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My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm - Family (9) - Nairaland

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Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by ib22003(m): 7:53am On Sep 19, 2016
Huston1:
Please Nairalanders I need help because I am loosing my patience.
I have been married to my wife for 6years and I have never had dinner before 9PM. Sometimes I'm served dinner past 11pm. My wife doesn't have any job yet. I wake early every day because I have to bath and dress our two kids up in the morning while she makes their breakfast and prepare something for the lunch boxes. I drop the kids at school and go to work from there. I return home before 6pm and dinner is never ready. I have complained and complained and she makes adjustments for two days each time I complain. I got angry at a point and told her I will not eat her food after 7pm. That week, she acted on my instruction and I really ate at 7pm or just before 7:30pm. That is the only week I enjoyed dinner early. I have even developed pot belle due to eating late.
I got home early today and she started picking vegetables to make soup at about 3:30pm. This is 8pm and I still haven't eaten. I am so angry. I really see her busy working in kitchen but I don't know why it takes so long for the food to be ready. Not that she attends to the kids. I assist the kids in their homework and prepare them for bed. I'm very angry. Please advise.

May be she is an artist and the food is an art. i didn't see you complaining of it not been sweet. you said you see are busy in the kitchen, so the issue is that she takes her time. My advice is to try talking to her and politely ask her, if she can please adjust more often.
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by Donpippen: 7:57am On Sep 19, 2016
If her only issue is not cooking early, then count yourself a lucky man bro! Solution... Join her in the kitchen, u never know a little help here and there will hasten ur meal! Rather than making a fuss out of it
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by nwanioma(f): 8:07am On Sep 19, 2016
Switch Roles for a few days and show her it can be done even with you going to work! She would be ashamed and up her game.

1 Like

Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by Oghumu1(m): 8:10am On Sep 19, 2016
afroLAD:
You should be angry - a hungry man is an angry man.

Some women just don't understand that the way to a man's heart is through his belly. When you start eating from #ediblecatering now, they will be crying.
He's asking for solution, not giving him reasons why he should be angry the more.
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by Oghumu1(m): 8:15am On Sep 19, 2016
I'll advice u put a spy camera in the kitchen to know what takes her time there, and check if she uses her phone when cooking, that phone is a spirit.
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by Jaykan(m): 8:15am On Sep 19, 2016
Huston1:

She doesnt cook food everyday. When she knows she isngoing to make a meal that wont take much of her time, then she will not start early at all. Even when i remind her that it is getting late, she will tell me something like "Is it not just to make eba" but when she eventually gets into the kitchen she starts doing other things. Maybe that is when she will realise the kids will not eat eba and start frying plantain for them, or she will tell me she checked the soup and found there is no "Kpomo" or fish again because I dont like beef. Then she will start making jollof rice or something. She actually does a lot of things to make me happy. The timing is what I am not comfortable with. I have told her many a time she doesnt have respect for time. Anytime we have to get ready together and go out, I will tell her to start getting ready 2hrs before the time. She doesnt even make up. But we will still get to the place late. I go angry to church every sunday because even if she wakes up by 6am for a service of 9:30am, we still get to church late. I dont know what to do anymore. Whenever i talk to her, she makes adjustment for only few days and she is back to her old self. In the area of food, I feel I will make her feel bad if I start eating out but I dont know how to remedy this I am in. I will not forget to mention that she is a very nice wife and mother and very respectful. My family and friends like her. But this shortcoming of not respecting time is what I dont like. And you should all know that a woman who doesnt have respect for time is very untidy. And of course she is. I actually knew all these before I married her but I thought I can work on her and change these about her. Is this a cross I have to bear for the rest of my life because she doesnt compliment me the area of tideness and being timely. She scores Zero in being clean and timely. I employed someone who comes to clean my house everyday and wash too. I will not fail to mention that I still love her and she loves me with her life. She is very LOYAL, Caring, pretty, kindhearted and receptive. Family and friends enjoy her company. If she is not around, they misses her. I wish she can make little adjustment in these two areas of respecting time and being clean. There is nothing to write home about her in these two areas. I am always angry.
you can't have it all
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by HomeOfMe(f): 8:19am On Sep 19, 2016
Huston1:
Please Nairalanders I need help because I am loosing my patience.
I have been married to my wife for 6years and I have never had dinner before 9PM. Sometimes I'm served dinner past 11pm. My wife doesn't have any job yet. I wake early every day because I have to bath and dress our two kids up in the morning while she makes their breakfast and prepare something for the lunch boxes. I drop the kids at school and go to work from there. I return home before 6pm and dinner is never ready. I have complained and complained and she makes adjustments for two days each time I complain. I got angry at a point and told her I will not eat her food after 7pm. That week, she acted on my instruction and I really ate at 7pm or just before 7:30pm. That is the only week I enjoyed dinner early. I have even developed pot belle due to eating late.
I got home early today and she started picking vegetables to make soup at about 3:30pm. This is 8pm and I still haven't eaten. I am so angry. I really see her busy working in kitchen but I don't know why it takes so long for the food to be ready. Not that she attends to the kids. I assist the kids in their homework and prepare them for bed. I'm very angry. Please advise.
Can't she dedicate a particular in a month;cook different kinds of food,stew,egusi,agbono,or what ever kind of food you eat that can last you at least for 2weeks or more,store them in small bowls and put in the freezer. It'll be easier to take out a bowl and microwave. This is what I do because I run a business that also takes my time.
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by lokodon(m): 8:23am On Sep 19, 2016
Huston1:

She is good at putting off the cooker or reduce it in the process of cooking. I don't know why. Sometimes I walk into the kitchen and increase it. I have visited her family house and this is the same thing there. Breakfast is 11am in her family house. The annoying part is that you see her mom busy in the kitchen but the food is never out. The few times I slept in her family house, her mom wakes me up at night to say dinner is ready and she apologies for being late. I have watched my wife's mother cook. Sometimes I see her put off the cooker too. Washes plates and clean the kitchen up to 5 times before she finishes cooking. I don't really know how to work on my wife. This whole thing is affecting my kids too because they have to stay awake to eat before they go to bed. The worse part is that myself and my wife don't eat together most times because at the time she dishes my food, she goes back to kitchen to clean up. Sometimes when I wake up by 12 midnight or past twice, I see her in the parlor eating and watching Nigeria movie. Many times I force her to bed because she can actually stay awake till 1am
Didn't you guys date? This is why I encourage some closeness and staying together before marriage. Or did you overlook this hoping she would change? If so, just relax and keep working on her. Her biological clock has been set to that cycle. Resetting biological clocks is not easy but it's possible. If you want her to change, be firm on your position. Or, try helping her out in the kitchen and let her take up some of the things you do.
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by lokodon(m): 8:25am On Sep 19, 2016
HomeOfMe:
Can't she dedicate a particular in a month;cook different kinds of food,stew,egusi,agbono,or what ever kind of food you eat that can last you at least for 2weeks or more,store them in small bowls and put in the freezer. It'll be easier to take out a bowl and microwave. This is what I do because I run a business that also takes my time.
I am even wondering why the cooking is everyday.
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by lokodon(m): 8:33am On Sep 19, 2016
Dinner by 1am? That one na early breakfast
bigerboy200:

Lol... grin angry cheesy grin Eating late causes pot belly? I can't even remember when last I ate dinner b4 10 pm...these days I eat by 11, 12 pm. .even ate dinner 1 am last week (cos of d nature of my work) yet I don't have pot belly...though I do sit ups like thrice a week and play competitive soccer every Saturday. ....do light work out on ur belly and d fear of pot belly will go even when married...
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by 9jageekz(m): 8:33am On Sep 19, 2016
Since, you know she dawdle when preparing her meal. you should advise her the health implications of late night meal with that she might probably change..

On the other hand, Picture of your Pot Belle or IdontBlivIt..
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by oyomii(f): 8:34am On Sep 19, 2016
muri4mig:

You will have make sense If you don't add pray too. Pray for what exactly? That God should make her cook early? We can pray over anything in this part of the world. Nigerians and prayer are like....

My brother u av no idea oooo. I believe in prayer. I don't mean d "die die die" stuff. If u r a Christain u'd understand dat God is interested in "Every" area of our life. U can simply "talk" to him. #prayerchangesthings. I also didn't say pray nd cross ur legs. U still av to put ur faith to work.
BTW This is my opinion. U get ur own I get my own.
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by oyomii(f): 8:35am On Sep 19, 2016
bigerboy200:

What is it to pray about?


Everything brother.

1 Like

Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by oyomii(f): 8:36am On Sep 19, 2016
Akaujaa:


Seems like a familiar face in Asaba.


Probably a look alike.
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by oyomii(f): 8:36am On Sep 19, 2016
ibietela2:


Nigerians and religion, what has prayer got to do with this?



Effritin ooo broda. Effritin.
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by oyomii(f): 8:37am On Sep 19, 2016
achieverme:


Thank you lady. You "spoke" my mind.

The problem is if somebori says he wants to meet u now, u will be telling somebori no no no.

Why is that sef?



Y will somebori want to see me na? Nd u correct oooo. it's no no no.
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by Walexsammy(m): 8:38am On Sep 19, 2016
Richy4:
I know it is really annoying... But bro, in every marriage, there must be something u have to over look.... I guess this one could be it... if you do not want to eat late, then make provision for what you will eat when you get home ie buying some snack or take away.... when she finally finished cooking, if u want u can eat. if not just say u are ok...

The way i see it, she might be needing a washing machine and a vacuum cleaner.... I might be wrong though but after washing your cloth, the kids, and hers.... then clean a messy house where two kids are living everyday, she will get exhausted... by the time she starts cooking for u, it might get a bit late... but not as late as 11 as u were painting it... what is she cooking tortoise meat?
Bro you sure u carefully read hiis comments? Did u also read where he said, he hires cleaners to tidy up the house and wash cloths too?
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by Nobody: 8:39am On Sep 19, 2016
Tell her to stop watching Telemundo, that crappy program instills the spirit of laziness and rebellion in Nigerian women. angry
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by blesoh(f): 8:42am On Sep 19, 2016
Oga your wife is the type that hates cooking or the slow type that cooks, why not join her in the kitchen. Cooking can be stressful for some so you can make it fast by helping out.
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by achieverme(m): 8:45am On Sep 19, 2016
oyomii:




Y will somebori want to see me na? Nd u correct oooo. it's no no no.

You can't say nah. Somebori may have good reason nah. And it is not always good to say no no no.
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by oyomii(f): 8:47am On Sep 19, 2016
achieverme:


You can't say nah. Somebori may have good reason nah. And it is not always good to say no no no.



Somebori I af said no already. And d ability to say no is a virtue oooo.
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by achieverme(m): 8:50am On Sep 19, 2016
oyomii:




Somebori I af said no already. And d ability to say no is a virtue oooo.

No, the ability to hear somebori out before saying no no no is the real virtue.

Saying no no no before hearing somebori out is tantamount to hurried decision making, which may be erroneous and originating in hasty generalization.
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by oyomii(f): 8:52am On Sep 19, 2016
achieverme:


No, the ability to hear somebori out before saying no no no is the real virtue.

Saying no no no before hearing somebori out is tantamount to hurried decision making, which may be erroneous and originating in hasty generalization.


Gbam.he af carry dictionary. Broda Oya email me. Bt...
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by breakeven: 8:54am On Sep 19, 2016
Uhmm! I suspect too much television, gossiping or outright lazyness. Please continue to make her see reason to do what is right. Divorce is out of the question because children are already involved. If you are a christian, see your pastor for counselling. And pray hard for God intervention.
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by Origin(f): 9:03am On Sep 19, 2016
She has been doing it for six years and you can't take a hint. Please get a cook.
Also get her a job. That alone could lead to depression. Full time housewife is depressing.


.... .Dear I want to buy pant, ehn makeup, ehn transport.


Best sit together and discuss find out what's going on with your left rib.
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by Dyt(f): 9:08am On Sep 19, 2016
jaybillionaire:
Idayatudeen cheesy wink

Ehn na
Abi you sef no dey manage time well?
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by moyin2009: 9:13am On Sep 19, 2016
Since she doesn't work, tell her to get your food ready by 6pm. and by 6:30pm she must not border herself to cook again. you only think of yourself how about the children that had returned from school since 4pm and could not eat until 7:30pm by your set time. it is not healthy at all for you, the kids and even herself to be candid.
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by amliftedhigher: 9:15am On Sep 19, 2016
Huston1:
Thanks. I will try this.
please stick to your ultimatum ok. My fiancee knows that immediately is 6:30pm I can only eat fruit and vegetables except I demanded to eat the food late.. May be you guys did not date?
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by jashar(f): 9:20am On Sep 19, 2016
jaybillionaire:
Sth tells me Ull make a good wife for my friend, and never mind he won't divorce u grin grin


You sure say that your naughty friend dey find wife?

cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy

If wife wake up late one morning, by afternoon na divorce cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy

Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by Anextin(f): 9:21am On Sep 19, 2016
dairykidd:
I hate lazy ppl especially lazy women if i were u i would just take my kids out for dinner every evening as i get back home make only she dey chop d late night meals..how can u raise kids like that this is tragic then u will wake up uncomfortable after eating close to midnight.Bruv, u ar damaging ur health and that of ur kids..do takeouts for 2 wks and see if she would get d message,if not abeg hold family meeting.She needs to learn by fire by force!!!
Easy Oga, the woman is not lazy, if u read the mentions, the husband said even in their family home that's how the wife's mum cooks, she only learnt from home, so it's not her fault. Any woman who cleans while cooking and after cooking is damn neat n strong. She's good just need to set a new way and pattern for her family. She got all that from her mum and thts how she was raised so it will be a little hard to shield, but I believe with love n understanding she will improve.
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by Akaujaa(m): 9:21am On Sep 19, 2016
oyomii:


Probably a look alike.
Maybe, though
Re: My Wife Doesn't Work Yet Dinner Is Never Ready Before 9pm by Nobody: 9:26am On Sep 19, 2016
I feel your pain, if only my own husband could help me in the morning with the kids Dat will be great. Sorry to say but ur wife is just too slow in doing things. I could take 2hrs most to finish cooking 2 different pots of soup, sometimes lets than Dat. Set a time limit for your dinner party if it's past Dat time don't eat her food. I I promise you she will change.

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