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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son (38364 Views)
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Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by Nobody: 12:12am On Apr 14, 2018 |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by Nobody: 12:13am On Apr 14, 2018 |
Instead of beating, dialogue might even work some magic. Some children will reason with you if you address them like adults even though they're just toddlers. Beating might send the wrong signal like you hated him and so don't give him that impression because he might not even understand what he's getting flogged for. 5 Likes |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by onatisi(m): 12:14am On Apr 14, 2018 |
PurestBoy:Baba baba baba How many times did I call you ,write this down today YOUR SON IS A PACESETTER AND A LEADER just leave him alone and be thanking God for giving you such a wonderful boy. Without meeting him ,I have fallen in love with him already 10 Likes 1 Share |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by Nobody: 12:14am On Apr 14, 2018 |
Lirqur: Everything isn't about spanking 1 Like |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by Celepope: 12:15am On Apr 14, 2018 |
Those features of his are that of early signs of ADHD.Go see a psychiatrist and possible early administration of Ritalin.Try to reduce his sugar intake and also reduce the time he spends watching TV 2 Likes |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by alsudaes1(m): 12:15am On Apr 14, 2018 |
lonelydora:It's like Majority of them these days behave this way, I have same at home 3 Likes |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by nduchucks: 12:16am On Apr 14, 2018 |
@OP, here is the litmus test I use. Ask yourself this question: Have I ever seen a teenager behave in the manner your 4yr old does? If your answer is No, then your son will likely grow out of that behavior. Please do not damage the boy by telling him that being himself is wrong. Let him be for now, he is only 4yrs old for Pete's sake. 2 Likes |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by OmoAlata1(f): 12:16am On Apr 14, 2018 |
He is not autistic. There is nothing in that writeup that screams autism. He has ADHD and needs to be formally diagnosed so he can get on medication. ststyreal: 2 Likes |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by Offpoint: 12:18am On Apr 14, 2018 |
PurestBoy:I'm not a dad, but he weee to be my kid.... I'll drug 24/7... I'll only undrug when he was to eat...... sleeping pills 247 |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by IamaNigerianGuy(m): 12:21am On Apr 14, 2018 |
Children will be children. The human brain is the fastest growing organ in the body and consumes 20% of its blood supply and 40% of its energy. Young children have to deal with the consequences of a rapidly functioning supercomputer that is not only receiving input but increasing in capacity at the same time. Many people talking about ADHD here. ADHD is over diagnosed even in the west and one key fact you have mentioned totally rules it out for your kid: he is quiet when watching his favorite cartoons. Children want to be mentally stimulated. One of the early signs of high intelligence is extraordinary curiosity and energy. The worst thing you can ever do is tie down a curious child to a boring task. If cartoons distract him, give him cartoons for 10 hours a day if need be. Buy him computer games, story books and coloring books. There are hundreds in the market. Teach him to read and write so he can occupy himself. When he is older, offer him treats in exchange for peace and quiet. There needs to be an outlet for his fantastic mental energy and if you do not provide one, it will be channeled into disruption. Fighting with you is an indication that he needs attention and something to preoccupy his mind. An occupied child will not struggle with you for the remote control. You want to limit sugar on general principles of obesity and nutrition and not because it causes any kind of mental effects. Give the child what normal children eat. This is the age at which white people take advantage and begin the process of seeking and nurturing genius in kids. Music lessons, art, chess, maths, drawing, reading etc. Search for his passions. My niece was the same way and I taught her the multiplication table from 2 to 9 before she turned 5. If you suppress their natural curiosity and energy at that age, you will be committing a crime against humanity. Stop beating the child. There is nothing wrong with him. 68 Likes 13 Shares |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by nonix22(m): 12:24am On Apr 14, 2018 |
NwaAmaikpe:This is a serious and interesting issue to follow up with; on the other news, I used to love that drink die back in the UK |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by GrammarCheck: 12:25am On Apr 14, 2018 |
alsudaes1: My 2 year old girl is like 10 boys. Her favourite cartoon character is not Elsa, or Sophia, or Minnie. It is Catboy! Sometimes I just clear all dangerous objects and let her wear herself out. She holds her elder ones to random. They are scared of her. If you upset her, she will look for the nearest object and fling at you. If you spank her, she will design your body with nails. I noticed only books, crayon and nursery rhymes hold her attention for an hour so I've surrounded her with colouring books and picture books. I also bought her a tab to watch nursery rhymes so I can have peace . It is well 23 Likes |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by chineduemmao: 12:25am On Apr 14, 2018 |
ststyreal:therapist 4 dis our 9ja? |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by GrammarCheck: 12:26am On Apr 14, 2018 |
IamaNigerianGuy: I had posted before reading your post. You are spot on. |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by nonix22(m): 12:27am On Apr 14, 2018 |
This is the making of another creative wee kid. But e no dey easy at first. May God see you thru |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by Kaxmytex(m): 12:30am On Apr 14, 2018 |
Are you sure they are not on a codeine diet? If they are, you cant stop them from being online o, let dem see a therapist straight up |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by Adaowerri111: 12:33am On Apr 14, 2018 |
IamaNigerianGuy: |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by sleek82(m): 12:33am On Apr 14, 2018 |
IamaNigerianGuy:God bless you for this piece. PLEASE! PLEASE!! PLEASE!!! Your boy doesn't suffer from anything until a certified psychiatrist or a specialist checks him out and even at that, with all you said about him, he is just displaying a typical hyperactivity of a toddler....if he keeps quiet to watch his favorite cartoon, trust me, he is fine! He doesn't have ADHD! At 4 yrs, it is too early to say he has any mental disorder abeg! If you still want him checked out, it's fine but you are just being a paranoid parent. Your boy is fine!!! 4 Likes |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by classc25(f): 12:35am On Apr 14, 2018 |
Please my niece acts the same, that is hyperactive her speech is not clear and yes she tip toes and has a bit of cross eyes. Does it means any thing please . She is 7 years. 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by Jsucre(m): 12:35am On Apr 14, 2018 |
in this case.
try to ignore his worst actions
but compensate the good things he does
with time, the compensation will change him. because if you beat him till tomorrow , he will get worse also check him for attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by AlhajiAbdul: 12:35am On Apr 14, 2018 |
I think your son has ADHD just like me ADHD is no stigma.....Infact, I think that my ADHD has made me a far more intelligent person Even though I find it difficult to maintain a long attention span, I am able to grasp a lot of information in a short space of time Also, nothing escapes my memory......I am 28 but I can give you a graphic description of several events that occurred when I was a child ADHD kids are extremely intelligent Nurture that boy and he will go places. 1 Like |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by Jsucre(m): 12:39am On Apr 14, 2018 |
classc25: she need medical attention |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by Sterope(f): 12:44am On Apr 14, 2018 |
You don't outgrow ADHD. He needs to consult profeasionals! ProfEinstein: 2 Likes |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by Jethrolite(m): 12:49am On Apr 14, 2018 |
PurestBoy:This is the reason I do not want a male child. I just need 2 girls. That aside, tell your wife to stop beating him, likewise you. If he has his own room then research grounding(time out) and grounding blackmail. Whenever a crime is committed, simply ground him. This is the time to instill it in him, soon your shouting or beating won't matter but you can use grounding until he is 18 or leaves for university. Please research it properly and modify to suit your situation. When he is serving a time out punishment and starts crying or simply wants to stop serving the punishment do not release him, you have to show discipline and enforce it without shouting or beating the child. 20 to 60 minutes time out served in full will break the boy in no time. Within weeks or months, even days, all you have to do is blackmail him with it and he will behave. From the level of stubbornness he is already showing, I feel you did not tell the entire story. You and your wife may be the prime agents making that boy a brat. Evaluate the situation and yourselves with your wife honestly and proceed on enforcing resolutions made. |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by blakky97(m): 12:51am On Apr 14, 2018 |
Manage him till he gets to primary six, then take him to nigeria military school in zaria. Soldiers will make him calm 6 Likes |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by MrBigiman: 12:59am On Apr 14, 2018 |
ADHD is what he has. He has to seek psychiatrist help if it doesn't wear out. |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by rezzy: 12:59am On Apr 14, 2018 |
I thought it was only my son. OK, we plenty fa |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by Nobody: 1:34am On Apr 14, 2018 |
The shouting and spanking doesnt work without communication and real relationship. In fact it worsens the behaviour if dts all ur doing. You should watch videos of supernanny or 3day nanny on youtube and thank me later. Trust me their methods work. Its even changed violent kids dt curse and pull knives on their parents while throwing tantrums. At least ur kid is not dt wild. Some of their methods are 1. Set clear rules for the kids, write it down, show it to them as the new house rules, then paste it where they can see. Then enforce immediately wt a specific punishment when they disobey it. Dont just shout. Dts not discipline. There has to be a repercussion. And be CONSISTENT. Very important. If ur not there ur wife must be consistent. Also b4 administering the punishment tell them why theyre being punished. After the punishment is served tell him to tell u what he did wrong and to apologize to you for d wrong behaviour, and then hug him and tell him u love him. 2. Have alone playtime wt ur kids. At least for 30mins in a day where ur laughing together and playing interactively. Watching tv or video games together doesnt count. U and mum can rotate throughout the week. Sometimes they act up for lack of loving attention. 3. Set up a reward system for good behaviour. This is so dt ur communication wt him also includes praise, and ur not just barking orders all day. It also shows and teaches them the kind of behaviour to imbibe. You can google 'reward systems for kids.' Ps - there are many age appropriate punishments - isolating them with a time out or naughty corner. Not beatings. 5 Likes |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by Nobody: 1:40am On Apr 14, 2018 |
PurestBoy: Most likely ADHD I was born witht he same thing, prepare for a life time of hyperactivity, looses interest quickly in stuff, might have trouble sleeping later in life, mood swings, overly enthusiastic and passionate about everything. But can be managed. 2 Likes |
Re: I Need Help For My 4-Year-Old Son by Nobody: 1:48am On Apr 14, 2018 |
Let us start by cutting his sugar intake Don't listen when people say you must buy all those juice boxes, chocolate, biscuit for your kids and if you don't you are suffering them. Just don't listen to them. Natural fruits will do I used to have this neighbor, her voice is on a constant high...her boys are extremely hyper...imagine actually tying them to a chair to keep them seated for homework....just saying, I don't think you have anything to worry about Just practise a menacing look that you know will work Or my all time solution was getting a needle-less syringe plastic and putting toothpick where the needle is supposed to be....oh my...once they start I just ask calmly who feels like having an injection and start acting like a serious nurse...they sit sharp sharp 4 Likes |
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