@op I have a similar experience
Whil growing up I didn't really have a close relationship with my elder sister,I was closer to my brother.
With time the gap widened between us especially as I got into my teenage years, I always felt she was different and judgemental so I maintained my Distance.
She noticed it later and started coming close to me. She made me her friend, and we started understanding each other better. Now despite the age difference we are like 5 and 6

It is not a hard thing. Make your sister's friends your friends. Be her friend. Make her comfortable with you. Know what she likes. Be open to her. Get her stuffs. Go out together. There is nothing like having a bond with your sibling. Cheers

Thought am the only one facing this problem.
I can even spend two days with my elder sister without having up to 15 words with her.

I feel free when with her friends than she, even when we never had any misunderstanding.

It is normal. It could be her own way of showing respect to you. I have close relationship with my immediate elder brother to the extent that my friends are his and his friends are mine too. But our eldest brothers are so far away from me that I don't know their line of businesses.

NEED A BLOG REALLY BAD THEN SEE IF IT MEETS YOUR REQUIREMENTS https://www.nairaland.com/2819461/buy-adsense-ready-resposive-theme

All is well

I need help on this issue too,though i don't stay with my younger sister,she rarely discuss issues with me only when asking fpr money even on whatsapp i always HI her first

Blood thick pass water....[b][/b]

Start by showing interest on how she is doing academically, then build other interest with her

breadandtea:
Hello everyone, this issue has been bothering me for a while now, so I decided to speak up here because I know I would get good 'advises' from people here.

I come from a family of 3 girls (our only brother died when he was less than one), I'm the Eldest (22), the next is 19 and the last is 16. We stay with our parents in Lagos.
I was very close with my immediate younger sister, I still remember many fun times we had together. But our relationship started drifting apart during our secondary school period, we started talking less. I remember I reacted harshly towards her when she used a little of my N100 I was storing for midnight call and things even got worse from that moment.
She joined me in UNIPORT, and we were staying together off-campus. Some times, we barely say more than 50 words to each other in a day, she prefers to gist with our neighbors.

Whenever I see other siblings in my compound, I know something is not just right! We don't even gist normal girly stuffs like boyfriends, makeup, dresses & co, and it really bothers me. We barely even quarrel, I think for the past 3-4 years, we've only quarreled 2 or 3 times.
Though we are both close to our youngest sister.

So please advise me on what to do. Thanks.

some stuff are best kept that way!

LEAVE it that way.

Ok I am a younger sister. Let me tell you from my perspective if it will help you. Me and my sister have different personalities. She's very carefree and I seem to care a lot. I am constantly cleaning up and covering for her, for things that she knows and doesn't know.
We were very close till everything I tell her enters another person's ear. But regardless she knows I can kill for her. Though I don't think she can.

You may be the problem. Maybe you put a block around you expecting your sister to worship and respect everything about you. You do not respect her or are sympathetic to her needs. When people grow older they become more of friends than uncle and Aunty. Except you prefer your age mates outside your family to be closer to you, than your siblings.
The problem may be that you have abused trust at a point in time when that sibling needed you badly. Call them, apologize and get off your high horse to talk to them more like a friend. Also be very diplomatic and learn to keep their secrets to yourself, till they give you the permission not to.

gurunlocker:
can I bring butter to add to your breadandtea


well you are the elder here, just try and talk to her, ask her what is going through her mind and use your mature mind to reconcile and talk better.

and this will be the major problem!

Chould be her junior sister is mature than her due to the way she perceive things.

I have two(younger) also.... they both used to complain I didn't like and have time for them....
So I made up my mind I'll be their best friend.... it took a while sha... but that's was the best thing I've done that I'm happy about. A whole lot of letting go of precious personal effects helped tho. Calls, gifts, etc.


I'm way Older than they are but I always buy trumi(12yards) of material and make it for 3 of us... you need to see how happy they always are wearing aso ebi with their aunt *lol... but it worked sha....
I spent money sha, and I'm still spending.... so long as they are happy, I am too

Fabrolistic:
Thought am the only one facing this problem.
I can even spend two days with my elder sister without having up to 15 words with her.

I feel free when with her friends than she, even when we never had any misunderstanding.

We are on the same shoes... But mine is brothers

that's y am always filled with happiness ,

No younger sister

breadandtea:
Hello everyone, this issue has been bothering me for a while now, so I decided to speak up here because I know I would get good 'advises' from people here.

I come from a family of 3 girls (our only brother died when he was less than one), I'm the Eldest (22), the next is 19 and the last is 16. We stay with our parents in Lagos.
I was very close with my immediate younger sister, I still remember many fun times we had together. But our relationship started drifting apart during our secondary school period, we started talking less. I remember I reacted harshly towards her when she used a little of my N100 I was storing for midnight call and things even got worse from that moment.
She joined me in UNIPORT, and we were staying together off-campus. Some times, we barely say more than 50 words to each other in a day, she prefers to gist with our neighbors.

Whenever I see other siblings in my compound, I know something is not just right! We don't even gist normal girly stuffs like boyfriends, makeup, dresses & co, and it really bothers me. We barely even quarrel, I think for the past 3-4 years, we've only quarreled 2 or 3 times.
Though we are both close to our youngest sister.

So please advise me on what to do. Thanks.

communication is a two way thing! She simply doesnt talk to u because u dont talk to her anymore..

.

ratchy:
that's y am always filled with happiness ,

No younger sister

lmao.... I know the feeling

Maybe you wear the big sis logo to often...my younger sis and I have always been 5 and 6. She's 18months younger but everyone start out thinking she's older cos she's bigger and better behaved than me. I sometimes call her mommy sef cos when that girl begin to lawyer me as if she was the chairperson at my chtistianing, me sef dey confuse....but she's my best friend of all time. My back is always covered on her watch...why not? We've been through too much together to forget the same blood that flows in our veins. Mind, we have our own little wars o, but nothing beats our relationship. Thank God she's my baby sis...


Now draw yours closer...you need them, if not now then later. The onus is all on you sweetie.

I promise u @OP I won't say Endtime siblings

Have a heart to heart talk with her .Seems she is afraid of you now

why do you want to have a close relationship with your younger sister? are you H.o.r.n.y?

D@ mins she doesn't c u as a friend. Probably u don't have common interests-but if u do, keep ur ayg one syd(until it is needed) and deal wit ha lyk a friend

to me am also a first born in my family, sometimes is like that but is your duty to call her and ask her if u offend her anywhere that d way your relationship is is just right. and try to let her understand y is nt good to continue in that way. Dis my advice

A lot has been said on this already, but I feel inclined to chip in that u shouldn't always act like a big sister. Yes. Sometimes, u should condescend to her level. Relate with her like u're age mates, the way she'd relate with her friends. Don't be too conscious of urself, such that u keep reminding urself at every point in time that u're the older one.

Be more concerned about her affairs... In a caring way, that doesn't seem offensive or overbearing. Go out of ur way to do little things for her. I have two younger sisters and a younger brother. The age gap is far enough. But we relate very well. There are times I scold them surely, but they never hold it against me, because of the closely knit cordial relationship we've built over the years.




N. B. U've got to be consistent with this. Don't give up on her all too soon if she isn't being immediately cooperative.

Girls

you should be her sister first before been her friend u get it :-Xyou should be her sister first before been her friend u get it

It is bad and not right.. I remember my dad died so early but thank God for love in our family... We sent ourselves to school.. I worked to pay for my elder bro fees and now he's ready to pay for my master.... What if something bad happened... When u rili need ur sis... Stop been childish... Pls do bring back love cause you might cry for it later

end time relationship..

end time family

Lolz one has introverted personality the other doesn't. I had this same issue with my elder brother when we lived together my introverted personal was just a mess

damwise:
It is bad and not right.. I remember my dad died so early but thank God for love in our family... We sent ourselves to school.. I worked to pay for my elder bro fees and now he's ready to pay for my master.... What if something bad happened... When u rili need ur sis... Stop been childish... Pls do bring back love cause you might cry for it later

You don't get it. Believe me they will kill for each other when something wrong happens it's just that the sisterly flow isn't there.

It's common among immediate siblings.

misspicy:
I need help on this issue too,though i don't stay with my younger sister,she rarely discuss issues with me only when asking fpr money even on whatsapp i always HI her first

Okun o Iye