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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice (29177 Views)
I Cheated-my Marriage Is Falling Apart / POF: My Marriage Is About To Be Ruined Becaus Of A Secret I Kept From My Husband / My Marriage Is At The Brink Of Collapse Help Me (2) (3) (4)
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My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by Texrec: 7:04pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
Good evening Friends, please I need your urgent advice and on how to manage this complicated situation. I do supply of diesel and other products to a company here in Port Harcourt. They always paid within one or two weeks.After my mother's burial last year ,I didn't have enough cash to execute the supply they gave me because i sponsored the burial as the first son. So I borrowed some cash from a friend. That was the beginning of my wahala. The company's manager and some workers defrauded the owner that hardly lives in Nigeria. So my payment was delayed and I explained everything to my friend. That I even invested all my little savings to that supply and that I'm even finding it difficult to feed my family. Around February this year I went to Cross River state to buy chippings for someone and I spent about two days there because of truck problems. So my phone battery was down and even my wife was not able to reach me. To my greatest surprise, this my friend went to my church and I told my pastor that defrauded him.That I have even packed out of my house and switched off my phone. Meanwhile he knows my place and he didn't even bother to go and ask my wife where I went to since my number wasn't going through. When the pastor told me things he said, I couldn't believe it (infact I was shocked). I called my friend and he initially denied meeting my pastor. The pastor scheduled a meeting for us to meet and sort things out but the guy refused to show up. I have tried to sell my own share of my inheritance to pay him his money but I have not been able to see a serious buyer due to the location of the property. The problem is that this guy is calling everybody that I know and even going to Facebook to contact my friends that I defrauded him. I have asked him to give me time but he said I must come to somewhere outside port Harcourt town with my wife before he will negotiate anything with me. I cannot allow anybody to ridicule my marriage because of debt. I told him I won't involve my wife in that kind of arrangement. He calls me every morning and night and sometimes i just feel like ignoring his calls because i know it's same talk everytime.The company is currently not operating but the chairman has agreed to pay me soon. How do I handle this mess because this guy is ruining my reputation and it's tearing my marriage apart. If you have experienced this before, please I need your advice urgently because I'm going insane. 12 Likes |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by IamD18: 7:13pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
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Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by Prognose: 7:24pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
Na Warri man? He wants to abduct your wife and hold her as surety until you pay. Suggestion : Involve the police or a lawyer. Let them draft up a memorandum of understanding for both of you saying how much you are owing and how soon you will pay back. That should put to rest any dubious thing he has in mind and also make your hustle more serious in paying him back his money. Suggestion: You have been doing good business before, I assume you have a bank account. Take a soft loan from the bank and pay your friend back. You can now pay the bank back monthly. Pick one. Solve this matter quickly cos it seems your friend is getting desperate. 155 Likes 6 Shares |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by Stycon(m): 7:24pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
I have not experienced this before but I think you may wanna consider doing credit refinancing - get another loan with better terms to finance this particular loan 13 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by blackpanthar: 7:27pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
KINDLY INVOLVE POLICE... Also be very vigilant because the guy must be FETISH to want u and your wife to COME OUTSIDE PH TO AN UNKNOWN PLACE..... also you have to cut ties with him offline and online... even change your number. Your WIFE still trusts you and that is all you need... FORGET ABOUT PEOPLE and THEIR OPINIONS... when u get the MONEY FORWARD IT VIA BANK TRANSFER TO HIM.... never look back... YOUR FAMILY SAFETY COMES FIRST. In this life.. friends can be worse than the devil. so stay SHARP Texrec: 28 Likes |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by Texrec: 7:48pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
blackpanthar:Thank you Sir, I really appreciate. 6 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by Texrec: 7:50pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
Prognose:I appreciate your advice sir 3 Likes |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by Texrec: 7:51pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
Stycon:I have tried to use my property to get a loan but my wife is against the idea. 2 Likes |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by Stycon(m): 8:00pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
Texrec: There are a lot of quick loans of up to 3m out there that doesn't require collateral. E.g. Renmoney or what are they called sef ![]() Plus the property you wanna sell could be used as collateral 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by Firgemachar: 10:22pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
Ok |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by asdfjklhaha(f): 10:22pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
H 1 Like |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by oyetunder(m): 10:22pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
May God help you to settle this satanic debt. 7 Likes |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by tizzdi(m): 10:23pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
Sorry but how is your marriage tested here cus i dont get 51 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by veacea: 10:23pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
Get the police and a lawyer involved ASAP 1 Like |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by marttol: 10:23pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
, |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by castrol180(m): 10:23pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
that your friend is a desperate fùcker who want to have a stint of your wife's veejay 9 Likes |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by Nobody: 10:26pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
Plz Bro, I don't see the nexus of ur marriage with this matter? ![]() 8 Likes |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by Handsomebeing(m): 10:26pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
That’s a lot to go thru but not sure it’s up to what I went to which I am still recovering from. I went from leaving lagos to start a lucrative business in Delta state. To cut the long story short, I had to run back to lagos due to security challenges I faced with my family living in warri. It was very tough as I lost almost everything. Sold what was left to rent a house in Lagos, at one point sold my car and started sharing the other car with my wife. Started struggling financially for the first time since my marriage. The obvious started, wife started giving attitude and misbehaving. Her mom too would bring all sorts of s**t too through her daughter. I ignored for long until it got to a point I couldn’t take it anymore. Before then, I made sure I did everything I could do as a man to take care of my family and pay school fees including using the car as a cab on Saturday and Sunday evening, started playing soccer betting which also helped a great deal as I was lucky enough to win an amount that paid off my debt of over 2m. All these she didn’t know. I reacted to wives disrespect first my getting myself out of my financial mess.. secondly, I was mad at her that I even walked my mother Inlaw out. Gave her an option to follow her mom which she didn’t take. My advise, leave your wife alone until you’re out of your mess. Face her when you’re out of it and you’ll earn your respect back when she sees improvements. Women are wired to love comfort. Some just take it too far. 69 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by Nobody: 10:27pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
Stycon: renmomey will give you a loan of 3m without collateral ![]() 3 Likes |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by Lomprico2: 10:27pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
Texrec: Stop calling the fucker your friend cos he is not! And don't meet him anywhere out skirt town, d guy fit don plan abduction on u or ur wife. And lastly get a loan from somewhere else to pay him, even if na to borrow from ur pastor (afterall dem dey get money ![]() 13 Likes |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by gbaskiboy: 10:28pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
Well until I hear from other guy I can have something to say. But if this is true your friend is immature maybe he's looking for something in place of his loan, I would advice you to get loan elsewhere to settle him and get the dunce outta your life |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by Hector09(m): 10:28pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
This is called d test of man hood, so many men ve face more serious problem than this, just man up |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by itzjorju(m): 10:30pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
Your friend want to be bleeping your wife till you pay up |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by Apina(m): 10:30pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
If that's the case, look for whatever means necessary without involving your family and pay back cos peace of mind is worth more than any material wealth. 3 Likes |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by gazilion: 10:33pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
How Much are you owing him pls? The advice given to you by @Prognose is Good. Follow it. 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by stano2(m): 10:33pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
Ok |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by zombieTRACKER: 10:35pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
Am sure you voted Buhari Now you are financially helpless |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by Nobody: 10:36pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
Its really unpleasant situation to be in, I really understand your situation, first step is 1. Try and get his account details 2. Try and reach out to probably his elder brother or sister if he has one, or a good substitute is one of you guys clique, explain your situation and be sincere about the readiness to pay back 3. Intensify all means to get the money 4. Pay back, give him a call and retriate your sincere apologies 5. Never involve your wife in any of the situation. 6. Freinds with all intimate with few. I pray God see you through this temporary phase..Experience is the best teacher and am sure it will guide you in your future dealings. 3 Likes |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by franktolk(m): 10:37pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
Texrec: Hello sir , you are owing and necessity demands you pay your creditors. I don't like it when people like you start giving frivolous excuses when its time to pay back what you borrowed. Your action has potentially spoilt your relationship with your friend and definitely blocked future opportunities. Next time don't borrow beyond your capacity. 13 Likes |
Re: My Marriage Is Being Tested. I Need Your Advice by Nwaohafia1: 10:37pm On Apr 17, 2018 |
Texrec: Why are you scared of involving Police or lawyer? Haven't you seen those stickers on cars that says "wetin lawyers dey do sef?". Cut ties with your friend for now, he is desperate and planning something bad for you. Why put a location outside PH? The earlier you involve police...the better for you. 5 Likes 1 Share |
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