How do men feel when they know the woman they are marrying has a dirty past? Is it ok for a lady to tell her man graphic details of her past? Should a man try to know? Twice I have had had women tell me their pasts (out of love I guess) and it wasn't easy living with it. Is it just me or do men generally feel same?

for me I'd say if your past has so much graphic details then it should stay in the past,no need bringing up ugly events...most times people want to know these things,but they really cannot handle what they end up finding out.

so if it isn't extremely necessary,forget your past and live in the present!

wife- yes,girlfriend- no..

if u wish to know, u r free

YES so he can decide whether to accept her or not.

I'm not interested in her past. I'm only interested in her present and future aspirations

Jacksparrow0712:
I'm not interested in her past. I'm only interested in her present and future aspirations

not knowing her past can come back to affect ur marriage.

Since I live in present, I'm really not bothered bout her past tbh. If her past comes hunting, then she'll have to pay for it

Captainswag225:
not knowing her past can come back to affect ur marriage.

Jacksparrow0712:
Since I live in present, I'm really not bothered bout her past tbh. If her past comes hunting, then she'll have to pay for it

lol, okay ur majesty.

I think if you can't handle the truth of her past you shouldn't bother to ask.

Live in the present.

It depends whether that past could affect their future

It would be unfair on him if you withhold info from him that you know will definitely affect him later on

Its difficult but if youre getting married you have to speak up

BUT you have to use your discretion. Some guys may use the info against you later on. So be careful with details and just know the kind of fellow he is

Don't need to go and blurt everything out with no filter; you are still a human being and you don't need to debase yourself for any reason, not even marriage

And you don't need to say anything unless the relationship is serious. Otherwise how many people will you end up telling?

Also you should seek spiritual counsel before all of that to make sure you handle it logically, without getting carried away and the guy shouldn't use it to manipulate you. Maybe seek spiritual counsel afterwards if the info is disturbing him

I would mention something about guys being honest about their pasts too but I know nobody cares so let me go and watch tv

Mmm well, all I can say is that if I'm dating a man, I want to know everything about him, including his past. As a matter of fact I'm angry at my hubby because he has lied to me by telling me a wrong number of women he's dated in the past. I think it is important to know who the person has been in the past, as much as who he/she is in the present. Just my opinion

zizman:


Twice I have had had women tell me their pasts (out of
love I guess) and it wasn't
easy living with it. Is it just me or do men generally feel
same?

Were you grateful for their honesty or did you wish they hadn't told you?

knowing her past is important.at least not too graphic details .girls with too graphic past hardly find man stay by their side long

If he is gonna love me then he should love me just the way I am regardless of what my past entails. And if not he should shut the door on his way out

















On a lighter note, it depends on what happened in the past, how bad was it?

Gurgle:
It depends whether that past could affect their future

It would be unfair on him if you withhold info from him that you know will definitely affect him later on

Its difficult but if youre getting married you have to speak up

BUT you have to use your discretion. Some guys may use the info against you later on. So be careful with details and just know the kind of fellow he is

Don't need to go and blurt everything out with no filter; you are still a human being and you don't need to debase yourself for any reason, not even marriage

And you don't need to say anything unless the relationship is serious. Otherwise how many people will you end up telling?

Also you should seek spiritual counsel before all of that to make sure you handle it logically, without getting carried away and the guy shouldn't use it to manipulate you. Maybe seek spiritual counsel afterwards if the info is disturbing him

I would mention something about guys being honest about their pasts too but I know nobody cares so let me go and watch tv

Mam u re so on point. If d past wud affect d future I shud be in d kn e. g U lost ur womb via an abortion, u murdered someone and u re on d run or ur ex is a friend i kn and am still friends with etc otherwise i dnt care hw many men u've slept with or hw many successful abortion u ve done... Wat matters most is d present and not d past.

I will like to know as much as I can..so I will be prepared for anything in the future,it is better she tells me naw..so we can settle it than when I hear it from third party,cos then even my late mum will not be able to settle the fight!!...I cherish honesty!!!!

That's why I settled down with a virgin. No reason to think of her past because there's actually nothing to know about her past. I became her past and present and future.

I think it's impossible not to share some things from your past with someone you're in a relationship with. However, there are things that I think one should take to the grave if they have nothing to do with the relationship or won't interfere with the relationship long term. How do you get off telling someone about your abortions & things of that nature? That's oversharing. It's none of their damn business what you did before them, UNLESS, it's something that might pop up in the future & jeopardise the relationship if you kept mum.

zizman:
How do men feel when they know the woman they are
marrying has a dirty past?
Is it ok for a lady to tell her man graphic details of her
past? Should a man try to know?
Twice I have had had women tell me their pasts (out of
love I guess) and it wasn't
easy living with it. Is it just me or do men generally feel
same?

if i luv her deeply i can easily waid it off any bad past, even if she was fu*k in my presence, but someone i dont like so much, or someone i married to only because of some reason. MEHN! dats a great escuse 4 me to log her out

The past should remain the past.No man can deal with a ladies past,it will only hurt the man s feeling.if he truly loves her,he won't bother about her past.

How Nigerian women think 101

http://www.stelladimokokorkus.com/2015/07/full-disclosure-in-relationships-yay-or.html?m=1

sebali:


Mam u re so on point. If d past wud affect d future I shud be in d kn e. g U lost ur womb via an abortion, u murdered someone and u re on d run or ur ex is a friend i kn and am still friends with etc otherwise i dnt care hw many men u've slept with or hw many successful abortion u ve done... Wat matters most is d present and not d past.

Yeah I think most of the time its not the actual incident that annoys people its just that they didn't tell the guy in time. Although it will be very difficult

yes!EVERY FACKIN DETAILS. . .

D man wan die young ni?? D

Good and bad. Good in d sense dat quick decisions to stay or leave r made and bad in d sense if d Man or d woman eventually finds out.

Me, I don't normally ask. But I have got no dirty past myself and I don't expect my partner to have.

Gurgle:


Yeah I think most of the time its not the actual incident that annoys people its just that they didn't tell the guy in time. Although it will be very difficult

Lik my boss wud say.... "Some things are better left unsaid"

sebali:


Lik my boss wud say.... "Some things are better left unsaid"

But the problem is what if somebody else says it for you