modath:

Girlloom,

Nor vex ooo, like @ bigfido, you lost me at the part where you stepped to your MIL.... MILs & FILs are special, no matter how much they "ask" for it, we should never allow the devil use us.!!!!!

What would have happened if she had slapped you?

girlloom:
I totally agree with you, I am not proud of what I did and I knelt down afterwards to beg my MIL, not once. I was going through a lot and snapped. There is really no excuse for bad behavior. As for the SIL, her behavior towards me started way back before the issue with her mom.

Iphie26:



my dear, Forsyth will be a longer distance from where I ll be staying in Georgia . My sis in law told me the traffic can be mad. I just dey pity myself as I'm going with a toddler. Please this uber app and taxi who knows how it works should eeducate me Biko.

girlloom:
Hello all, please I need help.
Okay, I understand ssn should be delivered to the address provided 2 weeks or so after birth. It happened that I didn't receive my son's as at a month afterwards so I felt it actually got missing and was going to request for another. I also mentioned this to my host and they agreed it was probably missing and I should forget about it as there was no need need for the number. At 7 weeks after, I decided to apply for his passport and there was a part on the application form where they requested for ssn, so I told my host that I would be going to the social security office to request for a new one. He then asked to see where the number was requested on the form so I showed him. Surprisingly, my host told me I shouldn't bother that the ss card would be delivered that day and he was very certain. At 8pm that day, he handed me my son's card lnot looking new with no envelope and his ssn exposed. Why would he open a mail that was clearly addressed to my son? I couldn't even say anything because he is my sis inlaw's husband and don't want to come across as rude. Now I suspect my son's card has been used fraudulently for tax claims. Please is it possible to block the number from being used? May I add that my host is now suddenly over protective of his mailbox. I believe there are letters he is receiving that he doesn't want me to see.

nefertitiram:


A part of me believes this story o....

these gbomo gbomo people have new new strategy. If you check am, she has never exhibited this behaviour. But we gotta still investigate d matter

justwise:


Tax is filled after financial year which is from April 5th so i don't think he has used it yet

Iwanawana:


This kain rubbish dey vex me I swear! If na me today today I don leave that house! What rubbish!!! Even if I have just one day left thier is nothing that would make me not to leave that house. In as much as I understand that mummies want to minimize cost in this our American dream journey,please if you can, respect your heavily pregnant self and find urself even if na 'face me I face you'(which I am certain it will still be better than Naija self contained in a bq in a posh location) somewhere close.
Staying with relatives no matter how close u both seem to be, one day one day una must crash somehow and it's usually from the so called host bcuz they always believe they are doing you a favour. That's how I stayed with my 'Immidiate younger sister' and her family in one 'abroad country' not US. Even as I paid half of the rent and paid electricity and water bill just bcuz I don't want any insult from her as she's a baby sis. We still crashed a day before I left for Naija with my twins and a niece and we didn't speak to each other for more than a year. Everyone including mumsy was against her attitude she later apologised and I learnt my lesson also.

So people, while saving for hospital bills, also try save for accomodation please so that you can go and have ur baby jejeli, have ur privacy and farth as loud as you feel like in ur own space without any nonetity feeling very important make ur life and that of ur lo miserable.
I rest my case.

LadyGuinivere:
Enizo of all the opinions so far. I align with urs 99percent. (The 1 percent na Minus the swear word )
I sincerely don't get it when men cannot be a Cover to their wives.

justwise:
[b]

Ok.

She needs to find out first if he has used it and a way to block it.

I still maintain my point against reporting him to the authority and possibly getting a criminal record because family is involved here

worry359:


Is this where the arguments about mother or wife ruling a house start?

vamum:
Wow!!! Just caught up on all the drama. from stolen funds to stolen SSN. It is well!

Now that i have the full context of your story girlloom, I will advice that you still go ahead and report the case to SSA and possibly IRS if the SSN was used for tax purposes. There's so much evil that can be done with one's SSN that you don't want your child involved. I watch all these Judge Judy cases and you see some children are still paying back after so many years of their parents messing up their records.

If you are cash strapped, make peace with your SIL and get out of the house as soon as possible.

Advise to people coming to the US try and get your own space. If you must stay with someone make sure both parties are in total agreement and you both understand the commitment it involves. Especially when it comes to in laws, make sure the invitation is coming from them and not husband volunteering on their behalf. Different characters, different backgrounds and upbringing, different country, etc. Be respectful of each other and their homes and help out as you can. Not nice for ppl to call other peoples homes "cabin" they opened up their homes to you. There have been too many horror stories of Hosts being TERRIBLE as well as the hosted being TERRIBLE.


@ LeakyTribe I'm a little convinced with her story. Same thing happened to my grandma, she went to the market (nobody sent her o! cos she had a help). they followed her home, she gave them all her jewelry (even the ones she had forgotten where she hid them due to old age).

Please investigate, and not sure about you keeping her in your home while that is going on. Please be careful with that before more evils happen. God will replenish you.

Enizo:


My dear I will blame you and you husband for what has befallen you.
I cant imagine my wife's age mate asking my wife to call her aunty and I will concur to that.
Secondly your husband needs to show that you matter in his life because if he puts his foot down on the issue they would have Long taken shape.

The mad woman invaded you privacy and your husband asked you to apologise you came in to birth and they started stressing you and your husband kept mute.

I am not the bravest person out there but for my wife that I took an oath to protect I will ensure we quarell o.

But why will you stay that long my wife cant even bear to stay in Yankee for long na 4months is too much even you at some point will start to get upset.

Please don't inform them of irs just flag the ssn secretly so that God can punish them.

If they crawl close to using it.
But in all be strong because this issue hasn't ended they will still come at you.

Hian 34 yr old wants to be addressed as aunty. F**king lunatics

biollar1:

Apparently they had their ill motives all along.

Please thread carefully as advised here cos Yorubas say: "na the beginning of Fyt person dey know...no one knows how it will end"

Report it and have it changed asap or dealt with by the appropriate channel(s). They kept feeding you with the sole aim of getting it all back via ur LO's SSN.

I just learnt something new that it's not mandatory nor compulsory to apply for the SSN, since I don't intend renting an accomodation, I will just let it be for now. I also advise others da intend to stay with relatives to :

1. do once a week/ once in two weeks grocery shopping for the entire house.

2. Go with lots of foodstuff from Naija, garri, crayfish and the likes.

3. Once in a while... Opt to pay while u all eat out.

4. Chip in convos that states u ain't suffering back home.

Please be careful dear, it's even worse dat ur husband isnt reacting, cos it's very conspicuous da he's trying to avoid issues.

All the best and do thread carefully.

jemin456:
Pls i wld like to know the processing time it takes for an ETC to be ready......then any agent's name ? Or how does one go about it.....i am currently in lousiana...wld appreciate any1s response.....tx a bunch

jemin456:
Pls i wld like to know the processing time it takes for an ETC to be ready......then any agent's name ? Or how does one go about it.....i am currently in lousiana...wld appreciate any1s response.....tx a bunch

bepop:
Please i need advice on this. I am off for my missionary journey in few days. I intend to travel with 5k and want to go with my master card and print account statement in the sum of like 1.4 million in case i am being questioned on how much i have at the POE. the challenge i have is the money is not yet in my account but hubby wants to transfer it to my account. my passport bear different name with my husband because i got it before i was married. May there be any issue of who transferred such huge amount to my account few days to my trip if they discovered a lump sum was transferred or i need not worry about the bank statement but just the account balance? Thank please advise.

Miracletwinee:
Bia, girlloom everybody has been on this your issue since yesterday a part of me says I should advice you not to post an update on this platform anymore. You never can tell who is reading this thread and your descriptions are too vivid it's very easy to guess who you are. I think people have given you enough sincere and matured advice it's now left for you to do the needful. Somebody can know somebody that knows somebody that knows your SIL. Pls don't compound your problems you have enough to deal with already and besides its you marriage we are talking about here. Abeg e don do oooo.Come back home and warm yourself back into your DH heart.

Miracletwinee:
Bia, girlloom everybody has been on this your issue since yesterday a part of me says I should advice you not to post an update on this platform anymore. You never can tell who is reading this thread and your descriptions are too vivid it's very easy to guess who you are. I think people have given you enough sincere and matured advice it's now left for you to do the needful. Somebody can know somebody that knows somebody that knows your SIL. Pls don't compound your problems you have enough to deal with already and besides its you marriage we are talking about here. Abeg e don do oooo.Come back home and warm yourself back into your DH heart.

donugapi:


Very true.. My wife stayed with her family for nearly 4 months... her family were so nice.. They even gave us their car to use plus gas money sometimes sef. They bought so many gifts for our baby and gave her plenty money.. before we left we opened an account for her with nearly $2k in there.

Some people naturally just have bad attitudes.

bigfido:
@girloom the moment I read that you exchanged words with your MIL, a chunk of the sympathy I had left. Yoruba people say, ile oko, ile eko ni (your matrimonial home is where you learn good behaviour).. I might sound terrible to you right now, but imagine your younger brothers wife exchanging words with your mother under your roof.. Would you hug her and take her to dinner afterwards? As a woman, you have to learn patience. Not every war is won by confrontations. Some are won by silence. Yes, it hurts, but knowing when to speak at times saves nine. I am sure you know your husband and from the little I have read, his family is important to him than his wife. The moment a man threatens you with divorce, you need to start evaluating your worth to that man and most importantly, what values the man attach to his home. At that point, you should have learnt how to thread carefully. Your SIL might have attitude and as such it might be killing you.. You could have easily evaluated your position and know how to chose your battles wisely. Silence is golden especially for a woman.

I think now, you should let your family know what you are going through, if they can raise cash for you, great! Pack your bags and leave that house. If your husband calls to divorce you because you sort for your own sanity, give him a clap on the phone and let him do as he pleases. To me, all is not fair with such threats in a marriage.