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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die (58439 Views)
Please Have Mercy On Your Children / Please Have Mercy On Me. / Need Advice! Married People Please Come In!! (2) (3) (4)
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Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by thorpido(m): 10:32am On Oct 12, 2016 |
Onegai:From what I saw,no breakfast yet. They don't know me,so she can't go anywhere with me.The people I met in her house said no and spoke to the mum on phone who also said no.She protested though. 1 Like |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by Onegai(f): 10:33am On Oct 12, 2016 |
thorpido: I actually thought sending her out would be a good idea but she would stvpidly jump into the arms of another bad guy or simply take up solicitation. She is like all those Black American girls called Shanaynae or Lakeisha. What about Gele tying, she can earn a decent income from it every Thursday to Saturday, all she needs is a chair, an umbrella and pins and she can pitch her tent at every open field there's a party going on in. So they don't want to feed her and her son? |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by Nobody: 10:34am On Oct 12, 2016 |
MizMyColi: You can never uplift a person if you allow their plight to put you down. You can't get sick enough to help people heal and you can't get poor enough to make poor people rich so make sure you stay positive, only then you have something to give. This is where 5minsmadness got me wrong. He thought that being selfish means forgetting others and not helping them but it only means that you have to take care of yourself FIRST and feel good so that you have something to share. If someone's situation upsets you and makes you feel down, take your attention from it 'cause you are not helping. Re-energize and come back when you feel strong and good again. 4 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by thorpido(m): 10:34am On Oct 12, 2016 |
Onegai:No,just the normal weakness,nausea and vomiting. |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by thorpido(m): 10:39am On Oct 12, 2016 |
Onegai:If she was African American she would qualify as a Lakeisha. She needs to do something but I don't know what she can do. 1 Like |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by MizMyColi(f): 10:42am On Oct 12, 2016 |
Sanchez01: I wish she will be more receptive to adopting the hustling spirit. |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by ifyalways(f): 10:42am On Oct 12, 2016 |
@Thorpido, there's definitely food in the house. Her mother is angry with her and she is too proud to apologize or maybe she is even doing inyanga for the mom ie revolting like a baby that she unfortunately is by refusing to eat. I think she needs to first apologize to her mother. Then we can also come in and help resolve whatever lingering issues she has with her mom. She must be made to understand that she must respect,obey, help and listen to her mother so long as she lives with her. Once that is settled then we can talk about getting her external help like counselling. If at all help in the form of setting her up for business should be rendered, I'm of the opinion that it should be AFTER delivery and she has shown considerable progress in her behavioral pattern and life decisions but methinks its best she works and earn money herself for setting up whatever business she wants. That is the first step in taking responsibility for ones life. I can send you the money to register her for ante natal. To you directly and strictly for her ante natals. 8 Likes |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by MizMyColi(f): 10:44am On Oct 12, 2016 |
Mindfulness: Thank you. Thank you Let me concentrate on the next needle prick then. I will be back 1 Like |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by Mynd44: 10:53am On Oct 12, 2016 |
ifyalways: It is weird you think getting money for ante natals is a problem because I can bet that if she sorts her issues out, her mum will bear it. The issue is that the nother is tired of her attitude. Her mum actually abandoned her in SA the first time because her wahala was almost killing her. She needs to change. If no one is allowingvher leave, maybe it is cos they know she gets up to no good. Has anyone asked if she is into drugs? With the 24 hour watch, I wont be surprised 5 Likes |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by thorpido(m): 10:54am On Oct 12, 2016 |
ifyalways:I agree with all you have written.It's the best for her situation. I want to see the mum tomorrow morning and hopefully when I get to talk to her,we all can know what the next step will be. One thing I picked from the conversation in her house is that the mum wants her to stay with the man that got her pregnant but she doesn't want the relationship any longer. |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by ifyalways(f): 11:08am On Oct 12, 2016 |
Mynd44:You are right. The mom actually hired a nanny for her , that's something my mom will NOT do for me sef considering shes not working nor married. What does she need a nanny for and what does she do with her 24 hours each day? Drugs ? Hmmmn |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by ifyalways(f): 11:10am On Oct 12, 2016 |
thorpido:What are her reasons? Please when you can, meet with the mom so we can know the real truth. 1 Like |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by Sanchez01: 11:12am On Oct 12, 2016 |
MizMyColi:This best sums up everything. If she is not willing to work, whatever assistance is rendered would be temporary, which worries me. 1 Like |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by Mynd44: 11:14am On Oct 12, 2016 |
ifyalways:Let me see, went to SA to school, dropped out, went into prostitution, lived with her love-vendor, got knocked up, mum abandoned her, possibly depressed, came home, fights her mum, she is on watch. Sorry, but I doubt there isn't drugs involved |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by thorpido(m): 11:19am On Oct 12, 2016 |
ifyalways:She says the man is abusive. |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by Nobody: 11:31am On Oct 12, 2016 |
Good morning and well done to everyone. Nairalanders are indeed caring. My thoughts on the matter is to deal with this layer by layer. Start from the bottom and work the way up. She has a roof and she has a mother so she is lucky. Her mother loves her and that’s why she is still under that roof A mothers love is unconditional, though can be strained sometimes a mother will always love her kid. Moji needs not to only apologise to her mother & build bridges & to behave herself while under her mother’s roof, but she also needs to understand that her mother is her only hope for now and to stop being an ingrate. She also has to understand that her choices are limited. She has done things the wrong way, so she needs to expect peculiar results. That’s just the plain truth. Funny enough I don’t remember the story, I must be getting old LOL But if what has been said is true then she needs to hear some hard truths. It looks pretty bad, and only she can make a go of her life and only if she wants to. The only thing that nairalanders can do at this point is to assist with reconciliation with her mother & to build that bridge between them and to educate/counsel moji on how she needs to change her life & to bounce back from all these bad choices. It seems hard but if he is really serious she can still make something of her life but it’s up to her. No one can do that for her. She needs to reach out before anyone can help her. If she is sitting under a tree making braids, then she is better placed to be helped than someone who feels too big to hustle. Please do not make her feel under pressure to abort or adopt. Only the mother of the baby has the right to decide if she wants an abortion and since she doesn’t want it, then that’s her right of choice. Moji and Moji alone will deal with the guilt and aftermath of an abortion or adoption, so it has to be her decision only to do this. I do pray that there is a happy ending for Moji, her mum and the innocent child/ren involved in all this. CC caracta 15 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by Nobody: 11:35am On Oct 12, 2016 |
Onegai why Ibadan? Behave yourself o! Dyt, You have really tried. I believe you lost some money and I have verified you. Don't mind those people who don't believe you. I will send you $450 instead of the $45 you requested. Send a N1,500 MTM recharge card to me, so I can call you with the western union code you need to pick up the money from Western Union. 9 Likes |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by nairaimporter: 11:41am On Oct 12, 2016 |
Onegai: She might be lying o. Maybe trying to disassociate herself from whatever account number she later posts |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by Laredojohn(m): 11:41am On Oct 12, 2016 |
@Thorpido good work bro, you have shed light to her issues as per her having a skill, will gather info on Lagos State skills acquisition centres close to her location where the cost is minimal, kindly quote me as you speak with her mum and the way forward as regards her antenatal and getting a skill... 6 Likes |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by Dyt(f): 11:44am On Oct 12, 2016 |
tearoses: Noooooooo $450 is too much I wasn't brought up that way I am OK with my $45 Just let me send you acc nimber Western union sef go take time and extra money Here's your Richard card I made it 4500 2453 5695 5634 419 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by TV01(m): 11:48am On Oct 12, 2016 |
I also recall OPs other post about her misadventure in SA. And, I don’t actually consider this to be a charitable case. She has a place to stay, and a wider family who she is with, and who posses some means. But that’s me, I’m in no way seeking to inform what other people decide to do, or not do in this case. The reason I’m here is because of the, without mincing words, nauseating way some of you think you can take dictate to this woman just because you may render some assistance. What gives you the right to control her fertility, mandate she gives her child up for adoption, or forcefully has an abortion. Who died and didn’t rise again and made any of you God? Can you even hear yourselves? She should marry a “mature man” and relocate to Ibadan? Is this farce? And then when she acts out the destructive behaviours and the marriage is strained or potentially fails, you’ll prescribe the “7 day, 4 step program to winning back your wife”? I mean a liability is one thing, but a loose canon, is something else entirely. Have you thought of lining up the “mature men” amongst your own kinfolk? I guess the US coercing African countries to adopt “progressive gay-rights policies" via aid and diplomatic pressure, is a good thing then? Who made you arbiters? If a man or group of men sat down to make decisions around womens reproduction based on criteria they considered suitable, you’d all be up in arms, yet here you are, crowing over a woman in a mess, even if it's self-inflicted? What objective criteria make you think you can mandate the measures you're forcefully presenting? Yet when we present no sex before marriage and intact biological homes, you rail against it and scream people are trying to impose their beliefs. And you have all but judged her to nothingness. Yes she has, speaking delicately, been wayward and done things beyond the pale for most people, but that accords you no rights over her, or makes your anger righteous. Neither does rendering assistance if you freely choose to do so. Be that financial or life mentoring. And Onegai, reading one or two of your post would actually suggest you may have an ulterior motive. TV 23 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by egbaguy2: 11:53am On Oct 12, 2016 |
Drama everywhere..... I m so following this. @dyt how re u |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by Onegai(f): 11:59am On Oct 12, 2016 |
TV01: Yes I do. I have a very strong ulterior motive. But I will sit my hands down and leave her to her fate, whilst you sit your butt somewhere and moralise and do nothing and be acting judgey. Please sit tight. 5 Likes |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by Dyt(f): 11:59am On Oct 12, 2016 |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by Nobody: 12:11pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
Mynd44: A nanny?! How many mothers in this current Nigeria have the luxury of a nanny? It's obvious she seeks easy money... I know her type. She may really need more money for the new baby but she won't change from expecting that people are obligated to meet her needs. Especially men... 1 Like |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by missjo(f): 12:16pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
Lots of interest here regarding this lady's matter,i can only hope that all this analysis going on here isn't just going to end at chatter, and that it all comes to fruition. |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by Funjosh(m): 12:17pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by An0nimus: 12:17pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
Dyt: plis snd me the Richard Card. let me subscribes for glo brwsin Okay, on a serious note, I'm happy the way the thread is unfolding. If folks had just started sending money probably no one would have known where she really needed help. This case pass money matter. Even if a million naira is sent it doesn't tackle the root problem. It's wa sha, some people are looking for money to buy WAEC/JAMB form and no hope, here someone had better opportunities but squandered them. The irony. OP, I wish you well. That's the only thing I can say to you. I do pray you experience that change good hearted NLers wish for you. All is well. |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by missjo(f): 12:18pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
Mindfulness: 2 Likes |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by Onegai(f): 12:21pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
tearoses: Not a joke o. We have dealt with this sort of situation like this several times. What we did for one was to keep him in Benin, where his expenses were low and encouraged him not to father a nation (since we are the ones paying their schoolfees). Ibadan is a change of scene, no-one knows her there. She can reinvent and become respectable. There is less room for the crazy psychological competition you will find in Lagos, no having to solve your mistakes in front of people who know you. Older people and people who don't build fences around themselves will be able to guide her without her constantly fighting them. She needs that stability. A change of pace and scene. Think of all those stories where a pregnant or wayward child got shipped off to Grandma and changed and started anew. And 10 years later, the turbulence is over. She needs a Father figure, so let her find one and marry him. Because she needs him devoted to her cause, not mentoring. One day, we won't be there. Adoption if she refuses all other help because you don't want another child growing up in this situation, in the U.S. it becomes a cycle from parent to child. Jaybee3, Thorpido and ifyalways, please ask her mum if they have family outside Lagos. 1 Like |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by Dyt(f): 12:23pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
Re: People Please Have Mercy On Me Before I Die by pickabeau1: 12:23pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
Well done bro Guidance and rehabilitation is what she needs not money Is it possible to give that child up for adoption after birth thorpido: |
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