Pls nairalanders, I am in deep mess right now. I have been living in my compound for 6 yrs now but due to some money issues I was evicted and my friend/fellow tenant was kind enough to take me in for the time being. It is him the wife and their small baby son that stays.

The problem started when the wife start complaining that am wasteful. i have never remained food they give me. from then they reduced quantity of food they give me and i dont complain.

Now just this morning am making tea and take 3 spoons of milk in her presence and all hell break loose. she starts shouting and call her husband that even them dont take more than 2 spoons. the man called me later and said it is time for us to part ways.

Am devastated now. i even used my last cash to buy a tin of milk for them. what do i do now? i have no where to go.

stressedout:
pls nairalanders i am in deep mess right now. i have been living in my compound for 6 yrs now but due to some money issues i was evicted and my friend/fellow tenant was kind enough to take me in for the time being. It is him the wife and their small baby son that stays.

the problem started when the wife start complaining that am wasteful. i have never remained food they give me. from then they reduced quantity of food they give me and i dont complain.

Now just this morning am making tea and take 3 spoons of milk in her presence and all hell break loose. she starts shouting and call her husband that even them dont take more than 2 spoons. the man called me later and said it is time for us to part ways.

Am devastated now. i even used my last cash to buy a tin of milk for them. what do i do now? i have no where to go.

Don't you have brother or sister or relatives?

K

Bros I feel ur pain it is nt easy to live wit som1 who is married, firstly the wife dont like u, secondly u should hav reduce the amount of food u take becus ur friend will always choose his wife over u

I888:


Don't you have brother or sister or relatives?

my closest relative is in calabar. i am in lagos

modify: please all the insult am getting is not called for. am on my way to calabar. you people are mean!

frostland:
Bros I feel ur pain it is nt easy to live wit som1 who is married, firstly the wife dont like u, secondly u should hav reduce the amount of food u take becus ur friend will always choose his wife over u

they put my food for me. i dont take by myself. Anyone who can take me in should pm me. am fed up.

stressedout:
pls nairalanders i am in deep mess right now. i have been living in my compound for 6 yrs now but due to some money issues i was evicted and my friend/fellow tenant was kind enough to take me in for the time being. It is him the wife and their small baby son that stays.

the problem started when the wife start complaining that am wasteful. i have never remained food they give me. from then they reduced quantity of food they give me and i dont complain.

Now just this morning am making tea and take 3 spoons of milk in her presence and all hell break loose. she starts shouting and call her husband that even them dont take more than 2 spoons. the man called me later and said it is time for us to part ways.

Am devastated now. i even used my last cash to buy a tin of milk for them. what do i do now? i have no where to go.

How long have you stayed with them? Your time with the family is obviously out. It's not about the milk, you will not have peace since you are not hearing the shout out. When it comes to this, women no dey chill.

stressedout:
my closest relative is in calabar. i am in lagos

what you need to know is that Lagos is HARD to survive and that is why most people living there are hostile. It takes a lot of guts and brazen maneuvers to survive in Lagos and almost everyone is managing, except the political elite class.

The wife clearly doesn't want you in that house and have been feeding her husband with some thoughts.

I would advice you find a way to sort yourself out.

stressedout:
my closest relative is in calabar. i am in lagos

Relocate to calabar. I'll accommodate you.

stressedout:
my closest relative is in calabar. i am in lagos

Please its better you leave that house before you are poisoned,please even if you have to go back to your relatives in calabar.Who knows,you might see an helper there,there people in Lagos with all his prospects who are still paupers, while there are people in the village who are rich.
Don't be downcasted,at least the guy is not your blood brother, I know a guy who left his brother's house because of insults he gets from the wife,just because he was jobless. The week he left,that was when he got a job.

Have you considered going back to the village?


What's your occupation??

Story story.

It goes beyond the milk my friend.....

Truth is an extra mouth to feed in these hard times will put a strain on any family and some people are unable to hide thier pressures from external parties!

We don't know for how long you've stayed with them for eg and whether you currently have a source of income.

Begin to restrategise! Thank your friend for accommodating you so far and ask him to please bear with you a little longer.

Get something doing even if it's a labourer's job - earn some income and get your place asap!

Contribute to the household - buy soap, bread , vegetables ; wash plates ; fetch water ; sweep etc . You must contribute no matter how little!

Where there is a will there is a way!

God help us all

You're still looking for person that will accommodate you instead of planning your way back to village. What you're doing in Lagos doesn't favour you since you can't afford a room.

stressedout:
pls nairalanders i am in deep mess right now. i have been living in my compound for 6 yrs now but due to some money issues i was evicted and my friend/fellow tenant was kind enough to take me in for the time being. It is him the wife and their small baby son that stays.

the problem started when the wife start complaining that am wasteful. i have never remained food they give me. from then they reduced quantity of food they give me and i dont complain.

Now just this morning am making tea and take 3 spoons of milk in her presence and all hell break loose. she starts shouting and call her husband that even them dont take more than 2 spoons. the man called me later and said it is time for us to part ways.

Am devastated now. i even used my last cash to buy a tin of milk for them. what do i do now? i have no where to go.

Humility is a virtue you should embrace. Your topic " ordinary" is a turn off. When somebody is giving you something they don't owe you, you don't get to dictate what is ordinary or not. If it were ordinary, you should have bought your own milk. The fact that you have a roof over your head after your eviction is due to their generosity and who knows how big the apartment is but still they invited you in.

If your hosts say an extra spoon of milk is too much to stomach and they are causing drama because of that, you have 2 options:

Start to buy your own food or contribute to feeding and hope they will allow you decide your own quantity of consumption
Leave their house

You don't get to decide what is ordinary in another person's house.

stressedout:
they put my food for me. i dont take by myself. Anyone who can take me in should pm me. am fed up.

What is with the servile beggarly attitude?Mtchew.I hate it when i see men who can't hustle.
Look at the way you are even talking.You cant even ask for a job.You cant list things you can do in exchange for money, you just want someone to take you in.You are even an ingrate complaining about food and milk.If you want to rise above you need think of the value you can add to society and provide it.The world will beat a part to. Your door.And don't be too proud to do anything.
Here is coming from someone who has been broke, hungru and trekked unholy distances before.And im a woman so please-as they say-be a man

If you could afford the ordinary milk, you will not be squatting with them and living on them like a parasite or their second child. You are a full grown man, try to find little work to do to contribute something in that home. That woman is probably managing to feed her family and there you are, eating, drinking, using electricity and swallowing 3 spoons of milk. Are they your family? If you can't find work, go back to your village. You have obviously overstayed there.

Nonsense

no be people dey sleep under oshodi bridge


U went to stay with a married person

do u reason at all

The wife even did good by giving u food

go n hustle bro
or call ur relatives to send u money

bye

stressedout:
pls nairalanders i am in deep mess right now. i have been living in my compound for 6 yrs now but due to some money issues i was evicted and my friend/fellow tenant was kind enough to take me in for the time being. It is him the wife and their small baby son that stays.

the problem started when the wife start complaining that am wasteful. i have never remained food they give me. from then they reduced quantity of food they give me and i dont complain.

Now just this morning am making tea and take 3 spoons of milk in her presence and all hell break loose. she starts shouting and call her husband that even them dont take more than 2 spoons. the man called me later and said it is time for us to part ways.

Am devastated now. i even used my last cash to buy a tin of milk for them. what do i do now? i have no where to go.

This is entitlement.You feel you should be treated differently.It is not your house and do you even know their finacial situation?Probably they sre struggling to feed an extra mouth.I cannot even believe you have brought this to Nairaland.Go to your family and if you do not have move out and stay somewhere else,instead of you complaining about what does not belong to you.
I truly wonder how you will be able to move forward with this mindset.One should be very careful with you.You are dangerous.

The "Ordinary milk" in the subject of the thread irked me. The lady had every right to be mad at you...please what quantity of tea do you make that you had to use 3spoons of milk?. That's too much for someone living off others whether you presumed they had enough to throw around.

Over familiarity breeds contempt. You've over stayed your welcome, kindly relocate.

baby124:
If you could afford the ordinary milk, you will not be squatting with them and living on them like a parasite or their second child. You are a full grown man, try to find little work to do to contribute something in that home. That woman is probably managing to feed her family and there you are, eating, drinking, using electricity and swallowing 3 spoons of milk. Are they your family? If you can't find work, go back to your village. You have obviously overstayed there.

Lol harsh but realist

stressedout:
pls nairalanders i am in deep mess right now. i have been living in my compound for 6 yrs now but due to some money issues i was evicted and my friend/fellow tenant was kind enough to take me in for the time being. It is him the wife and their small baby son that stays.

the problem started when the wife start complaining that am wasteful. i have never remained food they give me. from then they reduced quantity of food they give me and i dont complain.

Now just this morning am making tea and take 3 spoons of milk in her presence and all hell break loose. she starts shouting and call her husband that even them dont take more than 2 spoons. the man called me later and said it is time for us to part ways.

Am devastated now. i even used my last cash to buy a tin of milk for them. what do i do now? i have no where to go.

Broh, the blunt truth is that your friend is uncomfortable with you being there and feels you have overstayed your welcome. The handwriting is on the wall, read it.

Benita27:
The "Ordinary milk" in the subject of the thread irked me. The lady had every right to be mad at you...please what quantity of tea do you make that you had to use 3spoons of milk?. That's too much for someone living off others whether you presumed they had enough to throw around.

Over familiarity breed contempt. You've over stayed your welcome, kindly relocate.

This is my mind, must He even use milk? 3 spoons? Why? Too much nau, he so wasteful, children need milk more and besides, must you eat everytime they give you? Why not restrict your feeding from them to just once per day? Go and look for job, any type of job at least to feed urself

janefarms2015:


This is my mind, must He even use milk? 3 spoons? Why? Too much nau, he so wasteful, children need milk more and besides, must you eat everytime they give you? Why not restrict your feeding from them to just once per day? Go and look for job, any type of job at least to feed urself

No, Some people can't do anything, anything would hurt their pride so they'd rather seat back and be liabilities to others.

StevensJojo:

What is with the servile beggarly attitude?Mtchew.I hate it when i see men who can't hustle.
Look at the way you are even talking.You cant even ask for a job.You cant list things you can do in exchange for money, you just want someone to take you in.You are even an ingrate complaining about food and milk.If you want to rise above you need think of the value you can add to society and provide it.The world will beat a part to. Your door.And don't be too proud to do anything.
Here is coming from someone who has been broke, hungru and trekked unholy distances before.And im a woman so please-as they say-be a man

fear women

StevensJojo:

What is with the servile beggarly attitude?Mtchew.I hate it when i see men who can't hustle.
Look at the way you are even talking.You cant even ask for a job.You cant list things you can do in exchange for money, you just want someone to take you in.You are even an ingrate complaining about food and milk.If you want to rise above you need think of the value you can add to society and provide it.The world will beat a part to. Your door.And don't be too proud to do anything.
Here is coming from someone who has been broke, hungru and trekked unholy distances before.And im a woman so please-as they say-be a man

thanks for the advice. it is clear. i have to leave that house. i will pack my things today and leave for calabar first things tomorrow. Why i say ordinary is because these people are not suffering at all, they live well. i did not live there free. i did various jobs for the man and even stayed in the wifes store where she sells provisions. This is someone i senior with over 5 yrs. such behaviour was not so at the beginning now i am almost treated as if i came to do househelp. so i will never rely on anyone again as man can fail, but God never fails.

stressedout:
thanks for the advice. it is clear. i have to leave that house. i will pack my things today and leave for calabar first things tomorrow. Why i say ordinary is because these people are not suffering at all, they live well. i did not live there free. i did various jobs for the man and even stayed in the wifes store where she sells provisions. This is someone i senior with over 5 yrs. such behaviour was not so at the beginning now i am almost treated as if i came to do househelp. so i will never rely on anyone again as man can fail, but God never fails.

Sense of entitlement.

The woman was managing her shop without you, the hubby was coping fine without you too so your excuses don't hold water. So instead of you to go out and hustle na the woman provision store you dey go Sidon put? Chai, and you complain of bring treated like a help?, Abeg were u unemployed before you got evicted?

Please leave morrow. See why people rarely help people? It almost never ends well. You feel they owe you shyte and u you are doing the wife a favor, the wife sees you as another ungrateful, jobless mouth to feed. Now you guys would part way with grudges in your hearts.

StevensJojo:

What is with the servile beggarly attitude?Mtchew.I hate it when i see men who can't hustle.
Look at the way you are even talking.You cant even ask for a job.You cant list things you can do in exchange for money, you just want someone to take you in.You are even an ingrate complaining about food and milk.If you want to rise above you need think of the value you can add to society and provide it.The world will beat a part to. Your door.And don't be too proud to do anything.
Here is coming from someone who has been broke, hungru and trekked unholy distances before.And im a woman so please-as they say-be a man

your reply is full of arrogance, i won't be surprise if people like you control their husband.

PS: they were nice to you in the early days because they probably thought you would :
Bath and leave the house every morning to your place of work
The arrangement was a temporal one. Two weeks maybe, and you are gone.

You rather mistook their generosity as being made landlord of the house and even going to the woman's provision store to help.

Bringing the age thing just goes to show you are full of dry, empty pride. Dem dey use age or seniority collect tin of milk or money for bank?

I wish I saw this post on time.


I will be bold to say my mind here. These days, it has become common for a man to say "I stayed in a rented house for 4 years, 6years, etc, without paying the landlord his rent. At the end of the period the landlord got fed up and throw me out". Rubbish. It is impossible for a trully responsible man to be jobless, doing nothing for a long time and consequently not be able to meet up with is responsilities. Haba. I don't just get these folks. How can you wait until you are thrown out of your house before you begin to sort yourself out. Even more shameful is going to put up with a fellow tenant. God forbid. I just wonder that many men these donn't know what being a man is.

@op, go out and hustle. Leave your pride behind and do whatever it takes to take good care of yourself and reclaim your self respect if that is important to you. Then, go and rent a shack and start all over again. Can't just word up all my thoughts now.

stressedout:
thanks for the advice. it is clear. i have to leave that house. i will pack my things today and leave for calabar first things tomorrow. Why i say ordinary is because these people are not suffering at all, they live well. i did not live there free. i did various jobs for the man and even stayed in the wifes store where she sells provisions. This is someone i senior with over 5 yrs. such behaviour was not so at the beginning now i am almost treated as if i came to do househelp. so i will never rely on anyone again as man can fail, but God never fails.

They treated you like an house help because you have over stayed your welcome.

jieta:
your reply is full of arrogance, i won't be surprise if people like you control their husband.

Lol.I saw your first response.When you waited for a while and didnt get a reply you came to edit it to see if youl get a rise from me.
Well sir iv noticed you.You can now enjoy the rest of your holidays.