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Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? - Family - Nairaland

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Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by Nobody: 4:56pm On Sep 13, 2015
The average Nigerian babe cant wait to get married due to family, societal and peer pressures ( my friends are getting married). Even on thier wedding day the the joy is so evident on thier faces. But many women are unhappy and being used in the so called marriages. they take care of the House,kids while combining it with thier work/business. while the husband enjoys the whole service, in some cases still chasing fresh babes outside, some drop money for thier wife upkeep while some dont even drop expecting d wife to use her money. due to societal and parental pressures too some guys jst con a girl to marry to be seen as responsible while still living thier normal single lives but the lady gives up her life lol. there are lots of them like dat in my office, u see dem tired, worn out and depressed. but if this fair

5 Likes

Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by munchfani: 4:58pm On Sep 13, 2015
WORN OUT COS THEY HAVE BEEN SHAGGING SINCE THE AGE OF 14... FUVKIN SLAGS
Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by yomi007k(m): 5:03pm On Sep 13, 2015
Are u being forced to marry?


Wat about the side of the man who gives up his dream, his family and his freedom to take care of the woman and often times her family.

U see women that have done prostitution all of their lives screaming to get married. U see other women who are looking to escape poverty jumping into marriage with nothing to offer.

Most men r in too deep b4 their eyes open- hence they change.

10 Likes

Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by divinehand2003(m): 5:14pm On Sep 13, 2015
I have a feeling someone isn't enjoying his / her marriage. Marriage is meant to be enjoyed and not endured
Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by ArchEnemy(m): 5:17pm On Sep 13, 2015
The trouble is not marriage sometimes; it is marrying an irresponsible partner

9 Likes 1 Share

Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by SAMBARRY: 5:37pm On Sep 13, 2015
Well

12 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by Nobody: 5:38pm On Sep 13, 2015
All this talk about family pressure and wahala.... I've not seen any case o!
Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by Nobody: 5:42pm On Sep 13, 2015
In Nigeria, YES! Many women marry because they are expected to and because they are afraid of what people will say when they don't on time.
It is either poverty, greed or fear why many women marry, for example, absent husbands they barely know.

7 Likes

Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by cococandy(f): 6:11pm On Sep 13, 2015
Mindfulness:
In Nigeria, YES! Many women marry because they are expected to and because they are afraid of what people will say when they don't on time.
It is either poverty, greed or fear why many women marry, for example, absent husbands they barely know.

2 Likes

Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by cococandy(f): 6:15pm On Sep 13, 2015
Well for example, put up a picture of Genevieve or Rita Dominic and see how many comments that will revolve around them not being married.
If that's not pressure, I don't know what is.

Should they get married and the marriage isn't working. Regardless of who's at fault, they will be blamed for not being the perfect wives. They didn't protect their homes and let themselves go after childbirth thereby pushing the husband outside.

Whatever goes wrong, it's their fault.

Don't play the ostrich.
It's very real.

The pressure to get married and the pressure to make the marriage work is always concentrated on the women.
SirWere:
All this talk about family pressure and wahala.... I've not seen any case o!

16 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by Nobody: 6:21pm On Sep 13, 2015
cococandy:
Well for example, put up a picture of Genevieve or Rita Dominic and see how many comments that will revolve around them not being married.
If that's not pressure, I don't know what is.

Should they get married and the marriage isn't working. Regardless of who's at fault, they will be blamed for not being the perfect wives. They didn't protect their homes and let themselves go after childbirth thereby pushing the husband outside.

Whatever goes wrong, it's their fault.

Don't play the ostrich.
It's very real.

The pressure to get married and the pressure to make the marriage work is always concentrated on the women.
Meh, that's a lie! I dunno why women keep thinking like that. If a man passes the age of 30 and is not married, people begin to look at him in a certain way, like he is impotent and other ish like that! Even sef, shebi you will date before marriage. So why does this ish happen!
Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by cococandy(f): 6:23pm On Sep 13, 2015
SirWere:
Meh, that's a lie! I dunno why women keep thinking like that. If a man passes the age of 30 and is not married, people begin to look at him in a certain way, like he is impotent and other ish like that! Even sef, shebi you will date before marriage. So why does this ish happen!
Really?

5 Likes

Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by lilmax(m): 6:34pm On Sep 13, 2015
You cannot fool yourself from Age 24----27



Then cry family pressure @30


Nigerian men don't do old cargoes cool

5 Likes

Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by MzCorleone(f): 6:46pm On Sep 13, 2015
SirWere:
Meh, that's a lie! I dunno why women keep thinking like that. If a man passes the age of 30 and is not married, people begin to look at him in a certain way, like he is impotent and other ish like that! Even sef, shebi you will date before marriage. So why does this ish happen!
Oga stop exaggerating!! 30 fa?

People,do not care about the man,its the woman that takes the most hits. Atleast 28 and she's not married,all sorts of assumptions will be made.

5 Likes

Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by Nobody: 6:47pm On Sep 13, 2015
MzCorleone:

Oga stop exaggerating!! 30 fa?

People,do not care about the man,its the woman that takes the most hits. Atleast 28 and she's not married,all sorts of assumptions will be made.

Men are also pressured into marriage.

3 Likes

Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by MzCorleone(f): 6:59pm On Sep 13, 2015
Mindfulness:

Men are also pressured into marriage.
Honestly speaking, the pressure is more on the woman than the man.

6 Likes

Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by MzCorleone(f): 6:59pm On Sep 13, 2015
.
Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by KanwuliaJara: 7:02pm On Sep 13, 2015
I don't think this applies to Nollywood BABES o!
They get out of the marriage FASSSSSST N FURRRRRRIOUS!!!!!
Meaning? POVERTY NA BYTCH!!!!' grin

3 Likes

Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by Nobody: 7:02pm On Sep 13, 2015
MzCorleone:

Honestly speaking, the pressure is more on the woman than the man.

From your female perspective, yes.
Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by Nobody: 8:58pm On Sep 13, 2015
Mindfulness:


Men are also pressured into marriage.
not as much as the ladies

1 Like

Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by Stillfire: 1:07am On Sep 14, 2015
The guys are also pressured, but Nigerian girls are more desperate. grin
Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by Onegai(f): 5:29am On Sep 14, 2015
See, take it from someone who truly, honestly did NOT want to get married, I don't envy most Nigerian marriages. I've never seen such a large group of lonely and unhappy individuals connected by children, finances and social pressure in my life.

Most people don't know WHY they are getting married. Most people get married because "it's time, I want to settle down, I want children, my own place, money, etc". All idiotic reasons. You can do most of that while single.

Marriage is for companionship. Anyone can get pregnant for you, cook, put a ring on your finger, anyone can pay rent on an apartment you live in. But not everyone can make you feel alive, safe, warm, secure. That's why you should get married: because that person makes the world a little less painful and scary.

A lot of wives are sad in their marriages and are underappreciated and overwhelmed. A lot of husbands are lonely in their marriages (why else are they constantly jumping from side chick to side chick and beer parlour).

You're not supposed to be entering marriage, demanding from your spouse. If you're male and agreeing constantly to all these lists of "how to make your husband happy" you've failed even before you've met your future wife. If you're female and all you have in your mind is how you will flaunt your ring and your husband, whilst driving the jeep he bought you, you've failed even before you've met your future husband.

MARRIAGE AIN'T FOR SELFISH PEOPLE, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.

You're supposed to get married and put your spouse before you, male or female. I laugh when I see people quote the Bible to explain marriage (women are supposed to adore their husbands and respect him and men are supposed to die for their wives and put her needs before theirs. I'm yet to see that happen, I keep seeing falsely submissive angry women and insecure childish men).

If you're getting married because you want to benefit from being married, if you're getting married and all you're bringing to the table is a ring, a house, finances for her family, a baby for him, a typical naija wife (who apparently most NLers think is nothing more than a cook and a housekeeper who also sleeps with the man), in fact if you're bringing nothing tangible to the marriage except for being Mr and Mrs, abeg do us all a favour: stay single.

Don't let society pressure you into a life sentence or misery, boredom and loneliness. They're not happy, that's why they don't want you to be single and happy grin

28 Likes 12 Shares

Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by Nobody: 3:19pm On Sep 14, 2015
Onegai:
See, take it from someone who truly, honestly did NOT want to get married, I don't envy most Nigerian marriages. I've never seen such a large group of lonely and unhappy individuals connected by children, finances and social pressure in my life.

One of the best post I have ever read on Nairaland or any other forum. This is the real reason why I refuse to get married. Until I can confidently say that I can lay down my life for that person and hopefully he feels the same too, I prefer to remain single. If I don't meet that person in this lifetime, there is always another lifetime.

5 Likes

Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by Jamean(f): 3:38pm On Sep 14, 2015
munchfani:
WORN OUT COS THEY HAVE BEEN SHAGGING SINCE THE AGE OF 14... FUVKIN SLAGS

were they not shagged by men...or is it angels that shagged them

5 Likes

Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by Nobody: 3:45pm On Sep 14, 2015
munchfani:
WORN OUT COS THEY HAVE BEEN SHAGGING SINCE THE AGE OF 14... FUVKIN SLAGS
off point..

5 Likes

Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by raumdeuter: 4:18pm On Sep 14, 2015
cococandy:
Well for example, put up a picture of Genevieve or Rita Dominic and see how many comments that will revolve around them not being married.
If that's not pressure, I don't know what is.

Put up a picture of DBanj and Don Jazzy same thing would be said of them. So its not for females only

1 Like

Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by Jamean(f): 5:58pm On Sep 14, 2015
I was speaking with someone yesterday and she questioned when I was gonna get married...followed by..''isn't the guy ready''

My response...''So once a guy is ready to marry the lady too by defaults becomes ready? Doesn't the woman have a calendar plan and timing for her life, a time to marry and achieve other things Will you just marry and halt your life while the man continues with his old syllabus

He is ready doesn't mean I am, its either he waits till I am or we reach a compromise.

Also, oftentimes ladies subjects themselves to alot of trash in relationship just to be seen as wife material. I totally disagree that I have to do your laundry and cooking as an obligation just to make you see me as fit for marriage. Then the guy is just aloof feeling like Prince Akeem in Coming to America.

When a marriage is built on foundations like this, oftentimes it is difficult to obtain otherwise after wedding, afterall you have been up and doing...why do you suddenly need my input in home management et al.

Marriage is a means, not an end...as long as you and your partner are alive.

Women should endeavour to develop themselves and get a life so they won't become a douchbag when married.

8 Likes

Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by lilmax(m): 6:41pm On Sep 14, 2015
Jamean:
I was speaking with someone yesterday and she questioned when I was gonna get married...followed by..''isn't the guy ready''

My response...''So once a guy is ready to marry the lady too by defaults becomes ready? Doesn't the woman have a calendar plan and timing for her life, a time to marry and achieve other things Will you just marry and halt your life while the man continues with his old syllabus

He is ready doesn't mean I am, its either he waits till I am or we reach a compromise.

Also, oftentimes ladies subjects themselves to alot of trash in relationship just to be seen as wife material. I totally disagree that I have to do your laundry and cooking as an obligation just to make you see me as fit for marriage. Then the guy is just aloof feeling like Prince Akeem in Coming to America.

When a marriage is built on foundations like this, oftentimes it is difficult to obtain otherwise after wedding, afterall you have been up and doing...why do you suddenly need my input in home management et al.

Marriage is a means, not an end...as long as you and your partner are alive.

Women should endeavour to develop themselves and get a life so they won't become a douchbag when married.
why enter a relationship when you are not ready for marriage? I dont understand the development you are talking about,after school and working what other development do you want


And lastly, can you propose to a man when ready for marriage?

2 Likes

Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by tpiander: 6:44pm On Sep 14, 2015
who is conning who?

are men as desperate to marry as women?

save for the likes of el fruitomeno who has been begging women to propose to him, most men are not that senseless!

1 Like

Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by Jamean(f): 7:11pm On Sep 14, 2015
lilmax:
why enter a relationship when you are not ready for marriage? I don't understand the development you are talking about,after school and working what other development do you want




Not every dating relationship will lead to marriage..because there are no perfect systems. You may note that, even when some had marriage from the outset.

Talking about development, have you considered character development, adding professional certifications? or having a job and degree is the apogee of development, I beg to differ, it is just the bedrock.

6 Likes

Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by bomasek(m): 7:22pm On Sep 14, 2015
Jamean:


Not every dating relationship will lead to marriage..you may note that, even when some had marriage from the outset.

Talking about development, have you considered character development, adding professional certifications? or having a job and degree is the apogee of development, I beg to differ, it is just the bedrock.
U go give man tough time if person marry u
Re: Are Women Being Conned Into Marriage Nowadays??? by SAMBARRY: 7:27pm On Sep 14, 2015
Ooooooo this girl why do I just loff you so mush.you have nailed it. In fact oya use this and buy new designer clothes wink
cococandy:
Well for example, put up a picture of Genevieve or Rita Dominic and see how many comments that will revolve around them not being married.
If that's not pressure, I don't know what is.

Should they get married and the marriage isn't working. Regardless of who's at fault, they will be blamed for not being the perfect wives. They didn't protect their homes and let themselves go after childbirth thereby pushing the husband outside.

Whatever goes wrong, it's their fault.

Don't play the ostrich.
It's very real.

The pressure to get married and the pressure to make the marriage work is always concentrated on the women.

2 Likes 1 Share

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