Immee:
Hello fellow nairalanders, pls advise needed on this issue.

My bf and I have been together for a while now and planning on having our marriage introduction by November and marriage proper early next year.

Im an independent woman with a gud job. As a matter of fact, ive never made any financial request from this guy though he buys gift for me without requesting. He is doing well financially too, he runs a recycling factory while I work with a manufacturing company.

Things are working well between us since the relationship started untill recently when we had some business deals together ( my opinion though) cos I don't understand him anymore. He was broke at that time and needed to get some materials which he never budgeted for. He requested that I invest in his company by paying for those materials since they're coming cheap and he doesn't have enough to get them at that time and wouldn't want to loose the opportunity. I consented to the idea cos I knew he's business was very lucrative and that I'll get my money back with interest. He promised to be paying me a weekly dividend so I thought of giving 1 million naira. I made an instant transfer of 500k to his account as dts the maximum I can do daily without a token and I wasn't with it then.

The 2nd day dt I was suppose to send the remaining money, some issues occurred in his company in my presence. He had some major issues with some of the equipments in his factory. He had to stop productions for some days. So i with held the balance as it wont be neccesary since there was no production.While repairs were ongoing? I had to liase with some of my junior colleagues at work who are engineers to help my bf cos I found out he's engineer's aren't capable of handling the situation as dts the first time he would experience such. As God will have it operations started back in few days with the support of my engineers.

My concern now is since things went back to normal in my bf compan' he's yet to keep to his promise of the weekly dividend he said I would be receiving from the investment. As a matter of fact , things has changed between us cos he no longer call and hardly pick my calls. I communicate with him mostly thru SMS now since he wouldn't pick my calls. I'd sent messages to him to return my money without interest and he has promised to pay back with no time and date of when he's going to pay back. I even had plans of going to his place today since im off work so as to force him to go to the bank with him so DT I can get my money but he left the house early in the morning with excuses that he has a place to go and would return to my place after leaving there.

Pls guys how best can I get this money back from him cos I know he has it but playing pranks on me. I don't mind loosing my relationship with him as I don't trust him any longer.

VampireeM:
How long have you both been dating

I think you be been duped o. Seems like the guy had his eyes on your money and never had good intentions all these while. My dear you better involve the police if you want your money back.

Blackhawk01:


He fvcked up big time. Op must get her money back oooo.

I don't, I totally disagree. Only an idiot, self - centered person is capable of doing such. I just need you to let me know what's going on and we're cool.

Immee:
Hello fellow nairalanders, pls advise needed on this issue.

My bf and I have been together for a while now and planning on having our marriage introduction by November and marriage proper early next year.

Im an independent woman with a gud job. As a matter of fact, ive never made any financial request from this guy though he buys gift for me without requesting. He is doing well financially too, he runs a recycling factory while I work with a manufacturing company.

Things are working well between us since the relationship started untill recently when we had some business deals together ( my opinion though) cos I don't understand him anymore. He was broke at that time and needed to get some materials which he never budgeted for. He requested that I invest in his company by paying for those materials since they're coming cheap and he doesn't have enough to get them at that time and wouldn't want to loose the opportunity. I consented to the idea cos I knew he's business was very lucrative and that I'll get my money back with interest. He promised to be paying me a weekly dividend so I thought of giving 1 million naira. I made an instant transfer of 500k to his account as dts the maximum I can do daily without a token and I wasn't with it then.

The 2nd day dt I was suppose to send the remaining money, some issues occurred in his company in my presence. He had some major issues with some of the equipments in his factory. He had to stop productions for some days. So i with held the balance as it wont be neccesary since there was no production.While repairs were ongoing? I had to liase with some of my junior colleagues at work who are engineers to help my bf cos I found out he's engineer's aren't capable of handling the situation as dts the first time he would experience such. As God will have it operations started back in few days with the support of my engineers.

My concern now is since things went back to normal in my bf compan' he's yet to keep to his promise of the weekly dividend he said I would be receiving from the investment. As a matter of fact , things has changed between us cos he no longer call and hardly pick my calls. I communicate with him mostly thru SMS now since he wouldn't pick my calls. I'd sent messages to him to return my money without interest and he has promised to pay back with no time and date of when he's going to pay back. I even had plans of going to his place today since im off work so as to force him to go to the bank with him so DT I can get my money but he left the house early in the morning with excuses that he has a place to go and would return to my place after leaving there.

Pls guys how best can I get this money back from him cos I know he has it but playing pranks on me. I don't mind loosing my relationship with him as I don't trust him any longer.

Daeylar:


Lol, I told someone about this and the person first of all laughed and then told me to forget it that the money is gone, lol, the part if your statement I bolded just reminded me of that,
I hope she is able to get her money back, I also hope they settle and make up.

nkwuocha, rosalieene, what do you guys think.

Elesta:


Some guys are very crafty oh,lead u up to d stage of marriage just to scam u.How come its after u gave him the money that he suddenly stopped pucking your calls?U took a huge risk by lending him such huge amount of money.

I suggest you start looking for a way to collect the money back oh. Make up a pathetic story,tell him someone in your family is not feeling fine. Fake tears if possible.

Let's see how he will respond.
My humble suggestion. I hate it when guys try to scam ladies

supersystemsnig:
It is well. What do we do? We need to marry females, we need them to love us, nurture and train our kids, take care of the home and support us in every way possible while we're handling other matters....


What's the way out with all this women-mistrust that is pervasive in this society ?

TheRealestGuy:


You are a callous and wicked person.

You aren't even sure if he's broken even, you're not trying to be supportive, you're not even giving him a few weeks to stabilize after some production problems. All you're after is your miserly 500k that you lent to him.

You don't ever deserve to be married cos your type will turn to Jezebel if your hubby ever has financial issues.

If he wanted to scam you, will it be 500K, don't you know he'll be looking for a way to get more?

I pray for that guy that he doesn't marry you cos you will make his life miserable if he ever has financial problems.



Funny thing is that most of y'all women are like this, always quick to collect everything possible but when it comes to giving it's a problem.

I hope you fall into wrong hands that will teach you a lesson of your life since you can't be supportive of your to be husband.

All the harshness was duly intended and I exercised restraint not to call you names.

tosyne2much:
I know this thread will soon be hijacked by team "that's why I don't give my money to guys"

nkwuocha:
[[s]quote author=thesuave10 post=60701739]


Dude you are fûcking daft. Have you even been listening to what I've been saying. The dude is wrong. I'm not blaming the woman about the issue of unpaid debts. It's not her fault and it's not the guy's fault either. Don't be a he goat Abeg. I don't give a flying fûck if it's business with OR without a romantic relationship. The guy has fûcked up and he can't meet up. Now you're the one who is being shallow by saying simply because he can't pay back the relationship should end. You ÎDIOT that is what shallow means. You didn't go deeper to even want to know his problem is. Now the guy is not picking her calls and I'm saying for the upteenth time that he is wrong by not doing that. The lady to is wrong by attempting to ruin her relationship because of the fact that he can't pick her calls . She clearly doesn't know the full details about the company or the company records. In business whether with your wife or anybody, the first you do Is to create a working relationship and trust must be involved. Now that things didn't go as planned so the next thing is to drop everything? The guy is running away from his issues and the lady also doesn't know how to handle crises. This you dimwit is in depth thinking. You're so shallow not to even see things from both sides. Your talking marriage like that is my point. It shows how poor you are in comprehension [/s]

You're indeed a knuckle head. Just dey carry empty skull up and down like person wey chop food wey them keep for T-junction.
You are just moving from pillar to post like nkpuru amu.I don't even understand your issue with the lady quitting the relationship.

You be donkey ooo.The lady doesn't know how to handle crisis. So calling her colleagues on his behalf is supposed to be what?Is that not part of creating a working relationship?Is testing all the time an avenue of creating lasting trust in a relationship E be like say your brain dey lick akamu. The lady is no longer comfortable with the scammer and she has got the right to quit the relationship,and yes!this is enough to quit a relationship that is obviously doomed to fail due to lack of communication on the guys part ,and desperation on the lady's.

One statement highlights your stupidity you brainless dog. It's enough to end the relationship because of lack of communication and desperation. That's like saying it's OK for you to end your life because you don't understand the world? You are an ÎMBECILE of monumental proportions. So ending the relationship is knowing how to handle crises? She has no background of the company and yet it's OK to end it like that? it shows you're a dog. Why do they call it testing then? . The guy is still replying her a text and said he'll pay back and a dog like you is talking nonsense. Sha I'm not surprised you can't think properly

sekem:


What you will do might depend on the type of person you are

But if I should advise you, I'll say learn to love yourself rather than looking for a woman to love you

You will be so disappointed if you choose to go that way

You may want to get married to a woman who will truly support you but I'll advise you never to count on that

On the way out of this high level of mistrust for women these days, listen to me, there's no way out

The system is now totally corrupted

The best you can do for yourself is to learn how to play the field

What do I mean by this?

Yes, women are always willing and ready to manipulate you, consciously and subliminally

Be on the look out for that at all times

Whenever she tries to goad you into doing what you don't want to do most especially with that real man of a thing; never give in

But you know the best thing you'll do for yourself?

Learn how to manipulate women

You'll be doing yourself a lot of service when you do that

supersystemsnig:

Jeez, i'll patiently chew on these again and again... without doubt, you're good

pocohantas:


Your worry is the team that'll hijack the thread.
If it were a thread on how a girl was killed by ritualist, you would be on FP typing long story. Now you don't know what to say.

How you guys here manage to be so hypocritical is beyond me.

sekem:


Don't only chew it

Make sure you digest it

sekem:


What you will do might depend on the type of person you are

But if I should advise you, I'll say learn to love yourself rather than looking for a woman to love you

You will be so disappointed if you choose to go that way

You may want to get married to a woman who will truly support you but I'll advise you never to count on that

On the way out of this high level of mistrust for women these days, listen to me, there's no way out

The system is now totally corrupted

The best you can do for yourself is to learn how to play the field

What do I mean by this?

Yes, women are always willing and ready to manipulate you, consciously and subliminally

Be on the look out for that at all times

Whenever she tries to goad you into doing what you don't want to do most especially with that real man of a thing; never give in

But you know the best thing you'll do for yourself?

Learn how to manipulate women

You'll be doing yourself a lot of service when you do that

thesuave10:


You need him to let you know, he doesn't think he should let you know cuz it might stress him out or get him disappointed. Both of you are making perfect sense. Now he doesn't tell you and that's a big problem and since he doesn't tell you, you start questioning his transparency based on Lil facts and you take rash decisions like calling the police him. Then the police investigates and finds out he really didn't have enough to pay you and now you feel bad cuz you've made a mistake. Trust me this is how it always ends. The male mind and female mind are different. Ideally the male should be the one stepping up and doing the right thing but in a situation where he fûcks up, the woman should try and do the right thing. The reason why males lead and must lead is that men put way more effort in understanding than women do

pocohantas:


Your worry is the team that'll hijack the thread.
If it were a thread on how a girl was killed by ritualist, you would be on FP typing long story. Now you don't know what to say.

How you guys here manage to be so hypocritical is beyond me.

Ninethmare:
You said he is your fiance and you guys are planning for marriage
you borrowed him some money to help in revitalising his company.
Now the question is have you asked him how business is moving? he maybe having some problems...
You are all after ur money not knowing that after ur marriage with him the company is also urs
.
.
Now see what you are going to do...
Stop talking about ur money for now and try to know how the business is going.
Build the love again
Focus on your marriage
.
After marriage then you can skin him alive if you want.

missyadorable:


I wonder oooo

The babe no wise..She exposed her financial position to the guy.what she doesn't know is that being a financially independent and comfortable lady in Nigeria is a major disadvantage.

Naija men can rant all they can on social media about hating dependent ladies and preferring independent ladies but in reality,its the opposite.
They actually prefer ladies who present themselves as broke,needy thus massaging their male ego as they provide.
once you come acting all so made and independent,they will see you as a meal ticket,chop you,run you down and use your money to enjoy with another girl who shows them that "needy,brokeness"....

As a lady,no matter how rich you are,pretend you are not.
Hide it,to avoid falling victim to scammers like this op's so called fiance.
If you have 2M in your account,give your man the impression that you have only 200k

supersystemsnig:


Hahaha. Thanks for the tips brov.

missyadorable:


Even many marriages these days are organised scam!
The lady is foolish! because of "I love you,i will marry you,and some sweet jargons that the man tells her which are all lies,she threw away 500K...

I am married but I can never give my husband 5K loan or dash,he will use my sweat to flex with other ladies outside.

I made my own money before I got married and still make my own money.

Everybody hold your pocket,abeg!

Pleasure and business don't mix!

sekem:


You're welcome

You'll be shocked when you realize that in most relationships, no matter how much they try to disguise or downplay it; the women are primarily out for what they can get from the relationship

It wouldn't be such a bad idea if you as a guy decide to do the same thing to them, would it?

Blackhawk01:

Asking me for money didn't get him stressed or disappointed? Better stress fall in him

An agreement is an agreement. Ion care if you're my mother, sister, husband or child. I didn't false words outta of your mouth. If there's anything that makes a man more attractive to me, it's taking responsibility for his actions. If at all there's gonna be a breach of any kind, tell me. How the fvck did I ever agree to date you when you think I can't handle the truth of any situation.

How am I supposed to do the right thing when he's ignoring my calls.

Blackhawk01:




Honestly, i don't know what to make of Tosin anymore. Men can do no wrong in his book

tosyne2much:
Shey you know when you're basing your judgment upon hearing one side of a story, you shouldn't view things from a narrow and limited worldview?

Bekeee:


She mentioned and I quote "since things went back to normal" in other words his biz is back to normal!
Why didn't he keep to his words of the weekly dividend then and why the change of attitude, doesn't call, avoid her calls etc these are the signs she saw and not necessarily after her money. After all, it's her money!

Explain what's your understanding of "things went back to normal" Cuz that's a very vague statement and for you to make a case on that statement is quite worrisome

saintade01:
Get your money back and Forget about the incoming marriage.

thesuave10:


One statement highlights your stupidity you brainless dog. It's enough to end the relationship because of lack of communication and desperation. That's like saying it's OK for you to end your life because you don't understand the world? You are an ÎMBECILE of monumental proportions. So ending the relationship is knowing how to handle crises? She has no background of the company and yet it's OK to end it like that? it shows you're a dog. Why do they call it testing then? . The guy is still replying her a text and said he'll pay back and a dog like you is talking nonsense. Sha I'm not surprised you can't think properly

nkwuocha:


Dogs are smart,I'm flattered!
You are a complete jelly fish!
You bastard from several fathers!!!
People like you are the cause of this desperation we see in women of today.Just take a look at what you're comparing, ARE YOU A MAD MAN?!YOU ARE INDEED MENTALLY DERANGED.
Get lost with the background of the company,you keep saying this Shiite over and over like a convulsive cretin. Fucccking bastard!How sure are you that the said guy will pay back?Are you the guy in question?You must be silly! The lady wants out,there's no trust.Why is it such a big deal.This boy dey craze!

Daeylar:


Let it just be a lady that did want the man did. Sister you will fear the comments that day, LMAO

We have seen something on this nairaland sha,

I'm hoping and praying for op that she is able to collect her money soon, her boyfriend apologizes and hopefully they also make up, settle and better their communication, I hope she comes back to give us update.