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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? (1382 Views)
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Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by Goghelpme: 1:21am On May 25, 2016 |
I am a regular Nairalander with a different moniker, had to open this new one for privacy reason. It is with heavy heart I write this, I will try and give details as much as I can. I have been dating my girl for about four years now (my first and only relationship), she is going to 28yrs and me 31yrs (3 & 1/2yrs age difference). We are both devoted christians. It all started with my elder sister telling me to start praying for God to reveal my wife to me (I was 25 then). Personally I got my revelation/conviction of her being my wife about a year later I also involved some minister friends (advice on my revelation), and took about another one year later before we started dating. No sex until marriage rule agreed (it has been tough sticking to that especially for me as a man of my age but thanks to God). And so the Journey began, we became best of friends, great lovers we are just the perfect Couple, plan and execute every targets together, Sponsored ourselves to finish our education (me weekend part-time, she open university). I supported her financially as best as i could, even once postponed payment of my school fees to pay hers (without her knowing mine was due, thank God my school later had strike) because she is managing a teaching job. Her mom has not been in support especially with the fact that I am not a "big boy" but her father maintains a neutral ground (although he loves me so much and I am closer to him than his two sons). I am the only male among seven children, One of My elder sister (the same one that initiated my prayer) never approved of her because she doesn't feels okay with her spiritually and warned me. Fast forward now, I have been able to buy the consent of my family, informed her dad of my plan to bring my family to begin the marriage process and now here comes the issue. Although on my own I have had revelations personally informing me of her family having spiritual issue but being blinded by love I never took it serious. Now my best friend went out to see a prophet and was told that in my fiancee's family (her mother's side) they have a problem that anytime they get married (the females) they pass through a phase of mental instability. In reality am aware the elder sister whose family am close to just recovered from hers after over two years. I was aware of the sister issue but never knew it was a family routine. The revelation of my friend made me to remember her mother's sister had serious sickness (not mental) that lasted over a year after she married. Now am in a fix, I love her so much, a greater part of me is willing to take the risk with her but my greatest fear is this; if this routine is not broken, can I be able to face the fact that I knowingly drag my future daughters into this mess? Advice please! Note: am not the prophecy freak person, never for once consulted a prophet myself and I tried avoiding it in this case. Cc: lalalasticlala |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by Nobody: 1:27am On May 25, 2016 |
Decide. Just assume it's a sure banker she'll run mad. Will you be able to stay strong and pull through? 1 Like |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by ronald4lif(m): 1:31am On May 25, 2016 |
Sorry buddy, stopped reading at "I asked men of God if she's my wife and it's a no-sex relationship." Can't be bothered with cobblers. Good luck in whatever advice you seek. |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by Nobody: 1:54am On May 25, 2016 |
Wait.. lemme ask ifa |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by Goghelpme: 2:58am On May 25, 2016 |
ronald4lif: Never mention asking men of God if she is my wife |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by Goghelpme: 3:00am On May 25, 2016 |
Oliviaarims: Am willing to do that but my fear is putting my future children in same problem. |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by Nobody: 3:43am On May 25, 2016 |
Goghelpme: Right...that's a serious thought with great implications. How about you investigate properly? Find out how far back this trend has been in her family... And how many victims are involved. 2 Likes |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by Goghelpme: 4:02am On May 25, 2016 |
Oliviaarims: Yea! Thanks, to even think of it for fear of seeing her hurt, don't know if I can approach her with the issue, she saw me yesterday and keep insisting from her view it was obvious something is bothering me. |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by mudility(m): 4:21am On May 25, 2016 |
op go ahead marry her. Forget all those spiritual crap in their family. Your faith and believe in Jesus is what will count here. As long as you believe, you and your household is free from every generational causes. Abeg if you don't still want her pass me her number..lol 2 Likes |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by Nobody: 4:32am On May 25, 2016 |
dis is jst like d d situation of an As guy and an As lady. Banking your future on probability. baba let love not put u in a deep shit. dnt let ur female children pay for sumtin u could easily avert. dont let ur children cause you. I know love is a bastard by my bro USE UR HEAD 1 Like |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by Aremu01(m): 6:00am On May 25, 2016 |
There is nothing prayer cannot do bro. If you are sure God said she is yr wife, y not go ahead? Just be prepared to battle in prayers 1 Like |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by Nobody: 6:47am On May 25, 2016 |
Goghelpme: Well...you might just have to talk to her about it. I don't know...perhaps, she'll make you understand the situation of things better. 1 Like |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by Goghelpme: 7:47am On May 25, 2016 |
Oliviaarims:Thank you Dear |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by Goghelpme: 7:48am On May 25, 2016 |
Aremu01:thanks bro |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by Goghelpme: 7:49am On May 25, 2016 |
nnamdiokere45: Thank you |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by Goghelpme: 7:51am On May 25, 2016 |
mudility:Thanks |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by tee59(f): 8:13am On May 25, 2016 |
Snce u ar a matured christain, b4 getn married to her, both of u shld pray well and let her go for deep deliverance. Such family problems lik dat shld nt be takn lightly. To avoid future crises in your own family, do ur assignment well.Whn d reality of life set in ur marriage, love only can nt solve it, if u pple do not break d yoke of foundational problem now. Ur unborn children shld be ur concern. Every family has its own problem, so her's is not different. Make sure she is free by d power of God frm dat bondage b4 getting married. 1 Like |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by Nobody: 10:26am On May 25, 2016 |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by Nobody: 10:45am On May 25, 2016 |
Goghelpme:What is the problem with all this Christians of doom? you can pray to God to reveal if she is your wife,but you can't pray to God to avert whatever disaster runs in her family? if it is true at all. are you saying your God is a God of doom? I don't get all this mentality. |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by Goghelpme: 11:43am On May 25, 2016 |
pucelle: Wonderful piece, thank you |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by cyberguy72(m): 12:22pm On May 25, 2016 |
My view, Prevention is better than Cure. |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by Ginaz(f): 12:30pm On May 25, 2016 |
pucelle: Thank you for this, they will pray to God for direction but will go to people for the compass. If he doesn't wants to marry the girl he should let her be instead of wasting her time. Generation curse my foot. If you believe in God, why should you ask people's opinion? |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by Goghelpme: 12:49pm On May 25, 2016 |
Ginaz: Thank you. A problem shared is a problem half solved. I avoid telling anyone close to me because I don't want anybody to force decision on me. My sharing has been an encouragement to me, and opened me to some ideas I never thought of. If I don't want her, I wouldn't have bothered sharing it here, read my post and you will find me mention that greater part of me wants to go ahead. Mind you I stated I have witnessed two cases in the family, Consider my emotion too, Is it easy to intentionally walk into a potential danger? |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by Ginaz(f): 1:12pm On May 25, 2016 |
Goghelpme: If you know you can't bear the outcome of the decision to marry her by all means don't try it. Pls we should know that endurance is like a foundation for love to keep moving. If you know you can't endure the future, make plans now at the present to alter it. Love can't simply get both of you through it when you see your children suffering from this generation curse you claim. There are times to be a man, and there are times to use wisdom. You are having doubts, Pls use your wisdom to handle this situation. Isn't it better now you let her go? Isn't it better you mend the path of destruction while you can? She will be the one at the receiving end too, think of times she will be sad and thinking she caused this herself. There are two side to this, "you neither marry her believing God for a miracle or leave her now and everyone goes it's own way no generation curse panic. If you can't handle it, let it go. Loving someone doesn't mean you gat to spend the rest of your life with them, sometimes loving someone means you gat to love them from a distance and never letting them go from your heart. The way I see it, due to your emotions you have to let HER GO. Marriage is a risk, you can be happy or miserable for as long as it lasts. |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by andreernest28(m): 1:22pm On May 25, 2016 |
Young man,don t play with your future coz you don t know what it holds,sorry i have to be very blurnt.Walk away,may God help you. |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by publicenemy(m): 4:07pm On May 25, 2016 |
Goghelpme: You can take risks with you life but never takes risks with the lives of your un born children. That's all I have to tell you bro. |
Re: Help! Should I Still Go Ahead And Marry Her? by Goghelpme: 12:27pm On Nov 11, 2016 |
Whatsapp me for the bit..co 08025834431 Osgilliat |
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