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Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? - Family - Nairaland

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Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by deeptesting(m): 8:11pm On Dec 26, 2015
It is no longer news to hear about couples going their separate ways today,immediately after separation or divorce most father`s cut off all ties with their ex including the children, it really beats my imagination why most men also divorce their children.

Most men quickly move into another relationship abandoning the children for the woman, they don`t call, visit or even write letters to the children. We have witnessed few cases here on Nairaland where the children now grown ups put up pictures of their fathers taken 30yrs ago in search of the man who gave birth to them..

Real men don't divorce their kids too.

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by Miami11: 8:25pm On Dec 26, 2015
Because they are mean and selfish

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by agabaI23(m): 8:53pm On Dec 26, 2015
No, it is because most times, the women don't want them to be part of the children's lives but they will want them to be financilly involved fully. I doubt there is a father that will abandon his children because he is divorced.

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by shegxi(m): 9:36pm On Dec 26, 2015
i think it depends, some men are nt even rili responsible when togeda nt to talk of wen seperated or divorced. also, some men take out d anger on d children which is nt rite.

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by ronald4lif(m): 10:24pm On Dec 26, 2015
Some divorcee women are vile, ferocious and seek to torment the life of their ex partner employing their kids as a snare to exploit the men. When men notice this they retract from their responsibility which ultimately result to less parental access to their kids by their mothers.

I'm not holding brief for anyone but a sizeable number of divorcee women are heartless and usually bitter even in some cases where the separation was perceived to be consensual between both couple.

There's absolutely no divorcee male I know whose ex wife doesn't devise means to callously deal with them using their kids. There seem to be this notion that they were rejected, used and dumped which fuels resentment and bitterness.

In the UK, they'd use bogus child support claims to render your life useless till you start drifting from your fatherly responsibility. Don't ever believe the men just decided to abandon their responsibility until you have a full grasp of what is truly happening.

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by cococandy(f): 11:37pm On Dec 26, 2015
.

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by avicky(f): 8:05am On Dec 27, 2015
agabaI23:
No it is because most times, the women don't want them to be part of the children's lives but they will want them to be financilly involved fully. I doubt there is a father that will abandon his children because he is divorced.
That's not true. I have seen a father who abandoned his son after separation. The wife wants him to be involved in the son's life but he wouldn't budge. School fees, feeding, health has been the responsibility of the struggling mother.
Look, so many irresponsible fathers out there. Two sane adults should not bring their kids into the fracas between them.
So I don't buy your assertion.

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by avicky(f): 8:07am On Dec 27, 2015
cococandy:
This.

And this
They will just comment as if they have carried out a survey.
Do you know how many women are longing for their exes to be part of their kids' life?

And no matter what happens, children will always look for the abandoned parent. That's the annoying part for me.

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by agabaI23(m): 8:25am On Dec 27, 2015
avicky:

That's not true. I have seen a father who abandoned his son after separation. The wife wants him to be involved in the son's life but he wouldn't budge. School fees, feeding, health has been the responsibility of the struggling mother.
Look, so many irresponsible fathers out there. Two sane adults should not bring their kids into the fracas between them.
So I don't buy your assertion.
You have seen A father. One father doing that does not make a majority. The women foolishly do that as a way of punishing the father.

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by omogin(f): 8:38am On Dec 27, 2015
avicky:

That's not true. I have seen a father who abandoned his son after separation. The wife wants him to be involved in the son's life but he wouldn't budge. School fees, feeding, health has been the responsibility of the struggling mother.
Look, so many irresponsible fathers out there. Two sane adults should not bring their kids into the fracas between them.
So I don't buy your assertion.
You sound like you are speaking from experience, lol...every case can't be same so you can't just say 'that's not true'

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by avicky(f): 8:51am On Dec 27, 2015
omogin:

You sound like you are speaking from experience, lol...every case can't be same so you can't just say 'that's not true'
Oh really? So must every example or experience be personal?

I said it's not true because no fact to back it up.

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by avicky(f): 8:57am On Dec 27, 2015
agabaI23:
You have seen A father. One father doing that does not make a majority. The women foolishly do that as a way of punishing the father.
But not all women nau. Or do you have the statistics?

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by agabaI23(m): 9:01am On Dec 27, 2015
avicky:

But not all women nau. Or do you have the statistics?
Most women do.

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by avicky(f): 9:02am On Dec 27, 2015
agabaI23:
Most women do.
Most not all. Same applies to men.

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by agabaI23(m): 9:10am On Dec 27, 2015
avicky:

Most not all. Same applies to men.
No, if you accept that most women do, then you have accepted that small number of men do. Thank me

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by avicky(f): 9:14am On Dec 27, 2015
agabaI23:
No, if you accept that most women do, then you have accepted that small number of men do. Thank me
Definitely grin

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by agabaI23(m): 9:19am On Dec 27, 2015
avicky:

Definitely grin
Merry Christmas
Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by avicky(f): 9:24am On Dec 27, 2015
agabaI23:
Merry Christmas
Hmmm. Thanks but today is 27th o.
Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by agabaI23(m): 9:25am On Dec 27, 2015
avicky:

Hmmm. Thanks but today is 27th o.
Yea, we are still celebrating so its not new yet. OK happy 27th

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by avicky(f): 9:28am On Dec 27, 2015
agabaI23:
Yea, we are still celebrating so its not new yet. OK happy 27th
E se o.
Pls don't derail the thread.
Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by agabaI23(m): 9:30am On Dec 27, 2015
avicky:

E se o.
Pls don't derail the thread.
Haaa, police

I had no such thing in mind except you're planning to..
Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by Moana(f): 10:25am On Dec 27, 2015
agabaI23:
No it is because most times, the women don't want them to be part of the children's lives but they will want them to be financilly involved fully. I doubt there is a father that will abandon his children because he is divorced.
they are million cases like that in the present world we are living in, what are you talking about?

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by agabaI23(m): 10:37am On Dec 27, 2015
Moana:
they are million cases like that in the present world we are living in, what are you talking about?
Million what? In your mind? If I ask you to mention 5 you will struggle to do that even with the internet but just looking around reveal so many females with such issues. Even in Nigeria where women are not accorded the level of worship they get in the West.

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by Moana(f): 11:46am On Dec 27, 2015
agabaI23:
Million what? In your mind? If I ask you to mention 5 you will struggle to do that even with the internet but just looking around reveal so many females with such issues. Even in Nigeria where women are not accorded the level of worship they get in the West.
i have 3 cousins with children whose fathers refused to take care of and they even use their mother's surnames and over 7 people i stayed in hostel with that were single mothers with no support from their fathers undecided are you satisfied with double the number?

Nigerian women are worshipped and how many of these worshipped women are being used for rituals and human trafficking. The number of rape and physical abuse cases on NL alone are alarming. Child marriage is a sign of women being worshipped abi? Okay continue

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by agabaI23(m): 11:56am On Dec 27, 2015
Moana:
i have 3 cousins with children whose fathers refused to take care of and they even use their mother's surnames and over 7 people i stayed in hostel with that were single mothers with no support from their fathers undecided are you satisfied with double the number?

Nigerian women are worshipped and how many of these worshipped women are being used for rituals and human trafficking. The number of rape and physical abuse cases on NL alone are alarming. Child marriage is a sign of women being worshipped abi? Okay continue
Hun, I didn't say Nigerian women are worshipped. Read again!

If you have 3 cousins with similar problems hmmm. The 7, are they single mothers because of divorce or because of premarital sex? We are talking about the former not the latter. There could be lots of arguments about paternity. Most cases the kids involved with the pregnancy are fun seekers who would swear with their pubic hair they never knew you.

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by Moana(f): 6:16pm On Dec 27, 2015
agabaI23:
Hun, I didn't say Nigerian women are worshipped. Read again!

If you have 3 cousins with similar problems hmmm. The 7, are they single mothers because of divorce or because of premarital sex? We are talking about the former not the latter. There could be lots of arguments about paternity. Most cases the kids involved with the pregnancy are fun seekers who would swear with their pubic hair they never knew you.
married or unmarried how does that cancel paternity? undecided Even is they are extra-marital children, it has never for a second excluded a father from taking care of his child. There are 3cases where they were married and the fathers still did not live up to their responsibilities. Your relationship with your babymama or lack thereof should never for a second affect your responsibilities towards your child or children.

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by agabaI23(m): 6:19pm On Dec 27, 2015
Moana:
married or unmarried how does that cancel paternity? undecided
The scenarios are different ...and
You
Know
That

The title of the thread said ....after divorce

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by Moana(f): 7:35pm On Dec 27, 2015
agabaI23:
The scenarios are different ...and
You
Know
That

The title of the thread said ....after divorce
go to the maintenance court closest to you this week and see if you will not find at least 10cases of men who neglect their children after divorce and you will know its something frequent.

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by Nobody: 7:43pm On Dec 27, 2015
because a divorced woman is angry and vile. Some of them try to turn the back of the kids against their daddy by saying all sort of bad things about him, no matter how hard the man try to be a responsible father, the kids would not appreciate it. Men know this and that is why they dnt indulge themselves. Not all dads tho.

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by agabaI23(m): 7:43pm On Dec 27, 2015
Moana:
go to the maintenance court closest to you this week and see if you will not find at least 10cases of men who neglect their children after divorce and you will know its something frequent.
You should take me to one tongue

And you should wait to hear from the men why?

Remember that those cases will also include those who are willing and has been doing the needful who probably has fallen on Buhari time at present and bad times at other times.

The woman would happily let the court know he is no longer paying

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by Moana(f): 7:48pm On Dec 27, 2015
agabaI23:
You should take me to one tongue

And you should wait to hear from the men why?

Remember that those cases will also include those who are willing and has been doing the needful who probably has fallen on Buhari time at present and bad times at other times.

The woman would happily let the court know he is no longer paying
excuses as usual

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Re: Why Do Men Drift From Responsibility To Their Children After Divorce? by NiceJenny(f): 7:54pm On Dec 27, 2015
Only useless men does that. Real men dnt

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