign ) qualifications and experience. However someone who is a bank manager in Nigeria should not expect to walk into the United Kingdom and get a well-paying job with a high street London bank. There are far too many Nigerians without the requisite foreign experience and qualifications who end up roaming around with no destination.

tai2:


You obviously didn't read through. I acknowledged the fact that jobs are available for those with relevant (foreign ) qualifications and experience. However someone who is a bank manager in Nigeria should not expect to walk into the United Kingdom and get a well-paying job with a high street London bank. There are far too many Nigerians without the requisite foreign experience and qualifications who end up roaming around with no destination.

This may be true for some.. what I see Nigerians do when they first arrive is to limit themselves and limit their circle, listening to advise from fellow Nigerians who have been here so long with nothing to show for it.

If that qualified banker rolls with the right people who know what they are doing, he would secure a great job without much struggle.

A very close friend of mine became a senior drug safety scientist within 3yrs of arriving the UK.. dude has a 2.2 in microbiology from Onabisi Onabanjo Uni.. no masters, no previous work experience. It was a lady he met in the industry that put him through how to package his cv to get the job.

So you see it not that Nigerian qualifications is looked down upon here.

true!! ...nice one

All true but with many exaggerations sha. It was a good comical read.

[i]@OP
Those two posters above me get experience......please help us confirm what the OP said.....[/I]

A very good thread here.

dechandel:
Taxi will not carry you for free in Obodo Oyibo?? And in which part of Nigeria do you see cab men doing that Charity work??
Nothing is free in Obodo Oyibo? Is anything free in Nigeria? Even the electricity that isn't free in Nigeria is a mess but in Obodo Oyibo what do you get? I guess you really dunno what 24/7 eletricity is though?


Loneliness? When you have your Job, school, trust me, your social life won't be in shambles!

Cost? I am sure you prefer paying your Light bills and yet you keep buying litres of petrol daily!! Talk about cost!!
Tax? If Nigeria wasn't ruled by greedy old mofos, trust me, you'd really be glad to catch a reality of what it is to live in a civilized world!!




There is no place like home when it comes to our food sha

In Nigeria you can get favours done when you don't have any money. You can ask the taxi guy to reduce his fare based on you don't have too much. In obodo oyibo, taxi guy will point to the metre. I hope you know even with sporadic power supply not everyone pays their light bills in Nigeria, PHCN cuts the power in the afternoon, you go and reconnect them later during the day. Lol.

Interesting. . .

Nice write up, you have summarized everything

tai2:


Yeah, I completely forgot about food. No peppersoup, no suya, no nkwobi.

I'm coming back to have a years-worth of these in just two weeks of break. The name nkwobi alone takes my taste buds on a fantasy trip.

Meanwhile the OP was right, the circumstances of your migration would determine the outcomes of your stay. For those of you whom still believe the pasture is greener outside, be ready to push drugs and be pushed to jail if not killed.

MarvellousGod:
The only thing I'll miss in Naija if I ever leave is our food. .. Our local foods dey sweet no be small


Then maybe naija craziness, you can bring your friends over to your house, drink, shout, dance with your music at the highest volume ... etc..


Meanyl, the poster above me has mouth odour, really choking me here .

you can still be crazy abroad.. Its even more fun abroad

No suya shaa..i miss that

AlphaMoi:
you can still be crazy abroad.. Its even more fun abroad

So they'll allow me hold parties in my compound without my neighbour calling the police on me?

MarvellousGod:
So they'll allow me hold parties in my compound without my neighbour calling the police on me?

Nigerians hold parties here. Mad parties but sometimes police do come over but yet d fun continues. D parties abroad is even more than d 1ce at home. And its crazy because no1 keeps tab on any1,its do what you want till you want it as long as d money is there and u dnt get into trouble

^^^^^.. Alright

tai2:


Yeah, I completely forgot about food. No peppersoup, no suya, no nkwobi.

shuoo.u prepare peper soup ursef naa

Reading... To comment later

thrash.

Is it the bad roads?
standard of living?
epileptic electricity supply?
clueless president?
kworopt politicians?
security?
healthcare?
unemployment?

etc etc... dont even dare to compare naija with Europe

we re talking about meaningful advantages, u re talking about loneliness, and freebies


just imagine

any forces that will try to stop you or discourage you from achieving that your dream of going to obodo oyibo I say holy ghooooooooooooooost.......

No place like home