kaboninc:


You better believe it bro...change is the only constant thing in life!

Amelian:






Well believe it.. if you can?

One thing that is always constant in life is Change.


And being hateful of a certain tribes won't help me in any way.

Yes back then I said those things, I felt hatred towards igbos. I Wont deny it.
I didn't even want my unborn children, when given birth to, 2 have anything to do with igbos. I agree I mentioned. I won't deny it.
But today, few months down the line. I decide not to feel hatred anymore towards igbo guys. It's not a crime to stop feeling hateful.. Its something I decide to let go of and Be a better person.
Have decided to be a better person and let bygones be bygones. Its my choice between me and God.

And if u still find it hard to believe?
Hey! It's not my fault u feel the way you do. Keep hanging onto it.
But the lady u are seeing here is very happy.


Hi, Honey I know u are reading this *waves fingers *

He's a member nairaland..

Love you lots dear

NIGHTMAREOO7:


Hmm obviously u are enjoying the cuccumber.
I hope its not lust though
Coz 3 months is just too short for one to change soon deep like that.
Its either u are datin igbo guy already before I made d comment or smthin

Anyways enjoy the cucumber.
Igbo man still remain s d best option for u

Amelian:





Cucumber, lettuce, or shawarma

Wharever

You don try for today?

Or u need award join?

NIGHTMAREOO7:


No award just enjoy ur cucumber and play ur card well and make it yr permanent cuccumber...
and next time don't pretend u hate what yu love so much.

kaboninc:

Acidosis:


Yes, OP and his wife can also continue in this manner for 100 years.

NIGHTMAREOO7:


No award just enjoy ur cucumber and play ur card well and make it yr permanent cuccumber...
and next time don't pretend u hate what yu love so much.

Amelian:




You said what again?

kaziblake:
meaning?
Do I look like ur mate?

Olanna45:
Oga you are wrong oh. I have seen cases where the lady cursed both the father in law, husband's siblings and even there ancestors. Infront of the whole kindred

This whole thing boils down to personal character. it has nothing to do with tribe.

1Alex4u:
Thanks all for the comements...advices and all. Clearly i failed to take actions against the behaviours i had observed while we courted....or simply put...i thought it was something i could change while in the marriage...but i v realised i cant....and that's y i came here for help.

Advice to folks...never assume any behavior of ur partner during marriage. If u cannot change it before marriage...then better opt out.

2ndly, its usually not so generally advisable togo for intertribal....sincerely. It just gets complicated and makes the marriage not so enjoyable at all when differences start to arrive. Compliments to all those who are currently in a good or working intertribal marriages though...but its best to avoid them if one can....saves alot of headaches.

I didnt also mention i m catholic and she is core protestant. That has also brought its own big challenges as well.

Olanna45:
Oga you are wrong oh. I have seen cases where the lady cursed both the father in law, husband's siblings and even there ancestors. Infront of the whole kindred

This whole thing boils down to personal character. it has nothing to do with tribe.

ariesbull:


Yes...But culture has a role to play ..Take it or leave it


Do you want examples

1Alex4u:
I am Igbo and married to a yoruba lady 3yrs now with no child. We moved to California USA about 2 yrs ago.

My wife can be lovely sometimes and a dare devil at other times!

My first issue with my wife is her mouth. It is as saucy and abusive as a completely illetrate woman under a abusive spell. She can 'curse' anytime...anywhere...and she can say anything even when we in public. I have cautioned, begged and even fought severally with her to express my dislike for abuses but she wouldn't just stop. We returned home
for xmas and we had a slight argument, next thing she gave me a very chilli curse in the presence of my siblings. Everyone kept mute and watched her in complete disbelief and suprise!!. I felt extremely embarassed. My elder bro had to callme aside and ask...is this first time she is doing this or is this what u have been covering up and enduring?
Pleas advice me ....what is the best way to curb this abusive habit frm my wife...is this generally a Yoruba habit or is it just with her??



Now the other issue i have with my wife is suspected unwilligness to accept and integrate into the igbo culture.

It started about few months after our wedding. We had a slight argument and then my younger sister called and greeted me in igbo. After i dropped the call, my wife pounced at me and told me never ever to speak igbo in the house if i wanted peace to rein. I couldn't believe my ears. You see, sometimes i dont blame men that raise their hands on a woman coz these are the kind of situations that can result to one. I had never been this provoked all my life like i was when she made that statement. I still wonder how she didny receive atleast 2 hot slaps that moment. We had a very big argument that day and kept malice for weeks. I kept late night and even smoked/drunk for the first time in my life.

Also, while in the usa... i noticed wheenever i mentioned travelling to my village to see extended relations, she will flair up and find one way or another to prevent us frm going. I had issues booking the flight tickets and she kept saying its God trying to
prevent us from going. When i finally succeeded in booking the flight, she called her mum to inform her that i was booking a trip to the village against her wish and i should be held responsible for whatever happens to her. She even at one point said any ritual fashioned against her will not prosper. See me see whalala
oo....!!
Although her dad had big issues with his relations and he moved to the city where he bought a house and stayed as his new abode and raised all his kids to acknowledge this new abode in the city as their home. So they were never close to any of her paternal relations. Infact none of her paternal relations came for our wedding to my greatest suprise.
On my end, i have a very extended relation from both parents and as i kid i always looked forward to travelling to the village to receonnect with relations and i still
maintain such reconnect till today.

Please i knw she reads this blog well. I need yoruba ladies who married igbo or any igbo lady to help enlighten her on igbo traditions and expectations as a wife of an igbo man. I regret not doing this before i got married atleast.

Apologies if too long...i just had ti pour out my hrt!!

1Alex4u:
Thanks all for the comements...advices and all. Clearly i failed to take actions against the behaviours i had observed while we courted....or simply put...i thought it was something i could change while in the marriage...but i v realised i cant....and that's y i came here for help.

Advice to folks...never assume any behavior of ur partner during marriage. If u cannot change it before marriage...then better opt out.

2ndly, its usually not so generally advisable togo for intertribal....sincerely. It just gets complicated and makes the marriage not so enjoyable at all when differences start to arrive. Compliments to all those who are currently in a good or working intertribal marriages though...but its best to avoid them if one can....saves alot of headaches.

I didnt also mention i m catholic and she is core protestant. That has also brought its own big challenges as well.

maclatunji:
OP, why did your wife marry you if she is so uncomfortable with your identity?

I understand the dynamic of spouses being against their in-laws for often silly reasons but this your wife's case seems extreme.

Did you portray yourself as a man who did not care about his extended family during courtship?

1Alex4u:
Thanks all for the comements...advices and all. Clearly i failed to take actions against the behaviours i had observed while we courted....or simply put...i thought it was something i could change while in the marriage...but i v realised i cant....and that's y i came here for help.

Advice to folks...never assume any behavior of ur partner during marriage. If u cannot change it before marriage...then better opt out.

2ndly, its usually not so generally advisable togo for intertribal....sincerely. It just gets complicated and makes the marriage not so enjoyable at all when differences start to arrive. Compliments to all those who are currently in a good or working intertribal marriages though...but its best to avoid them if one can....saves alot of headaches.

I didnt also mention i m catholic and she is core protestant. That has also brought its own big challenges as well.

EfemenaXY:


Oga. D'you believe everything you read here??

ariesbull:


Na now you know....chi efo...I hope they warned you before you married ..But you looked at the sweetness of toto and you thought marriage is all about toto. Know they have warned you and they warned you...


Dude..inter tribal marriages rarely work.a lot of baggages . Most people that are in it but present the picture that is working so that people will not tell them...shey we warned you

Bible is always correct when he said marry your type Even if you want to marry ..Marry neighbouring tribes not crossing seven seas and seven oceans to get a toto. That's madness and stupidity


Now back to you...Go and thank lord that she doesn't have a child for you. Then do the needful

thorpido:
@bolded,don't just put out assumptions as facts.How many inter-tribal marriages have you seen to conclude they are pretending.Inter-tribal marriages truly is not for everyone but for those whose minds are broadened and have gone beyond where they come from.

Which bible says you should marry your type meaning your tribe?

kaziblake:
meaning?
Do I look like ur mate?

ariesbull:



Go to exodus

1Alex4u:
I am Igbo and married to a yoruba lady 3yrs now with no child. We moved to California USA about 2 yrs ago.

My wife can be lovely sometimes and a dare devil at other times!

My first issue with my wife is her mouth. It is as saucy and abusive as a completely illetrate woman under a abusive spell. She can 'curse' anytime...anywhere...and she can say anything even when we in public. I have cautioned, begged and even fought severally with her to express my dislike for abuses but she wouldn't just stop. We returned home
for xmas and we had a slight argument, next thing she gave me a very chilli curse in the presence of my siblings. Everyone kept mute and watched her in complete disbelief and suprise!!. I felt extremely embarassed. My elder bro had to callme aside and ask...is this first time she is doing this or is this what u have been covering up and enduring?
Pleas advice me ....what is the best way to curb this abusive habit frm my wife...is this generally a Yoruba habit or is it just with her??



Now the other issue i have with my wife is suspected unwilligness to accept and integrate into the igbo culture.

It started about few months after our wedding. We had a slight argument and then my younger sister called and greeted me in igbo. After i dropped the call, my wife pounced at me and told me never ever to speak igbo in the house if i wanted peace to rein. I couldn't believe my ears. You see, sometimes i dont blame men that raise their hands on a woman coz these are the kind of situations that can result to one. I had never been this provoked all my life like i was when she made that statement. I still wonder how she didny receive atleast 2 hot slaps that moment. We had a very big argument that day and kept malice for weeks. I kept late night and even smoked/drunk for the first time in my life.

Also, while in the usa... i noticed wheenever i mentioned travelling to my village to see extended relations, she will flair up and find one way or another to prevent us frm going. I had issues booking the flight tickets and she kept saying its God trying to
prevent us from going. When i finally succeeded in booking the flight, she called her mum to inform her that i was booking a trip to the village against her wish and i should be held responsible for whatever happens to her. She even at one point said any ritual fashioned against her will not prosper. See me see whalala
oo....!!
Although her dad had big issues with his relations and he moved to the city where he bought a house and stayed as his new abode and raised all his kids to acknowledge this new abode in the city as their home. So they were never close to any of her paternal relations. Infact none of her paternal relations came for our wedding to my greatest suprise.
On my end, i have a very extended relation from both parents and as i kid i always looked forward to travelling to the village to receonnect with relations and i still
maintain such reconnect till today.

Please i knw she reads this blog well. I need yoruba ladies who married igbo or any igbo lady to help enlighten her on igbo traditions and expectations as a wife of an igbo man. I regret not doing this before i got married atleast.

Apologies if too long...i just had ti pour out my hrt!!

Olanna45:


Obviously you only want to point out your griveances against inter tribal marriage.

If at all your story is true, your wife has a bad character which you choose to negelect at the onset. It has nothing to do with tribe.

I have seen several inter tribal marriages that lasted for years and still counting.

Tribalizing every issue as a nation will not help.
Dalu kwa.

1Alex4u:
Thanks all for the comements...advices and all. Clearly i failed to take actions against the behaviours i had observed while we courted....or simply put...i thought it was something i could change while in the marriage...but i v realised i cant....and that's y i came here for help.

Advice to folks...never assume any behavior of ur partner during marriage. If u cannot change it before marriage...then better opt out.

2ndly, its usually not so generally advisable togo for intertribal....sincerely. It just gets complicated and makes the marriage not so enjoyable at all when differences start to arrive. Compliments to all those who are currently in a good or working intertribal marriages though...but its best to avoid them if one can....saves alot of headaches.

I didnt also mention i m catholic and she is core protestant. That has also brought its own big challenges as well
.

NIGHTMAREOO7:


U are getting something wrong here.
Yes intertribal marriages work
Buy wen its Yoruba woman and igbo man its always problem most times... It is a bitter truth.
Yoruba women fnt respect igbo men do to wat their parent tells them...

Of all the igboman/yorubawoman woman wedding I kno I can tell u less than 5% is smooth and successful..

Apart from op story.

Oc okeje wedding with yoruba woman is having issues.

Psquare family starts having issues after marring a yoruba woman.. The woman starts claiming pquare brother don't respect her.. Way rubbish!!.

One of my distant uncle married yoruba woman now the man doesn't come back to d village again.

I know a friend who his brother mareid yoruba woman and its still d same story.

THIS IS THE BITTER TRUTH BUT U GUYS WILL JUST LOGIN HERE TO FORM "ONYEOMA CY".. JUST TO GAIN LIKE.. RUBBISH!

waternogetememy:



Na Igbo women and Yoruba men marriage no get wahala?

Guy, one woman from the next village that claimed to be in love with this yoruba Medical Doctor and married him, was pushed down from the first floor wen they were fighting and subsequently died.

Another one that married a yoruba guy and joined him abroad, only to later call the police on him for throwing his telephone at her head during an arguement.

They evicted the guy from the house and marriage don sactter.

U look closely at Nigeria celebrity the few igbo women that married yoruba men, u will see that the relationship did not last.

It often ends with her holding one child and abandoned. Monalisa Chinda, Uche Iwuji, Ann Njemanze and co