Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by Chrishandsome(m): 6:29am On Jul 14, 2016 |
Oga run as far as u can o..that is witchcraft 1 Like |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by MrPIE(m): 6:33am On Jul 14, 2016 |
My Broo, take a chill pill... God loves U, that's why He showed U the cruelty of the Family. Don't rush into marriage, if U rush in, U rush out. Take note that the Girl and the Mum have unforgiven spirit. They turned a Man to a mere House Boy, I pray that U find a better Woman with a better Family. Marriage na for life My Friend, disengage from this future entrapment U call a relationship. Take heed My Friend and go closer to God. Baba God loves U pieces... |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by iPopAlomo(m): 6:36am On Jul 14, 2016 |
Lightening:
I am only teaching you life lessons. You desperately need it going by your posts which make you strike me as one of such carefree entities that pay little attention to the principles of life but will start screaming the devil when the evil consequences of their actions come calling. You think say free cocoa get sense...? that girl nah cow... 2 Likes |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by Skmoda360(m): 6:39am On Jul 14, 2016 |
chiefolododo: RUN FOR YOUR LIFE
Bros, break Usain Bolt record... |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by Skmoda360(m): 6:40am On Jul 14, 2016 |
chiefolododo: RUN FOR YOUR LIFE
Bros, break Usain Bolt record... |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by Blitz888(m): 6:46am On Jul 14, 2016 |
nnamdibig: If you are not ready to be like the man you saw, its time to move on. Because your fiancé will be taking advice from her mum.
on are second thought, if you have really decided to marry the girl, then go and spend some times with the man. am sure he will have something to tell you. at least you hear his own side of the story. |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by RiloKiley: 6:51am On Jul 14, 2016 |
19naia: I know the man may have abused them in the past, but the issue is that they still hold to punishing him and relish in it to an extent that has become them with a likely sense of power and conquering over all men of the world. This means that they are so accustomed to and embellished in treating men like that and believeing that men are abusers who must be pusnished. They will pathologically take this approach now to all men that come to be a close part of their home and way of being. As soon as there is conflict of any small measure between you and fiancee, she will fall back on her training and experience with how to handle men at home and of what merit to give men. Her mom has exposed her to that as her primary way. They will have the same in store for you at any sign of the smallest friction. They will never change until they can change with the man they have now at home and change to make deep ammends all around. Its not just deep wounds they have festering in their home, but the proverbial knife is still in the wound and they are digging it in deeper rather than pulling it out for healing. Why would you join such a circus of madness?
Run now before they use you like a donkey and mentally restrain you to resignation into whatever fate they determine over you. Run now before they drive you mad to the point of waking to slaughter them in the night, like the goats they are.
Leave and don't look back because those are women who have learned to hate men yet never learned to overcome their desire for men. They want to be kings without the independence and strength to be such, so they look for a man to walk all over for the image of strength and power. A man cannot prosper in life beside a woman who does not have the substance to encourage and support prosperity in her man partner.
Be wise and don't cost yourself a browsing of hell in life before you die. No amount of prayer or hope will help you if you deliver yourself to them . Its them who need prayer and hope, so let them be and pray for them in hope -at a safe distance. Spawn of Medusa who will turn any man to stone. Spawn of Medusa, cursed by God himself and not a favor he would solve just for you just because of a little prayer. You will suffer and risk to life and limb with them... And risk to sanity with them.
Run. Its better to be alone, free and safer than to be locked down to Spawn of Medusa.
They crucified Jesus and Jesus came back not to punish, but to forgive and save souls. That woman is the opposite. She was never killed but she has a home-made hell she is enjoying being the master of, in her house as if she is the devil himself. They will only be happy to add you to the flames. They could just forgive and forget the man and let him go, but they have learned to enjoy making hell for him. It has entered their blood now and will be their personality until they can forgive, forget and let him go with no interest in making anybody suffer. Wow. You sir, are a writer of no small measure. 2 Likes |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by gdonmylife(m): 6:55am On Jul 14, 2016 |
sammily: Please I want people to help me out here. I proposed to my girlfriend of 8 months last 2 week ago and we agreed to visit her home last Sunday. I have always dropped her off around the place but I have never entered the house because I wasn't yet ready to meet the parent because we were just dating then and I wasn't yet sure that she was the one for me. Meanwhile all these while, My girl was only referring to her mum so I subconsciously concluded that the father is late. So last Sunday, I got to their house at Agege pen Cinema and what I saw was very sad. I saw a man looking so haggard in the sitting room and I greeted him, He answered in a very low tone and welcomed me. My girls mum soon came out to the sitting room and also greeted me. We exchanged pleasantries before my girl came out to join us in the discuss. At a point my girls mum brought out money and asked the haggard man to go and buy fuel to power the generator for me so that Heat will not disturb me.
We discussed at length after the man left. To cut the long story short, After the meeting we fixed another date for the second meeting that I was supposed to attend with a family member. When I was about leaving, I gave them some money and some to the man and he fell on his knees thanking me as if he has never owned N1000 in his entire life. When my girl was seeing me off, I asked her who the man was and lo and behold, it was her father. I couldn't believe my ears. it was like a rude joke. it was unbelievable. She must has sensed my confusion before she started telling me stories of how the man maltreated her mum when he had money, how he married another wife who squandered all his money and left them in penury. She said he used to beat her mum and all sorts which I cannot write here.
Since that Sunday till now, I've had no peace of mind, I've been thinking and imagining how a right thinking woman and her daughter can comfortably relegate the man of the house to a mere houseboy. That Sunday, the man was wearing a torn knicker and a white singlet that I won't even use to clean my car. Even my wife to be hushed him down when he came back and wanted to keep the fuel change to himself. Something is wrong somewhere, a woman who could treat her husband like this no matter what he did in the past is scary. I have not even picked her calls since that Sunday evening. I am scared and I don't know what to do next.
Guy run for your life. Yours as an in law will be worst. The earlier the better. Don't be lured in by any of their gimmicks. Warning signal for you. |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by chiefolododo(m): 7:06am On Jul 14, 2016 |
I am not OP, I am assistant OP deltateam:
I concur! Op please I mean well for you. If your fiancee can treat her own father with that much disdain I wonder how your own case would be after marriage. They may turn you to a vegetable.
You will be cut off from your family. Your own nah to dey answer dem yes Mas! |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by 0ubenji(m): 7:09am On Jul 14, 2016 |
Babzilla: What are you pple saying? the man is is only reapibg the fruits of his bullshit Its a simple case of payback. Pls if she is caring go ahead and marry her Hmmn..."Subjecting ur bio-fada to servitude' is ur own definition of "carin" in a woman....#strange Afta forgivin him..If dey cudnt bear to contain the hurt the fada must av done to dem..they shud rather let him go.. But Makin sure he stayed around nd suffer payback is WICKEDNESS !!... ---------------------------------------------------------- One tin I'm certain of in OP's story..the wife's family is Yoruba... |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by Certifiedboss: 7:12am On Jul 14, 2016 |
sammily: Please I want people to help me out here. I proposed to my girlfriend of 8 months last 2 week ago and we agreed to visit her home last Sunday. I have always dropped her off around the place but I have never entered the house because I wasn't yet ready to meet the parent because we were just dating then and I wasn't yet sure that she was the one for me. Meanwhile all these while, My girl was only referring to her mum so I subconsciously concluded that the father is late. So last Sunday, I got to their house at Agege pen Cinema and what I saw was very sad. I saw a man looking so haggard in the sitting room and I greeted him, He answered in a very low tone and welcomed me. My girls mum soon came out to the sitting room and also greeted me. We exchanged pleasantries before my girl came out to join us in the discuss. At a point my girls mum brought out money and asked the haggard man to go and buy fuel to power the generator for me so that Heat will not disturb me.
We discussed at length after the man left. To cut the long story short, After the meeting we fixed another date for the second meeting that I was supposed to attend with a family member. When I was about leaving, I gave them some money and some to the man and he fell on his knees thanking me as if he has never owned N1000 in his entire life. When my girl was seeing me off, I asked her who the man was and lo and behold, it was her father. I couldn't believe my ears. it was like a rude joke. it was unbelievable. She must has sensed my confusion before she started telling me stories of how the man maltreated her mum when he had money, how he married another wife who squandered all his money and left them in penury. She said he used to beat her mum and all sorts which I cannot write here.
Since that Sunday till now, I've had no peace of mind, I've been thinking and imagining how a right thinking woman and her daughter can comfortably relegate the man of the house to a mere houseboy. That Sunday, the man was wearing a torn knicker and a white singlet that I won't even use to clean my car. Even my wife to be hushed him down when he came back and wanted to keep the fuel change to himself. Something is wrong somewhere, a woman who could treat her husband like this no matter what he did in the past is scary. I have not even picked her calls since that Sunday evening. I am scared and I don't know what to do next.
Don't go further bro. As a man if you want to get married to a lady and her both parents are alive you should check out on how the mother treats the husband ... As a lady if you want get serious with a man you should check out how he treats his mother and close female friends. |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by Lightening: 7:14am On Jul 14, 2016 |
baby124:
Look, no man can mistreat me and my children and even find my address when he is desperate ok? Her mother even tried giving him shelter. So after he must have abandoned them for ashawo and the mother did anything to raise her kids, she should now accept the cursed being into her life to keep eating her food and living from her sweat so he can resume carrying ashawo. Such things can never even happen in my home because my husband after messing up knows he cannot come back to tell me any story.
Don't change your ways, continue... The one wey go meet you for front de wait you? Small mistake you say? You call abandoning your family for another woman a small mistake Why did he go back to who he treated badly? Are his girlfriends all dead?
Some of you talk of conscience but do things to other's you cannot take. This man is reaping the fruits of his wickedness and you are talking to me about someone's conscience being dead? Is it not your conscience that is dead? For you to call such a big issue a mistake? Women should fear you! Leave your name, date of birth, photo and address so women can run from you!
E no go beta for the man we go do me or my daughters this kind thing. Thunder, lightening, brimstone! Sangoooo!!! Two wrongs can never make a right. If you ever seek to be genuinely happy, the key is forgiveness. By the way, while you are at the revenge mission, what do you think your relationship with God will be like? If you don't forgive men their trespasses, you will not be forgiven either says the holy book. In a but shell, it will be in yours and daughter's interest to forgive and reintegrate the errant father. A complete home is usually more attractive to suitors than broken ones. 1 Like |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by 0ubenji(m): 7:17am On Jul 14, 2016 |
Jamean: Hmmm! This story brings back a lot of memories. Oh! Life!
But as much as it takes the grace of God to forgive, if they won't forgive him genuinely for the past they should let him go. Exactly my point mehn..but the wickedness in dem won't let him go unless dey av finished him.. |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by Certifiedboss: 7:18am On Jul 14, 2016 |
sammily: Please I want people to help me out here. I proposed to my girlfriend of 8 months last 2 week ago and we agreed to visit her home last Sunday. I have always dropped her off around the place but I have never entered the house because I wasn't yet ready to meet the parent because we were just dating then and I wasn't yet sure that she was the one for me. Meanwhile all these while, My girl was only referring to her mum so I subconsciously concluded that the father is late. So last Sunday, I got to their house at Agege pen Cinema and what I saw was very sad. I saw a man looking so haggard in the sitting room and I greeted him, He answered in a very low tone and welcomed me. My girls mum soon came out to the sitting room and also greeted me. We exchanged pleasantries before my girl came out to join us in the discuss. At a point my girls mum brought out money and asked the haggard man to go and buy fuel to power the generator for me so that Heat will not disturb me.
We discussed at length after the man left. To cut the long story short, After the meeting we fixed another date for the second meeting that I was supposed to attend with a family member. When I was about leaving, I gave them some money and some to the man and he fell on his knees thanking me as if he has never owned N1000 in his entire life. When my girl was seeing me off, I asked her who the man was and lo and behold, it was her father. I couldn't believe my ears. it was like a rude joke. it was unbelievable. She must has sensed my confusion before she started telling me stories of how the man maltreated her mum when he had money, how he married another wife who squandered all his money and left them in penury. She said he used to beat her mum and all sorts which I cannot write here.
Since that Sunday till now, I've had no peace of mind, I've been thinking and imagining how a right thinking woman and her daughter can comfortably relegate the man of the house to a mere houseboy. That Sunday, the man was wearing a torn knicker and a white singlet that I won't even use to clean my car. Even my wife to be hushed him down when he came back and wanted to keep the fuel change to himself. Something is wrong somewhere, a woman who could treat her husband like this no matter what he did in the past is scary. I have not even picked her calls since that Sunday evening. I am scared and I don't know what to do next.
During my service year in Ebonyi there was this family close to where I was living. The man is sick so he was dropped at his place of work. The kids don't help him with errands . He washes his own cloths and fetch his own water . His wife go out a d return whenever she likes . Sleeps out . Some women have deep mind |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by Izen: 7:21am On Jul 14, 2016 |
[quote author=stunningjudy post=47518432][/quote]
You've still not answered me. Was what the man did right? The evil men do eventually catch up with them. I'm sure you think what the man did to the family was nothing compared to this. If only you knew how much women endure. I may not do the same in the same position but I have no pity for him. 1 Like |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by bigyomite(m): 7:21am On Jul 14, 2016 |
Pls borrow Aja 50 with spring canvers and run like Osein Bolt because i sense second houseboy loading on your head oooo |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by repogirl(f): 7:21am On Jul 14, 2016 |
That family put the dysfunction in dysfunctional. OP, run faster than your legs can take you...... your instinct is on point. 2 Likes |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by 0ubenji(m): 7:24am On Jul 14, 2016 |
harsysky: [b]Dear Op, My comment may not actually make sense to anyone, but I don't care. I'm writing directly to you Op because you've come here for a solution. I've also read a lot of people's comments, especially the " run for your life!"
I would have easily said you should run, but come to think of it, "No one is perfect". You ain't, Op, no matter how sympathetic and sensitive you may think you are. That girl of yours may have undergone series of assaults or brain-wiring that most or some of us have also undergone, Only that hers might have gotten into her so , so much. It may not be her fault actually. Be rest assured she can come of it and love like never before.
I like you a lot Op. Your sense of care and observation, I respect so much. You never can tell if you would have acted more than your wife-to-be if you were in her shoes. Leaving her and not picking her calls means one thing to me. You wana be those kind of people who know how to deal with a problem but leave it because they respect people's say more than theirs. Talk to your girl. Atleast, there is something you've seen in her that has attracted you to her. Assuming you didn't see her Dad, you wouldn't be here complaining, right? Don't think the next person you will meet will be that saint. You could save that family. The head of that family might have done something anyone could even kill him for ,but I believe they still feed him atleast. It means there is still 1% love for the old man. They can still love him to the fullest but need to be convinced that one does not pay evil with evil otherwise evil will be in circulation.
I can never forget the advice my aunt gave me one precious day. I was having a problem with my Dad. I was thinking he never loved me. Then , the auto-correct advice came and it goes thus: " the only man who hates you is one who shuts you out all round. Does your Dad shut you out?". " No" I replied "Then he loves you more than anything" she concluded
I believed her whole-heartedly. she is now my mentor. [/b] Hmm..why do I av dis strange feelin u r the OP's fiancee in questn... |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by Lightening: 7:29am On Jul 14, 2016 |
iwadobo:
Best comment so far. He should call her and tell her why he is quiting . He should advise her to change her ways so that this kind of break up won't happen to her in the future. That advice will go a long way to restructuring the family . After such discussion, the guy should try as much as possible not to have any contact with the girl, because he could be charmed and that will be disastrous. Telling her the reason might not be a good idea. She may just get back home and team with the mother and snuff life out of the poor father for driving a suitor away. I have observed that such unforgiving women blames everybody but themselves for their woes. 4 Likes |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by Lightening: 7:39am On Jul 14, 2016 |
iPopAlomo:
You think say free cocoa get sense...? that girl nah cow... No mind the emotionally unbalanced little girl. This is the kind of woman one unfortunate man will pick one day as wife. In a short while after failing to build proper character, she will run to one church and sow seed faith and start claiming her husband. 2 Likes |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by obiak4(m): 7:42am On Jul 14, 2016 |
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Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by 0ubenji(m): 7:45am On Jul 14, 2016 |
brightguru: What if its a test? The man is actually their house boy God punish that useless test...is dat a test of virtue on their part..?? So if ur sis goes to her fiance's ause and see him beatin a woman who he reveals to be his mom.. You'll reason it as a test too uh?....shioor 1 Like |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by obiak4(m): 7:46am On Jul 14, 2016 |
0ubenji:
Hmm..why do I av dis strange feelin u r the OP's fiancee in questn...
Pinky are you poundering what am poundering ? |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by muganbo1(m): 7:47am On Jul 14, 2016 |
Denial isn't a river in Eygpt it strongly means u r ignoring d obvious, nigga stay away frm such family take ur tym to look for sm1 beta from a gud family. Back to her u don't nid to xplain d reason y u won't 2 drop her if @ all she ask, use ur initiative by giving her flimsy excuse coz of her fada @ home or else dem go finish d man n d issue will bi on u coz u prompt dem to do dat . Ireeee ooooo |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by 0ubenji(m): 7:48am On Jul 14, 2016 |
repogirl: That family put the dysfunction in dysfunctional. OP, run faster than your legs can take you...... your instinct is on point. Correct..!! Peju...I bliv u juz like ur 'dave and barbie' story jaree.. 1 Like |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by 0ubenji(m): 7:50am On Jul 14, 2016 |
obiak4:
Pinky are you poundering what am poundering?
Erm..I fink so brain |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by glossy6(f): 7:51am On Jul 14, 2016 |
Oma307: The truth is the man has been charm by the woman, a right thinking woman will not do that in front of a visitor, bro u have been adviced to run but i will say u should sprint for ur dear life because i believe the lady is also aware of it The fact that they displayed that stupid behaviour before a total stranger, an in law to be speaks volume. The op is lucky that he witnessed it "live" and not a prophecy by one pastor, 1 Like |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by AuroraB(f): 7:52am On Jul 14, 2016 |
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Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by extremelygolden: 7:57am On Jul 14, 2016 |
Please don't be the next victim. If Usian Bolt legs can't carry you far away from that family, please borrow more fast legs! There is an adage that says for you to know who your future wife really is or will be, see her mother.
I wish you well! |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by Okoedopickin: 7:58am On Jul 14, 2016 |
What are you waiting for? RUN MY FRIEND! |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by 0ubenji(m): 7:58am On Jul 14, 2016 |
freecocoa: OP, while I don't support anyone being maltreated, you can't rule out everything your woman said because believe me you, I know a family like that back in the uni.
The man used to maltreat his wife and kids when he had some change, when things changed, the woman didn't forgive him, ergo did things to show him she was bitter at him, blah blah blah.
It's not news that some men are worse than the mythical devil when they have money, so you need to be sure before taking any decision, it's hard to know that your father maltreated your mum and still be nice to him. I dint quite get the point of dis ur comment-cum-advice sef.. What does he need to be sure of exactly?.. If d OP finds out the man expectedly maltreated his fiancee and her mom b4...so wat dey did in return is an indicator for a gud wife shey?.. So when he bcums SURE of the probable...WHAT NEXT?? 1 Like |
Re: I Am Scared, My Fiancee And Her Mum Treats Her Father Like A Houseboy by wizflower(f): 7:58am On Jul 14, 2016 |
Those that have buttocks no sabi sit with am. Am here crying out my eye cos I grow up and even got my own family with no one to call daddy and some stupid woman and senseless daughter is maltreating their father. My dear run for your life, it runs in their blood to subdue men 1 Like |