In every case of divorce, there is rarely a situation where the two parties involved will be totally willing to part and there is usually a party that wants reconciliation and another that insists that it is over.

Before you marry a divorcee please make sure you find out the reason for the divorce and if it is possible,have a discussion with the ex to hear the other side of the story and no matter the false representation given by the ex, you will still have an idea of the type of person he or she is and the reason for the divorce because in most cases, the party who insists on divorce will always have a reason to divorce again and again.

Marriage is a union between two forgivers and if you cannot forgive a spouse who is sorry then what is the guaranty that your next marriage will work?

So ladies and guys, before you marry a divorcee, be sure to find out why that person is leaving his or her marriage because no matter how innocuous that person may look to you,you must understand that many people are like the leopard who never change its spots and most often,any party who insists on divorce especially due to irreconcilable differences will always have reason to divorce the new partner because even if you change partners a million times, there will always be irreconcilable differences.

I hope this makes sense.

#Flawed . Hasty Generalization Toks.
So if a lady/guy is being emotionally/physically abused and it gets to a point where he/she can't take it anymore hence a call for divorce, it means the individual will always have a reason to divorce again and again? I actually wish you posted this in the family section but oh well...

Lemme sit here

Mimzyy:
#Flawed . Hasty Generalization Toks.
So if a lady/guy is being emotionally/physically abused and it gets to a point where he/she can't take it anymore hence a call for divorce, it means the individual will always have a reason to divorce again and again? I actually wish you posted this in the family section but oh well...

Many people now use flimsy adjectives to buttress their premeditated act of divorce..emotional abuse,irreconcilable differences bla bla bla..

Talk about physical abuse and i will agree and i mean wife or husband battering...any other reason is a facade.

But then as i wrote, investigate and you wil know if the divorce is justified.

Let me crave the indulgence of lalasticlala...I believe this makes sense.

Toks2008:


Many people now use flimsy adjectives to buttress their premeditated act of divorce..emotional abuse,irreconcilable differences bla bla bla..

Talk about physical abuse and i will agree and i mean wife or husband battering...any other reason is a facade.

But then as i wrote, investigate and you wil know if the divorce is justified.

Ok, let's look at this scenario, a man that has been sex-starved by his wife for more than a year (for flimsy excuses) decides to ask for a divorce cos he doesn't wana cheat and he needs to remarry as they have no child(ren) yet.Will you imply that the man isn't justified enough?

Mimzyy:


Ok, let's look at this scenario, a man that has been sex-starved by his wife for more than a year (for flimsy excuses) decides to ask for a divorce cos he doesn't wana cheat and he needs to remarry as they have no child(ren) yet.Will you imply that the man isn't justified enough?

Sexual deprivation is a sin even in the bible but if i am a woman i will not just buy that excuse without asking some vital questions.

Infact i always love it when a new lady or man who wants to come into the life of a dirvocee to find a way of having a one on one conversation with teh ex of that person...sounds stupid but it makes sense as it will save one from avoidable heartbreak.

The bottom-line is that one should not just buy any pooh story but try to really find out what went down.

Nicely put and educating.

Well done OP. I love insightful threads.

Toks you are right this time

Mimzyy:


Ok, let's look at this scenario, a man that has been sex-starved by his wife for more than a year (for flimsy excuses) decides to ask for a divorce cos he doesn't wana cheat and he needs to remarry as they have no child(ren) yet.Will you imply that the man isn't justified enough?

the OP said you should investigate the reason for the divorce, don't just believe what the person told you hook, line and sinker. As Chimamanda Adichie once said, there's danger in a single story.

makes no sense. which ex will give u audience self. plenty single babes dey around why i go con dey look divorcee

Google63:

the OP said you should investigate the reason for the divorce, don't just believe what the person told you hook, line and sinker. As Chimamanda Adichie once said, there's danger in a single story.

I do not have a problem with the part you mentioned. What i have a prob with is where Toks stated that "...the party who insists on divorce will always have a reason to divorce again and again...".

The above quoted is all shades of wrong.

Nice write up

Can't marry a divorcee tho

That is not good

Today is my f*$%&#king birthday

Good One OP.

One of the reason's I knew that Adeboye is not of God.
His pastors divorce and remarries.

the bible is clear that if you marry a divorcee, you are committing a adultery.
Not committed but committing so it's a continuous process .

Matthew 5:32
But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication,
causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.

Matthew 19:9
And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication,
and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.

It's my bday

Toh. My mum and I still had this conversation yesterday.

God NEVER intended for any marriage to lead to divorce. The only ground Jesus gave in the book of Matthew was Infidelity. Yet, both parties can't marry after the divorce else, they become guilty of Adultery.

Yet, the bible asked that we forgive our neighbours 70 times 7 times a day (correct me if I'm wrong), so, how can one person commit adultery 70 times 7 times a day that we can't forgive, yet, we ask God daily for Mercy even tho we sin against Him countless times a day.

This is why it is very important to seek God's face before jumping into marriage, do things the way God has instructed, so when you're in a fix, you can go to Him and ask Him to fix it.

But now, we see biblical standards as "Old School".

he has come again

pussypounder:
Today is my f*$%&#king birthday

chief, today us minmine too

It's the marriage counselor again....following

......

Nicely written. But I'm just wondering which ex would give you a concrete answer, when they don't want to remember what happened between them.

Instead of trying to investigate all these, why not try to find out what both of you share in common - how compatible you are - things he/she can or can not tolerate no matter what.
This way you know where to draw lines - either to ride on or back off