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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / My Ex Or My New Man? (36854 Views)
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Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by karrim4real(m): 11:21pm On Jan 26, 2017 |
bbjummy:
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Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by mecussey(m): 11:21pm On Jan 26, 2017 |
prestigiouslady: Sorry but all theses story faults you. I dont have time to type but u know, u already want to leave. You are at fault.... |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by Chaquil: 11:21pm On Jan 26, 2017 |
Just pray about it............... |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by Dione007(m): 11:25pm On Jan 26, 2017 |
prestigiouslady: as bad as it sounds, there is nothing you can do... For better for worse remember...you should have know what you were getting into during courtship. Even if you end up getting divorced, you are not permitted to marry again while he is alive... That my dear is a great sin 1 Like |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by Nobody: 11:31pm On Jan 26, 2017 |
Amelian:that true |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by tomdon(m): 11:32pm On Jan 26, 2017 |
keepingmum: So she should avoid a man who wants her and she wants equally?? How some people think ehnnn |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by TonyeBarcanista(m): 11:33pm On Jan 26, 2017 |
prestigiouslady:He loves you but I think he has this feeling that showing you would make you grow to be the kind of a wife his mum is/was to his dad. FEAR! I will advice that you allow him the break and time to time visit him. DON'T chat with him please, you may call him to greet him too and send him text messages, but PLEASE refrain from asking him questions like "when are you coming back" "do you want divorce" etc. As a married Christian, you don't need to complicate your life by thinking of another man or contemplating divorce. To answer your question, he thinks of you daily but with time he will confess to you. TO SHARE MY PARENTS STORY: During the early years of marriage, my dad acted inappropriately by sending my mom home (my paternal grandma however accommodated my mom). I don't know how long Momsy stayed with granny but when her husband, my dad was tired, he used his own leg to go bring back his wife. Today, they are happy even after 4 decades. My mom was a Christian and her God fought for her! I can tell you that my dad knew Christ through her. In your prayer, just pray that God should arrest him and frustrate every evil plan to scatter your home. You both are joined before God Almighty. I know some frustrated people that are neither married nor believe in the sanctity of marriage will laugh at the mention of God and prayer, but is there anything God cannot do? God cares! 3 Likes |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by Nobody: 11:35pm On Jan 26, 2017 |
dinachi:diz ya mouth eh daw cut it for you 1day |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by TonyeBarcanista(m): 11:42pm On Jan 26, 2017 |
Amelian:If you are happily married or believe in the sanctity of marriage, you won't be going from thread to thread advising divorce on every issue, neither will you follow the path of some misguided advanced unmarried ladies to always shout divorce whenever things go south. We know these things In any marriage, all efforts must be made to salvage the home EXCEPT in cases of physical abuse, which is criminal and must be dealt with to the latter. Cheating is another strong ground for divorce. Anyway, I don talk finish... 1 Like |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by baby124: 11:42pm On Jan 26, 2017 |
TonyeBarcanista:What about the twins he is expecting? And the fact that she is even aware he was in a full fledged public relationship while she is waiting. Will you advice your own child to stay in such a marriage? What next when he gets bored or distracted again ![]() |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by Ifecoded(m): 11:46pm On Jan 26, 2017 |
tomdon:It's actually how you think that should be criticised.. She once want that man she's Referring to as her Ex and The Ex of a guy too, once wants her. Am having a feeling there is more to this than the OP is putting up here, how can a mother ignore her grandchild for a year nt to talk of 2yrs. Is Op sure she hasn't done something stupid and she's here making us finger our brains?? All I av to say is be full of prayers and only pray by yourself or talk to Pastor or Priest that has earned your trust. Some so called man of satan in Man of God's form are waiting to take advantage of situations like this. . . Mores o, you need to be careful in your decision making, if you re moving on, make sure it's the very right choice by praying earnestly( I knw it's a sin, considering the fact that ur husband isn't dead yet) or rather channel those prayers to making your current marriage work. The heart of the Kings and chiefs is in God's hands. Ask God to change his heart, if you truly want him back as u claimed. . . I just wish there's nothing like heartbreak. |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by prestigiouslady: 11:46pm On Jan 26, 2017 |
baby124: He just asked me, not that he is really expecting baby(ies) anywhere...so I think |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by TonyeBarcanista(m): 11:46pm On Jan 26, 2017 |
baby124:And who told you he is expecting twins? Because he asked a question? Well until she confirm his unfaithfulness or sees such signs, she should keep pushing hard. But if it turns out that he is seeing another woman, then it is a strong ground to seek divorce- but let's not be quick to reach conclusion |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by Nobody: 11:46pm On Jan 26, 2017 |
TonyeBarcanista: Who is going from thread to thread campaigning divorce? ![]() Get your facts right before spewing rubbish on my mentions. It's good u don talk finish.. I didn't ask your opinion on any issue before. So please carry your mentions elsewhere. And face front. |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by TonyeBarcanista(m): 11:49pm On Jan 26, 2017 |
prestigiouslady:He actually wanted you to feel jealous by asking that. That's another pointer that he thinks of you. Guys do it! 1 Like |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by baby124: 11:49pm On Jan 26, 2017 |
prestigiouslady:Ok. Goodluck to you. Keep waiting. May all your dreams come true. Make sure to let the other man go while you are waiting so he can find someone who is ready. 2 Likes |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by mecussey(m): 11:50pm On Jan 26, 2017 |
raumdeuter: very intelligent questions...that marriage was built on slippery foundation hence the indecition in everybody. Op have not said everything yet...she thinks before she write here...you may never get the right info. She has never faulted herself, does it mean she was never wrong? Adonbilivit 2 Likes |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by baby124: 11:51pm On Jan 26, 2017 |
TonyeBarcanista:Did you not read where he kicked her out? Why will he mention the possibility of twins if it was not true? Does that not mean he is probably actively trying for twins? Did you not read where she was aware of his new relationship ![]() 2 Likes |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by prestigiouslady: 11:52pm On Jan 26, 2017 |
@ifecoded, mecussy..I'm not a saint but I know I've not done anything to warrant this.. If I have, his friends won't be supporting me, one of his closest friend has refused to speakto him in two years cos of the way he treated me.. His extended family and siblings (except one and his mum) are in great support of me and they talk to me And encourage me... If am a bad DIL, they won't do that. He told me and he tells everyone that I'm a good woman but he just doesn't know what's wrong. We fight like every other couple and we settle it amicably...I don't just know where things went wrong |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by TonyeBarcanista(m): 11:55pm On Jan 26, 2017 |
baby124:I read from page 0 to the last before dropping my comments. I am a guy, we say silly things to get the reaction of the people we love to know how much we mean to them. I didn't see where she made mention of a new relationship, can you refer me to such comment? 1 Like |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by prestigiouslady: 11:59pm On Jan 26, 2017 |
TonyeBarcanista: I'm not in a relationship yet, still on friendship basis, the new guy told me of his intention but I've not given him a reply. I was just considering if I should have a rethink since my marriage isn't working despite all effort to fix it |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by Ifecoded(m): 12:00am On Jan 27, 2017 |
mecussey:This is exactly what am talking about... Op is keeping a lot of things here( wise of you tho) How come your only offense is talking back when ur husband comes up with his deeds?? No matter how bad a wifey u re, or how hard your in-law wants your marriage to crash, your mother-in-law will still care abt her grandchild.. mani an soro e yi. This is a child her own son begat. There is more to that. May God help all the same. 1 Like |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by nefertitiram: 12:03am On Jan 27, 2017 |
OldBeer: TAaah! It's olive oil |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by baby124: 12:04am On Jan 27, 2017 |
TonyeBarcanista:Read her first post again carefully on page 1. She said he has moved on and is showcasing a new lady. No man in his right mind who has a kid will play silly games. He even went as far as blocking her on all communication. His own wife! He has obviously not even bothered to find out how his child is doing. That is the guy you advise her to have patience for. She will die being hurt repeatedly by him. He's a broken guy and will keep destroying things till he dies. It is her decision to respect herself and child or continue being his beast of torture aka eran iya. She will wake up in 10yrs bitter and full of regrets if she keeps this up. It will just be a pathetic cycle. 2 Likes |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by prestigiouslady: 12:06am On Jan 27, 2017 |
Ifecoded: If not because of identity and that of his, I would have called on friends that are nairalander to come say it as it is.. My MIL has her reservations about me from the onset but I'm not particularly concerned about her but for the man I'm married to. |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by TonyeBarcanista(m): 12:06am On Jan 27, 2017 |
prestigiouslady:Honestly, the other dude shouldn't even be in the picture AT ALL!!! If he was perfect then why couldn't he salvage his crashed marriage? People only show their angelic side when chasing for relationship but their real self comes out during cohabitation. I don't know the age of your man but I think he's still growing up, with time he will realise his misdeeds towards his wife. Please, also search yourself and repent from any attitude that turns him off... I believe your home will bounce back. 1 Like |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by Nobody: 12:08am On Jan 27, 2017 |
prestigiouslady:Stop sitting around waiting for him to change his mind... 1 Like |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by nefertitiram: 12:13am On Jan 27, 2017 |
mecussey: If you read the initial post, she faulted herself and took 50% responsibility. Her husband has baggage, he deserves to be alone. Until he can let go of his childhood inhibitions about having a domineering woman, he cannot be truly free and have a normal life. 1 Like |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by TonyeBarcanista(m): 12:13am On Jan 27, 2017 |
baby124:Original content taken down: After seeing that he has a new GF, my advice to OP is simple. Infidelity is a strong case for divorce both in common law and Biblically. He broke the marriage vow. You have the choice to either forgive him and try to make things work or give him some more time (say 6months) before making decision to quit. God Help you MODIFIED: I had to reread again o.. I apologise sincerely! Pls forgive my mistake. |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by Nobody: 12:16am On Jan 27, 2017 |
TonyeBarcanista: prestigiouslady: |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by baby124: 12:16am On Jan 27, 2017 |
TonyeBarcanista:If you still did not see it. Then you either need an eye check or you are being dishonest. It is right there for you to read. You obviously do not believe your comments on this thread because if you did, you will not try to make excuses by shifting the blame on me(so funny). |
Re: My Ex Or My New Man? by baby124: 12:18am On Jan 27, 2017 |
1bkaye:He does not believe all the jagbajantis advise he is giving her. Don't even bother yourself. He obviously did not read or is being dishonest. He said previously that cheating is grounds for divorce. He obviously shot himself in the foot there. 1 Like |
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