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Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. - Family - Nairaland

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Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by Nobody: 3:56pm On Oct 04, 2016
I noticed 80% of our Nigerian mother in-laws threat their daughter in-laws badly unlike their foreign counterparts, and this trend is so common,once a man says he wants to take you to see his parents instead of excitement a certain fear creeps in.
personally i'm not scared of meeting the man's father because i assume father's trust their sons to have made the right choices, but for the mothers is not usually the same, was able to ask someone if she felt same and she confessed feeling worse. grin
Why are our Nigerian mother in-laws so mean?.
Need your contributions, and Ladies how do you feel when getting to meet them?.

Cc: Aderola15.
Talk2Bella.
IamNawty.
Laveda.

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by Nobody: 3:58pm On Oct 04, 2016
Finally it did make front page cheesy


My aunt always gives praise to God that her mother in-law is no longer alive grin grin



Y'all disturbing ma mentions tho cheesy cheesy angry angry

10 Likes

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by Nobody: 4:01pm On Oct 04, 2016
JUSTbuchi:
.


Just in case
Just in case it makes fp. grin Air your views joor!.

2 Likes

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by Inspectahdeck(m): 4:13pm On Oct 04, 2016
You will understand more when you turn into a mother-in-law in future.

The so called good ones (mother-in-law) use wisdom to manage their daughter-in-law.

The connection between mothers and their boys is so high they get carried away especially when the wife isn't too good (in terms of behaviour and care).




Benita27:
I noticed 80% of our Nigerian mother in-laws threat their daughter in-laws badly unlike their foreign counterparts, and this trend is so common,once a man says he wants to take you to see his parents instead of excitement a certain fear creeps in.
personally i'm not scared of meeting the man's father because i assume father's trust their sons to have made the right choices, but for the mothers is not usually the same, was able to ask someone if she felt same and she confessed feeling worse. grin
Why are our Nigerian mother in-laws so mean?.
Need your contributions, and Ladies how do you feel when getting to meet them?.

73 Likes 4 Shares

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by Talk2Bella(f): 4:15pm On Oct 04, 2016
Benita27:
I noticed 80% of our Nigerian mother in-laws threat their daughter in-laws badly unlike their foreign counterparts, and this trend is so common,once a man says he wants to take you to see his parents instead of excitement a certain fear creeps in.
personally i'm not scared of meeting the man's father because i assume father's trust their sons to have made the right choices, but for the mothers is not usually the same, was able to ask someone if she felt same and she confessed feeling worse. grin
Why are our Nigerian mother in-laws so mean?.
Need your contributions, and Ladies how do you feel when getting to meet them?.

Cc: Aderola15.
Talk2Bella.
IamNawty.
Laveda.

It's in our genetic code grin especially if he's an only son or only child, I de pity my brother babes dem de hear weeen anytime my mother sets eyes on them cheesy

22 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by Nobody: 4:17pm On Oct 04, 2016
Inspectahdeck:
You will understand more when you turn into a mother-in-law in future.

The so called good ones (mother-in-law) use wisdom to manage their daughter-in-law.

The connection between mothers and their boys is so high they get carried away especially when the wife isn't too good (in terms of behaviour and care).




Lol.
I intend being a good mother in-law.
Some will find out their son's wives are very good but they're just insatiable, and can't be pleased.

26 Likes

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by Nobody: 4:20pm On Oct 04, 2016
Talk2Bella:


It's in our genetic code grin especially if he's an only son or only child, I de pity my brother babes dem de hear weeen anytime my mother sets eyes on them cheesy
I feel for women who marry only sons, so much is expected of them.
I don't want. grin

6 Likes

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by Talk2Bella(f): 4:22pm On Oct 04, 2016
When it gets to our turn that's how it will be, good intentions are overly overrated we will think we're doing it in his best interest before you know daughter inlaw go just de plan us grin

22 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by Talk2Bella(f): 4:23pm On Oct 04, 2016
Benita27:
I feel for women who marry only sons, so much is expected of them.
I don't want. grin

I just saw a vision for you grin

Nah only son and only child u go marry cheesy cheesy

31 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by babyfaceafrica: 4:24pm On Oct 04, 2016
it is in most women gene,emotional clinging..."it is my own alone".........when even the wife begets her own son ,she will most likely do that again...most women have this claimish attitude and attachmenet towards children especially male.Wetin concern papa,i know of a man who has never visited his son since he got married,na through phone or the son comes to his house..no time....Women should look within themselves

49 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by ammyluv2002(f): 4:27pm On Oct 04, 2016
I think, it has to do with so much love and attachment to the guy especially if he's the only son/child. The mother becomes madly in love with her son to a point of her getting jealous of the son's wife. She doesn't want to let go of him, there's this fear of "my son will not love me anymore"


Secondly, if she's not in support of her son getting married to the lady ....OYO is her case. She will never love her except God touches her heart.

19 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by Nobody: 4:27pm On Oct 04, 2016
Not all mother-in-laws tho, I've had an experience smiley

2 Likes

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by Nobody: 4:28pm On Oct 04, 2016
Talk2Bella:


I just saw a vision for you grin

Nah only son and only child u go marry cheesy cheesy
If his mum is as kind as i'm no problem then. grin
Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by Nobody: 4:29pm On Oct 04, 2016
ItsQuinn:
Not all mother-in-laws tho, speaking from experience smiley
Didn't say all.
We just have more of the mean ones to the understandable ones.

3 Likes

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by Nobody: 4:32pm On Oct 04, 2016
ammyluv2002:
I think, it has to do with so much love and attachment to the guy especially if he's the only son/child. The mother becomes madly in love with her son to a point of her getting jealous of the son's wife. She doesn't want to let go of him, there's this fear of "my son will not love me anymore"


Secondly, if she's not in support of her son getting married to the lady ....OYO is her case. She will never love her except God touches her heart.
Your last statement is kind of funny. grin
Nice one.
Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by Nobody: 4:33pm On Oct 04, 2016
True smiley
Benita27:
Didn't say all.
We just have more of the mean ones to the understandable ones.
Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by Nobody: 4:34pm On Oct 04, 2016
babyfaceafrica:
it is in most women gene,emotional clinging..."it is my own alone".........when even the wife begets her own son ,she will most likely do that again...most women have this claimish attitude and attachmenet towards children especially maile.Wetin concern papa,i know of a man who has never visited his son since he got married,na through phone or the son comes to his house..no time....Women should look within themselves
That's why i love the men.
They just care less.

5 Likes

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by raumdeuter: 4:35pm On Oct 04, 2016
The OP is really naive



ABove is a picture of an American movie about Mother in law probllems, In the OP opinion they probably learnt it from Nigerians

The question you should be asking is why women always have problems with themselves. Why dont we hear of husband vs fatherinlaw problems

The mother inlaws they are complaining about today also complained about their own mother inlaws like 30yrs ago, In another 30yrs another set of wifes would be complaining about this same set of women who are complaining abut their mother inlaws

92 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by Nobody: 4:42pm On Oct 04, 2016
raumdeuter:
The Op is really naive



ABove is a picture of an American movie about Mother in law probllems, In the OP opinion they probably learnt it from Nigerians

The question you should be asking is why women always have problems with themselves. Why dont we hear of husband vs fatherinlaw problems

The mother inlaws they are complaining about today also complained about their own mother inlaws like 30yrs ago, In another 30yrs another set of wifes would be complaining about this same set of women who are complaining abut their mother inlaws
Really?.

1 Like

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by raumdeuter: 4:44pm On Oct 04, 2016
Benita27:
Really?.

Benita27:
[i]I noticed 80% of our Nigerian mother in-laws threat their daughter in-laws badly unlike their foreign counterparts, and this trend is so common,once a man says he wants to take you to see his parents instead of excitement a certain fear creeps in.

Why are our Nigerian mother in-laws so mean?.
Need your contributions, and Ladies how do you feel when getting to meet them?.
.
For you to think this is a Nigerian problem you must be either naive or unexposed

28 Likes

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by Nobody: 4:45pm On Oct 04, 2016
Talk2Bella:
When it gets to our turn that's how it will be, good intentions are overly overrated we will think we're doing it in his best interest before you know daughter inlaw go just de plan us grin
So is genetic?. grin

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by Nobody: 4:49pm On Oct 04, 2016
raumdeuter:


For you to think this is a Nigerian problem you must be either naive or unexposed
Neither of the above mentioned.
Their foreign counterparts aren't as mean as our Nigerian mother-inlaws are.
You're referring me to a movie of a mean mother in-law like i haven't seen one.
They're more liberal and understand what space means in a marriage.

10 Likes

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by raumdeuter: 4:52pm On Oct 04, 2016
Benita27:
Neither of the above mentioned.
Their foreign counterparts aren't as mean as our Nigerian mother-inlaws are.
You're referring me to a movie of mean mother in-law like i haven't seen one.
They're more liberal and understand what space means in a marriage.

This is why I think you are not exposed, Probably havent left Nigeria before and think foreigners are angels

These are links from foreign sites discussing issues with Mother in laws

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/news/mother-in-law-problems/
http://content.time.com/time/world/article/0,8599,1863282,00.html
https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/relationship-and-family-issues/mother-in-law-causing-problems

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/domestic-intelligence/200908/in-law-conflict-and-troubled-marriages

A new study from the University of Cambridge Center for Family Research and an organization called the Stand Alone Institute has found that rifts between parents and their son’s wife are among the most common reasons for family estrangement.

http://nypost.com/2016/01/10/most-family-rifts-caused-by-mans-wife-and-mother-hating-each-other/

Maybe you should tell us they sampled Nigerians or these foreigners learnt it from Nigerians

28 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by Nobody: 4:57pm On Oct 04, 2016
raumdeuter:


This is why I think you are not exposed, Probably havent left Nigeria before and think foreigners are angels

These are links from foreign sites discussing issues with Mother in laws

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/news/mother-in-law-problems/
http://content.time.com/time/world/article/0,8599,1863282,00.html
https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/relationship-and-family-issues/mother-in-law-causing-problems

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/domestic-intelligence/200908/in-law-conflict-and-troubled-marriages

A new study from the University of Cambridge Center for Family Research and an organization called the Stand Alone Institute has found that rifts between parents and their son’s wife are among the most common reasons for family estrangement.

http://nypost.com/2016/01/10/most-family-rifts-caused-by-mans-wife-and-mother-hating-each-other/

Maybe you should tell us they sampled Nigerians or these foreigners learnt it from Nigerians
I am not of the opinion that foreigners are "angles", they're more liberal.
And the issue of "mean mother in-laws" is very common here.

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by 5minsmadness: 4:57pm On Oct 04, 2016
Benita27:
Neither of the above mentioned.
Their foreign counterparts aren't as mean as our Nigerian mother-inlaws are.
You're referring me to a movie of a mean mother in-law like i haven't seen one.
They're more liberal and understand what space means in a marriage.

Hahhahahaha!
Hhaahahaaahahahaa!



You have NO IDEA cry

15 Likes

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by Nobody: 4:59pm On Oct 04, 2016
5minsmadness:


Hahhahahaha!
Hhaahahaaahahahaa!



You have NO IDEA cry
School me.
Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by raumdeuter: 5:05pm On Oct 04, 2016
Benita27:
I am not of the opinion that foreigners are "angles", they're more liberal.
And the issue of "mean mother in-laws" is very common here.

OP where do you live? If you are abroad, go to a married women gathering and hear what they discuss about most

If in Naija Go online go to foreign chat forums of married women and search for the thing they complain about the most

9 Likes

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by Nobody: 5:07pm On Oct 04, 2016
raumdeuter:


OP where do you live? If you are abroad, go to a married women gathering and hear what they discuss about most

If in Naija Go online go to foreign chat forums of married women and search for the thing they complain about the most
I am in Naija.
Thanks for your opinion.
Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by 5minsmadness: 5:12pm On Oct 04, 2016
Benita27:
School me.

2 examples,
My cousin and my friend.

My cousin: Nice family, generous family, it was only when the boy declared his love for her we found out his mom was a fierce racist! They could be boyfriend and girlfriend as long as he didnt bring the black girl home to the family. I guess in a way it doesnt count cos the y finally didnt get married cos of her. Later heard the boy brought home and irish chic and the mom brought the house down in a rage. The guy is still single.

My friend. Married the boy. Caucasian mother in law moved in for two weeks. She saw hell. The woman was unbearable and unappeasable, kept on making condescendin remarks about how no girl was good enough for her Ronald... Only ate when thr guy was around... Made a statement once that suggested she was trying to poison her by putting something in her coffee...complained about the kitchen, complained about everything... Then asked to stay another two weeks to take good care of her son. My friend was a nervous wreck before the woman left. And this was in the UK o, not naija.

27 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by Nobody: 5:14pm On Oct 04, 2016
5minsmadness:


2 examples,
My cousin and my friend.

My cousin: Nice family, generous family, it was only when the boy declared his love for her we found out his mom was a fierce racist! They could be boyfriend and girlfriend as long as he didnt bring the black girl home to the family. I guess in a way it doesnt count cos the y finally didnt get married cos of her. Later heard the boy brought home and irish chic and the mom brought the house down in a rage. The guy is still single.

My friend. Married the boy. Caucasian mother in law moved in for two weeks. She saw hell. The woman was unbearable and unappeasable, kept on making condescendin remarks about how no girl was good enough for her Ronald... Only ate when thr guy was around... Made a statement once that suggested she was trying to poison her by putting something in her coffee...complained about the kitchen, complained about everything... Then asked to stay another two weeks to take good care of her son. My friend was a nervous wreck before the woman left. And this was in the UK o, not naija.
OK!.
Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by NevetsIbot(m): 5:15pm On Oct 04, 2016
Op. I'm not even married yet, mum is already listing things she'd have my wife do for me..... I'm just looking at her

22 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Are Nigerian Mother In-laws Too Mean Towards Their Daughter In-laws?. by raumdeuter: 5:21pm On Oct 04, 2016
5minsmadness:


2 examples,
My cousin and my friend.

My cousin: Nice family, generous family, it was only when the boy declared his love for her we found out his mom was a fierce racist! They could be boyfriend and girlfriend as long as he didnt bring the black girl home to the family. I guess in a way it doesnt count cos the y finally didnt get married cos of her. Later heard the boy brought home and irish chic and the mom brought the house down in a rage. The guy is still single.

My friend. Married the boy. Caucasian mother in law moved in for two weeks. She saw hell. The woman was unbearable and unappeasable, kept on making condescendin remarks about how no girl was good enough for her Ronald... Only ate when thr guy was around... Made a statement once that suggested she was trying to poison her by putting something in her coffee...complained about the kitchen, complained about everything... Then asked to stay another two weeks to take good care of her son. My friend was a nervous wreck before the woman left. And this was in the UK o, not naija.

I have a friend whose mother didnt attend his wedding because she did not approve of the girl he is getting married to

Among these people they have segregation based on religious beliefs, your family's financial background, social beliefs, what part of the country you are from, what level of education.

8 Likes

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