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My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? - Romance (2) - Nairaland

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Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by Dandeson1(m): 4:25pm On Jan 31, 2016
.
Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by tooman: 4:25pm On Jan 31, 2016
Na love
Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by cutetopsey(f): 4:25pm On Jan 31, 2016
ok
Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by Nobody: 4:26pm On Jan 31, 2016
[s]
Estharfabian:
shocked First off....
You made three Very fatuous Mistakes.

First off..You Went into A Relationship with someone You do not Have feelings for. that is Very wrong. And kinda slutty...

Secondly, It's not always advisable to let a guy Spend way too much for yah..It'll fuels their ego and uh look? You're kinda paying for it! Plus-it's a Bit Gold-diggy-like...sad

Thirdly, You just had to be inna Relationship with someone with a puerile mentality!grin
It's Your decision And Your right to Quit A relationship if You don't wanna be innit anymore...No one wants a babydaddy!undecided
And Most especially NOT one that doesn't even care about his own Child......What a douchebag!angry

Just Call his bluff...He's just hurt. I guess?
[/s]


Mrs cutehector undecided
Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by Flexherbal(m): 4:29pm On Jan 31, 2016
Pray about it.
Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by Seun360(m): 4:29pm On Jan 31, 2016
Don't marry him, that dream was a sign.

2 Likes

Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by siegfried99(m): 4:31pm On Jan 31, 2016
vicraven:
You dont love him,yet you want to marry him cos hes paying your school fees??
are you okay??
just tell me if you're ok,cos it might not be your fault.
are you sick??
do you have lassa fever??
later we'll hear of divorce,this and that..
infact.gerrarahia,getout! before sango descends on you


Lwkm grin grin

As in ehn

Nothing we no go see for nairaland

You don't love him, but u pretend to love him so that he can keep giving u money grin

@op, Marriage cannot be used as compensation..just call him to apologize and beg for forgiveness that he has just been scammed grin
Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by busomma: 4:32pm On Jan 31, 2016
What kind stupid question is this? Go and marry her now. Ode.
Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by Misselocon(f): 4:34pm On Jan 31, 2016
There are some people with really good heads on their necks here today....sweet brains. .lools. Enof gud answers to pick from @Op. #advice#gals shd be kiaful of what dey receive from guys...cud be a problem later.
Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by Malakh: 4:35pm On Jan 31, 2016
why you so self-centered, what does having a child by another woman means he doesn't love you, some of you women can be really dumb, haven't you heard of concubines
Simplestone:
Please my fellow Nairalanders,Am very depressed,I have a man who I have known for 8years,we were friends and started dating 4years ago,although the relationship was a distance one,cause I school in Ogun state,while He reside in delta state,He practically does everything for me including paying my school fees,He is a very caring man,we have agreed to get married this year 2016,Although I don't love him,but I never wanted to be an ingrate to him,and I believe since we are friends that the love will eventually come.
Last year June I had a dream,and I saw a woman and a child crying in front of him, while He kept on pushing them away,I was worried so I asked him if there is any secret He is hiding from me,that I already know, but I wanted to hear from Him,that was when He told me that He got a woman pregnant by mistake in 2013 ,that He does not love the girl,and He has even refuse to see her since she gave birth.
I was depressed and I felt betrayed I stopped picking his calls for Two weeks,and the next thing He did was to rush down to my elder sister and told her everything we have shared in the relationship,and even threatened to deal with me if I don't marry Him,He boasted about all He has done for me,including paying my school fees and all that.

I am truly confused,I need serious advise, please no insults. Thanks.
Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by Ishilove: 4:35pm On Jan 31, 2016
daretodiffer:


You have a right to be angry.

He did a lot for you financially, you have to appreciate him for that but you do not have to throw away your life or live in misery because of it.

The fact that he is hanging it on your neck before marriage means he is definitely going to abuse you emotionally after marriage.


Whichever way you choose, we do not have his own side of the story and I hope you are not saying this to get out of the contract.
@bolded, you just hit the nail on the head.

@Simplestone, this man will remind you for the rest of your life how he sponsored you through school, how he lifted you out of nothing and how therefore so you owe him your life.

Sister Simplestone, the God, who is a revealer of all secrets, the same God who showed you that he has a child for someone else will make a way. Just pray well for a direction because it will be a very big mistake marrying someone who can abandon his child. Will be be acting this way if you were the one who cheated on him and got pregnant?

2 Likes

Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by kinibigdeal(m): 4:36pm On Jan 31, 2016
Simplestone:
Please my fellow Nairalanders,Am very depressed,I have a man who I have known for 8years,we were friends and started dating 4years ago,although the relationship was a distance one,cause I school in Ogun state,while He reside in delta state,He practically does everything for me including paying my school fees,He is a very caring man,we have agreed to get married this year 2016,Although I don't love him,but I never wanted to be an ingrate to him,and I believe since we are friends that the love will eventually come.
Last year June I had a dream,and I saw a woman and a child crying in front of him, while He kept on pushing them away,I was worried so I asked him if there is any secret He is hiding from me,that I already know, but I wanted to hear from Him,that was when He told me that He got a woman pregnant by mistake in 2013 ,that He does not love the girl,and He has even refuse to see her since she gave birth.
I was depressed and I felt betrayed I stopped picking his calls for Two weeks,and the next thing He did was to rush down to my elder sister and told her everything we have shared in the relationship,and even threatened to deal with me if I don't marry Him,He boasted about all He has done for me,including paying my school fees and all that.

I am truly confused,I need serious advise, please no insults. Thanks.

listen to yourself again "i dont love him" is my fiance"...so what the heck is your problem? You want to die because of someone you aint in love with
Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by M4gunners: 4:37pm On Jan 31, 2016
You don't love him,but you let him sponsor your education. God is watching you. As of him gotten another girl pregnant, is a mistake that normally happened in long distance relationship.
Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by Lexusgs430: 4:37pm On Jan 31, 2016
Simplestone:
Please my fellow Nairalanders,Am very depressed,I have a man who I have known for 8years,we were friends and started dating 4years ago,although the relationship was a distance one,cause I school in Ogun state,while He reside in delta state,He practically does everything for me including paying my school fees,He is a very caring man,we have agreed to get married this year 2016,Although I don't love him,but I never wanted to be an ingrate to him,and I believe since we are friends that the love will eventually come.
Last year June I had a dream,and I saw a woman and a child crying in front of him, while He kept on pushing them away,I was worried so I asked him if there is any secret He is hiding from me,that I already know, but I wanted to hear from Him,that was when He told me that He got a woman pregnant by mistake in 2013 ,that He does not love the girl,and He has even refuse to see her since she gave birth.
I was depressed and I felt betrayed I stopped picking his calls for Two weeks,and the next thing He did was to rush down to my elder sister and told her everything we have shared in the relationship,and even threatened to deal with me if I don't marry Him,He boasted about all He has done for me,including paying my school fees and all that.

I am truly confused,I need serious advise, please no insults. Thanks.

You do not love him, you have known him for 8 years, and still the love has not arrived yet?
When is this elusive love from you going to arrive?
It seems all you love is the financial shower on your head.
If love has not arrived in 8 years, the possibility of it arriving is NIL!!!!

1 Like

Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by ninjatoyta87: 4:38pm On Jan 31, 2016
Ur own don finish,if u know wetin better 4 uy find all I'm money give am, he will cop u raw
Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by akpur1(m): 4:38pm On Jan 31, 2016
cruzita:
instead of begging u he is threatening u on top of his mistakes .he is RAVING MAD
You No well at all. When the money was coming you girls love eat not knowing what some one passes through to make this cash
Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by Niyinficient(m): 4:39pm On Jan 31, 2016
tolugar:
If he loves you, he won't be keeping records of the things he has done for you.

He has no remorse and can't repent so should not be trusted.

Calculate your school fees en pay him bak.

Unless you want to marry him out of pity or because he is threatening you.




Na small case.

Could such a sense be found in Nairaland?

U get sense my broda!
Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by akpur1(m): 4:39pm On Jan 31, 2016
cruzita:
instead of begging u he is threatening u on top of his mistakes .he is RAVING MAD
you no weell at all
Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by adeniyisamuel59(m): 4:40pm On Jan 31, 2016
Estharfabian:
shocked First off....
You made three Very fatuous Mistakes.

First off..You Went into A Relationship with someone You do not Have feelings for. that is Very wrong. And kinda slutty...

Secondly, It's not always advisable to let a guy Spend way too much for yah..It'll fuels their ego and uh look? You're kinda paying for it! Plus-it's a Bit Gold-diggy-like...sad

Thirdly, You just had to be inna Relationship with someone with a puerile mentality!grin
It's Your decision And Your right to Quit A relationship if You don't wanna be innit anymore...No one wants a babydaddy!undecided
And Most especially NOT one that doesn't even care about his own Child......What a douchebag!angry

Just Call his bluff...He's just hurt. I guess?
Your submission has just reminded me of a guy that killed his fiancee because she refused to marry him after the many years of rigor to sponsor her in school...though I am not saying this to scare her, she should follow her mind.
Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by wristbangle: 4:41pm On Jan 31, 2016
OP, I honestly don't have a cogent advice for you because you saw the writing on the wall but you still went ahead to enjoy all the financial benefits from him without maintaining your stance from the beginning you don't love him and clarify that statement for him

Common for crying out loud, can't you do a legitimate occupation and earn a living out of it?

You can't marry that man because it's obvious he will maltreat you in your marriage.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by Nobody: 4:42pm On Jan 31, 2016
adeniyisamuel59:
Your submission has just reminded me of a guy that killed his fiancee because she refused to marry him after the many years of rigor to sponsor her in school...though I am not saying this to scare her, she should follow her mind.
Well, that is just sick!!!




She wouldn't willingly Date a mad man now, would she?shocked


2 Likes

Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by malele(m): 4:42pm On Jan 31, 2016
Simplestone:
Please my fellow Nairalanders,Am very depressed,I have a man who I have known for 8years,we were friends and started dating 4years ago,although the relationship was a distance one,cause I school in Ogun state,while He reside in delta state,He practically does everything for me including paying my school fees,He is a very caring man,we have agreed to get married this year 2016,Although I don't love him,but I never wanted to be an ingrate to him,and I believe since we are friends that the love will eventually come.
Last year June I had a dream,and I saw a woman and a child crying in front of him, while He kept on pushing them away,I was worried so I asked him if there is any secret He is hiding from me,that I already know, but I wanted to hear from Him,that was when He told me that He got a woman pregnant by mistake in 2013 ,that He does not love the girl,and He has even refuse to see her since she gave birth.
I was depressed and I felt betrayed I stopped picking his calls for Two weeks,and the next thing He did was to rush down to my elder sister and told her everything we have shared in the relationship,and even threatened to deal with me if I don't marry Him,He boasted about all He has done for me,including paying my school fees and all that.

I am truly confused,I need serious advise, please no insults. Thanks.

I don't have problem with him impregnating another girl, we're the problem is his threaten u. That kind of man will abuse u in marriage
LEAVE THAT MAD MAN FAST.
But if he is a spiritualist ur life might be in danger. If u got money pay him back. But pls don't marry that mad man

1 Like

Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by Cutehector(m): 4:43pm On Jan 31, 2016
adeniyisamuel59:
Your submission has just reminded me of a guy that killed his fiancee because she refused to marry him after the many years of rigor to sponsor her in school...though I am not saying this to scare her, she should follow her mind.
Samuel, oh cmon, can't u do smth for someone without expecting smth in return?

Why do people especially men keep makin d same kind of mistakes such as this.
Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by sweetemmy(m): 4:45pm On Jan 31, 2016
my Sister... I understand u stand is not easy @ all. go back to God for Direction and instruction. Ask God to show u if his ur hubby or not... but stay out of sin...sxxxxxxx. may God help U. Amen.
Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by Daniel058(m): 4:48pm On Jan 31, 2016
I'm that last idiot That would ever sponsor a lady I'm not married to go University... #never!!!




Taa!!!!!
Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by Swissheart(f): 4:49pm On Jan 31, 2016
The problem is not with the guy oh but you!. .. ... You have bn collecting his money and giving him false hope. It is now that you know he has a child, coincidentally after seeing you through school that you know you don't love him. Anyways, your conscience will do better. For him too, if he could desert his own child and be at peace, he must be very irresponsible
Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by Acidosis(m): 4:49pm On Jan 31, 2016
God loves you so much for revealing his secrets to you. Its a big lesson to some fraudsters who assume dreams aren't real. I believe in dreams and it has worked for me virtually in all my decision-making process right from childhood. You really need to thank God my sister, devote your time in prayers and show appreciation.


About your man, do a simple mathematics. Calculate all he has spent on you. Put it in writing and pray about it. If you truly want to leave the relationship, find a means to refund his money, before you move on.


You sound like a good girl with a good heart. The problem with people like you (however) who have spent years (in your case 8 years) with a man is the difficulty in truly moving on.

I believe you will find a better man but the man will face hell with you as you'd always show PITY towards your man whom you have spent 8 years with. Nevertheless, nothing is difficult to achieve. Personally I run from ladies like you. But I believe a better man will come your way if truly you're sincere with yourself.

1 Like

Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by sukkot: 4:52pm On Jan 31, 2016
Simplestone:
Please my fellow Nairalanders,Am very depressed,I have a man who I have known for 8years,we were friends and started dating 4years ago,although the relationship was a distance one,cause I school in Ogun state,while He reside in delta state,He practically does everything for me including paying my school fees,He is a very caring man,we have agreed to get married this year 2016,Although I don't love him, but I never wanted to be an ingrate to him,and I believe since we are friends that the love will eventually come.
Last year June I had a dream,and I saw a woman and a child crying in front of him, while He kept on pushing them away,I was worried so I asked him if there is any secret He is hiding from me,that I already know, but I wanted to hear from Him,that was when He told me that He got a woman pregnant by mistake in 2013 ,that He does not love the girl,and He has even refuse to see her since she gave birth.
I was depressed and I felt betrayed I stopped picking his calls for Two weeks,and the next thing He did was to rush down to my elder sister and told her everything we have shared in the relationship,and even threatened to deal with me if I don't marry Him,He boasted about all He has done for me,including paying my school fees and all that.

I am truly confused,I need serious advise, please no insults. Thanks.
well this is an easy one. you said you dont love him. so whats the problem ?
Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by Sanguine77(m): 4:52pm On Jan 31, 2016
Simplestone:
Please my fellow Nairalanders,Am very depressed,I have a man who I have known for 8years,we were friends and started dating 4years ago,although the relationship was a distance one,cause I school in Ogun state,while He reside in delta state,He practically does everything for me including paying my school fees,He is a very caring man,we have agreed to get married this year 2016,Although I don't love him,but I never wanted to be an ingrate to him,and I believe since we are friends that the love will eventually come.
Last year June I had a dream,and I saw a woman and a child crying in front of him, while He kept on pushing them away,I was worried so I asked him if there is any secret He is hiding from me,that I already know, but I wanted to hear from Him,that was when He told me that He got a woman pregnant by mistake in 2013 ,that He does not love the girl,and He has even refuse to see her since she gave birth.
I was depressed and I felt betrayed I stopped picking his calls for Two weeks,and the next thing He did was to rush down to my elder sister and told her everything we have shared in the relationship,and even threatened to deal with me if I don't marry Him,He boasted about all He has done for me,including paying my school fees and all that.

I am truly confused,I need serious advise, please no insults. Thanks.
if you leave him, be ready for the worst. You should not have allowed him to spend on you if you never loved him.
I have seen 3 cases where a man who spent on a girl arranged some guys to kill both the girl and her new lover because she refused to marry the man who sponsored her.
Truth be told, you have eaten your cake and its either you marry him with his baggage or you refund all he spent cos right now in Nigeria, there are no free meals and if you doubt me, ask Dasuki and co.
Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by dammytosh: 4:53pm On Jan 31, 2016
You don't love him so what are you waiting for
Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by MzPynQ: 4:55pm On Jan 31, 2016
It's truly a man's world... If this story was the other way round, I don't think I will be reading some of these comments.
Re: My Fiance Cheated And Has A Child. What Do I Do? by RVBC: 4:57pm On Jan 31, 2016
You had a dream or u went to a native doctor Well that aside, I will advice you don't marry this guy! Stand on your ground on how disapointed you are, for him not just cheating on you but having a child... And since you don't love him this is an opportunity to flee, but becareful so he won't hurt you nd probably take your life.

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