cococandy:

;DFunny dude.
From his story, he doesn't want anything to do with the girl. From day one.
She was just a fling that pushed herself on him.
Yet he's surprised she kept the child from him.
Doesn't it make sense if she thought that he would reject the baby hence her not telling him.

Don't mind him. The topic already gave him away.

I'm usually wary of people that paint themselves as too good while others are devils.

@All
I think the OP has fire on his hands and is asking for help and not an analysis of his person or his error.
If someone does not have an advice or suggestion, not commenting on a topic is not a bad idea.
@OP
Take things easy. I think the babe is way beyond your league streetwise.
First things first! Do not discuss this with your Mum yet.
First thing, establish that the child is yours before getting yourself worried.
The chances are high the child is not yours, before you find yourself squatting on another guy's shit.
The babe's motive in keeping this info from you, if she was sure you are responsible is a very grey area.
Secondly, no matter what, do not accept any responsibility until you have proof the child is your own.
Now to a possible solution:
You mentioned you are in Europe and this can make it easy for you to get a DNA proof.
You may buy a DNA pack with service on ebay. You can get this for about 100 Euros.
Send it to her to collect the samples from the child's ear, mouth or a few stands of hair with the follicle.
She sends it back to you, then you send it to the lab, and they send the result straight to you.
"Trust but verify"
Do not assume or presume when you can know.
Do not allow yourself to be blackmailed emotionally or otherwise.
With proof the child is yours you can talk with your family and step up to the plate with respect to the child's welfare.

I got some link for the test kit with processing fees included:
http://www.ebay.ie/itm/DNA-Paternity-Test-/281800379341?hash=item419c9c8bcd
http://www.ebay.ie/itm/PRIVATE-DNA-PATERNITY-LAB-LABORATORY-TEST-KIT-99-99-ACCURACY-FATHER-CHILD-/220369462712?hash=item334f0b25b8

brocode:


If you gat your game up, you can get laid in less than 3hours of conversation. That doesnt mean u re bad, it means you are man enough. BAD would have been going one round at least when we got to our destinations before we part ways.

You even get mouth dey boast on top. Obviously you are a badt guy no doubt and maybe you have not learnt anything from this because you sound like even there in Europe you are still doing the same thing.

brocode:


A history of your topics and comments shows I dont require a response to this.

brocode:


If you gat your game up, you can get laid in less than 3hours of conversation. That doesnt mean u re bad, it means you are man enough. BAD would have been going one round at least when we got to our destinations before we part ways.

Lmao, is this the lie you people tell yourself? Mr. Man that is whoredom!
You've got 'game' and a girl used 'bitter cola' to trick you into pregnancy, rotflmao!

Excellent7:
@All
I think the OP has fire on his hands and is asking for help and not an analysis of his person or his error.
If someone does not have an advice or suggestion, not commenting on a topic is not a bad idea.
@OP
Take things easy. I think the babe is way beyond your league streetwise.
First things first! Do not discuss this with your Mum yet.
First thing, establish that the child is yours before getting yourself worried.
The chances are high the child is not yours, before you find yourself squatting on another guy's shit.
The babe's motive in keeping this info from you, if she was sure you are responsible is a very grey area.
Secondly, no matter what, do not accept any responsibility until you have proof the child is your own.
Now to a possible solution:
You mentioned you are in Europe and this can make it easy for you to get a DNA proof.
You may buy a DNA pack with service on ebay. You can get this for about 100 Euros.
Send it to her to collect the samples from the child's ear, mouth or a few stands of hair with the follicle.
She sends it back to you, then you send it to the lab, and they send the result straight to you.
"Trust but verify"
Do not assume or presume when you can know.
Do not allow yourself to be blackmailed emotionally or otherwise.
With proof the child is yours you can talk with your family and step up to the plate with respect to the child's welfare.

I got some link for the test kit with processing fees included:
http://www.ebay.ie/itm/DNA-Paternity-Test-/281800379341?hash=item419c9c8bcd
http://www.ebay.ie/itm/PRIVATE-DNA-PATERNITY-LAB-LABORATORY-TEST-KIT-99-99-ACCURACY-FATHER-CHILD-/220369462712?hash=item334f0b25b8

@Excellent7 Thanks alot. Am really glad about your response so am going to sound like a typical Nigerian: "May God bless you and anything you lay your hands on my friend. Holy Ghost Fire! on whoever go temper with your destiny" Its indeed a breath of fresh air to hear someone who understands and can read behind the expressions.

I will buy one, and I hope I can convince her to it. But I should or maybe get a friend back home that doesnt know my family at least involved.

Thanks again

@All the other shit heads here: Thanks anyways, I was expecting you all to respond. I cannot be what Dr. Carson called 'politically correct' for you all here. I know if you search deep in your hearts you would know and understand what am trying to say. I just laid it bear skin for you all and all you can do is pour your negativity on the situation just to make you feel good. You wont. I am old enough and financially capable by His grace of taking care of my baby.
If I was street enough to match all her capabilities I wouldnt probably be in this part of the world now. The idea of my story is for your input like @Excellent7, @5minsmadness ... had done and also so lessons are learnt. If I was on the other side, my take away from this story would be When things are crumbling around you, dont loss it and do the "Am going to do this and Damn the consequences, afterall everything else is falling apart anyways" kind of feeling because something beyond Good might be coming your way real soon. Lov yall

Mumu

brocode:
@All the other shit heads here: Thanks anyways, I was expecting you all to respond. I cannot be what Dr. Carson called 'politically correct' for you all here. I know if you search deep in your hearts you would know and understand what am trying to say. I just laid it bear skin for you all and all you can do is pour your negativity on the situation just to make you feel good. You wont. I am old enough and financially capable by His grace of taking care of my baby.
If I was street enough to match all her capabilities I wouldnt probably be in this part of the world now. The idea of my story is for your input like @Excellent7, @5minsmadness ... had done and also so lessons are learnt. If I was on the other side, my take away from this story would be When things are crumbling around you, dont loss it and do the "Am going to do this and Damn the consequences, afterall everything else is falling apart anyways" kind of feeling because something beyond Good might be coming your way real soon. Lov yall

5minsmadness:

cococandy:
Mumu

When I say the 'nigerian' god /husbands/wives etc.

It is like I am anti Nigerian or think the west are saints

This reminds me of that guy who slept with a prostitute and wants to preach to her.

The hypocrisy and denial is mind boggling.

It's the culture.
It breeds them self righteous and entitled.

You'll see prostitute guys calling their female colleagues-in-trade hoes as if something makes it okay for them to behave in such ways.

bukatyne:


When I say the 'nigerian' god /husbands/wives etc.

It is like I am anti Nigerian or think the west are saints

This reminds me of that guy who slept with a prostitute and wants to preach to her.

The hypocrisy and denial is mind boggling.

cococandy:
It's the culture.
It breeds them self righteous and entitled.

You'll see prostitute guys calling their female colleagues-in-trade hoes as if something makes it okay for them to behave in such ways.

It is amusing

Goodluck to them.

cococandy:
Mumu

Yeah am Mumu,

First statement:
Okay, first of all I know lots of people talk crap just to sound funny here. I get that, its good for the forum but this is a serious situation and am seeking real conversations and advice, possibly legal on this issue.
You are still commenting and...
Yeah am Mumu.

...took me from a nobody to a "fairly" recognised person across the atlantic.
Its called been humble, that is what happens to Mumu and...
Yeah am Mumu.

Read the whole story and all you can take is "This your topic title self"
Yeah am Mumu.

You wrote: [s]"From his story, he doesn't want anything to do with the girl. From day one.
She was just a fling that pushed herself on him.

Yet he's surprised she kept the child from him.
Doesn't it make sense if she thought that he would reject the baby hence her not telling him"[/s]

Everybody has something to offer yall. That is why am responding to you and that is why I kept in touch with my "fling" several months even when I know I dont want nothing but to motivate her to attain her personal goals and I wouldnt even be back for at least four years from when I left.
Yeah [s]"he would reject the baby"[/s]. Listen she was going to bring it up anyways someday when he was fixed and probably returned. You talk with somebody all the time and still refuse tell him you are with his baby for nine months of pregnancy and more for child birth and didnt until he mysteriously mentioned it and you got scared and had to say something. He didnt even have an input on his childs name and you are hoping on getting in a relationship with him in future. I believe you guys think alike... Yeah am Mumu.

Excellent7 wrote:
@All
I think the OP has fire on his hands and is asking for help and not an analysis of his person or his error.
If someone does not have an advice or suggestion, not commenting on a topic is not a bad idea.

And you(@cococandy) are still commenting... Yeah am Mumu.

Your topic "My Most Secret Thoughts" is simply laughable... but no am not judging. Yeah, am Mumu.

Checking you out, I noticed the only thing that excites you are negative comments. You got to check yourself out girl. You are still responding and Yeah, am Mumu!

Do you do anything but try to put others down. This is not the worst thing on earth and this guy who knows who he is and is a success story, instead of judging you thinks you deserve a response and Yeah he is Mumu for helping you with your(@cococandy and @bukatyne) negativities.

Lov yall and its the last am saying it for you two and Yeah, am Mumu.

Is this a poem?

brocode:


Yeah am Mumu,

First statement:
Okay, first of all I know lots of people talk crap just to sound funny here. I get that, its good for the forum but this is a serious situation and am seeking real conversations and advice, possibly legal on this issue.
You are still commenting and...
Yeah am Mumu.

...took me from a nobody to a "fairly" recognised person across the atlantic.
Its called been humble, that is what happens to Mumu and...
Yeah am Mumu.

Read the whole story and all you can take is "This your topic title self"
Yeah am Mumu.

You wrote: [s]"From his story, he doesn't want anything to do with the girl. From day one.
She was just a fling that pushed herself on him.

Yet he's surprised she kept the child from him.
Doesn't it make sense if she thought that he would reject the baby hence her not telling him"[/s]

Everybody has something to offer yall. That is why am responding to you and that is why I kept in touch with my "fling" several months even when I know I dont want nothing but to motivate her to attain her personal goals and I wouldnt even be back for at least four years from when I left.
Yeah [s]"he would reject the baby"[/s]. Listen she was going to bring it up anyways someday when he was fixed and probably returned. You talk with somebody all the time and still refuse tell him you are with his baby for nine months of pregnancy and more for child birth and didnt until he mysteriously mentioned it and you got scared and had to say something. He didnt even have an input on his childs name and you are hoping on getting in a relationship with him in future. I believe you guys think alike... Yeah am Mumu.

Excellent7 wrote:
@All
I think the OP has fire on his hands and is asking for help and not an analysis of his person or his error.
If someone does not have an advice or suggestion, not commenting on a topic is not a bad idea.

And you(@cococandy) are still commenting... Yeah am Mumu.

Your topic "My Most Secret Thoughts" is simply laughable... but no am not judging. Yeah, am Mumu.

Checking you out, I noticed the only thing that excites you are negative comments. You got to check yourself out girl. You are still responding and Yeah, am Mumu!

Do you do anything but try to put others down. This is not the worst thing on earth and this guy who knows who he is and is a success story, instead of judging you thinks you deserve a response and Yeah he is Mumu for helping you with your(@cococandy and @bukatyne) negativities.

Lov yall and its the last am saying it for you two and Yeah, am Mumu.

cococandy:
Is this a poem?

Poem: a piece of writing in which the expression of feelings and ideas is given intensity by particular attention to diction (sometimes involving rhyme), rhythm, and imagery.

I needed to make it sink in you dear. But am glad all you figure is "Is this a poem"
If it makes you feel better, yes it is

Lol. Go and siddan jare.

A word of advice though.
If you want to the DNA thing, don't send for samples from Nigeria.
Risk of contamination is high from collector and transporter. Possibility of a false result is high.
(That's if they will even allow the transport of such material across)

Go home and take the child to the clinic yourself so that your samples can be collected and handled by people trained to so.

brocode:


Poem: a piece of writing in which the expression of feelings and ideas is given intensity by particular attention to diction (sometimes involving rhyme), rhythm, and imagery.

I needed to make it sink in you dear. But am glad all you figure is "Is this a poem"
If it makes you feel better, yes it is

Buahahahahahaha! Chai! E pain am.

That is what you get when you want to play the self righteous game. You should have just told the story as it was and not with the "Good boy, bad girl" sentiment.

You were wrong for being involved with a 'bad' lady you knew you didn't want anything serious with, same way she was very wrong for not keeping you in the know as regards the pregnancy and the child.

Moving on. . . Please insist on a DNA before you get involved with that child. S/he just might not be yours.

This Op is a clown; good guy, wicked girl

She was worthy of 'straffing' and impregnation but isn't worthy of marriage..

Sorry, you're stuck ... This one no be chop and clean mouth

Go and take up your responsibility. ..

One thing with guys like this OP is that, they are usually very stup1d but claim to be sharp guys.

See mumu wey conclude say girl na runs babe but still fecked her unprotected yet she's the bad girl, even with all your levels and sophistication/goodness, na bitter kola decide your case, what a tool.

You better gather your life savings and send it to her for the upkeep of that child, nonsense.

freecocoa:
One thing with guys like this OP is that, they are usually very stup1d but claim to be sharp guys.

See mumu wey conclude say girl na runs babe but still fecked her unprotected yet she's the bad girl, even with all your levels and sophistication/goodness, na bitter kola decide your case, what a tool.

You better gather your life savings and send it to her for the upkeep of that child, nonsense.

Yes he may be all u say he is

But one question

Who is carrying the pregnancy?

pickabeau1:



Yes he may be all u say he is

But one question

Who is carrying the pregnancy?

I know you aren't expecting an answer to that question.

freecocoa:
I know you aren't expecting an answer to that question.

It's a question..you can decide to answer

Until we acknowledge the reality that sluttery carries different consequences both socially and physically on the genders..all the vexation and hot air here will still continue

pickabeau1:


It's a question..you can decide to answer

Until we acknowledge the reality that sluttery carries different consequences both socially and physically on the genders..all the vexation and hot air here will still continue

The question is very unnecessary as I don't see what that has to do with my post, did you read anywhere in it, that the lady is consequence free?

I don't care what people decide
to be as long as they aren't hurting others with their actions, the OP is only getting what he's getting here because he called the girl "bad" and himself "good", what makes him feel he's better than the lady, when they are in it together?

freecocoa:
The question is very unnecessary as I don't see what that has to do with my post, did you read anywhere in it, that the lady is consequence free?

I don't care what people decide
to be as long as they aren't hurting others with their actions, the OP is only getting what he's getting here because he called the girl "bad" and himself "good", what makes him feel he's better than the lady, when they are in it together?

Did u read my post


Social consequences
Two people do the same thing

One is called a player, the other a ho

Guess which gender

pickabeau1:



Did u read my post


Social consequences
Two people do the same thing

One is called a player, the other a ho

Guess which gender

Abeg excuse me laugh.

I can't imagine how a lady you attested to be engaged in runs, who must have several men sleeping with her before you met her and after you have had sex with her could have a baby and you are here on nairaland acting as someone who just recorded an achievement in child production. To me from all I could bring out from your story, you are desperate and indirectly begging the lady to identify you as the father of the boy. First, the lady did not open up to you about her pregnancy even when you noticed she denied it, the lady did not inform you when she put to bed, you only found out when you asked her about it after a long a time of no communication, with all these you are jumping to conclusion to be the father of the baby. Guy you are CHEAP. Beside what made you a nice guy and the lady a bad girl? I don't like when people run down others to overestimate themselves.

JannahGem:

and who's fault is that?

Let me guess.
That's how nature made it

It's not because of the hypocrisy and discrimination against women ingrained in the people I.e society's skin?

Anyway don't worry about the girl per consequences. She clearly wanted the baby. So it's not a consequence. She got what she wanted.

Obviously the OP is the one suffering the consequences now.

Instead of you people to encourage young men to be repsonsible too as you always harp on women, you're here telling us that's society.
As if society is made up of Angels from heaven.

pickabeau1:



Did u read my post


Social consequences
Two people do the same thing

One is called a player, the other a ho

Guess which gender

brocode:
@All the other shit heads here: Thanks anyways, I was expecting you all to respond. I cannot be what Dr. Carson called 'politically correct' for you all here. I know if you search deep in your hearts you would know and understand what am trying to say. I just laid it bear skin for you all and all you can do is pour your negativity on the situation just to make you feel good. You wont. I am old enough and financially capable by His grace of taking care of my baby.
If I was street enough to match all her capabilities I wouldnt probably be in this part of the world now. The idea of my story is for your input like @Excellent7, @5minsmadness ... had done and also so lessons are learnt. If I was on the other side, my take away from this story would be When things are crumbling around you, dont loss it and do the "Am going to do this and Damn the consequences, afterall everything else is falling apart anyways" kind of feeling because something beyond Good might be coming your way real soon. Lov yall

Why do you keep explaining though?

cococandy:
and who's fault is that?

Let me guess.
That's how mature made it

It's not because of the hypocrisy and discrimination against women ingrained in the people I.e society's skin?

Anyway don't worry about the girl per consequences. She clearly wanted the baby. So it's not a consequence. She got what she wanted.

Obviously the OP is the one suffering the consequences now.

Instead of you people to encourage young men to be repsonsible too as you always harp on women, you're here telling us that's society.
As if society is made up Angels from heaven.

All these rants on top simple issue

Society actually did make sure young men are responsible by making it almost impossible to sleep with a woman outside marriage
The alternative was räpe which had serious consequences

Modernisation led to the license the have nowadays

crackhaus:

Why do you keep explaining though?

He's new.

5minsmadness:

He's new.

No wonder...