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Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by Nobody: 3:42pm On Mar 28, 2016 |
I confided in my husband when he accused me of listening to people. I then opened up and gave him an instance that if i listen to people i would ne doing what they asked me to do.I told him the advice a former neigbhour of his gave me. Of which I told her I can't do such. Now he uses it against me. I feel bad because he didn't even say what I told him exactly. He changed the story. He lied about it. My husband goes about telling everyone i am diabolic because I jokingly told him that he should be grateful I don't have a wicked heart if not I will use magun to catch him and his mistress. Which he even replied that he knows i dont have that mind. That i am still a child. this was said around march of 2015 Fastward to November he started asking for a divorce because he of his mistress he met online. Telling both his colleagues and family members that I am diabolic which is not true. I feel bad because this same man have also confided in me telling me things about his boss and others. We are currently separated I just regret everything. I regret confinding in him and opening up to him. With pleas from everywhere, he is still insisting on divorce. 7 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by Vision4God: 4:10pm On Mar 28, 2016 |
Watch ur words, let dem b more encouraging to ur husband. pray more for him, and bcareful hu u listen n talk to(so called friends) 34 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by jmichlins(m): 4:21pm On Mar 28, 2016 |
He does not deserve you. You are worth more much to be cheated on so let him go 159 Likes 15 Shares |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by postmann: 4:32pm On Mar 28, 2016 |
@OP, Your msg isn't so detailed but I should point out that you probably were wrong to have discussed your husband and marital issues with your neighbour and kept the so called advice to yourself until the day you had a misunderstanding with your husband. Naturally, he would wonder if there's more you've kept away from him. That's coupled with the fact that you just gave him a crude shock that you discussed him with your neighbour. This is not to excuse his unfaithfulness. What's your creed? Muslim? Christian? I'd advice you pray seriously. Divorce is no joke. 39 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by JonTal: 4:41pm On Mar 28, 2016 |
postmann: |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by Nobody: 5:24pm On Mar 28, 2016 |
postmann: I am christain. I wasn't discussing marital issues with her. I was trying to conceive then. So I met her for advice on her she conceived her after 5years of marriage. That's how it went. He is really serious with the divorce. I don't want the divorce. I have begged him for another chance to change where I wronged him. But he has bluntly refused. 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by GodnGold: 5:40pm On Mar 28, 2016 |
It is a pity dear.
It is advisable to keep somethings to oneself even in marriage. Learn from this,you were wrong in what you said. The bible will tell you more about 'the heart of man' Move on. 15 Likes |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by postmann: 5:53pm On Mar 28, 2016 |
cionon:Forgive my misconception. Since you're christian you'd be familiar with what I'll have to say. It's a battle of the knees. Men may cheat, but are less likely to leave home over a mistress. Most women who are intentionally home breakers can be diabolic. I'm not saying that this is your case but you'll need prayers. If you are involved in a church, seek a prayer group and let them join hands with you. I'll also advice you keep yourself sexually pure through out this travail, so that when it's all over, there would have been no stain of regret and guilt niggling over your conscience. Good luck! 141 Likes 5 Shares |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by Nobody: 5:57pm On Mar 28, 2016 |
Vision4God: Ok I get u. What happens to when a woman is emotionally down? Is her husband not supposed to uplift her by giving word of advice instead of kicking for divorce? Why are then now a couple if one cannot be her strength when she is weak? Should it be the woman duty alone to be the strength I her husband in weakness? 26 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by Nobody: 5:59pm On Mar 28, 2016 |
GodnGold: Okay |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by Nobody: 5:59pm On Mar 28, 2016 |
postmann: Tnx for d advice 4 Likes |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by TheArchangel(f): 6:02pm On Mar 28, 2016 |
cionon:He is not asking for divorce because of what you listed rather he is asking because you are yet to conceive and he is using that as an excuse. He even have a mistress... ![]() Get yourself checked out medically and get treated and allow him to wallow in his mess. Move on while you are young. No amount of begging will douse an already made up mind. 110 Likes 9 Shares |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by enoqueen: 6:20pm On Mar 28, 2016 |
Let him go. If there is anyway u can take revenge on him by disclosing what he had said about people, expose him. Marriage has taught me not to ever trust my husband with words. 15 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by pet4ril(f): 6:51pm On Mar 28, 2016 |
Just pray for him...... There's power in our tongues and I believe the devil interpreted what you told him in a bad way and he's using it to poison his mind. Go on your knees and talk to the master of the marriage and especially if you didn't collect him from somebody, no one can collect him from you... Good luck 7 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by pet4ril(f): 6:54pm On Mar 28, 2016 |
enoqueen:its not enough for her to have a broken home 3 Likes |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by raumdeuter: 6:56pm On Mar 28, 2016 |
cionon: How did you wrong him? 10 Likes |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by Nobody: 7:09pm On Mar 28, 2016 |
Op and her estranged husband has an history. So you still went ahead to get married to this same guy notwithstanding all the red flags. Facts is, they never change. Pele. 7 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by Nobody: 7:33pm On Mar 28, 2016 |
Madam. I checked ur previous threads if those threads are d real situation about u then i think u av been forcing urself on this Man right from engagement. Such is life though. However ur fervent prayer is d best thing for d now. meanwhile que sera sera.. 6 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by Nobody: 7:46pm On Mar 28, 2016 |
God help both of you 2 Likes |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by austine4real(m): 7:59pm On Mar 28, 2016 |
Mayb u shud stop beggin him& giving d attention wll kip his ego up do as if he doesn't exist. B prayerful cos this mistress mght be a diabolic person 4 Likes |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by tipwill(m): 9:53pm On Mar 28, 2016 |
God is your strength in all these. |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by Nobody: 10:08pm On Mar 28, 2016 |
raumdeuter: He said we quarell alot and that's one of the reason He wants to end the marriage 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by Nobody: 10:11pm On Mar 28, 2016 |
pet4ril: Yeah my mistake was ibeing careless with words. I should have kept things to my self. |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by SexyStrawberry(f): 12:31am On Mar 29, 2016 |
cionon: Divorce is no joke especially if there's a child involved, it ruins the child's life, still plead and see if he'll change, this should teach u a very big lesson never to confide in anyone no matter who he/she is to u, though I'm not married, I've learned mine in a hard way as well and I'm still repenting for it. 1 Like |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by PinketteDawn: 5:09am On Mar 29, 2016 |
SexyStrawberry: Sometimes you really need to confide in someone. There is no need to die in silence for something that could've easily been resolved if you had opened up. Any way, I can assure you that divorce does not ruin a child's life in all cases. In fact, if half of the men we have in our societies were brought up by single mothers, away from abusive fathers and surrounded by love and care, then we would have better individuals/marriages today. Yes, divorce is tough, but it is always a better option especially when children are involved. A child's mental and psychological state can be greatly affected if s(he) is growing in an environment where s(he) constantly witnesses different forms of abuse and degradation on one parent by the other. Some men you see today who beat up their wives, abuse them verbally, financially, sexually and even cheat on them, grew up in an environment where such acts were tolerated so they don't even see anything wrong if they do the same to their wives in their own marriages. There is no way you can try to explain to man who thinks that a woman is beneath him and she should obey every word he says because her sole existence is to please him, that this notion is wrong especially if he grew up in a home where he was constantly seeing his father treat his mother with such notion and she was there tolerating it so that divorce would not ruin her child. Hello! The child is already ruined by being exposed and allowed to grow with that mentality. 30 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by byvan03: 6:36am On Mar 29, 2016 |
Opening up to him isn't why he is serving you divorce papers. He has checked out on you and there is nothing you can do about it. How can you be begging helplessly for love and acceptance? if you succeed with begging, he will make your life hell. Being served a divorce is not the end of the world, no one died. Pick up what is left of your dignity and woman up or you can continue begging. A man with a mistress is a ticking time bomb, if he doesn't divorce you today,he will eventually. 57 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by zeb04(f): 7:41am On Mar 29, 2016 |
how do you beg for love you didn't learn anything while growing up? 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by cococandy(f): 8:19am On Mar 29, 2016 |
You're begging someone who's cheating on you? ![]() 25 Likes |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by mostyg(m): 9:06am On Mar 29, 2016 |
Why cant I beg for love? Is love the only reason we marry? What of financial security? What of family prestige? @op. You have already revealed too much about your family on nairaland going by all your previous threads. I guess you talk a lot and much about your family matters to strangers(neighbours) 6 Likes |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by Nobody: 9:09am On Mar 29, 2016 |
mostyg: I come hear cos it's a faceless forum instead of going to friends who will broadcast my issue. I come for advice. And for all. I didn't marry my boyfriend whom I wrote about before. My husband was a friend before he asked me to marry him 9 Likes |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by Arsenate(m): 9:41am On Mar 29, 2016 |
PinketteDawn:yeah, pretty cool and easy for you to just sit there and say divorce is a better option because you grew up with both your parents. Asked the kids who grew up in a broken home and they will tell you it's not such a pleasant experience. Adults should fuucccking work out their differences. Divorce is shiiiiit. 14 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Was I Wrong Opening Up To My Husband? by Jaygrl(f): 10:51am On Mar 29, 2016 |
cionon:Have you seen the movie War Room? If you haven't please buy that movie and watch today. 10 Likes 1 Share |
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