fhutson500:
Nlanders,

Good afternoon all, something happened of recent I thought I should make it known here. I work from home, cos my wife runs a daycare, though she's got two Nannies that work with her which means she gets to work at anytime she wants at times.

This fateful morning, I had gone to drop the kids @school and branched at the carwash to wash the car, on getting there, she called me that she needs to leave home to meet up the nanny and assist at the daycare cos the other nanny has not arrived, I said can you quickly make something for me to eat b4 u leave, she
said time has gone that she wont be able to do that, being a very understanding and considerate husband, I said she could leave, that I'll sort myself.

In fact she was so much in a rush that she had to leave our maid that follows her from home to work @ home cos the lady was still in the bathroom like she told me. It wasn't up to 10mins, maybe she forgot oo, she said there is traffic jam on the road, that it seems that fuel scarcity is looming again due to queue, asking me if that was the case, Instead of answering her question, I asked where she was going, because that wasn't the way to the daycare she claimed she was heading to. She said she wants to go and pick her internet modem she forgot @ fcmb bank. I was like, but you left due to the fact that you wanted to assist the only nanny with the kids @ daycare, how come modem is more important than that or the food I begged you to make b4 u left, she said well I just have to go there now before her modem vanishes, I said no P.

At that time, I was back home and was really hungry, am the type that makes food, but the hustle in January was hella much, the motive of having to do anything was greatly paralytic, I take care of all the bills, so I understand what am talking about, body nor be fire wood. So i called her later on to ask if she can come home to quickly make the food, work place to home is like 5 mins drive, she said she's been stuck in traffic that she would need to head back to the creche since she didn't go there at first, I was like no P.

10 mins later, I called to ask her something, she apparently was in a noisy environment, I was like, aren't u back at the daycare, she was like NO, I quickly branched at the market to buy something, in which Market wasn't even far from home, like 2 mins, at that moment, I was so angry, so I flared up, I told her 'but why are u doing this", all along the reason u left the house has not been met to the detriment of the hunger am going through now, I was like u know what don't bother, will sort myself, and she was like no P.

However, she had left her wedding band on the room table, though we both agreed that whenever she forgets her ring, she would have to come back home to pick it, so I quickly used the ring as opportunity to trick her home, I was like come and pick ur ring, u have forgotten it again, she was like no oo, she cant, I was like have u forgotten our agreement, I said just come home and pick it. 4 mins later, she bashed in, started yelling, I am sure its because of trust u have enforced me to come home and pick the ring, blah blah blah, at the worms in my stomach were doing takwando training at the moment, I just kept quiet, she tried to abusively hold my head acting like she wanted to pet me, I withdrew, next thing, she just hissed and left, saying I am not even picking the ring, you can do your worse. From that day, I have decided not to eat her food, 2nd reason I am posting this is regarding this thread below:

https://www.nairaland.com/1307880/not-eating-wife-food-punishment

Is my situation legitimate enough to deny her food? Cos it seems a lot of people are against refusal of wifey food no matter the situation, but i feel the situation here is different. Plus she has been remorseless about the situation, and 7 years already into this union, we have been battling the issue of her responsibility on food from day 1, old problem that I feel should have expired, so we can work on new probs. Brothers and sisters, your 10kobo is needed.

All this burahaha because she refused to cook? Why can't you cook yourself or employ a chef? What about if your wife forgot her capabilities and abilities to cook? Would you not eat?

Ring or not, person wey go do go still do..... Abi you wan tell us say after marriage, you never chop outside?

Second base jare.......

Ladyhippolyta88:
Your problem Mr man I spoke my mind and that is my reality if it is paining you so much don't pray to marry my type of woman because they are out there and I would not pray to marry your type of man.REALITY,REALITY.

what amuses me most about u ladies on this platform is that,its only on this nairaland that u form feminist,....where as in truth you dare not perform wat u preach with ur spouse,..well kontunu leading the meek ones to the gate of no return...goodluck with ur FANTASIA

Ayiibobo:
what amuses me most about u ladies on this platform is that,its only on this nairaland that u form feminist,....where as in truth you dare not perform wat u preach with ur spouse,..well kontunu leading the meek ones to the gate of no return...goodluck with ur FANTASIA

You don't know me in reality so you have no right to judge leave that for the people who know me.How do I also know that you are not a house husband coming to form boss online.So keep your analysis to yourself in reality I am highly opinionated and I don't need to prove myself to you.

Wait oh, the initial plan was to rush down to the school, then later was caught up with traffic jam (apparently because that wasn't the way to the school) and then the issue of going to the bank to get her modem came up-who called her that she left her modem behind at the bank and which day was that, and is the bank manager with her line, and how did they know it was hers? Again she came back and refused to go out with her wedding band. Bruh, sit ur wife down and have a long chat with her.

.

Ladyhippolyta88:
You don't know me in reality so you have no right to judge leave that for the people who know me.How do I also know that you are not a house husband coming to form boss online.So keep your analysis to yourself in reality I am highly opinionated and I don't need to prove myself to you.

if you had kept ur fantasy to urself,I wouldn't have bothered about ur post in d 1st place,.....plus I am not interested in u proving anything to me,cos I already know your type from ur words,. I'm concerned about the wife material babes reading your feminist opinions

The OP is at fault here. Did anybody not notice were he stated he works from home and still yet he can't make breakfast for him? Even the amount of times he called the poor woman is rather annoying

Ayiibobo:
if you had kept ur fantasy to urself,I wouldn't have bothered about ur post in d 1st place,.....plus I am not interested in u proving anything to me,cos I already know your type from ur words,. I'm concerned about the wife material babes reading your feminist opinions

It was your choice to quote me or not,so mind your business it is my world my REALITY.Whether you know one person type that you have met does not equate to knowing my type by my words.You don't need to be concerned it is their lives not yours.Goodnight.

AjiAmu:

Don't worry..by the time you clock 40 in your parents house, you'l beg for a man who doesn't even have food to cook sef

So what if she’s 40 and unmarried?
And who says she has has to still be living in her parents house at that age? Retardedd post

Dafreeguy:


leave am..na when she don reach 35 and still single, her eye go open

what’s giving you people the idea that a single lady is worse off than a married one?

A single lady who is living her dream life is better than one who is married to an insecure (practically handicapped) man who can’t even make his own breakfast. You people and your useless egos

Seahawk:
what’s giving you people the idea that a single lady is worse off than a married one?

A single lady who is living her dream life is better than one who is married to an insecure (practically handicapped) man who can’t even make his own breakfast. You people and your useless egos

Excuse me are u 35, single, female, living alone? Its just a question o

IForgotMyLoginD:
My honest opinion? I mean no disrespect sir. And Lord knows. I’ll just say the first thing that came to my mind when reading this.


Pls WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO CREATE AN ISSUE in your marriage? If you are Christian, kindly read 1Cor 13:4-7. If you’re not Christian, pardon my giving you a Bible verse but bottom line is, LOVE doesn’t make issues out of nothing, LOVE is Considerate. LOVE doesn’t look for faults.

If you were really hungry, a quick meal would have sufficed. And between your home and the crèche, there could have been a new development that gave your wife time to quickly pick up her modem (which she might need for work) before rushing down.

Let’s always give each other the benefit of a doubt.

All these are not enough to reject your wife’s food. Just saying. Sounds childish to me (no offense intended pls).

Mwah, Mwah, Mwahhhh!!!

MhizzAJ:
God knows i can't get married to any man that doesn't know how to cook and do some basic chores

Then you will stay single for a long time

Pls settle your differences and stop seeking counsel from people who are yet to be married because you can only give what you have,cooking may not be her hobby but you know she's good in other things,and may be you don't have kids yet,be more patient when children comes nobody will beg her to cook for her children because trust children now they will cry for for their right,women are fragile handle her like one,and you will enjoy your marriage more

msylva2147:
mere looking at you one can easily say you can't cook.

Have you seen me before?

Some men sha,you want to spoil the good thing you have with your wife..
Please start eating her food..there's no need for this misbehaviour
Don't be petty...and pls..give your wife small space..she's not your puppet.. She's a intelligent human being that can make prompt decisions and act on those decisions. Respect beget respect. A word is enough for the wise.
Meanwhile...there are ways to avoid this kind of wahala...
She is a woman..she should use her sense more ...



My two kobo

MhizzAJ:
God knows i can't get married to any man that doesn't know how to cook and do some basic chores

My sister, this is horrifying, how in this day and age a grown man is unable to prepare a simple meal for himself is beyond me. And what is most disgusting is the pride with which he displays his lack of basic culinary skill. Sad.

[color=#770077][/color]

Ladyhippolyta88:
I thought the Op said he could cook.This is childish you think you are punishing her it is yourself you are doing.You are suspecting her of cheating it also means you are a suspect.I agree with Mhizz AJ I can't marry a man who is not domestic to assist himself or the family.

what if she was cheating for real....i understand that when a guy starts doing frequent calls, then he is most of the time suspecting something....the dude should complete his story

Oyindidi:
You will come back begging for my food.

Is your food ready?

gnykelly:
even in marriage the most important thing is trust.


you doubting her moves is not wrong. cos of her inconsistency of her whereabouts.

you need to man up. and start restricting some of her actions.

you can start making it mandatory for to cook for you before leaving home.

and give her time limit that she must return by evening. take control and don't give her any say but don't sophocate or over do it.

Lol...what an advice. When you behave this way, are you her husband or her jailer? Please where do men like you come from?

Where do women see all these kinda petty men to marry?

Op you sound like a nag. Seems like you married a quiet wife, if for the reasons you stated above you refuse my food?

You will come and beg to eat it later. You’re punishing yourself not her. Better grow up.

I pity some men saying can’t you cook can’t you do this and that because of food as if they can play with their own stomach and most people following this topic self never reach maturity stage... oga op... Channel your energy on your online jobs leave your wife to do her thing... she’s just trying to be herself and ontop that you gas let her know it’s her duty to make your meals and no more excuses.. speak like a man I don’t means scream,also i think you’re bored for trying to get her home at all cost. What if you stay and work abroad and your family in nija? Calm down oo no use your own hand Cuz gbege

keepingmum:
What a nag of a man!!! After saying you ll sort yourself with food you now start making calls because of food, ring and sex,??
Where do women see this type of men? Such a petty and childish manchild
Whenever hunger catch you, you' ll beg your wife for food because there's no man born of a woman that ll say he's punishing me by not eating my food....if you like buy food from outside or get a babe to cook for you....when they use poison or jazz to reset YOUR destiny its YOUR problem alone and MY life will go on

You will live long! Nothing more for me to add to this opinion of yours.

fhutson500:
Nlanders,

Good afternoon all, something happened of recent I thought I should make it known here. I work from home, cos my wife runs a daycare, though she's got two Nannies that work with her which means she gets to work at anytime she wants at times.

This fateful morning, I had gone to drop the kids @school and branched at the carwash to wash the car, on getting there, she called me that she needs to leave home to meet up the nanny and assist at the daycare cos the other nanny has not arrived, I said can you quickly make something for me to eat b4 u leave, she
said time has gone that she wont be able to do that, being a very understanding and considerate husband, I said she could leave, that I'll sort myself.

In fact she was so much in a rush that she had to leave our maid that follows her from home to work @ home cos the lady was still in the bathroom like she told me. It wasn't up to 10mins, maybe she forgot oo, she said there is traffic jam on the road, that it seems that fuel scarcity is looming again due to queue, asking me if that was the case, Instead of answering her question, I asked where she was going, because that wasn't the way to the daycare she claimed she was heading to. She said she wants to go and pick her internet modem she forgot @ fcmb bank. I was like, but you left due to the fact that you wanted to assist the only nanny with the kids @ daycare, how come modem is more important than that or the food I begged you to make b4 u left, she said well I just have to go there now before her modem vanishes, I said no P.

At that time, I was back home and was really hungry, am the type that makes food, but the hustle in January was hella much, the motive of having to do anything was greatly paralytic, I take care of all the bills, so I understand what am talking about, body nor be fire wood. So i called her later on to ask if she can come home to quickly make the food, work place to home is like 5 mins drive, she said she's been stuck in traffic that she would need to head back to the creche since she didn't go there at first, I was like no P.

10 mins later, I called to ask her something, she apparently was in a noisy environment, I was like, aren't u back at the daycare, she was like NO, I quickly branched at the market to buy something, in which Market wasn't even far from home, like 2 mins, at that moment, I was so angry, so I flared up, I told her 'but why are u doing this", all along the reason u left the house has not been met to the detriment of the hunger am going through now, I was like u know what don't bother, will sort myself, and she was like no P.

However, she had left her wedding band on the room table, though we both agreed that whenever she forgets her ring, she would have to come back home to pick it, so I quickly used the ring as opportunity to trick her home, I was like come and pick ur ring, u have forgotten it again, she was like no oo, she cant, I was like have u forgotten our agreement, I said just come home and pick it. 4 mins later, she bashed in, started yelling, I am sure its because of trust u have enforced me to come home and pick the ring, blah blah blah, at the worms in my stomach were doing takwando training at the moment, I just kept quiet, she tried to abusively hold my head acting like she wanted to pet me, I withdrew, next thing, she just hissed and left, saying I am not even picking the ring, you can do your worse. From that day, I have decided not to eat her food, 2nd reason I am posting this is regarding this thread below:

https://www.nairaland.com/1307880/not-eating-wife-food-punishment

Is my situation legitimate enough to deny her food? Cos it seems a lot of people are against refusal of wifey food no matter the situation, but i feel the situation here is different. Plus she has been remorseless about the situation, and 7 years already into this union, we have been battling the issue of her responsibility on food from day 1, old problem that I feel should have expired, so we can work on new probs. Brothers and sisters, your 10kobo is needed.

Guy, you are all shades of wrong. I'll have to take your wife's side on this one

Hello! As a married man u don't have to reject your wife's food o. If you're sure you love her, its an issue both of u should sit and talk over. After all na u still dey put the money down, so why punish yourself and your marriage?

I am like , NO P

Oyindidi:
You will come back begging for my food.

if na you dey cook the food, i go use vex plus annoyance chop the food and clean mouth!!


...meanwhile still won't talk to you!

7yrs
And she still has to come home anytime she forgets her ring?

Ur trust level is zero.

Seahawk:

So what if she’s 40 and unmarried?
And who says she has has to still be living in her parents house at that age? Retardedd post

Don't mind those with closed up mindsets, they feel an unmarried woman has nothing else to live for in life.

I dont even know where to start from, but I'll make myself clear and very detailed. I understand if insult is being thrown here and there because alot of people will never understand the kind of wife I have. In marriage, both parties need to sacrifice alot to keep the marriage going and maintain it to the core. When it comes to the sacrifices, I have done everything I can to hold it down, I am not a bad husband, neither am I a nagging type.

People, I know what am doing when I talked about paying all the bills, I knew alot will call for my head, what I was trying to insinuate was that, its not like I have a million in my account, but people trust me, I try alot, I work alot people, just to take care of my children and my wife, it takes alot of enery, I am even shedding tears right now, cos if you people know me, u know how good I am of a person to carry this family along, In all ramification, I have, and always been taking care of my responsibility, so I expected her to do her when it is proper. I am a man that stands on my word, blv me u peeps, if her reason for leaving the house wasnt enough for me to say, you can go, I was 100% sure she would have made the food b4 she left, but because she wanted to go assist the nanny,this issue became a problem when all of a sudden she branched somewhere else, so where is the importance of going to the daycare when that little time u had to face the road to go pick something can get me food on the table? I just feel both parties just have to take care of their responsibilities. This is not the first time I am sorting myself, I sort myself when I have the strength to do that, and not when I cant. In marriage, trust sis built and maintained from openess and transparency, if your wife tells u she's rushing to the daycare, and she suddenly have faced another location? There has been trust issues right from day 1, because I have seen things that would make 90% of men consider her as a cheating wife, but because I want to keep my home and focus my mind on providing for the family, I dont really keep tabs on that. My own is, nobody can really understand what goes on in peoples home, I am 100% sure if you guys know, majority of the comments here would have gone the other way round. I like to communicate and resolve issues, but at this point, I am almost fed up, because whatever issue we thrash, this same woman will go back to the same vomit, so it makes resolving issue most of the time hard for me.

Bros, you are such a busy body husband o!
U really don't have to be such a pain in the backside over breakfast. How do u expect your wife to come back from the office just to make u breakfast, after all she has explained to you about her hectic day.

Besides, what kinda man drags his wife to Nairaland?

I am sure you are not a bad person, but please bro, don't bring your family issues here.

You are pissed cos your wife said she was heading to the daycare but then went to get her modem, right? Don't you think her explanation is reasonable?

Please sit down with her and talk things over. Don't be such a piece of work by refusing to eat her food. I mean, how do reject food made with your money? Lol

All the best bro.