kennybabs1980:
I met Viola at the university, very beautiful young lady. I loved her so much but she was always asking for money from me even as a struggling student. I tried to dissuade her from the attitude but her chant of "you're not caring" will always rent the air at each occasion l tried to. Always very confident about herself. After NYSC, I secured a job where I earned 60k per month, she was in her final year then. I told her about the job and her response was "is it 60k job you're celebrating"? I made it clear to her that I won't continue the relationship, she smiled and went away.

She later sent a message to me in the night of that day saying "60k is not enough to marry me, good riddance to bad rubbish". Fast forward six years with a wonderful wife and two beautiful kids, I bumped into her in a mutual friend father's funeral yesterday in Abeokuta, she wasn't looking as beautiful as she used to be, I greeted and exchange pleasantries with her, she responded grudgingly at first but later came back to tell me that "you're looking like a real man now". I asked her what she meant which she didn't respond to.


I heard from a friend who followed me to Ife from Abeokuta while driving down to my base at Akure today that she actually separated from her husband because the guy lost his job in the bank in 2014. What an unrepentant money monger is this Viola lady? I haven't stopped thanking my God that I made a wise decision to leave her in 2009. I pray she learn on time.

I have an advise for young ladies and gentlemen in the house, ladies change your mindset about money issues if its wrong like Viola's. Young men, shine your eyes and work very hard to earn a respectable living, cheers.

Men change your mindset about cooking issues.... Okbye

jopretty:
Most ladies think of now and not later. Ladies, if he's true to you, loves you, wants you for keeps but earning low or close to nothing now, your duty is to encourage him, love him and always pray, pray, and pray some more. Thank God for you, Op dear.

I know God has blessed you but for this comment he will bless you more...are there ladies that think like this is Nigeria??

I COMMENT MY RESERVE

intbizoil:
you should have still helped her, God brought you guys together again for a purpose to test you remember let no man he has stood let's he falls.

For what now, she made her bed, let her lay on it.

jopretty:
Most ladies think of now and not later. Ladies, if he's true to you, loves you, wants you for keeps but earning low or close to nothing now, your duty is to encourage him, love him and always pray, pray, and pray some more. Thank God for you, Op dear.

If your woman cannot cook, please what is your duty to her? "Why shouldn't she be able to cook?" That's what I thought. So, why should men not have money? Stop asking us to settle, thanks.

queenfav:
Please most guys are worse money mongers than ladies now.When many are looking for a woman that would their bills.I am not supportive of lazy women,but men..try and work hard!I met a guy recently and he was like "i thank God u are working class o,u wont be disturbing me for money". Bottomline,he clearly wanted to enjoy d privileges of dating without picking up some small bills occasionally.My point is,who no like better thing?Men and women alike,learn to work for your own money to avoid insult.

Lol at "picking up some small bills occasionally". And I won't be surprised if you're a feminist who'd demand to be treated equally.

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LynnPetra:



Every body digs Gold. Understand that.
The bolded unfortunately is not entirely correct.
Like I said, you can never fully understand the true character of a broke guy. People may change of course, for various reasons.

A bad man will be a bad man. I can confidently tell you from personal experience and from the experiences of friends and close aides and relatives. You can even read the daily lifestyle newspapers, lots of stories there to guide you.

Money does not change the core nature and behaviour of a man, it only enhances that behaviour - like a catalyst. I don't know if you understand what a catalyst is; if you do good enough.

naijafeminist:


If your woman cannot cook, please what is your duty to her? "Why shouldn't she be able to cook?" That's what I thought. So, why should men not have money? Stop asking us to settle, thanks.

Your parallelism is misguided. Cooking is a basic life skill for women and men. A whole lot, including luck, goes into being rich.

naijafeminist:


If your woman cannot cook, please what is your duty to her? "Why shouldn't she be able to cook?" That's what I thought. So, why should men not have money? Stop asking us to settle, thanks.

Why do you think a man who dates you should have money? Why can't you have the money? You are both humans with capable hands - anything wrong with your brains, hands, ability or business acumen?

adedayoa2:
guess he is a broke ass

Get thee behind me

naijafeminist:


Men change your mindset about cooking issues.... Okbye

Please if you do not know how to cook, go and learn how to cook and stop making an excuse on an unrelated issue. There is still time for you and there are many culinary schools in the country. Help yourself now.

LynnPetra:
Truth is I'm more scared of dating a broke guy . Most will show their real character when they breakthrough. Money get spirit.

okay..wait for d rich guy...

while keeping you in d house he will still go out and fvckk some pus$ies.. after all u met him rich...u never helped him up d ladder

Boss13 truthsayer007 lastpage KevinDein EdoBoy90 and others to come.Let me clarify a few things.A woman works..yeah,but it's the duty of a guy who is dating her to pick up some little bills occasionally.We are Africans,as much as a guy wud expect a girl to cook for him or help with chores when she visits,he should be in a position to do little nice things for her.I used that guy as an example because his actions showed that clearly he saw the fact that i work as an avenue to hold back his money even on dates he invited me to.I can feed myself,i pay my bills,everything in my house was gotten with my own money i earn from my job.So i don't belong to the class of women who wait for a man to bring momey before they can feed.There is a reason a man marries a woman.Nigerian men are slowly degenerating into gigolos and gold diggers.No woman is turning anyone into ATM.As a man,you should have the sense to do little things for a lady you are dating.Period!I am not a feminist,i believe a man should pay for a date he invited me to,i would never reach for my wallet except its a treat from me to him.So i wont apologize for my views!A man is wired to be a provider,that's why God didn't give men the duty of carrying a pregnancy for 9 months till delivery.Women only work nowadays due to civilization and educational advancements,it doesn't mean we are now men by virtue of that.A woman is meant to be a help meet ,emphasis on the word "HELP",not the breadwinner or sole provider.You guys should man up and stop looking for an easy way out.A man who is dating a lady and cannot do some nice things for her once in a while(not because he cannot afford to)but refuses to because she can afford to has a very long way to go...Times are hard,so i know d comments are borne from hunger and frustration.Please channel your anger into bettering yourselves!

kennybabs1980:
Thank you brother, she remained unrepentant even till now. I thank God o.

"you're looking like a real man now". I asked her what she meant which she didn't respond to.

glad u got delivered! how relieved, lonely, sad you must have felt when she walked! but with time you grew.

that said, i must say from your quote above, her money mongering penchant apart,

she got u in a limbo! got your balls and all your guts! gladly u gave it to her when u guys started( cos of her beauty and the fact that you didnt want to lose her to other guys)


even till now, she still got the mental advantage over you! considering her last statement and your response and the fact that she left u hanging without an answer ! ouch!


this should have been your perfect response to that demeaning statement:

HER: You look like a real man now
YOU: I've always been a real man, you were just too blind to see it ( with a calm calculated voice )... #ouch!
..........then walk on by b4 she wud wake up from the torpedo hit

To all the beautiful women in the world

Boss13:


Excuse me, please!!! Why should he pick your bills? It is a relationship - DATING that is the name and NOT A TRANSACTION. He is just a friend and not your father. Please get your priority straight. He is not your ticket to get out of poverty or sort out mundane bills, is it your responsibility to pay your bills because you incur them or will enjoy the benefits. Good for you that you work - SO SORT YOUR BILLS. Do you ask your female friends or siblings to sort your bills and you are demanding for it? No, you don't you humbly request and if they feel like it, they would assist and even your father, you still ask humbly, despite the fact that you are still his responsibility.

So why would you want to bother a young man who is still sorting himself out and you are arrogant about it. I shake my head. Please get yourself some exposure and understand what dating is all about. I think you have lost the main context of an intimate relationship, it is one enjoyed by both parties involved and not where one seeks to get paid for opening her legs.

Bruv dont waste ur time 89% of these girls are ignorant especially on Nl

I'm not perfect, God knows, but I strive to be a woman a man will forever be proud of. Thanks.

Destined2win:


You sound like a wonderful person. I choose to believe you are

hatbricker:
Get thee behind me

youre still a kid, you never see life

LynnPetra:
With the way women are working hard this days, I don't expect some stupid comments on here. In fact wetin una won offer to women these days? Many of you can't change your boxers, na woman pant una won Kon change?
As men dey find work na so women dey find work. Several idiots here get mama we dey pound fufu sell take feed them.


Unu n'eri nsi!

At the bolded - That is very possible, Nigeria is a poor country and there is nothing absolutely wrong if their mothers sell fufu to make sure that their sons have a good life and nothing wrong if their mothers pound yam or fufu to feed her children (her own children again). My mother proudly pounded yam and fufu for me and my siblings to eat and it was extremely tasty not the grinded ones we have in the market today.

Women who do this have been an epitome to behold and the values that still keeps the country. Only a good mother who wants the best for her sons and daughters will do such, she has alternatives - like sleeping around or abandoning the children. No, a true strong Nigerian/African woman wants the best for her children because she strongly believes that the future will certainly be good and not what ladies, like yourself, think of these days. I know your type, they work for me and I pity their boyfriends.

Hence judging from your rude and disgusting comment, I wonder what sacrifice you will make for your children. I thank God for my wife, apart from her very vivid beauty, she really has my best interest at heart and as matter of fact, I am going to my living room to give the mother of sweet beautiful children a kiss and thank God for bringing her my way and for not allowing me to meet people like yourself. Well me I no dey take nonsense sha and I lack the impatience to stay 5 seconds with girls who have lost their priorities.

Sorry dear, my comment isn't for you. Thanks too!

naijafeminist:


If your woman cannot cook, please what is your duty to her? "Why shouldn't she be able to cook?" That's what I thought. So, why should men not have money? Stop asking us to settle, thanks.

naija girls and ready made ..

Flashh:
I knew most ladies would avoid this thread, because they are birds of same feathers.

I have noticed most Nigerian girls have this gold-digging trait in their blood. It's up to you to be smart and wise with them.

Not all oh, my husband had nothing when we got married and I was very young, friends discourage me not to marry him today we are very OK, in fact I Thank God that I didn't underrate him, those my friends are telling me to put them in my prayers and that they are ready for anyone, money or no money love is the key.

LynnPetra:


Exactly
If viola married a "Dangote" after dumping him, he won't be writing all that.

lol. You don come again o.

Thanks for praying for me. And yes, there are still very good and reason ladies in Nigeria.

JayJustus:



I know God has blessed you but for this comment he will bless you more...are there ladies that think like this is Nigeria??

I COMMENT MY RESERVE

Thanks for praying for me. And yes, there are still very good and reasonable ladies in Nigeria.

JayJustus:



I know God has blessed you but for this comment he will bless you more...are there ladies that think like this is Nigeria??

I COMMENT MY RESERVE

Character is everything when it comes to marraige. Alot of patience is needed and a good attitude

You may have been saved by the bell

for me I really appreciate people you can struggle and come up with without some sort of false sense of control

Those who give you the space to speak your mind

We all overact but it's really important to love the good in others and give them a chance

intbizoil:
you should have still helped her, God brought you guys together again for a purpose to test you remember let no man he has stood let's he falls.

who are you self gan he should start dating her again tarr i forbid that before God will do am sure you be girl

dairykidd:


Bruv dont waste ur time 89% of these girls are ignorant especially on Nl

Well it is up to them. I am married. Marriage is a choice and not a do or die affair, but a sweet marriage is truly a bliss and one to die for. If they do not want to change their priorities, what is my business! However, they should not blame anybody, even their ex-boyfriends or ex-husbands but themselves.

I just strongly dislike Nigerian girls who are lazy to work but want all the goodies of life.

Boss13:


Please if you do not know how to cook, go and learn how to cook and stop making an excuse on an unrelated issue. There is still time for you and there are many culinary schools in the country. Help yourself now.

Why not start by helping yourself to make money and stop complaining?

Thanks so much!

ojuolu:
God bless you real good.

jopretty:
Sorry dear, my comment isn't for you. Thanks too!

Yh right, you cannot even argue your way out. Men wanting to eat their cake and have it. Men want food, women want money simple. Stop complaining . Now run along.

Thanks! And bless you too!!

EROMS38:
you are a wonderful woman I guess... women like u r difficult to come by in dis our badt country. Godbless you!