I opened this thread to solicit members of this thread for support or advice to women living with cheating partners. Raised by a single mother myself, I understand the plight of motherhood, especially when there is nobody to to for assistance.

By common Nigerian wife, I mean the regular woman with no influence in the society. She may be a housewife, a trader or a working class woman but because she's not very rich and has to rely on her husband for family support, she has to endure and suffer silently in a Nigerian society that is quick to applaud a cheating husband and in the same breath give the thumbs down when a wife does same.

This has discouraged and rendered many women living with cheating partners powerless and unable to protest, more especially the uneducated ones among them. They are either left with the options to endure, sulk, nag or look for ways to attack the husband snatchers. Only a few can muster up courage to walk out of the marriage like my mama; and she took me along because her father in-law supported her.

Sadly, feminism in Nigeria is a comic play. It is mainly in theory and hardly in practice. Only successful women with high profiles and celebrities have the the privilege to speak out and be listened to - and that's because they're richer and more popular than their partners.

www.nairaland.com/attachments/5035140_cheatinghusband_jpeg8ad6566c293ecdc8b2510a5f5a105eb6

Lalasticlala, Dominique

The best thing is to bow out of such marriage. Marriage is never meant for suffering, neglect, cheating etc. It is meant to be enjoyed and not endured.

ikbnice:
The best thing is to bow out of such marriage. Marriage is never meant for suffering, neglect, cheating etc. It is meant to be enjoyed and not endured.

These ones can't bow out of such marriages. They'd rather choose to endure.

The best thing that could happen to any woman is to get an education, make sure you're not solely dependent on your husband. So when he starts sleeping around like a "Dog", you would simply walk out of his life and have nothing to loose.

For better or worse till death..... But honestly she has none

ikbnice:
The best thing is to bow out of such marriage. Marriage is never meant for suffering, neglect, cheating etc. It is meant to be enjoyed and not endured.

These ones can't bow out of such marriages. They'd rather choose to endure.

The best thing that could happen to any woman is to get an education, make sure you're not solely dependent on your husband. So when he starts sleeping around like a "Dog", you would simply walk out of his life and have nothing to loose.

kimbra:
These ones can't bow out of such marriages. They'd rather choose to endure.

The best thing that could happen to any woman is to get an education, make sure you're not solely dependent on your husband. So when he starts sleeping around like a "Dog", you would simply walk out of his life and have nothing to lose.

This is why a girl should erase that mentality of being someone else property and being use and toss around like rag. Most guys out now are not worth the sacrifice.

I society that is quick to applaud a cheating husband.
Where did you get that??

ikbnice:
This is why a girl should erase that mentality of being someone else property and being use and toss around like rag. Most guys out now are not worth the sacrifice.

Exactly!, most get married not knowing what they're getting into and then feel there's always an option to cheat. Anyone that could toy with as sacred as marital vows are, isn't worth calling a man but a boy. So I assume these women ended up marring boys who had the physique of men but were mentally boys.

It's indeed sad and a divorce is permissible in an adulterous union. Not for lack of education but lack of confidence and low self esteem will a woman remain in such a union.

nnamdibig:
I society that is quick to applaud a cheating husband.
Where did you get that??

The Nigerian society.

I've thought about it myself and really, it's a difficult decision to make.

Honestly, if Nigerian women were divorcing their husbands because of infidelity, I'm not sure there would be any married couple left.

divorce no be beans and it's only easier if the woman is alot independent, financially and less religious.


Divorce is not easy in Nigeria, especially when kids are involved.

ikbnice:
This is why a girl should erase that mentality of being someone else property and being use and toss around like rag. Most guys out now are not worth the sacrifice.

You are 100% right lot of useless men out there

pcguru1:

You are 100% right lot of useless men out there

useless is even an understatement They are shamelessly irresponsible and absolutely useless. The funniest part is they have good partners and that makes one wonder why God allows bad things to happen to good people.

Not all men cheat. I repeat there are still good men out there.

Joavid:
I've thought about it myself and really, it's a difficult decision to make.

Honestly, if Nigerian women were divorcing their husbands because of infidelity, I'm not sure there would be any married couple left.

divorce no be beans and it's only easier if the woman is alot independent, financially and less religious.


Divorce is not easy in Nigeria, especially when kids are involved.

You made valid points with the emboldened. In fact, I've thought about it myself, with a deep consideration to the children factor (it's easier for a woman to walk away when there are no children) but my worry is for the those who are more like victims than wives to their husbands. The Nigerian system do not frown at cheating husbands but they will quickly crucify a wife for infidelity. What is the hope for them? Are they just going to fold their arms and pretend all is well or cry their eyes out and still do nothing?

There's no hope....the only hope left is to run for your life or do tit for tat

Joromi1:

You made valid points with the emboldened. In fact, I've thought about it myself, with a deep consideration to the children factor (it's easier for a woman to walk away when there are no children) but my worry is for the those who are more like victims than wives to their husbands. The Nigerian system do not frown at cheating husbands but they will quickly crucify a wife for infidelity. What is the hope for them? Are they just going to fold their arms and pretend all is well or cry their eyes out and still do nothing?

https://www.nairaland.com/3691205/depressed-wife-needs-urgent-advice#54741029

the victim mentality is the worst to have.
They always need help.


But you see, the world is undergoing a major plot twist. Marriage is slowly being demystified as an ineffective system.

More people than ever are following other routes to seek what biology has enslaved us to.

All it'll take is a higher living standard, and our population will become sane again.