PinketteDawn:


Excuse me dear. You don't know me from Adam. How can you be so sure I grew up with both of my parents? Did you grow up in a home where your father was constantly degrading your mother? Ask people who have been in that situation and compaRe. Issues are only sorted out when both parties want to. It is not right for a woman to be constantly begging her husband to marry her. Is he doing her a favour? You can never beg anybody to marry you that is reality! If his heart is somewhere else, then let him go.You can beg someone to forgive you if you have wronged him but if he chooses not to forgive, you cannot beg him to love you. True love should not be begged for. How long will you keep begging? For the rest of your life?

If only op will see it this way.

Vikky014:
so you are her husband

hmmmmm what more can I say

jmichlins:
He does not deserve you. You are worth more much to be cheated on so let him go

Ur such a bad man. Ur advising a married woman to let her husband go rather than advising her to use her words wisely, Na u wan marry her later?

I really don't understand what was written up there..my advice is you pray,some home wreckers aren't coming with ordinary hands.

Do you mind if I ask how old you are and how long was your marriage beefier the separation?

Your age, to determine if the fight is what it and the duration of your marriage if decisions are too early to make.

What's your relationship with his family? His mum, dad siblings, if he has any and what's his relationship with your family?

With these questions, I can share my thoughts; not necessarily advise.

Be mindful however that there's no one way to resolve marital issues. What works for me might not work for you even in extremely similar circumstances.

All you'll get here may or may not work as no one knows exactly what the situation is but you.

When push comes to shove, you'll have to take your own decisions and face the consequences.

Let's talk sis.

cionon:


He said we quarell alot and that's one of the reason He wants to end the marriage

Madam!, if u don't want to end ur marriage jst kindly leave all the advice nairalanders are giving you cos most of us here are single and ignorant of what marriage looks like.

Go to ur pastor and look for a good counsellor besides ur pastor to seek advice frm.

You can save your marriage by a singular act.

Divorce has it's stigma.

You gave him the perfect excuse to use to divorce you. Next time you hear such stories outside, ensure you let people know they are all lies and proceed to tell them the truth about him. If he doesn't stop, get a lawyer and sue him for defamation of character. Make sure you milk him to nothing in the suit. Then we shall know if mistress will remain after he loses it all. Move on lady, hard as it is. But this guy is a mad man. You are free, enjoy it and choose more carefully next time.

Am so sorry dear...inu jin if not a koba ri ikun asebi...just ask God for divine direction..note;not all advise given on this forum yu must follow...the lord ll be with you,i ll remember you in my supplication

Never you open up to a man whether husband/boyfriend. Tell him what he wants to hear cos they don't reason like women and some can't handle issues .

EDIPO:
Do you mind if I ask how old you are and how long was your marriage beefier the separation?

Your age, to determine if the fight is what it and the duration of your marriage if decisions are too early to make.

What's your relationship with his family? His mum, dad siblings, if he has any and what's his relationship with your family?

With these questions, I can share my thoughts; not necessarily advise.

Be mindful however that there's no one way to resolve marital issues. What works for me might not work for you even in extremely similar circumstances.

All you'll get here may or may not work as no one knows exactly what the situation is but you.

When push comes to shove, you'll have to take your own decisions and face the consequences.

Let's talk sis.

I am 27 . The marriage is just 2 years .the relationship with his mum was smooth until recently. Things just turned around

PinketteDawn:


Excuse me dear. You don't know me from Adam. How can you be so sure I grew up with both of my parents? Did you grow up in a home where your father was constantly degrading your mother? Ask people who have been in that situation and compaRe. Issues are only sorted out when both parties want to. It is not right for a woman to be constantly begging her husband to marry her. Is he doing her a favour? You can never beg anybody to marry you that is reality! If his heart is somewhere else, then let him go.You can beg someone to forgive you if you have wronged him but if he chooses not to forgive, you cannot beg him to love you. True love should not be begged for. How long will you keep begging? For the rest of your life?

Only sturbon ppl think this way.
Virtuous women build their homes.

Advice her to always apply wisdon in her word rather than using them carelessly.
Secondly, let her be making use of her kneels for God cuz it seems she doesn't pray.

cionon:
I confided in my husband when he accused me of listening to people. I then opened up and gave him an instance that if i listen to people i would ne doing what they asked me to do.I told him the advice a former neigbhour of his gave me. Of which I told her I can't do such. Now he uses it against me. I feel bad because he didn't even say what I told him exactly. He changed the story. He lied about it.


My husband goes about telling everyone i am diabolic because I jokingly told him that he should be grateful I don't have a wicked heart if not I will use magun to catch him and his mistress. Which he even replied that he knows i dont have that mind. That i am still a child.
this was said around march of 2015

Fastward to November he started asking for a divorce because he of his mistress he met online. Telling both his colleagues and family members that I am diabolic which is not true. I feel bad because this same man have also confided in me telling me things about his boss and others. We are currently separated

I just regret everything. I regret confinding in him and opening up to him. With pleas from everywhere, he is still insisting on divorce.

There are some words best left unsaid.

Op,are you a believer? If yes, then go on your kneels.

Dem never born that mistress well, just do few prayer points on her head with few midnight vigils, your hubby will be back.

Use the PUSH strategy. Pray Until Something Happens. Prayer is the key. Remember that there are prayer, and there are prayer.

Na my 2kobo be that o, as I no get cent.

I Declare to you on this last night of the month of march 2016 "I cancel any form of divorce btw you and your Hubby in the Name of Jesus. I also Decree and Declare that The GOD of Heaven, The Ocean divider turns your husband against his mistress and also turn the mistress against him in the Name of Jesus. Btw the 1st of April and the 14th of April 2016, your husband must come back to you.
pls forgive him when he comes, improve on your skills and be the best wife to him.
Remember to give All the Glory to God wen he comes, because he MUST COME.
LET THE Angels of heaven carry out my declarations immediately.
Ure Blessed

Dear cionon, please take heed. Get as much proof as you can of your husbands cheating. He has no proof against you except hear say. Be very careful. People get tricky in cases like this. He has mistreated you, and even rubbed it in your face.

aspirebig:
Op,are you a believer? If yes, then go on your kneels.

Dem never born that mistress well, just do few prayer points on her head with few midnight vigils, your hubby will be back.

Use the PUSH strategy. Pray Until Something Happens. Prayer is the key.

Na my 2kobo be that o, as I no get cent.

I know a woman who prayed and fasted for 30years. She is still miserable. And shes already too old to start over. All her children are dysfunctional in one way or another. Advice her pls

victorazy:


Only sturbon ppl think this way.
Virtuous women build their homes.

Advice her to always apply wisdon in her word rather than using them carelessly.
Secondly, let her be making use of her kneels for God cuz it seems she doesn't pray.

How do you know I don't pray. I prayed even did midnite prayers on my own and sometimes had joint prayers with a female evanglist by 2am.

I am not usually careless with such word about magun but I really don't know why i said it. Since the march I said it up till November I left, I never had to say such again

tossen:


I know a woman who prayed and fasted for 30years. She is still miserable. And shes already too old to start over. All her children are dysfunctional in one way or another. Advice her pls

I don advice her naa, which one you no dey sef? Should I encourage her to file divorce? Sorry, I won't do that.

Pls the woman that prayed and fasted for 30yrs is just a summary you gave.

Prayer works for me very well.

bedspread:
I Declare to you on this last night of the month of march 2016 "I cancel any form of divorce btw you and your Hubby in the Name of Jesus. I also Decree and Declare that The GOD of Heaven, The Ocean divider turns your husband against his mistress and also turn the mistress against him in the Name of Jesus. Btw the 1st of April and the 14th of April 2016, your husband must come back to you.
pls forgive him when he comes, improve on your skills and be the best wife to him.
Remember to give All the Glory to God wen he comes, because he MUST COME.
LET THE Angels of heaven carry out my declarations immediately.
Ure Blessed

Amen

bedspread:
I Declare to you on this last night of the month of march 2016 "I cancel any form of divorce btw you and your Hubby in the Name of Jesus. I also Decree and Declare that The GOD of Heaven, The Ocean divider turns your husband against his mistress and also turn the mistress against him in the Name of Jesus. Btw the 1st of April and the 14th of April 2016, your husband must come back to you.
pls forgive him when he comes, improve on your skills and be the best wife to him.
Remember to give All the Glory to God wen he comes, because he MUST COME.
LET THE Angels of heaven carry out my declarations immediately.
Ure Blessed

Thus is how a woman goes thru life thinking shr hasnt done well or tried hard enough. If he doesnt come, she keeps doubting herself.
Her husband turned on her because he was scared. Cionon seems like a gentle woman. Her husband was shocked that she mentioned such a thing and he decided to make a move first and threthen her with a divorce. Im also sure its based on the mistresses advuce. Prayer is good. But this woman needs to see a lawyer that will help her secure her home fast. It isnt xompulsory it ends in duvorce. As long as dey are legally married, there are ways she can make him sit tight whether he likes it or not. She shd also pray as you said. Im not against prayers o. But heaven helps those who help themselves

May God give u peace to bear this...either he comes back or other way. It's a pity we are in men's world...see lots of men taking advantage of their wives which is very bad.

I have sisters too and when i listen to their stories, I have no choice than to encourage them.

aspirebig:


I don advice her naa, which one you no dey sef? Should I encourage her to file divorce? Sorry, I won't do that.

Pls the woman that prayed and fasted for 30yrs is just a summary you gave.

Prayer works for me very well.

I mean advice the old woman who spent her whole life on her knees and watching movies like war room. Its also not christianly to b satisfied as long as you are okay. I never said prayer doesnt work. But its not the only way. It should be accompanied by other efforts.

I never mentioned divorce either. Im completely against it.

cionon:


I am 27 . The marriage is just 2 years .the relationship with his mum was smooth until recently. Things just turned around

Well, you have agree on your side. That's good.

A marriage of 2 years it's still pretty young to make such serious decisions like divorce except in established cases of infidelity, violence our strong medical advice.

It's unfortunate your relationship with his mum has suddenly gone sour. She should've been your best shot.

I'm almost certain he needs his mother's support to on with the other lady. If she's with him on this, coming back may be very hard.

Have you been medical examined to be sure you can conceive? If yes, that's just an ace but note also that having a child is a divine grace not a guarantee.

God gives children to whom He wishes at the time He so desired.

The distance between you and the solution to this is the distance between your knees the floor. Call on God for solution and follow His directions.
Solution may not necessarily bee you guys coming together. Divorce may be the way out.

In my opinion, it appears trust is a big barrier in this marriage and if your husband would trip this easily on an issue you claimed you both resolved, he will trip on many more even if he comes back.

Don't rule putt the possibility of his return just as you shouldn't stuck your head in this mess if it all isn't working.

You can only do so much to make him come back. If he's resolute on divorce, good knows best. Please move on.

May God be with you.

If this isn't a movie script, this is exactly what I'll tell my sister.

The problem is I don't know how true ur story is but if all u write here is true ,then just allow him to go, he will regret it later or sooner. sorry

cionon:


How do you know I don't pray. I prayed even did midnite prayers on my own and sometimes had joint prayers with a female evanglist by 2am.

I am not usually careless with such word about magun but I really don't know why i said it. Since the march I said it up till November I left, I never had to say such again

Madam! God is not a deff God.

Am sorry for ur home but u have a pivotal role to play so that u can keep ur home cuz I believe "man is the head of home but woman is the owner of home"

Why is he leaving u to another woman?
Why did he want to divorce u?
No be other men dey buy their wives car etc?
Why is he hating u now?

Sit and ask ursef some questions rather than going about disclosing ur problem to ppl. Am a man, any day my wife go discuss our issue with my neighbor will be the day she will never forget.

cionon:


I come hear cos it's a faceless forum instead of going to friends who will broadcast my issue. I come for advice. And for all. I didn't marry my boyfriend whom I wrote about before. My husband was a friend before he asked me to marry him

Madam you need to let go of the LOT following you .... Ma

TheArchangel:
He is not asking for divorce because of what you listed rather he is asking because you are yet to conceive and he is using that as an excuse. He even have a mistress....
Get yourself checked out medically and get treated and allow him to wallow in his mess.

Move on while you are young.
No amount of begging will douse an already made up mind.

I see your angle but it's possible that this same man may have infected her with some disease while chasing miss mistress , I can't put it past the man that He's been unfaithful from day one and our sis here knows it but because She was bent on keeping her marriage, she probably kept a blind eye until now that the man is using the pressure of infertility. For all you know the man has a low sperm count or something that is preventing her from getting pregnant...it's sometimes a problem more with the man than he woman or both in some instances.

Her story is also a bit sketchy...not expecting her to spill everything here like the fights they probably have had over the mistress, personal temperament etc.....
My advice like some people have said is not to give up but seek counsel from the pastor or priest of their local church and see if He'd change His mind and commit to making this work.
Also stay very prayerful and disconnect for a while from those who won't give you Godly counsel.
If He eventually files for a divorce, then let him depart... You go heal...get a lot of good counsel, reposition yourself , go seek medical treatment and the difficult part is once you get your groove back, some crazy dude will be looking to get into your cookie jar...because you are most vulnerable at that point...if you are not careful and fall for one man, you will probably fall for dozens of them before the year ends and it may greatly affect your faith and personal relationship with God...Trust me, I have counseled with many young women just coming out of a divorce or a messy relationships....emotions often struggle for a front seat in their lives.
Wish you two get back together and start afresh....otherwise, your best days are still ahead so move on!

baby124:
You gave him the perfect excuse to use to divorce you. Next time you hear such stories outside, ensure you let people know they are all lies and proceed to tell them the truth about him. If he doesn't stop, get a lawyer and sue him for defamation of character. Make sure you milk him to nothing in the suit. Then we shall know if mistress will remain after he loses it all. Move on lady, hard as it is. But this guy is a mad man. You are free, enjoy it and choose more carefully next time.

Sue for what? You funny gan oo.

You think if she goes to court she wont lose?

All the man need to tell is that she threatened him bodily harm. which she admitted to. She threatened him with voodoo and magun

Ask any judge or any man or woman if they would stay with a spouse who confessed to be openly diabolical and even told you she would use her diabolical stuff against you

Of course she would say she was playing. The man would simply say I value my life, I dont want to be killed diabolically. Judge end this marriage

If your brother tells you that his wife threatened him with voodoo, what would you tell your brother? To stay in the marriage until he's killed or hypnotized?

victorazy:


Madam! God is not a deff God.

Am sorry for ur home but u have a pivotal role to play so that u can keep ur home cuz I believe "man is the head of home but woman is the owner of home"

Why is he leaving u to another woman?
Why did he want to divorce u?
No be other men dey buy their wives car etc?
Why is he hating u now?

Sit and ask ursef some question rather than going about disclosing ur problem to ppl. Am a man, any day my wife go discose our issue with my neighbor will be the day she will never forget.

She regrets this move dearly and has blamed herself all over her post...but does that warrant the foolish decision the man is taking...I think there's more to this.

Sometimes I wonder how two people who were all over each other could one day grow bored and irritated and desire a breakup or divorce.

This marriage thing is not beans.

The Lord can still save your marriage just pray.

EDIPO:



Well, you have agree on your side. That's good.

A marriage of 2 years it's still pretty young to make such serious decisions like divorce except in established cases of infidelity, violence our strong medical advice.

It's unfortunate your relationship with his mum has suddenly gone sour. She should've been your best shot.

I'm almost certain he needs his mother's support to on with the other lady. If she's with him on this, coming back may be very hard.

Have you been medical examined to be sure you can conceive? If yes, that's just an ace but note also that having a child is a divine grace not a guarantee.

God gives children to whom He wishes at the time He so desired.

The distance between you and the solution to this is the distance between your knees the floor. Call on God for solution and follow His directions.
Solution may not necessarily bee you guys coming together. Divorce may be the way out.

In my opinion, it appears trust is a big barrier in this marriage and if your husband would trip this easily on an issue you claimed you both resolved, he will trip on many more even if he comes back.

Don't rule putt the possibility of his return just as you shouldn't stuck your head in this mess if it all isn't working.

You can only do so much to make him come back. If he's resolute on divorce, good knows best. Please move on.

May God be with you.

If this isn't a movie script, this is exactly what I'll tell my sister.

Very well said!
Good job!