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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. (3886 Views)
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Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by Talk2Bella(f): 12:19pm On Oct 17, 2016 |
Stalking is an art and should not be ashamed of, if you’re good at stalking consider yourself one of the greatest spies to ever live, but stalking your boyfriend is a whole new level of stalkism and demands professionalism that only I can give you. You have to know FBI CIA and even the Nigeria Police Force are looking for people like these to hire and here I am, wanting to teach you for free, you must take these guidelines very serious. 1. Automatic Dodge Syndrome {ADS} how fast can you dodge when trailing someone? How fast does your neck move, legs run, about turn movement, these are important steps to be the perfect stalker. 2. How many wigs do you have? This is pure camouflage mode, you need different appearances to carry out this operation, different wigs for different stalking days 3. How many sunshades do you have? Same as the wig, you don’t want to give away your identity. 4. Do you have an helmet? You cant stalk someone in a car/cab because of traffic here in Nigeria, you need a standby okada man, kekenapep to move you around and this might cause your identity to be revealed hence the helmet, wear it all through the time you’re in any of these mode of transportation, you can even wear your sunshades in it, use a bandana to cover your mouth, that’s pure stalk mode activated. 5. How flexible are you? Can you jump from a moving bus/train/aeroplane/bicycle/okada in case he makes an unexpected stop? 6. How many running shoes do you have? Unless you’re queen nwokoye you cannot stalk someone on heels, please have at least 4 pairs so you don’t look the same. 7. Do you have a camera/camera phone? This is an important tool in the stalking game, for evidence. 8. Avoid cctv cameras and overhead bridges, okada and kekenapep cannot pass there. 9. You know a broke chick cannot stalk [/b]anyone abi, you must be financially capable to be able to stalk your boyfriend. 10.[b] How s your lie game? Can you think on your feet when you get caught? What coincidental excuses can you give? You need to be smart to graduate into a stalker. 11. You must have all his friends numbers, so when he says he’s going to see any of them, call them, pretend to be someone else and casually ask, “My guy how far, where you de na” 12. You must have plenty sim cards. You need to know there’s no shame in stalking your boyfriend, he is your investment and like all investments we expect good returns, when you feel he’s acting someone, exert these measures, men are smart, men are very smart but women have been proven to be smarter. You can’t catch men these days on social medias or checking their phones, you have to follow them about for real proof, follow them to work, outings, toilets, bathroom, but on a stealth mode so you’re not caught. This is going to work a 100% do these things and thank me later. Isabella Ibeji Here's a video to guide you through https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dSbVUyv49vY 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by Nobody: 12:22pm On Oct 17, 2016 |
[size=20pt] rubbish [/size] be like say i dey read madman diary 1 Like |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by mhiztee15(f): 12:23pm On Oct 17, 2016 |
All these processes just to stalk your bf I will rather convert all the energy towards been a better woman smh bf wey go cheat go cheat jare 5 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by Nobody: 12:30pm On Oct 17, 2016 |
The funny thing is that.. He'll always cover his tracks.. |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by Talk2Bella(f): 12:37pm On Oct 17, 2016 |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by Talk2Bella(f): 12:38pm On Oct 17, 2016 |
mhiztee15: its just for humor sake |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by Talk2Bella(f): 12:39pm On Oct 17, 2016 |
judeefcc: see his mouth |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by Nobody: 12:43pm On Oct 17, 2016 |
Talk2Bella:We will keep cheating.. There's really nothing you people can do about it.. |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by Nobody: 12:44pm On Oct 17, 2016 |
Talk2Bella:finer than your own watched your video |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by Talk2Bella(f): 12:54pm On Oct 17, 2016 |
judeefcc: Hahahahahaha let nairalanderz be the judge |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by Talk2Bella(f): 12:56pm On Oct 17, 2016 |
OBTSubtle: And we will be devicing new means to catch you people |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by Nobody: 12:58pm On Oct 17, 2016 |
Talk2Bella:we'll say sorry and it'll be over because biological clock is a member of the gang |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by Talk2Bella(f): 1:15pm On Oct 17, 2016 |
OBTSubtle: If only we were in the 60's |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by Nobody: 1:17pm On Oct 17, 2016 |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by Talk2Bella(f): 11:44am On Oct 18, 2016 |
Mynd44 |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by groomed: 12:03pm On Oct 27, 2016 |
mhiztee15:are you based in Ogun state, Sango otta area? |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by grad2012(f): 12:20pm On Oct 27, 2016 |
Why go through all this stress. |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by Nobody: 12:24pm On Oct 27, 2016 |
Stalk? Who get time? |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by Nobody: 12:31pm On Oct 27, 2016 |
mhiztee15: Some ladies just have time for silly things. |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by Nobody: 12:33pm On Oct 27, 2016 |
Talk2Bella:Better!. Plz add that o!. |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by Talk2Bella(f): 1:40pm On Oct 27, 2016 |
Benita27: |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by mhiztee15(f): 5:15am On Oct 28, 2016 |
why are you asking hope no problem? groomed: |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by Nobody: 12:44pm On Oct 28, 2016 |
im glad its for humour sake but let me add that if you stalk your boyfriend then you will soon die because i know some people will still try it..... |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by Greenbullet(m): 3:22pm On Oct 28, 2016 |
nobody can stalk me ,I know when am being followed.if I notice u,I go enter market lose u sharp sharp. |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by Talk2Bella(f): 3:27pm On Oct 28, 2016 |
Greenbullet: na so |
Re: Guide 101 On How To Stalk Your Boyfriend. by Talk2Bella(f): 3:28pm On Oct 28, 2016 |
baddestchic: |
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