lekonso:
Oga husband there is nothing wrong in what your wife has done. I'm surprised you said you are RCCG and does not know what is sacrifice. For your information when Pastor Adeboye retired from University of Lagos, he collected his gratuity, the whole sum without touching a dime from it and God told him to divide the whole money into 3 parts and instructed him (Pastor Adeboye) to give the whole money to 3 different ministries, which he did. Look at what God has done in his life today. I warn you very seriously if you do anything to that your wife because of what she has done, you will see the anger of God. In any case i'm very sure you will come back to this platform to share the testimony of what God has done in the life of your wife. She does not need to tell you before she obeys God, so that you will not prevent her. If she has told you, you will not allow her to obey God.

Are you being sarcastic

coputa:
If you are really an RCCG member as you claimed and which I equally doubt,you should know that your church also practice the FIRST FRUIT offering,which is the sum total of all your income at the beginning of the Year.
How is your wife's actions different from that of your church.
Don't start this year by mocking the church(God).

Please read and understand. She sowed the seed before January first and it is not a first fruit. In fact, it is the last fruit of the year. She only told me yesterday

jaggedboi:

I am not God. I do not have the ultimate right to state categorically if her seed is null and void. Thanks for the correction

You're welcome. How about the message.

pocohantas:


I dare say, I am yet to see any happily married woman:
I mean one who loves, respects and listens to her husband, while he reciprocates, doing extreme things for pastors.

The most unhappy married Nigerian women are found in the church. They are the easiest to brainwash. They see things in their pastors that they wish to see in their husbands, they automatically give him the respect that should be given to their husbands. The pastors on their part are trained to listen, something most husbands don't do. So, she pours out her mind to him.

If they are not praying and sowing seeds against sidechics, it's for a child, against troublesome in-laws, for their husband's love, their husband/children's progress...etc.

They won't stop, a miracle must happen in this 2018.

I interestingly agree with you.

Pierohandsome:
Spiritual obedience is sensitive and personal. She acted based on the knowledge of ur spiritual level, decisions like that doesnt require any consultation frm third party especially if she knows the spiritual level of the person she is trying to confide with is low.

She did the right thing, be happy with Her and move on

May your wife treat you like that
Her salary is for the family not just her smart ass

timseye:


This is a big heresy, how can a wife acted in such a way without informing her husband. Remember when you get married, you have to carry your partner along in whatsoever you do. Even if your husband ask you not to sow the money you have to obey him and pray for God to open his eyes to see the reasons why you have to sow the seed. Obedience is better than sacrifice. How do you think that God will accept such a gift that was done in such a crooked way. They might even have needs in the family yet she sow seed without informing her head. She dishonoured her head.

Exactly!

If I were the husband, I will be very angry with her and she will hear an earful from me.
Ordinary say my customer owing me money November time, promising to pay by January. Began telling me stories that she has sowed all her December salary to Pastor and I should wait til February for January salary. Mehn I sparked!
Money have been waiting for patiently to solve some very pressing issues, she then said she has sowed it all.

If she were a kid? I would have beaten shege from her body until she run go meet pastor collect the money back! I don't have patience for stupidity.

Mehn she got an earful from me. I was like are there still dumbb women at this time and era?

Am a woman o but sorry I don't sow foolishly. Then open mouth for air, dey look.
Not my portion. My creator himself would not want to see me suffer that much.

Haba.

I really don't see any problem in what the wife did.

Perhaps, I've learnt from my parents' marriage. There are some decisions they take before informing the other and yet they're still happily married.

It's one month salary not one year...and no, this incident does not mean she will give her one year salary away.

OP, i think you should just let this incident go. It's nothing serious for you to post online.

postmann:




There was no direct or implied comparison between both churches in my post.

A simpler narrative would read thus; a man is the spiritual head of his home. A situation where a man and his wife worship at different churches is a fundamental marital error, which I place squarely at the table of the man being the head.

point taken! Please kindly show references where a husband is considered inadequate in his capacity as spiritual head of his home if his wife worships in a Bible believing church different from his?
And while you're at it, could you please explain how that narrative of yours couldn't be taken to mean some churches( the husband's being the head of the home) are better than others ( the wife's).

lawman88:
Happy new year Nairalanders,

My wife is very churchy and spiritual. I love her for that but she told me this morning that the spirit ministered to her to sow something huge to a reverend father, so she carried all her December salary and gave to a reverend father. I asked her why she didn't notify me before she undertook it and she said such instructions should be carried out without anybody's knowledge.

I'm not a catholic member, I'm RCCG. catholic members in the house, is that how your doctrine is? We are young couple and I wish we don't have any serious disagreement for now.

This is what the Bible says about this:

Numbers 30:10-13 New International Version (NIV)

“If a woman living with her husband makes a vow or
obligates herself by a pledge under oath and her husband
hears about it but says nothing to her and does not forbid
her, then all her vows or the pledges by which she obligated
herself will stand. But if her husband nullifies them when
he hears about them, then none of the vows or pledges that
came from her lips will stand. Her husband has nullified
them, and the LORD will release her.

You have the right to demand her to return the money or even confront the receiver.

However, you can let it slide for peace to prevail.

lawman88:
Happy new year Nairalanders,

My wife is very churchy and spiritual. I love her for that but she told me this morning that the spirit ministered to her to sow something huge to a reverend father, so she carried all her December salary and gave to a reverend father. I asked her why she didn't notify me before she undertook it and she said such instructions should be carried out without anybody's knowledge.

I'm not a catholic member, I'm RCCG. catholic members in the house, is that how your doctrine is? We are young couple and I wish we don't have any serious disagreement for now.

What she did was totally wrong. Ask your wife to read Numbers 30:1-8 for proper understanding of vow and sow. She should seek your consent before doing such

The present day Nigeria family depend on two income( salary)
Husband or wife shouldn't make any financial decision without the other partner
Lot of people here need to grow up

lawman88:
Happy new year Nairalanders,

My wife is very churchy and spiritual. I love her for that but she told me this morning that the spirit ministered to her to sow something huge to a reverend father, so she carried all her December salary and gave to a reverend father. I asked her why she didn't notify me before she undertook it and she said such instructions should be carried out without anybody's knowledge.

I'm not a catholic member, I'm RCCG. catholic members in the house, is that how your doctrine is? We are young couple and I wish we don't have any serious disagreement for now.

Then don't turn the issue into an argument. it's her salary after all & she's not complaining.
If she didn't mean well, she won't tell you about it at all.
Peace.

makydebbie:
See how singles with no knowledge about how marriage works are telling op to divorce his wife. Can you imagine the irony? So when he leaves his wife, what next? He should come for your sister's hand abi?

If that's how marriage work, I wonder how many couples we'll see.

Don't mind them. I felt tempted to give them some solid cusses but I restrained myself with great effort. This is a new year

internationalman:
And she's probably calling the pastor daddy too.
When I'm married; the day my wife calls her pastor daddy is d day she will b last seen in my house.

This is laughable.

Except you are not Yorubas, people old enough to be your parents or have strong influence over you are daddy and mummy..... so you see big daddy, daddy, daddy mi, daddy wa, daddy Kekere etc.

Infact, daddy mi and mummy mi i.e. my daddy/mummy was coined because of plenty daddies and mummies in the system.

Like pocahontas rightly said, the first step to not having a wife so fixed to the pastor is giving her peace.

lawman88:

Well, we talk alot. She is my best friend. I took her out to many places even this Christmas. Only her banking work keep her away from me during the day time on working days. I have lots of freedom where I'm working so I have lots of time for her

Then ask why she didn't tell you of the leading before dropping the money

Phi001:
I really don't see any problem in what the wife did.

Perhaps, I've learnt from my parents' marriage. There are some decisions they take before informing the other and yet they're still happily married.

It's one month salary not one year...and no, this incident does not mean she will give her one year salary away.

OP, i think you should just let this incident go. It's nothing serious for you to post online.

There is a problem if there was no problem the dude will not be here telling us
Marriage is a team
No partner should make any financial decision without the other 1/12 of her yearly income is gone

postmann:



Your first error is your inability to bring your wife under the canopy of your spiritual fortress where you're her first priest. Had you done that, she wouldn't be a Catholic and you an RCCG member.

Well, her character please me when we met even more than many girls in my church, so I don't see much need to persuade her to join my church. I told her reverend father that I will not force her to join my church after marriage........

Ishilove:

Don't mind them. I felt tempted to give them some solid cusses but I restrained myself with great effort. This is a new year

Well, since the woman has made her reverend the head of the family, she should marry the reverend instead.

Ladyhippolyta88:
It is not some how they are.

Lol.
Abi

Guy, you already have a matrimonial problem, why will you be in church A and your wife in Church B, you both can't jive easily together. Is either you join her to become a Catholic or she join you in your church, but I trust those Catholic girls, even Shekau cant force them to leave Catholic to other churches. I simply left my ex because she was hell bent at dyeing a Catholic.

oyb:


Well, since the woman has made her reverend the head of the family, she should marry the reverend instead.

To the carnal man, all things are carnal...

GoodFaith:


There is a problem if there was no problem the dude will not be here tell us
Marriage is a team
No partner should make any financial decision without the other 1/12 of her yearly income is gone

1/12th is gone, I agree...but the woman won't have made the decision if she thought they didn't have back up money.

I really don't see any problem unless the decision affects the family's upkeep...

Richy4:

I was surprised a lot of people saw nothing wrong with what she did.. as if marriage was not between the two of them..

Because religion is involved probably.
It's very wrong, took such a major decision without regard for her husband, couldn't put herself in his shoes. How will she feel if roles were reversed? She would probably be livid, Today it's all her salary she gave, what will she carry to give the reverend next time? Today her reason is because she wants kids what will be the reason next time? And because the holy spirit told her to? What will the spirit tell her next time?
She was very selfish in this case, acting like she is still single,

Something is really wrong, op feels there is no pressure from any side, so what is eating her up?, they need to talk, I feel he can be angry, very angry honestly, what she did is messed up, but I like the way he is calm, they really need to to talk to each other and listen to one another,

Assuming she has no saving, whose salary and income will she be depending on till the next pay package comes..?

Her husband?

Since they are a young couple, assuming the man got no house of his own and was planning to start doing a housing project with half of his income with the hope that the wife will contribute, that means the plan will not materialize because she has handed her pay to a priest..

I think they in a traditional sort of marriage where the husband takes care of bills and she takes care of the home, even though she works her money is not needed because the husband has enough and is happy to take care of her and everything concerning finances. From op's vibe, I don't think money is an issue,
Or he is just being really really calm.

pocohantas:


I dare say, I am yet to see any happily married woman:
I mean one who loves, respects and listens to her husband, while he reciprocates, doing extreme things for pastors.

The most unhappy married Nigerian women are found in the church. They are the easiest to brainwash. They see things in their pastors that they wish to see in their husbands, they automatically give him the respect that should be given to their husbands. The pastors on their part are trained to listen, something most husbands don't do. So, she pours out her mind to him.

If they are not praying and sowing seeds against sidechics, it's for a child, against troublesome in-laws, for their husband's love, their husband/children's progress...etc.

They won't stop, a miracle must happen in this 2018.

you're so smart and intelligent....believe when I say you've made the best comment all year already.......walahi I for like marry you if you're still not married

pocohantas:


I dare say, I am yet to see any happily married woman:
I mean one who loves, respects and listens to her husband, while he reciprocates, doing extreme things for pastors.

The most unhappy married Nigerian women are found in the church. They are the easiest to brainwash. They see things in their pastors that they wish to see in their husbands, they automatically give him the respect that should be given to their husbands. The pastors on their part are trained to listen, something most husbands don't do. So, she pours out her mind to him.

If they are not praying and sowing seeds against sidechics, it's for a child, against troublesome in-laws, for their husband's love, their husband/children's progress...etc.

They won't stop, a miracle must happen in this 2018.

Truer words have never been said.

nenergy:

I pray to have your kind of patience and love. Chai!

Ur own patience n love doesnt matter, they do what dey want to do, how dey want to do it. They av this nack of wearing ur patience down.



Op, that step she took, is just d beginning. Ur marriage is still young, cut it out! Or else, within 5yrs, u'll bring stories that touch. Start laying boundaries.


The prob is, u wont advise her not to take that step, u just wish to know abt it!

makydebbie:
See how singles with no knowledge about how marriage works are telling op to divorce his wife. Can you imagine the irony? So when he leaves his wife, what next? He should come for your sister's hand abi?

If that's how marriage work, I wonder how many couples we'll see.

God bless your understanding. You will leave long.

Sheunma:
point taken! Please kindly show references where a husband is considered inadequate in his capacity as spiritual head of his home if his wife worships in a Bible believing church different from his?
And while you're at it, could you please explain how that narrative of yours couldn't be taken to mean some churches( the husband's being the head of the home) are better than others ( the wife's).

The temptation to answer your question is strong, but stronger is my ability to identify and side-step you -- a greenhorn atheist.

A scriptural discuss with you is fruitless.

lawman88:
Happy new year Nairalanders,

My wife is very churchy and spiritual. I love her for that but she told me this morning that the spirit ministered to her to sow something huge to a reverend father, so she carried all her December salary and gave to a reverend father. I asked her why she didn't notify me before she undertook it and she said such instructions should be carried out without anybody's knowledge.

I'm not a catholic member, I'm RCCG. catholic members in the house, is that how your doctrine is? We are young couple and I wish we don't have any serious disagreement for now.

You better start having disagreement before she sow your certificates as a seed to the Church

Ishilove:

Don't mind them. I felt tempted to give them some solid cusses but I restrained myself with great effort. This is a new year

Bae, it's so annoying. Every small issue they'll say break up. Ahan!

collabo4me:


God bless your understanding. You will leave long.

Amen, and you too.