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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently (34264 Views)
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Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by missyge(f): 7:15pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
Contact17:Sure |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by BekeeBuAgbara: 7:18pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
realityone:Is it scriptural to comment on Nairaland? |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by Jokerman(m): 7:18pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
AfroKnight: For this purpose shall a man leave father and mother and cling unto his wife, and dey twain shall become one... wat therefore God has joined together, let no man/MIL/woman/FIL etc... put assunder... Don't go against God's words. .... I will never allow my mum come live with me except on visitations. .. I built a house for her, let her stay with her husband (my Dad)... she has no business to meddle in my marriage life except I ask for her input. .. I love my mother buh my love for my wife must be greater.... 10 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by 2mNaira: 7:21pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
smh |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by floragregs(f): 7:23pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
AfroKnight:let ur wife's mother move in with you and see if u will like it. Or quietly ask ur own mother if she would have liked ur father's mum to live with them as a young couple. U just came in here to type like a big hypocrite. Go and ask ur mum about her own mother inlaw then come back and bash women. 9 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by kingphilip(m): 7:24pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
BekeeBuAgbara:help me ask am o Even the scripture he's trying to bank on says live peaceably with all men and the daughter in law isn't obeying that and he's here quoting scriptures 1 Like |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by 2mNaira: 7:25pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
Jokerman: Suppose u can't afford to build a house for.her and your father is dead and she is aged and needs care and attention.What will you do. I hope you know the same bible says children should take care of their aged mum. 2 Likes |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by Benbobola(m): 7:25pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
I really would not advice the MIL moving in. A couple should be made to grow their home by themselves. She moving in would obstruct that. The bible says a man shall leave his father and mother and cleave unto his wife, not that his mother will be moving with him to his home. When d mother was with her husband, did she allow her own MIL to join her home? When there would be misunderstandings in the home (definitely), the MIL would definitely interfere and be biased on her son. Everybody should learn to maintain their lane in life. She has run her own family by herself. She should allow his wife to run hers by not moving in with them. Am surprised some men are saying it is cool for her to move in. Seems u don't know anything about women at all. They keep the worst malice and they are your worst enemies. The moment one does sth wrong to the other in that house (definitely unavoidable), the other would seek out justice. Its in their blood. To avoid this terrible danger, allow her to visit as many times as possible or rent an apartment close for her. But never let your mother call your place HER HOME! Its for the good of the family o.... A word is enough for the wise! #mytwocents #ozokworloading 11 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by Nobody: 7:26pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
FreeWorld23: Build which house? How many Nigerian men build houses very early in life? Abeg shift well...most houses were built by the couple together, especially when they both earn. Typical Nigerian patriarchal society will say it's the 'man's house'. Don't try the emotional blackmail with me. I repeat, it extends to everyone. That's inclusive of my mum ... 8 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by Nobody: 7:26pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
Loisemm: If she is Ngozi Ezeonu no problem but if she's Patience Ozokwor, lol. Wahala dey o. 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by kingphilip(m): 7:29pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
Jokerman:and because the op hid under the guise of a friend to say she wants to stay permanently that's why you are saying all these?? Are you sure the so called husband built a house for his mother?? You just jumped into conclusion here I must say 1 Like |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by Benbobola(m): 7:30pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
mnairaland:In that case, run the option through your wife first. If she says yes, fine. If she says no, find another way. Its her home and she is the mother and caretaker of the home so her opinion counts. Am sure she will help you think of another option. 2 Likes |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by kingphilip(m): 7:32pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
mnairaland:don't mind that guy who just jumped into conclusion just to comment on half baked stories of the op |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by 2mNaira: 7:34pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
BekeeBuAgbara: O you haven't read where the bible verse that says you should take care of you aged parents. Bible says to leave your father and mother and cleave to your wife.Meaning cease to be under their tutlelage. If however they become aged it is your respinsibility to take care of them. If you can do that without they living with you then fine. 1 Like |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by floragregs(f): 7:36pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
Jokerman:thank you! You are a man! Don't mind that mummy's boy |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by Nobody: 7:47pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
I created this thread for you,https://www.nairaland.com/3415656/issue-mother-inlaws-staying-sons-daughters Loisemm: |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by comtem2011: 7:54pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
Ujoan:Easier said than done, so she cannot reap the fruit of her labour without staying with them. Does that mean u can do same thing in the future? She should stay in her house biko, what is she looking for? As a woman self, I can't allow my mother to move in with me permanently so why will my mother in law do so, I can't turn to a pretender overnight all in the name of satisfying her. I cant even allow my mother to move in permanently into my brother's matrimonial home. The couple should be allowed to have their privacy abeg. 5 Likes |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by dayowunmi(m): 7:54pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
It is WRONG. The Bible, talking about marriage says "and for this reason shall a man leave his father and mother and shall cleave unto his wife and the two shall become one flesh". The man has left home to cleave to his wife, why should the woman go and cleave to the son? It is not proper in any way. 3 Likes |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by Mayflowa(m): 7:55pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
kingphilip: To be harshly frank with you. My mother is an angel to many people but there are some people my mum don't just like. No matter how will talk her out of it. The look on her face when such people come near or do anything, u go believe. lol. So my wife would be dead duck if she would be one of such few persons. Anyway such coincidence won't even happen! For sure, some people are really skilled in studying people and getting warm to them. You are lucky to be. That can't be spoken of the generality of people especially wives who think their position is threaten and facing imminent usurp. Like you, I too can live with anyone peacefully. But I understand the difference in people and can't hold them accountable to it. 2 Likes |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by intrepid: 7:56pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
I don't think it's the best thing to do. There may still be issues in the future unless the woman is one of a kind. |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by bilulu(m): 8:00pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
PaperLace:1. Don't forget one day u will become a mother in law too n u would want to move into ur son's house...... Expect same treatment 2. If she didn't took care of him he wouldn't be become d responsible gentleman u met n admired. 3. If she didn't pay ur bride price mind u, u won't call dat house ur home....... I logged on Jux to respond to ur comment 1 Like |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by iamharkinwaley: 8:01pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
hmmmm just dey observe |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by 2mNaira: 8:03pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
Benbobola: Which other way is there if you.can't afford to house her.[center][/center] Most women who are good wives are bad daughter-in-laws. So, without having to spell it out, all bad wives are usually bad DIL. Any woman who cannot accomodate her MIL,even if she is a witch, is a bad DIL. To be honest, a lot of MIL are unreasonable, but the root of DIL/MIL problem is the fact that many DIL have their minds already prigrammed wrongly about MIL. The truth is this, even if a woman's MIL is a witch the womsn can still disarm her and end up making her her best friend and ally. The real primary reason why MIL's have issues with their DIL's is because they have fears and the primary reason DIL's have issues with their MIL is because they have fears. There are certain basic things that can be done to to disarm a bad MIL. 1.Identify her fears. 2. Allay her fears. 3.Recipricate love for hatred, kindness for unkindness. 4. Take her as your mother. 5.Treat her as you wouod treat your mother(that is if you treat your mother well otherwise, treat her right right. 6.Confront you fears. 7.Get rid of you fears. 8.Re-program your mind to be pisitively dispossed towards her. 9.Pray 10.Watch her change. cc: Loisemm, sisisioge 3 Likes |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by figure007(m): 8:06pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
Ujoan:let me tell you something ..it's a good thing to have ur mother in law or whatever with you provided she is not coming to cause havoc BUT literally it doesn't make sense at times to decide to go and stay with ur son or daughter who is married for crying out loud they have their own life to live ... they should be left alone to their private life... do you know immediately some mother in law enters a home the home suffers setback cos of lack of privacy and confidence ...the daughter in law will start living under pressure just to satisfy both man and mother inlaw 4 Likes |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by MRBODMAS(m): 8:06pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
It is a law of gravity, what goes must come down. Young shall grow and become old. This life is cyclical. When u hate ur mother in law based on the mentality that "Me and My Husband". All well and good, you are still coming to that position. Since she is not a troublesome woman, why can't u accommodate her? But if she is trouble maker, then u can do other wise. I thank God that I av best mom in the world, she is easy going. I av made my wife to av a very strong cordial relationship with her so that d love will continue flowing. Please to scatter ur home because what people are saying abt the mother in law, yours can be differ, create ur personal world. 1 Like |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by HBIAFRA1: 8:09pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
If you reject your mother inlaw, one day ur son will get married and his wife will reject u also,, then u will be old mother inlaw too, if ur hands and heart is clean then commit ur case to God, mama inlaw will come and no evil will happen ! 1 Like |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by Jokerman(m): 8:11pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
mnairaland: That's if she's aged... at this stage, my wife will understand and we will both give her a room and make sure we attend to her needs. ..... Although I will never allow her suffer.... |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by Cutehector(m): 8:12pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
Lol personally my mum knws I won't tolerate her staying for weeks in my house.. |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by donshady(m): 8:20pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
I made up my mind my mother will not live with me but her husband's house. that's where she belongs. I have my family now. she had hers. gonna leave alone with my wife and children. She can come visiting if she wants but not to come live with me. for no reason. 2 Likes |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by DEBJOCH1(m): 8:20pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
End time mother inlaws every where, you will discover that 90% of those in support of the mother inlaw parking into the sobs house with wife are yorubads. It is morally wrong for a healthy mother unlawful to park and move her things and start living with her don and wife. The mother for kukuma marry her son. During my wedding the officiating minister drew the ear of my parent and my wife patent clearly stay at distance from us, that's if our parents want the marriage to last. Trust my mother when ever she go to any of her son's or daughters house for Omugwo, after her usual 2 months she will complaining that she want to go back to my late fathers house, she will tell us that grass had coveted her farm she need to go and tend to it. As for your friend concerned, if her mother unlawful insist on parking in, she should also invite her own mother in too si that the equation will balance. 2 Likes |
Re: Her Mother Inlaw Wants To Move In Permanently by byvan03: 8:24pm On Oct 18, 2016 |
OP what is your friend scared of? Let her do what is right, MIL is the one that needs to watch her bp if she stirs trouble, so why worry over nothing? You might end up enjoying her stay. |
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