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Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? - Religion (6) - Nairaland

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Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by OLAADEGBU(m): 11:25pm On Oct 08, 2016
TV01:


...a dimwit with gender dysphoria grin

More evidence that you are not only an abuser but also a bully.

TV01:


What you are on about? What your point is. Is divorce permitted scripturally - for any reason? What is the scriptural response to "abuse" - of any kind?

Answer the question and move on. Is abuse scriptural? undecided

TV01:


...oh dearie me...I'm going to have to get the pictures out grin grin grin grin grin

Better do. cool

TV01:


...it is you who has trivialised marriage - which is till death do part - according to the bible. By seeming to suggest that divorce should be allowed for abuse - playing to the gallery of the "worship ma feelins" crowd grin.

Knowing what the bible says, and being unable to refute or respond affirming your implicit suggestion, in the face of the sound exegesis you have been hose-piped with cool, you are now trying to claim "trivialisation". It's the old "has God truly said" ruse. It will not work here cool.

TV01:


The bible does not permit dissolution of a consummated marital union for any reason. True Christians will not abuse their spouses - in the event of "problems", they will seek, forgiveness, healing and restoration, not divorce.

I've heard you that the bible does not permit dissolution of a consummated marriage but are you a true Christian? Do you abuse your spouse?

TV01:


You know full well the bible does not permit divorce, but you pivoted your OP on divorce. Not the basis of solid marriages at foundation, how to ensure unions are robust, or remedies for abuse, incipient or aggravated.

There's nothing stopping you from showing how unions can be made robust.

TV01:


That's why you got lots of applause from assorted "feelins chasers" and twice divorced husband snatchers grin - which is presumably what you were after undecided. You have craftily questioned the holy writ, debased true marriage, pushed divorce and valorised abuse. Shame on you angry.

See pot calling kettle black.

TV01:


You entertain me? You are for my amusement. I'm toying with you - although fast tiring of that undecided.


TV

Keep playing to the gallery.

1 Like

Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by OLAADEGBU(m): 11:27pm On Oct 08, 2016
orunto27:


Yes, you're right. That's the reason for the case in the first instance. Reporting is Prayer. Request for Return to Status quo.

You mean reporting the matter to Baba God?
Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by OLAADEGBU(m): 11:28pm On Oct 08, 2016
Mindfulness:


I feel perfectly healthy so I will stay away.

Marriage was instituted by God, are you saying you're staying away? undecided
Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by OLAADEGBU(m): 11:30pm On Oct 08, 2016
Mindfulness:


To each their own. wink

I only hope Christians are true to their profession and not only when it comes to not divorcing.

1 Like

Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by OLAADEGBU(m): 11:32pm On Oct 08, 2016
missjo:


Thought so too.

I can only hope that he is not as bad as he is portraying himself here.
Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by orunto27: 7:07am On Oct 09, 2016
That's Prayer. Reporting to Aba Father is confirming Him as "The Only Reason for doing What we do all the Time".
Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by Nobody: 10:45am On Oct 09, 2016
OLAADEGBU:


Apologies accepted, don't do that again. wink
Yes, uncle. grin

As for TV he's got no leg to stand on. cool
You and TV have the same beliefs from what I know of you both, at least as regards divorce, and your comments on this thread.
Referring to him as an abuser because he approaches the topic dispassionately is womanly. Is there anything he has said that you do not believe in? If so, please it/them out.
Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by TV01(m): 7:35pm On Oct 09, 2016
Timbuktou:
You and TV have the same beliefs from what I know of you both, at least as regards divorce, and your comments on this thread. Referring to him as an abuser because he approaches the topic dispassionately is womanly. Is there anything he has said that you do not believe in? If so, please it/them out.
On the face of it maybe, but in action Olaadegbu is neither fish nor fowl. He knows the truth of Gods word. No divorce, but he ardently desires the approval of the unrepentant serial divorcees and fornicators who have swarmed this thread, hence him not making that assertion ab initio.

Instead making it sound like divorce is a solution to the nebulously framed "abuse" he presented. Wolf in sheeps clothing grin. What Ola should have done - if not for his love of applause & validation from men - is too have made the biblical position clear, and presented biblically based criteria to avoid abuse foundationally, or remedy it should it occur post nuptials.

Now he's stuck, so he's making it personal - don't they all undecided - trying to paint me as an abuser grin. After I clearly stated that abuse has no place in a Christian marriage, and should not actually be found in any well-constituted union. Let me go and bring pictures cheesy

TV01:
You are still flailing about trying to make sense of this. Firstly, a Christian marriage built on the right foundations will not have such serious issues. Non-Christian marriages sef.
TV01:
...and following, is there any Chriistian writ to marry or conduct marriage with abuse as a subtext undecided?
TV01:
Are you irretrievably dull cheesy? What you wrote up there is akin to saying "my bank doesn't allow overdrafts, therefore it's ok to steal" grin. Let me ask you - does the bible permit or condone abuse?
TV01:
If abuse - as opposed to low level conflict - occurs in a marriage, spouses should seek immediate resolution. Even low level conflict should not be a feature of a healthy marriage, let alone a christian one. Love & submission. How hard is that undecided?

OLAADEGBU:
More evidence that you are not only an abuser but also a bully. Answer the question and move on. Is abuse scriptural? undecided

I've heard you that the bible does not permit dissolution of a consummated marriage but are you a true Christian? Do you abuse your spouse?
Querying my marriage grin - The serial divorcee and husband rustler he smooches with, and embraces the ignorant fornicator. Ask missjo for the spade when she's done!


TV
Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by Nobody: 8:02pm On Oct 09, 2016
TV01:

On the face of it maybe, but in action Olaadegbu is neither fish nor fowl. He knows the truth of Gods word. No divorce, but he ardently desires the approval of the unrepentant serial divorcees and fornicators who have swarmed this thread, hence him not making that assertion ab initio.

Instead making it sound like divorce is a solution to the nebulously framed "abuse" he presented. Wolf in sheeps clothing grin. What Ola should have done - if not for his love of applause & validation from men - is too have made the biblical position clear, and presented biblically based criteria to avoid abuse foundationally, or remedy it should it occur post nuptials.

Now he's stuck, so he's making it personal - don't they all undecided - trying to paint me as an abuser grin. After I clearly stated that abuse has no place in a Christian marriage, and should not actually be found in any well-constituted union. Let me go and bring pictures cheesy




Querying my marriage grin - The serial divorcee and husband rustler he smooches with, and embraces the ignorant fornicator. Ask missjo for the spade when she's done!


TV




Baba, which one be husband-rustler again? grin.

Per Adegbulu, he did seem biased toward women, which is why I'd assumed he actually is in support of divorce. I just gave him the benefit of the doubt of trying to pass the message indirectly. Sort of him playing devil's advocate, no pun intended.

OLAADEGBU, I ask again, what makes TV an abuser? Or does he have to argue the Bible apologetically like you seem to be doing. Seeming to not have confidence in what you espouse?
Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by TV01(m): 8:17pm On Oct 09, 2016
Timbuktou:
Baba, which one be husband-rustler again? grin.
Back in the wild west, the sentence for rustling - horses or cattle - was capital. Even if we no longer stone them, they shouldn't be allowed in polite company - not to mention casually taking the scriptures into their "chop and clean" mouths angry

Timbuktou:
Per Adegbulu, he did seem biased toward women, which is why I'd assumed he actually is in support of divorce. I just gave him the benefit of the doubt of trying to pass the message indirectly. Sort of him playing devil's advocate, no pun intended.
You shouldn't have retracted - he subtly hinted at it - or made it ambiguous - 5 time on the first page alone. Like I said, wolf. Pickabeau1 put it best, Christianity and feminism are like oil and water. He best choose who he wants to serve and do it wholeheartedly.

Timbuktou:
OLAADEGBU, I ask again, what makes TV an abuser? Or does he have to argue the Bible apologetically like you seem to be doing. Seeming to not have confidence in what you espouse?
I'm an abuser because I make no bones about presenting the bible as I truly believe it - even if wrong, I am happy to be challenged. Note how he has not made one reference to scripture. Baba nla feel good preacher grin.


TV
Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by Nobody: 8:35pm On Oct 09, 2016
TV01:
Back in the wild west, the sentence for rustling - horses or cattle - was capital. Even if we no longer stone them, they shouldn't be allowed in polite company - not to mention casually taking the scriptures into their "chop and clean" mouths angry

Fully agree with the bolded. But what is "polite conversation" these days. Isn't it a sign of progressive wisdom to accept these rustlers as just people going after what they want? Isn't that the problem with this section? The sharp divergence of marital values? Isn't that why you're a "misogynist"?

You shouldn't have retracted - he subtly hinted at it - or made it ambiguous - 5 time on the first page alone. Like I said, wolf. Pickabeau1 put it best, Christianity and feminism are like oil and water. He best choose who he wants to serve and do it wholeheartedly.

I could have pressed, but I was frankly in ni mood to argue, haven't been in a while. And as he has shown, he'll just go the Mindfulness route, which I have no patience for.

I'm an abuser because I make no bones about presenting the bible as I truly believe it - even if wrong, I am happy to be challenged. Note how he has not made one reference to scripture. Baba nla feel good preacher grin.


TV
Maybe he's trying to solicit offerings? grin. You can't upset the people's feelz too much.
Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by TV01(m): 9:00pm On Oct 09, 2016
Timbuktou:
Maybe he's trying to solicit offerings? grin. You can't upset the people's feelz too much.
Maybe offerings = "Likes"; sadder than I imagined grin.

On another note, my man started school this past September. He's doing so well I'm made up. Chip off the old block cool


TV
Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by Nobody: 9:30pm On Oct 09, 2016
TV01:

Maybe offerings = "Likes"; sadder than I imagined grin.

On another note, my man started school this past September. He's doing so well I'm made up. Chip off the old block cool


TV




You know how it is with them Francesca types na. grin. The hunt for the ever fickle female validation will run him mad eventually.

Great news, bruv. I pray he excels beyond your hopes. It's always comforting to see the next generation of soldiers being groomed. With the rise of foolishness, too many effete men running around these days. Send regards from me, and the Queen and Princess, of course.

1 Like

Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by TV01(m): 9:37pm On Oct 09, 2016
Timbuktou:
Great news, bruv. I pray he excels beyond your hopes. It's always comforting to see the next generation of soldiers being groomed. With the rise of foolishness, too many effete men running around these days. Send regards from me, and the Queen and Princess, of course.
Graciás - may the Lord bless us in our generations - even those yet unseen - and give us the grace to raise our sons to "quit themselves like men" and raise accomplished daughters to become the choice and cherish of such men".

TV
Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by Nobody: 9:42pm On Oct 09, 2016
TV01:

Graciás - may the Lord bless us in our generations - even those yet unseen - and give us the grace to raise our sons to "quit themselves like men" and raise accomplished daughters to become the choice and cherish of such men".

TV


Amen. Adura nla. So shall it be.

1 Like

Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by missjo(f): 12:56pm On Oct 10, 2016
TV01:

Querying my marriage grin - The serial divorcee and husband rustler he smooches with, and embraces the ignorant fornicator. Ask missjo for the spade when she's done!


TV

I'm very sorry to have quoted you earlier trying to relate your Christian values with the way you insult,talkdown,and bully people here. I was genuinely curious,but it's obvious your ego got a hit and now you can't get over it even after I wished you a lovely week.

Do have a lovely week once more.

3 Likes

Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by missjo(f): 12:58pm On Oct 10, 2016
OLAADEGBU:


I can only hope that he is not as bad as he is portraying himself here.
He may not be,however he does have insecurities.

3 Likes

Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by TV01(m): 6:05pm On Oct 11, 2016
missjo:

I'm very sorry to have quoted you earlier trying to relate your Christian values with the way you insult,talkdown,and bully people here. I was genuinely curious,but it's obvious your ego got a hit and now you can't get over it even after I wished you a lovely week.

Do have a lovely week once more.

missjo:

He may not be,however he does have insecurities.

You are a plain-faced, brown-nosing dullard, who offers little more than nuisance value!

Do have a pleasant evening


TV

...I learn fast and l like this game grin

1 Like

Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by Felixtuta(m): 7:58pm On Oct 11, 2016
Why not if not...
Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by repogirl(f): 8:01pm On Oct 11, 2016
TV01:

Because;
1. Physical abuse could be mild
2. it could be a one-off, situationally driven event
3. It could be dealt with effectively - healing and reconciliation should always be the first recourse
4. It's not given as grounds for divorce
5. There are no grounds for divorce in a consummated marriage

Further, even if you separate (you cannot remarry) unless your spouse dies - I am not counselling murder 0! - even if you call that separation "divorce". That's Christianity - I didn't write the rules grin


TV
Some pastors divorce for lesser reasons, are you saying they are going to hell? Even someone like Pastor Chris Oyakhilome whose wife divorced him for irreconcilable differences?
Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by Nobody: 8:03pm On Oct 11, 2016
OLAADEGBU:
Does an abused wife have to stay with her husband?

There is no ground for divorce in Christianity, that's why in some denomination, they stress on praying before u choose ur partner so that when fault comes you can go back to God and say, "see the husband/wife you have given me o, dp something about it"
Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by wakes: 8:05pm On Oct 11, 2016
Stay but not when your stay become dangerous. Wisdom is profitable to direct though. I wish you well.

1 Like

Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by busyfishing(m): 8:06pm On Oct 11, 2016
Yes it a very good reason.. Too many animals out there...Men&women inclusive
Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by Lexusgs430: 8:13pm On Oct 11, 2016
OLAADEGBU:
Does an abused wife have to stay with her husband?

NO. Physical Abuse, Financial Abuse, Verbal Abuse, in short all forms of abuse are not acceptable...........
Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by Seun(m): 8:13pm On Oct 11, 2016
What a deeply dumb question from a secular POV. If abuse isn't a good reason for divorce, then what the Bleep is a good reason for divorce?

10 Likes 5 Shares

Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by africanusvu(m): 8:15pm On Oct 11, 2016
To a christian.NO.unlest death do u part.To a muslim.No.unless d husband see the fourth wife and u a gone.to a pagan.YES
Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by BLACKPANTHER(m): 8:19pm On Oct 11, 2016
Don't be fast to judge. What does op mean by abuse? Also, what ignited the abuse? Again, we must understand we are human beings, desperate times call for desperate measures. A partner could lead the other to abuse him/her, to have an excuse to destroy the home. Look who told you that Husband and Wife no de do wrestling? Why should a Woman not be slapped, beaten or corrected. As u Marry am is she not as good as your younger Brothers and sisters you beat. Abeg for this Naija if your partner mess up collect am well if not u will die of Blood pressure
Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by uzolexis(f): 8:19pm On Oct 11, 2016
crackhaus:

My dear, trust me...I don't know how to deceive myself, which is why I'm not a regular church goer so I can't really qualify as an effective believer. grin

Which is why I stand by this:


[size=16pt]It isn't by force to have a Christian (church) marriage when you believe in divorce.[/size] cheesycheesy

I've said my own. grin

You are not answering the question. If you say you made a vow to be with the person till death, they also made a vow to love, cherish and respect you and anyone who abuses his partner is obviously breaking that vow as well, so what stops you from breaking your own vow, remember it takes 2 to make it work. Besides, if you are being abused seriously and you stick there and get killed eventually, i believe you have committed sucide cos you knowingly allowed yourself to be killed, God frowns at suicide you know.

1 Like

Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by shiftback: 8:21pm On Oct 11, 2016
Until she's beaten to death abi?
Any man that physically abuses a woman is a coward!

2 Likes

Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by shiftback: 8:24pm On Oct 11, 2016
BLACKPANTHER:
Don't be fast to judge. What does op mean by abuse? Also, what ignited the abuse? Again, we must understand we are human beings, desperate times call for desperate measures. A partner could lead the other to abuse him/her, to have an excuse to destroy the home. Look who told you that Husband and Wife no de do wrestling? Why should a Woman not be slapped, beaten or corrected. As u Marry am is she not as good as your younger Brothers and sisters you beat. Abeg for this Naija if your partner mess up collect am well if not u will die of Blood pressure

If i call you an idiot will the mods ban me?

1 Like

Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by Bollinger(m): 8:27pm On Oct 11, 2016
OLAADEGBU:
Does an abused wife have to stay with her husband?

In Nigeria yes. In normal countries, No.

3 Likes

Re: Is Abuse An Acceptable Reason For Divorce? by Bollinger(m): 8:31pm On Oct 11, 2016
TV01:

A Christian can by all means separate if they feels they are in real danger, but it is not grounds for divorce. Not to mention that "abuse" covers an almost interminable spectrum these days.


TV

Are you high? I bet you won't be saying this if you were a woman.

4 Likes

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