Olanna45:
Oga you are wrong oh. I have seen cases where the lady cursed both the father in law, husband's siblings and even there ancestors. Infront of the whole kindred

This whole thing boils down to personal character. it has nothing to do with tribe.

God bless you for this!
A woman's character has nothing to do with her tribe..there are good and bad people everywhere.. it sometimes has to do with his/her upbringing and personal morals and values.. not tribe at all..

Olanna45:
Oga you are wrong oh. I have seen cases where the lady cursed both the father in law, husband's siblings and even there ancestors. Infront of the whole kindred

This whole thing boils down to personal character. it has nothing to do with tribe.

Abeg joor that's how most of their women behave I know Some1 who went through this.

They always dnt want hear u speak ur language.
Coz they assume u speaking about them.

NIGHTMAREOO7:


Abeg joor that's how most of their women behave I know Some1 who went through this.

They always dnt want hear u speak ur language.
Coz they assume u speaking about them.

Obviously you are mixing with the wrong ones.

My cousin married a lady from Ekiti.Nobody was in support of the marriage at first, but he insisted and we have no choice but to leave him to his decision.
This lady is among the best SIL one can ever have. Cool headed, homely and very respectful. Till the day she died nobody spoke ill of her. She is a full Ekiti born and bred.

But the one from my town, ahhh!!! she is trouble personified. she practically chased everybody away from her home. We don't visit her and she doesn't visit any of us. Anybody from her husband's family is a treated like a leper.

Will you still attribute such to tribe? Its a personality thing. No tribe has a monopoly of bad wives.

Olanna45:
Obviously you are mixing with the wrong ones.

My cousin married a lady from Ekiti.Nobody was in support of the marriage at first, but he insisted and we have no choice but to leave him to his decision.
This lady is among the best SIL one can ever have. Cool headed, homely and very respectful. Till the day she died nobody spoke ill of her. She is a full Ekiti born and bred.

But the one from my town, ahhh!!! she is trouble personified. she practically chased everybody away from her home. We don't visit her and she doesn't visit any of us. Anybody from her husband's family is a treated like a leper.

Will you still attribute such to tribe? Its a personality thing. No tribe has a monopoly of bad wives.

Hmmm that's quite rare.
Its a tribe thing I know what I'm telling
Their gals don't just blend with Igbo men in terms of marriage.
But they can actually mingle and have no problem in that Trust me.

How can a lady warn his husband not to speak his language in her presence that's very extreem. If it w.. Yoruba of all people dat like like blowing their language anywhere they are now don't want his man to speak his language.
And mind u this is not the first time I'm hearing this.
Even when a kid is eventually born they would want their kid to bear their own native name and grow with it ratter Dan they husby native name.

I know what I'm telling u.

she was not brought up properly
nd it all lies in her mother's hand
she jos lacks manners

NIGHTMAREOO7:


Hmmm that's quite rare.
Its a tribe thing I know what I'm telling
Their gals don't just blend with Igbo men in terms of marriage.
But they can actually mingle and have no problem in that Trust me.

How can a lady warn his husband not to speak his language in her presence that's very extreem. If it w.. Yoruba of all people dat like like blowing their language anywhere they are now don't want his man to speak his language.
And mind u this is not the first time I'm hearing this.
Even when a kid is eventually born they would want their kid to bear their own native name and grow with it ratter Dan they husby native name.

I know what I'm telling u.

You are always on every intertribal marriage thread spilling lies..To you igbo people are perfect with no spot.

Acidosis:
This kind of problem will always come when people follow intertribal marriage advice on Nairaland from people who are happily married to partners of same tribe.


Truth is that YOU can never escape this issue for as long as you remain married with a woman of different tribe. Situations will arise and she'd 'yab' your language, your food, village, culture, even parents. If you must remain married, tolerance and endurance are inevitable. You just cannot escape this issue. It is one of those things faceless entities will never tell you on Nairaland until you're IN. They will so push you and make you assume that an Ibibio man can live with a Yoruba woman for 100 years without cultural and attitudinal clashes.



Keep enduring bro, and prepare for the worst. Soon, she might tell you that your village or family house STINKS.

Mr and Mrs oyema have been married for over 34yrs now(Ijebu woman and Anambra man

kaziblake:
Mr and Mrs oyema have been married for over 34yrs now(Ijebu woman and Anambra man

Yes, OP and his wife can also continue in this manner for 100 years.

Meringe:
Any woman that will stop me from going home every Xmas to reconnect with my people, holy ghost fire!!!!.

What is the essence of my living if I can't go home and feel free with my family and speak my dialect as a full bloodied Igbo man.

Any woman that loves you, will blend with your culture and she will love whatever you love dearly.

You are absolutely right there.
My boo is from the east. Works and resides in the east.
Because I love him and want to be part of his life. Am making plans to move and reisde in the east as well. Cause I feel where the husband is that's where the wife should be. As long as the place is not a war torn zone area, then am. Good to go. And ready to accept and learn his values and family values.
In fact as so eager to even move and extend my business there.




So op the question is didn't u know whom you were marrying before u married her?
Where u blind folded? Cause honestly. Am. Not understanding

kaziblake:
You are always on every intertribal marriage thread spilling lies..To you igbo people are perfect with no spot.

They ain't perfect but better
And mind u I'm not telling lies here.
Why would i

Amelian:




You are absolutely right there.
My boo is from the east. Works and resides in the east.
Because I love him and want to be part of his life. Am making plans to move and reisde in the east as well. Cause I feel where the husband is that's where the wife should be. As long as the place is not a war torn zone area, then am. Good to go. And ready to accept and learn his values and family values.
In fact as so eager to even move and extend my business there.




So op the question is didn't u know whom you were marrying before u married her?
Where u blind folded? Cause honestly. Am. Not understanding

It boo from east ?
Hahahahah lady now who is foolin who?

NIGHTMAREOO7:


It boo from east ?
Hahahahah lady now who is foolin who?

Fooling who?

How ?? I don't get??

He comes from the eastern region. And so?

Amelian:




Fooling who?

How ?? I don't get??

He comes from the eastern region. And so?

Hmm Amelian I'm so surprised at u on this comment to the extent that that I had to check twice to make sure it u..
Now the question is why would a pretty gal like u be telling lies .

kaboninc:


Yes oh.. .

Make we wait till you're IN

Till then then,
This also includes Acidosis

NIGHTMAREOO7:


Hmm Amelian I'm so surprised at u on this comment to the extent that that I had to check twice to make sure it u..
Now the question is why would a pretty gal like u be telling lies .

I still don't understand what u are saying

Please be more specific which lie?

Where u the one who gave me my man?

Cause I still. Don't understand what u are driving at?

Please stop going round in circles. Be plain and say what's on your mind. Biko

Make una see me o.. Lol




They don come again.. Monitoring spirits that are so certain they know my life history and my love life join


Abeg talk wetin u feel u know ooo

Let's clear the air.. Spill it out.
We are all ears ooo

Am waiting

1Alex4u:
I am Igbo and married to a yoruba lady 3yrs now with no child. We moved to California USA about 2 yrs ago.

My wife can be lovely sometimes and a dare devil at other times!

My first issue with my wife is her mouth. It is as saucy and abusive as a completely illetrate woman under a abusive spell. She can 'curse' anytime...anywhere...and she can say anything even when we in public. I have cautioned, begged and even fought severally with her to express my dislike for abuses but she wouldn't just stop. We returned home
for xmas and we had a slight argument, next thing she gave me a very chilli curse in the presence of my siblings. Everyone kept mute and watched her in complete disbelief and suprise!!. I felt extremely embarassed. My elder bro had to callme aside and ask...is this first time she is doing this or is this what u have been covering up and enduring?
Pleas advice me ....what is the best way to curb this abusive habit frm my wife...is this generally a Yoruba habit or is it just with her??



Now the other issue i have with my wife is suspected unwilligness to accept and integrate into the igbo culture.

It started about few months after our wedding. We had a slight argument and then my younger sister called and greeted me in igbo. After i dropped the call, my wife pounced at me and told me never ever to speak igbo in the house if i wanted peace to rein. I couldn't believe my ears. You see, sometimes i dont blame men that raise their hands on a woman coz these are the kind of situations that can result to one. I had never been this provoked all my life like i was when she made that statement. I still wonder how she didny receive atleast 2 hot slaps that moment. We had a very big argument that day and kept malice for weeks. I kept late night and even smoked/drunk for the first time in my life.

Also, while in the usa... i noticed wheenever i mentioned travelling to my village to see extended relations, she will flair up and find one way or another to prevent us frm going. I had issues booking the flight tickets and she kept saying its God trying to
prevent us from going. When i finally succeeded in booking the flight, she called her mum to inform her that i was booking a trip to the village against her wish and i should be held responsible for whatever happens to her. She even at one point said any ritual fashioned against her will not prosper. See me see whalala
oo....!!
Although her dad had big issues with his relations and he moved to the city where he bought a house and stayed as his new abode and raised all his kids to acknowledge this new abode in the city as their home. So they were never close to any of her paternal relations. Infact none of her paternal relations came for our wedding to my greatest suprise.
On my end, i have a very extended relation from both parents and as i kid i always looked forward to travelling to the village to receonnect with relations and i still
maintain such reconnect till today.

Please i knw she reads this blog well. I need yoruba ladies who married igbo or any igbo lady to help enlighten her on igbo traditions and expectations as a wife of an igbo man. I regret not doing this before i got married atleast.

Apologies if too long...i just had ti pour out my hrt!!

My apologies for quoting ur whole post but I had to get ur attention somehow.
The generalization is unfair and not right. It doesn't cut across all yorubas, believe me I know. My dad an igbo man married a yoruba woman, they had their ups and downs but were married for a very long time.
Yes yorubas do have very bad mouth that one I know and grew to dislike from my mom and her relations but living with them the length of time I did I could never see anything abusive in their talking.
pls note that the igbos too have very bad mouth, that one I also got to be exposed to from my cousins but only in jest and play. All in all, I have a great respect for my relations of both divide and I call both region home.

The situation u painted is obviously true for only ur wife, as in her character which u should have seen while dating her? Thats the essence of dating before marrying. Since its like this, ur only option now is to sit her down and speak intensively with her. If she refuses to change then sending her back to her parents after reporting her to them is another option. In the Nigerian setting that action alone should correct her medulla. If it fails to correct her then u still have the option of going the whole 9 yards of seperation and all in that direction but before u do ask urself if u can stomach marrying an abusive woman ur whole life or if u would rather call it quits.

I don't know why people fell for this obviously forged, dim witted and tribalistic post. Yoruba women really intimidate you OP. You will soon be put to shame and all your motives exposed. Silly tart

Amelian:





I still don't understand what u are saying

Please be more specific which lie?

Where u the one who gave me my man?

Cause I still. Don't understand what u are driving at?

Please stop going round in circles. Be plain and say what's on your mind. Biko

Make una see me o.. Lol




They don come again.. Monitoring spirits that are so certain they know my life history and my love life join


Abeg talk wetin u feel u know ooo

Let's clear the air

Hahahha ..
But yea its not funny
I can remember vividly ur hateful comments here about Igbo pole few months ago.

U personally said u can never have anything to do with Igbo men again.
Talking about how u dated 3 igbo men and they said they can't marry u coz of tribe.
But I was shocked coz I know many Igbomen who married from south south bcoz south south is d another place Igbo men like marryn from aside their tribe.

U swore not to have anything to do with Igbo men Again and u called it mistake.
U even went as far as saying u will tell ur daughter not to marry Dem except mingling with them.. .

Yes I know u are suprised now how I still remeberd dat.... but my memory is dat retentive.. I hardly forget people I met in d past.

Why would u tell such lies amelian why.

mysticgal:
Till then then, This also includes Acidosis

Sure, hope we can prove them wrong

NIGHTMAREOO7:


Hahahha ..
But yea its not funny
I can remember vividly ur hateful comments here about Igbo pole few months ago.

U personally said u can never have anything to do with Igbo men again.
Talking about how u dated 3 igbo men and they said they can't marry u coz of tribe.
But I was shocked coz I know many Igbomen who married from south south bcoz south south is d another place Igbo men like marryn from aside their tribe.

U swore not to have anything to do with Igbo men Again and u called it mistake.
U even went as far as saying u will tell ur daughter not to marry Dem except mingling with them.. .

Yes I know u are suprised now how I still remeberd dat.... but my memory is dat retentive.. I hardly forget people I met in d past.

Why would u tell such lies amelian why.

Yes I remember I said so..in one of my posts I won't deny it.

But at the end of the day, even though I had some painful pasts in relationship with guys from the east.

Strangely enough my heart fell in love with another guy from the eastern part of the country . Even though initially I fought against my feelings for this young man
The heart still says nope, amelian this is what I want and u can't deny me of him.
So far he's a good man, he's different, in his actions and we've talked about the future on several occasions unlike the ones I dated in my past.

Like my mentor once said, amelian don't allow the past to over shadow the future. Let the past remain in the past. And let God unravel the future for u. Some people are unhappy today cos they still live in the past and use it against any good meaning well wishers that try to come. Close.

If am to dwell on my past Nightmare007. I will go on bomb massacre and bomb every man on earth including you! that will be my mission unless death stops me. So no need going down that lane. Am happy with whom am with . The present and the future is all that matters 2 us. Nothing else matters
Take it or leave it. Its my life and my choice
I choose to be productive than to be destructive . So help Me God amen.

Amelian:





Yes I remember I said so..in one of my posts I won't deny it.

But at the end of the day, even though I had some painful pasts in relationship with guys from the east.

Strangely enough my heart fell in love with another guy from the eastern part of the country . Even though initially I fought against my feelings for this young man
The heart still says nope, amelian this is what I want and u can't deny me of him.
So far he's a good man, he's different, in his actions and we've talked about the future on several occasions unlike the ones I dated in my past.

Like my mentor once said, amelian don't allow the past to over shadow the future. Let the past remain in the past. And let God unravel the future for u. Some people are unhappy today cos they still live in the past and use it against any good meaning well wishers that try to come. Close.

If am to dwell on my past Nightmare007. I will go on bomb massacre and bomb every man on earth including you! that will be my mission unless death stops me. So no need going down that lane. Am happy with whom am with . The present and the future is that matters 2 us. Nothing else matters
Take it or leave it. Its my life and my choice

Hmm but that was just few months ago.
U generalized and condemned every Igbo man
Should I now say u live a fake life?.
Dat comment shows U have so much hate for Igbo men yet wen ahed to fall for one yet again maybe coz of lust.

Now another small mistake from him u would continue with ur generalisation.
I can't forget how u spoke with so much hate.
Dat day

U pple can hate igbos how u like...As far as concerned Igbo tribe is d best place any man or woman can marry from fcoz we care abt family with very very important.
We value marriage and we know how to take Carr of our parners.
U can call me BIASED for this statement. But
I ain't saying this cox I'm igbo.. But I'm saying this coz I hav stayed in in different tribes in this country and come to realize that igbo tribe is different afteral.

Acidosis:

Sure, hope we can prove them wrong

We ke
I am not understanding

*how do one express in words the sound he makes when he clears his throat*

Someborri please help me here.

mysticgal:

We ke
I am not understanding

Don't you want to be a proud second wife?

mysticgal:
We ke I am not understanding

Denying your boo now? Is this how you used to do

kaboninc:


Don't you want to be a proud second wife?

Over my dead body

Acidosis:

Denying your boo now? Is this how you used to do

Yes, do the do

NIGHTMAREOO7:


Hmm but that was just few months ago.
U generalized and condemned every Igbo man
Should I now say u live a fake life?.
Dat comment shows U have so much hate for Igbo men yet wen ahed to fall for one yet again maybe coz of lust.

Now another small mistake from him u would continue with ur generalisation.
I can't forget how u spoke with so much hate.
Dat day

U pple can hate igbos how u like...As far as concerned Igbo tribe is d best place any man or woman can marry from fcoz we care abt family with very very important.
We value marriage and we know how to take Carr of our parners.
U can call me BIASED for this statement. But
I ain't saying this cox I'm igbo.. But I'm saying this coz I hav stayed in in different tribes in this country and come to realize that igbo tribe is different afteral.

Well you can think whatever you like of me.
You can presume whatever u want of me
I careless. Cause your assumptions of me does not make any difference in my life ,in my bank account and in my relationships . And where am heading to in, the future and even right now ? Your conclusions ? are simply least important in my life.
What matters most to me are 6 things: My God, My job, My family, My Man, my Friends and my Fans.. Every other including You! is oblivious to me.
So be free my friend, to think whatever u like. It's a free world.

mysticgal:
Yes, do the do

Okay I will do the do, but hope somebody can play with you?

Amelian:





Well you can think whatever you like of me.
You can presume whatever u want of me
I careless. Cause of your assumptions of me does not make any difference in my life and in my relationships. And where am heading to in, the future.
Your conclusions are least important in my life.
What matters most to me are 6 things: My God, My job, My family, My Man, my Friends and my Fans.. Every other including You! is oblivious to me.
So be free my friend, to think whatever u like. It's a free world.

I'm not thinkin of "whatever I like'' as is u said.
I'm talking based on wat Said from ur very own mouth or should I say ur comment.

With the kind if comments u made that day
Its still shocking to me to realize u are following yet another igbo man dat u hate so much.

I still can't bliv it I swaer.

NIGHTMAREOO7:


I'm not thinkin of "whatever I like'' as is u said.
I'm talking based on wat Said from ur very own mouth or should I say ur comment.

With the kind if comments u made that day
Its still shocking to me to realize u are following yet another igbo man dat u hate so much.

I still can't bliv it I swaer.

You better believe it bro...change is the only constant thing in life!

NIGHTMAREOO7:


I'm not thinkin of "whatever I like'' as is u said.
I'm talking based on wat Said from ur very own mouth or should I say ur comment.

With the kind if comments u made that day
Its still shocking to me to realize u are following yet another igbo man dat u hate so much.

I still can't bliv it

Well believe it.. if you can?

One thing that is always constant in life is Change.


And being hateful of a certain tribes won't help me in any way.

Yes back then I said those things, I felt hatred towards igbos. I Wont deny it.
I didn't even want my unborn children, when given birth to, 2 have anything to do with igbos. I agree I mentioned. I won't deny it.
But today, few months down the line. I decide not to feel hatred anymore towards igbo guys. It's not a crime to stop feeling hateful.. Its something I decide to let go of and Be a better person.
Have decided to be a better person and let bygones be bygones. Its my choice between me and God.

And if u still find it hard to believe?
Hey! It's not my fault u feel the way you do. Keep hanging onto it.
But the lady u are seeing here is very happy.


Hi, Honey I know u are reading this *waves fingers *

He's a member nairaland..

Love you lots dear