lenposh:
I have a male friend Alfred Adewale by name, we have been friends for more than 3 years now. He is aware that I have a relationship same with me. He is never happy to see me and my boyfriend together but for me I don't ever want to go to his house if the lady is around because I feel jealous. He has been my friend since university days and now we are still friends but what do you think is happening? My Palmchat friends said am in love with him but I don't want to believe that because we have never had anything together even while in school. He was just my reading mate.

Adewale is my bestie, does it mean am in love with wale already or the feeling is still growing.
Please advise me, Should I just tell Wale how I feel or let go and move on with my boyfriend?

Ifakiland:
in other words u wanna break up with ur bf and move to wale abi? I pray someone breaks ur heart also.... oniranu. it's ur bf I blame dat allowed u av a male bestie.

Antina:
In your own case, u are in love. But it is very possible for a man and woman to be friends without being in love.

herbie27:
Is not possible.

Goat and yam can't be kept together.

With time in such friendship...feelings creep in.

stan241:


Not necessarily true though is it? Feelings are already there even as friends, it's the ability to not let those feelings develop to something else that's the hard part

herbie27:
My best friend is a guy, have knwn him for 5yrs now.

2 yrs onto our friendship even wen he knew i was in a relationship, he summoned the courage to tell me he has been in love with me...i turned him down.

2 months ago, he was to repeat the same thing, had to avoid meeting him, which he has been complaining of. he is totally nt attracted to me, just see him as a frd.

So i'm talking from experience too.

stan241:



Hence i said it takes all sorts of self control especially on the side of the guy it's not easy trust me but once you able to convince yourself that your friendship is worth preserving then it'd be hard to want to follow on such feelings.

herbie27:
keeping friendship with the opposite sex is a bad idea, though they're way different from girls, and we kind of love their company.

stan241:


Of course you love their company but I'd disagree on the "keeping friends with the opposite sex is a bad idea" part, people are different quite honestly and you'd be surprised how many guys can remain friends with you for long periods and not demand sex.

I've known my best friend since we were in the same class in primary4, also went to the same university together and not once has the issue of sex ever come up between us, we're literally siblings from different parents, and there is absolutely nothing we hide from each other,spent numerous weekends, days at each others place and nothing has ever happened we're that close people tend to think we're dating, I'm good pals with the bf and they've been together for years now, really i could go on and on

Basically like i said its all about self control and valuing your friendships with one another but hey different strokes for different folks i guess

herbie27:
whenever i keep the opposite sex as a friend for too long, they end up bring their feeling into it, have had 2 actually and same thing.

You're right though!.

herbie27:
@Antina, for my kind of person, i loved being around guys, cos they're 100% sincere in friendship, and fun to be around, i kind of build strong friendship around guys than my fellow girls, because of our wahala, i hate back bitting, and girls are fond of doing that.

If i make a guy my friend, nothing will make me to start developing feelings for such guys, and i tend to be very open with them, the first one i felt for him, wen i said i wasn't interested, he even made the sister to talk to me. and then my second encounter, hmm!.

Sexxkillz:
Can a cat and rat be best friends?

Debbywills:


Why didn't you give a straight response??

Ifakiland:
in other words u wanna break up with ur bf and move to wale abi? I pray someone breaks ur heart also.... oniranu. it's ur bf I blame dat allowed u av a male bestie.

Sexxkillz:
Can a cat and rat be best friends?

Sexxkillz:

I love parables.