Nice!

This is interesting

Nancy2016:


He is the cause of his problems. Why didn't he wait till they had enough money before impregnating his wife? Must he do a naming ceremony? Also the article is saying you don't have to wait till you have made it before you get married. It isn't encouraging people to have kids when they can't afford to. There's no law that says that you must have kids immediately you get married. Some sensible people wait at least two years so that the couple can get to know each other well before starting a family.

To every step taken, there are millions units of zeal to take more. It is just like if you dont want to rape dont watch porn. if you get married in that position they will see it as not too much to start family and the urge will be requesting for it. but if you have not married you are away to thimk it. Even if no ceremony shoukd the kids spend years in hospital?

Todil:
The is probably the most inspiring piece have read on Nairaland

We need more of posts like this on nairaland.
Thirded

AntiWailer:
I won't advise anybody to marry broke.

When the lady is ageing and counting down age wise, she will encourage you to marry even without a job.

After marriage, her eyes will clear and frustration will set in.

Forget about 'LOVE', As a man, you should be able to take care of your family. Provide the basic necessities.

I have researched some families, 90% of the turbulence Marriage face, the underlining reason is MONEY.

- SHe is wasteful, he is wasteful, he is givving his family and not mine bla bla bla (MONEY)

Look for a lady much younger than you are so you will have breathing space to have an income to sustain a family. (When people with wisdom say don't marry your age mate, it is because of the breathing space you need to set your foot right but as usual we know so much and scream AGE IS JUST a number)

If you can not clothe, shelter, feed, protect her without anybody's help, you are not qualified to be called HUSBAND.

Difficult word, but truth does not have to be palatable.

So what should be the age difference? Mind you i have witnessed marriage that the man is about 12 years older than his wife yet his wife literally controls him.

Todil:
The is probably the most inspiring piece have read on Nairaland

Seconded

akanbiaa:
So what should be the age difference? Mind you i have witnessed marriage that the man is about 12 years older than his wife yet his wife literally controls him.

we are talking about financial control not all those control.

There is no age difference rule but what they meant is , u need a little time difference cos if she is aging , u will be forced to do the needful even without a job.

AntiWailer:
I won't advise anybody to marry broke.

When the lady is ageing and counting down age wise, she will encourage you to marry even without a job.

After marriage, her eyes will clear and frustration will set in.

Forget about 'LOVE', As a man, you should be able to take care of your family. Provide the basic necessities.

I have researched some families, 90% of the turbulence Marriage face, the underlining reason is MONEY.

- SHe is wasteful, he is wasteful, he is givving his family and not mine bla bla bla (MONEY)

Look for a lady much younger than you are so you will have breathing space to have an income to sustain a family. (When people with wisdom say don't marry your age mate, it is because of the breathing space you need to set your foot right but as usual we know so much and scream AGE IS JUST a number)

If you can not clothe, shelter, feed, protect her without anybody's help, you are not qualified to be called HUSBAND.

Difficult word, but truth does not have to be palatable.

You are the only one whose comment I give a pass mark. Ori e wambe.

AntiWailer:
I won't advise anybody to marry broke.

When the lady is ageing and counting down age wise, she will encourage you to marry even without a job.

After marriage, her eyes will clear and frustration will set in.

Forget about 'LOVE', As a man, you should be able to take care of your family. Provide the basic necessities.

I have researched some families, 90% of the turbulence Marriage face, the underlining reason is MONEY.

- SHe is wasteful, he is wasteful, he is givving his family and not mine bla bla bla (MONEY)

Look for a lady much younger than you are so you will have breathing space to have an income to sustain a family. (When people with wisdom say don't marry your age mate, it is because of the breathing space you need to set your foot right but as usual we know so much and scream AGE IS JUST a number)

If you can not clothe, shelter, feed, protect her without anybody's help, you are not qualified to be called HUSBAND.

Difficult word, but truth does not have to be palatable.

Bolded made me laugh. Red isn't true, though, and you make some wrong assumptions.

Strahovski1:
Nonsense. .broke nigga.
It's not just about your wife and you. Ypur kids.

Who says being broke will/must continue till the time you'll have kids?

JuanDeDios:

Bolded made me laugh. Red isn't true, though, and you make some wrong assumptions.

it is very true.

Most married women caught up in adultery do so because of one need or another.

and like i said it is the basis like the remote cause.

Elxandre:
Marriage is not everything!

My personal principle is that it's better to marry at 35 financially comfortable, than to marry at 25 broke.

I hate relationships getting strained over fickle things like money. Very disgusting it is.
I can still remember what happened to someone I know after he married broke. Not something you pray for.

Edit..

I also believe it's very selfish to marry broke, because you don't know what your financial situation would be in the short term.
How then do you cater for your kids if things do not improve before they come around.
Except of course you postpone child bearing.

You have spoken my mind. If it means saving at this young age and developing to earn more, I would do it till I know for sure that I can handle family finances without batting an eye-lid. All this talk of marrying at 25 without sufficient cash is suicidal talk.

AntiWailer:


it is very true.

Most married women caught up in adultery do so because of one need or another.

and like i said it is the basis like the remote cause.

Most of the married women who cheat don't do it for the money. I agree there are many women who are convinced money is the reason they cheat but I assure you that if all married men suddenly became rich cheating won't reduce much.

In the matter under discussion here, what is key, the point you seem to miss, is the person you're married to. Some couples are BOTH working and are comfortable with contributing to running the home - for them, being able to buy her good things to qualify as husband doesn't factor big. What people like you are holding on to is the old ideal. I have no problem with it but since we have moved on from the hunter-gatherer society when the man had to kill deer to bring the food home, to one where women now have as much opportunities to make money as men, we have to deal the reality that the large number of women working will correspond to the number of men displaced. Upholding the old ideal is, therefore, misguided. Displaced men - that is why you have too many men now roaming the streets in their 30's and 40's, unable to marry women who want a man who can buy them expensive toys. But I guess Nigerian women want to eat their cake and have it. They want the same work opportunities men have but want the husband to fund the home alone. Ok o.

Elxandre:
Marriage is not everything!

My personal principle is that it's better to marry at 45 financially comfortable, than to marry at 25 broke.

I hate relationships getting strained over fickle things like money. Very disgusting it is.
I can still remember what happened to someone I know after he married broke. Not something you pray for.

Edit..

I also believe it's very selfish to marry broke, because you don't know what your financial situation would be in the short term.
How then do you cater for your kids if things do not improve before they come around.
Except of course you postpone child bearing.

I changed the figure. Just curious. Do you still agree?

Chrisjane:


Look for a lady much younger than you are so you will have breathing space to have an income to sustain a family. (When people with wisdom say don't marry your age mate, it is because of the breathing space you need to set your foot right but as usual we know so much and scream AGE IS JUST a number)





Much younger? Like 13 years younger

13 years? What sort of child abuse is that?

Nancy2016:


Why would a woman go through formal education for so many years and then consider becoming a hair dresser?

But you can 'go through formal education for so many years' to earn a paltry sum of 70k monthly abi?

ojun50:
Hw i wish d ladies family we understand dis

we understand, even more than the men do.

Well said

JuanDeDios:

I changed the figure. Just curious. Do you still agree?

Lol... You should have just said 60 thou troublemaker.

Well I expect a man to be financially sorted to a decent extent at least before 40, come on.

But if things doubt go according to plans, you might have to reconsider some of your principles.
Such is life!

obiaguna:


You have spoken my mind. If it means saving at this young age and developing to earn more, I would do it till I know for sure that I can handle family finances without batting an eye-lid. All this talk of marrying at 25 without sufficient cash is suicidal talk.

You know, things work out well for a few people, and people assume it will work for everyone.

One of the foremost Pastors in Nigeria married an in-law of mine when he was totally broke.
Their wedding was a joke in the village.
But now they come to the village with convoys and the best SUVs around.

But I also have another person I know who did it, and I'm still sorry for the after effect it has on him till this day. (After several years).

Great post OP

Axsetup:


Source: http://www.punchng.com/getting-married-even-when-you-are-broke/

true talk

[quote author=Kapira333 post=44555947][/quote]

Please read what I wrote properly. They don't have to start procreating immediately. They can wait till they are financially viable. There are natural methods of contraception. I'm sure you are old enough to know them, if not, Google is your friend.

afroxyz:


But you can 'go through formal education for so many years' to earn a paltry sum of 70k monthly abi?

How many hairdressers have a profit of 70k per month?

ogechieku:
To every step taken, there are millions units of zeal to take more. It is just like if you dont want to rape dont watch porn. if you get married in that position they will see it as not too much to start family and the urge will be requesting for it. but if you have not married you are away to thimk it. Even if no ceremony shoukd the kids spend years in hospital?

Please learn how to proofread before posting. As an adult you make your own decisions. If you know you can't afford to have kids, wait till you can. You should never bow to pressure. People may talk, but it's your life and you are the one responsible for your kids.

It is not an excuse in this era. If you can have a gf, you can have a wife

Don't have kids yet till you have the money but the marriage can be done at anytime

Nancy2016:


Please learn how to proofread before posting. As an adult you make your own decisions. If you know you can't afford to have kids, wait till you can. You should never bow to pressure. People may talk, but it's your life and you are the one responsible for your kids.

I wish people think the way you do

AntiWailer:
I won't advise anybody to marry broke.

When the lady is ageing and counting down age wise, she will encourage you to marry even without a job.

After marriage, her eyes will clear and frustration will set in.

Forget about 'LOVE', As a man, you should be able to take care of your family. Provide the basic necessities.

I have researched some families, 90% of the turbulence Marriage face, the underlining reason is MONEY.

- SHe is wasteful, he is wasteful, he is givving his family and not mine bla bla bla (MONEY)

Look for a lady much younger than you are so you will have breathing space to have an income to sustain a family. (When people with wisdom say don't marry your age mate, it is because of the breathing space you need to set your foot right but as usual we know so much and scream AGE IS JUST a number)

If you can not clothe, shelter, feed, protect her without anybody's help, you are not qualified to be called HUSBAND.

Difficult word, but truth does not have to be palatable.

U made more sense than the OP.

I WISH U A HAPPY SUNDAY.
When LADIES start ageing, they always condone or over look everything.

U hear them say AGE is just a NUMBER.
some sign MOU with their pastors, so that VISIONS and DREAMS can be seen on their heads, to enable the Pastor hook them up with one brother in the church.
NEVER marry your AGE-MATE, it is never IDEAL... except on very rare occasions.


GUYS be warned....!!!
The 2 commonest causes of FAILED MARRIAGES are
SEX and MONEY

AntiWailer:


it is very true.

Most married women caught up in adultery do so because of one need or another.

and like i said it is the basis like the remote cause.

Mtchewww

You do not know what you are talking about

Toks2008:
I have written many times on this but our ladies seldom listen...abeg talk another thing...most ladies usually wait till they are overage before they start reasoning logically.

Sometimes you just make unreasonable statements!

So most ladies are unmarried because they can't stand broke men? Hear yourself!

You assume most ladies are unmarried because some da.ft ones come to you for advice

Joavid:
woreva, broke people should not get married. especially since married people forget all forms of contraceptives as soon as they get married, coupled with pressure to have a baby...all inside poverty!

olorunmaje!

This is more like daf.t people should not get married.

You have no excuse! Try again!

Elxandre:

You know, things work out well for a few people, and people assume it will work for everyone.

One of the foremost Pastors in Nigeria married an in-law of mine when he was totally broke.
Their wedding was a joke in the village.
But now they come to the village with convoys and the best SUVs around.

But I also have another person I know who did it, and I'm still sorry for the after effect it has on him till this day. (After several years).

Oh men. How is he doing now? People should actually try to meet up with most of their goals before they get married. We also have to take our time. I guess everybody is just subscribing to the whole bae and boo bandwagon. Loneliness is not a bad thing, and if well utilized, can turn into blessings for you and your future partner. It's hard, but if young people can get busy trying to better themselves with proper investments and other things, marriage would be very enjoyable.