cionon:


Okay

That's the devil advising u to move on dear....
just like d goods guys here av said it, no body is above mistake, it might be d girl he's keeping that asking him to push for a divorce, please if u still love ur husband dont accept the divorce,, just keep praying for him, trust God ur husband will come back n be d better man u once married...
may God help u come out of this IJN.....Amen
good lock dear

Bollinger:


Did you read the post at all? The man has been having extra marital affairs since forever and the best advice you can give is to "pray for him". What is wrong with Nigerians for God's sake?

Please tell d house how best to handle such?
Retaliate, hug transformer, or pack out?
Common,
Wen situations seem outta control, pls calm down n pray.

jmichlins:
He does not deserve you. You are worth more much to be cheated on so let him go

She is referring to her husband and not a boyfriend.

MrSly:
parents who cannot train their children as a married couple cannot train them as a single parent.

FALLACY

We learn from our day to day activities, if ur man cheats on u pray for him, if he talks pls don't say a word cos if u do every word said will be used against u n all words will definately b reframed
Takia n wishin u all d best

maxti:

She is referring to her husband and not a boyfriend.

so because he is the husband he has every right to cheat and do all sort of things to the woman cause he knows that she always endure it. Life is a one time thing do not allow anyone ruin it for you because they know you will always have their back

cionon:



Where was it mentioned me and the neigbhour talked of juju? U pple shiuldnnot remix the version nau. Read and understand.
Nobody talked of juju with me. She was only telling me what she did to conceive. What my husband can take to boost our chances of conceiving. And I sawntge local thing as a risk to my husband's health and told her i dont want to be a widow.

If you had read through the thread, you will see I didn't gossip. I mean do I need to keep repeating how it went. I don't even tell of my marital issues to friends. I have been battling separation since and my best friend just knew of this on Tuesday and was surprised. Cos her first question was you can't just go through divorce you both must have been having issues

I told him the advice a former neigbhour of his gave me. Of which I told her I can't do such. Now he uses it against me. I feel bad because he didn't even say what I told him exactly. He changed the story. He lied about it.


My husband goes about telling everyone i am diabolic because I jokingly told him that he should be grateful I don't have a wicked heart if not I will use magun to catch him and his mistress. Which he even replied that he knows i dont have that mind. That i am still a child.
this was said around march of 2015.

Maybe I mis-read your story cos I saw magun (juju sex trap) and neighbor chatting (which I thought is gossip). Well, seek advise from a counselor or good guardian and not NL cos joking of Magun with your husband na really wa, lets assume it's a mistake but modern girls sha.

[color=#990000][/color] always think before you talk it really help atimes

Cionon. You and I know there is more to what you have posted here. Marriage is not by force, He has moved on.

You can't force marriage to be, it's not working for you means it's not working. Sometimes our past comes back to hunt us, reason why I mentioned your braggadocio on divorcing him.

Notwithstanding, No matter the wrong you have done, You deserve a second chance. Doesn't have to be from him. Look inward, work on yourself and prepare for a future loving husband.

mostyg:
Why cant I beg for love?
Is love the only reason we marry?
What of financial security?
What of family prestige?

@op. You have already revealed too much about your family on nairaland going by all your previous threads.

I guess you talk a lot and much about your family matters to strangers(neighbours)

whenever you beg for love you become a slave forever, all your life you will live at the other party's mercy and be on the quest to pls him or her for as long as the relationship lasts.
bsds this is a forum where your identity is not or barely known so you can discuss whatever is bugging you here instead of dying in silence.
mind you @op your husband doesn't want you to discuss your family issue whereas I'm sure his mistress is aware of every air you breathe in that house, it's his conscience that's judging him.
pray to God for direction.
peace.

cionon:
I confided in my husband when he accused me of listening to people. I then opened up and gave him an instance that if i listen to people i would ne doing what they asked me to do.I told him the advice a former neigbhour of his gave me. Of which I told her I can't do such. Now he uses it against me. I feel bad because he didn't even say what I told him exactly. He changed the story. He lied about it.


My husband goes about telling everyone i am diabolic because I jokingly told him that he should be grateful I don't have a wicked heart if not I will use magun to catch him and his mistress. Which he even replied that he knows i dont have that mind. That i am still a child.
this was said around march of 2015

Fastward to November he started asking for a divorce because he of his mistress he met online. Telling both his colleagues and family members that I am diabolic which is not true. I feel bad because this same man have also confided in me telling me things about his boss and others. We are currently separated

I just regret everything. I regret confinding in him and opening up to him. With pleas from everywhere, he is still insisting on divorce.

you already threatned to leave your husband in the past, that was a big mistake, now he dsnt think you love him anymore and the problems you had dsnt help either.

It would take the grace of God to change things

Vision4God:


Please tell d house how best to handle such?
Retaliate, hug transformer, or pack out?
Common,
Wen situations seem outta control, pls calm down n pray.

God help Nigerians and the way they think.

Wowzer:
Cionon. You and I know there is more to what you have posted here. Marriage is not by force, He has moved on.

You can't force marriage to be, it's not working for you means it's not working. Sometimes our past comes back to hunt us, reason why I mentioned your braggadocio on divorcing him.

Notwithstanding, No matter the wrong you have done, You deserve a second chance. Doesn't have to be from him. Look inward, work on yourself and prepare for a future loving husband.

She's hiding so many facts.

enoqueen:
Let him go.

If there is anyway u can take revenge on him by disclosing what he had said about people, expose him.

Marriage has taught me not to ever trust my husband with words.

are you still married?

The mistress have charmed him, he does not know what he is asking for unless GOD set him free.

Jaygrl:
Have you seen the movie War Room? If you haven't please buy that movie and watch today.

lol we talking real life matters ,you talking movies.

Anyway what othet movies do you recommend?

cionon:


I am christain. I wasn't discussing marital issues with her. I was trying to conceive then. So I met her for advice on her she conceived her after 5years of marriage. That's how it went. He is really serious with the divorce. I don't want the divorce. I have begged him for another chance to change where I wronged him. But he has bluntly refused.

To be frank with you I don't think he's gonna change his mind concerning the divorce. Such decision is hard to overturn and it will take the grace and mercy of God for him to have a change of her. What he felt for you before has flew out of the window after confiding in him and telling him that about that diabolic thing called "magun". It's scary and even at that he believes you can still do other diabolical things to tie him down. Well, the best advice is for you to keep on praying. God will help you through your travails...

cionon:


Tnx with all these that happened it thought me to speak wisely and Keep quiet on things. I will be a better person in my next marriage.

so its safe to say you have finally given up on this one right?

And how old are you now?

jmichlins:
so because he is the husband he has every right to cheat and do all sort of things to the woman cause he knows that she always endure it. Life is a one time thing do not allow anyone ruin it for you because they know you will always have their back

I'm having a hard time believing you're an adult because you reason like a naive child. She tells one side of the story and you're already crucifying the husband without knowing his side of the story. And the fact is, from her side of the story it's obvious she's responsible for her predicament and very likely the most culpable between the two; that's why she's not the one pushing for a divorce but the husband is. She's probably holding back on some crucial information that possibly would indict her in this case, so why not ask her to tell you the whole truth, because women are known in cases like this to only tell the part of the story that makes her look innocent and the victim, even though she might be the aggressor. I mean what kind of a woman sublty threatens to kill her husband openly to his face and calls that a joke? He would be stupid to ignore her threats. Wake up, this is the real world and some women have killed their husbands simply based on their insecurity whims or unsubstantiated fabrications. For the fact that she's apologetic further proves she knows she did things wrong and, I think it's a good sign she remorseful — if genuine. But you didn't consider things from every perspective but were so quick to take on her side just because the complainant is a female, thus acting like the typical Nigerian male that is a toadying sycophantic obsessed bootlicker to girls that don't even give the least flying fu©k about you. Maybe you should buy a skirt and wear it around, so people can easily differentiate between us real men and you b!tch pûssy niggas that always suck up to women

girlfriendsnatc:


I'm having a hard time believing you're an adult because you reason like a naive child. She tells one side of the story and you're already crucifying the husband without knowing his side of the story. And the fact is, from her side of the story it's obvious she's responsible for her predicament and very likely the most culpable between the two; that's why she's not the one pushing for a divorce but the husband is. She's probably holding back on some crucial information that possibly would indict her in this case, so why not ask her to tell you the whole truth, because women are known in cases like this to only tell the part of the story that makes her look innocent and the victim, even though she might be the aggressor. I mean what kind of a woman sublty threatens to kill her husband openly to his face and calls that a joke? He would be stupid to ignore her threats. Wake up, this is the real world and some women have killed their husbands simply based on their insecurity whims or unsubstantiated fabrications. For the fact that she's apologetic further proves she knows she did things wrong and, I think it's a good sign she remorseful — if genuine. But you didn't consider things from every perspective but were so quick to take on her side just because the complainant is a female, thus acting like the typical Nigerian male that is a toadying sycophantic obsessed bootlicker to girls that don't even give the least flying fu©k about you. Maybe you should buy a skirt and wear it around, so people can easily differentiate between us real men and you b!tch pûssy niggas that always suck up to women

Damn!! Plenty of nerves there and I doff my hat for your insightful peceptiveness in nailing the truth. What I thought about waa the guy aint gonna be waiting 10 years for his first child or maybe she's gotten herself into some 'spiritual/diabolical mess' with reasons why she aint abke to conceive...(just my thoughts though).... He's moved on really...

enoqueen:
Let him go.

If there is anyway u can take revenge on him by disclosing what he had said about people, expose him.

Marriage has taught me not to ever trust my husband with words.

Taking vengenace is a NO,NO,whatever happened to he who laugh last,laugh best.

Sister,if what you are saying is true,it would come back to bite him,then he would know your worth,that is in retrospect,by then it would be too late.

Be patient,with God your tommorrow would be better.

Take it to the Lord in prayer. There is nothing the Lord cannot do

Vision4God:


Please tell d house how best to handle such?
Retaliate, hug transformer, or pack out?
Common,
Wen situations seem outta control, pls calm down n pray.

The best approach to handle it is to distance yourself from such a man. Being married does not mean living a lifetime of unhappiness you know. This over dependence of prayers by Nigerians is an excuse for not having critical thinking skills.

Please allow him to just do that, so that I can take (snatch) you away from him . I beg no curse me o.

Flawlessangel:


so its safe to say you have finally given up on this one right?

And how old are you now?

I have begged him. I have spoken to people he respects both family and friends. I have exhausted every means for reconcilation and his forgiveness. He said no. The last time we spoke he said he has moved on and I should do same.

Malakh:
if you are not "married" there's no point in living, you can open a thread on it

lol

I'm too tired to argue right now, so I will just LOL

if you argue with me then you are contrary to me,dont argue with the truth

ladyF:

lol

I'm too tired to argue right now, so I will just LOL

Malakh:
if you argue with me then you are contrary to me,dont argue with the truth

Whatever rocks your boat really....lmao

q

troy20:

More keen on the statement that if half of the men had been raised by single mothers away from abusive fathers there would be better marriages.now how the hell is that ever true

Have you heard of men who became wife beaters because they grew you seeing their father constantly beat up their mothers only for their mothers to stay and build a stable home for them? Have you heard of spouses who murdered their spouses in front of their children? Have you heard of women who verbally abuse their husbands in front of their children and the female children growing up to also do the same to their husbands accepting such situations as normal?

Do you think these children would not have grown to become better people if they had been removed from such environment on time? I know of many examples of kids that grew up with a single parent and they are not ruined. They are even more stable than the so called children who grew up with fathers and mothers intact.

MrSly:
parents who cannot train their children as a married couple cannot train them as a single parent.

Alot if things into training a child. A person who is emotionally, psychologically, and mentally unstable cannot bring up a child. A child is best kept away from a parent who maltreats the other parent constantly in front of that child. If the child has a 10% chance of developing well away from that abusive parent, I would say, go for that 10%. A parent can actually do a better job bringing up a child alone than doing it with the other parent.