Texrec, owing money in Nigeria is not a criminal offence but a civil matter. Go to police or use lawyer as earlier advised if you're sure your friend is safe to deal with in that manner else hold your peace and hope you get paid soon and severe relations with that guy, I'm surprised you still call him your friend.

Prognose:
Na Warri man? He wants to abduct your wife and hold her as surety until you pay.

You de crase? You hear say warri men de take people wife abi too much kponyo water you de drink don knock your brain?

Get police and your lawyer involved with immediate effect, also tell your wife to be vigilant because your so called friend get plan for her. Make sure you always lock your gate/door, she should be careful of strange number calling and not to go out alone in the night.

My suggestion sir.

Texrec:
Good evening Friends, please I need your urgent advice and on how to manage this complicated situation.

I do supply of diesel and other products to a company here in Port Harcourt. They always paid within one or two weeks.After my mother's burial last year ,I didn't have enough cash to execute the supply they gave me because i sponsored the burial as the first son. So I borrowed some cash from a friend.

That was the beginning of my wahala. The company's manager and some workers defrauded the owner that hardly lives in Nigeria. So my payment was delayed and I explained everything to my friend. That I even invested all my little savings to that supply and that I'm even finding it difficult to feed my family.

Around February this year I went to Cross River state to buy chippings for someone and I spent about two days there because of truck problems. So my phone battery was down and even my wife was not able to reach me. To my greatest surprise, this my friend went to my church and I told my pastor that defrauded him.That I have even packed out of my house and switched off my phone. Meanwhile he knows my place and he didn't even bother to go and ask my wife where I went to since my number wasn't going through. When the pastor told me things he said, I couldn't believe it (infact I was shocked). I called my friend and he initially denied meeting my pastor.

The pastor scheduled a meeting for us to meet and sort things out but the guy refused to show up. I have tried to sell my own share of my inheritance to pay him his money but I have not been able to see a serious buyer due to the location of the property.

The problem is that this guy is calling everybody that I know and even going to Facebook to contact my friends that I defrauded him. I have asked him to give me time but he said I must come to somewhere outside port Harcourt town with my wife before he will negotiate anything with me. I cannot allow anybody to ridicule my marriage because of debt. I told him I won't involve my wife in that kind of arrangement. He calls me every morning and night and sometimes i just feel like ignoring his calls because i know it's same talk everytime.The company is currently not operating but the chairman has agreed to pay me soon. How do I handle this mess because this guy is ruining my reputation and it's tearing my marriage apart. If you have experienced this before, please I need your advice urgently because I'm going insane.

Texrec:
Good evening Friends, please I need your urgent advice and on how to manage this complicated situation.

I do supply of diesel and other products to a company here in Port Harcourt. They always paid within one or two weeks.After my mother's burial last year ,I didn't have enough cash to execute the supply they gave me because i sponsored the burial as the first son. So I borrowed some cash from a friend.

That was the beginning of my wahala. The company's manager and some workers defrauded the owner that hardly lives in Nigeria. So my payment was delayed and I explained everything to my friend. That I even invested all my little savings to that supply and that I'm even finding it difficult to feed my family.

Around February this year I went to Cross River state to buy chippings for someone and I spent about two days there because of truck problems. So my phone battery was down and even my wife was not able to reach me. To my greatest surprise, this my friend went to my church and I told my pastor that defrauded him.That I have even packed out of my house and switched off my phone. Meanwhile he knows my place and he didn't even bother to go and ask my wife where I went to since my number wasn't going through. When the pastor told me things he said, I couldn't believe it (infact I was shocked). I called my friend and he initially denied meeting my pastor.

The pastor scheduled a meeting for us to meet and sort things out but the guy refused to show up. I have tried to sell my own share of my inheritance to pay him his money but I have not been able to see a serious buyer due to the location of the property.

The problem is that this guy is calling everybody that I know and even going to Facebook to contact my friends that I defrauded him. I have asked him to give me time but he said I must come to somewhere outside port Harcourt town with my wife before he will negotiate anything with me. I cannot allow anybody to ridicule my marriage because of debt. I told him I won't involve my wife in that kind of arrangement. He calls me every morning and night and sometimes i just feel like ignoring his calls because i know it's same talk everytime.The company is currently not operating but the chairman has agreed to pay me soon. How do I handle this mess because this guy is ruining my reputation and it's tearing my marriage apart. If you have experienced this before, please I need your advice urgently because I'm going insane.

DON'T EVER EVER MAKE A MISTAKE OF OBTAINING LOAN TO PAY A DEBT !!!

I saw some people advising you to do that, it's jumping from frying pan into fire.

On the matter, what has happened has happened, you can only hope to get out of the situation with some dignity at end of the day. You can only arrange a physical meeting with your friends in presence of a trusted third party, appeal to him, and show him evidences of your delayed payment, and give him some assurance he will get him money complete. Make sure you tape it on your phone. If need be, draw up some written agreement with copies for everybody (including witnesses) and sign. It is prudent to exclude your wife from such physical meetings.

Afterwards, go on and live your life, and work towards paying him back.

Never let the pressure make you do something stupid. You are owing already, so he must learn to get patient while you get money to pay him. If he can't, he may as well go to police station ( - no fear, it's a civil case and police can't do you shiit), or report to whoever he wants to, only make sure you're making genuine and progressive efforts to get him paid.

Good luck

#IHaveBeenThereBefore

Listen my dear, I have been in such debt bondage, even now, I haven't paid the money. There was a time pressure was so much that I nearly went insane.

The truth is, you have to calm down and know he won't do anything to you. Always pick his calls even if ten times a day, and always plead with him each time, and politely ask him if he can take any of your properties in place of the money since u can't pay it for now. Don't dodge him and don't be rude to him. He did u a great favour, so don't see him as a bad person. All those gragra is just to put pressure on u and nothing else, believe me, he won't do anything. Forget about your ego, let him tarnish it so far as its about a debt, everyone has been in such debt bondage.

The worst he can do is to arrest u, but then, any authority u are taking to will do nothing except asking u when u will pay the money.

Believe me honestly, u will be fine. But never u see him as a bad person, and don't tell I'll of him in his back.

Plead plead plead with him always and ask him to take u and sell u to get his money back......

cheers......

Texrec:

I appreciate your advice sir

In addition, try as much as possible not to go or spend above your limit next time, pressure will come but no matter what never give up to it. It's never a good idea borrowing money to spend on activity that wouldn't yield income.

You could have gone for a low key burial forget what people will say, which would have saved you from all these unnecessary pressures.

OChimex:
Listen my dear, I have been in such debt bondage, even now, I haven't paid the money. There was a time pressure was so much that I nearly went insane.

The truth is, you have to calm down and know he won't do anything to you. Always pick his calls even if ten times a day, and always plead with him each time, and politely ask him if he can take any of your properties in place of the money since u can't pay it for now. Don't dodge him and don't be rude to him. He did u a great favour, so don't see him as a bad person. All those gragra is just to put pressure on u and nothing else, believe me, he won't do anything. Forget about your ego, let him tarnish it so far as its about a debt, everyone has been in such debt bondage.

The worst he can do is to arrest u, but then, any authority u are taking to will do nothing except asking u when u will pay the money.

Believe me honestly, u will be fine. But never u see him as a bad person, and don't tell I'll of him in his back.

Plead plead plead with him always and ask him to take u and sell u to get his money back......

cheers......

OP, take this gentleman's advice.

I want to apologise for my offensive posts especially you gap-teeth people I'm thory guyths thumtimes I'm veryth stupidth

Chloe88:


renmomey will give you a loan of 3m without collateral

I wonder, forget about renmoney.

Texrec:
Good evening Friends, please I need your urgent advice and on how to manage this complicated situation.

I do supply of diesel and other products to a company here in Port Harcourt. They always paid within one or two weeks.After my mother's burial last year ,I didn't have enough cash to execute the supply they gave me because i sponsored the burial as the first son. So I borrowed some cash from a friend.

That was the beginning of my wahala. The company's manager and some workers defrauded the owner that hardly lives in Nigeria. So my payment was delayed and I explained everything to my friend. That I even invested all my little savings to that supply and that I'm even finding it difficult to feed my family.

Around February this year I went to Cross River state to buy chippings for someone and I spent about two days there because of truck problems. So my phone battery was down and even my wife was not able to reach me. To my greatest surprise, this my friend went to my church and I told my pastor that defrauded him.That I have even packed out of my house and switched off my phone. Meanwhile he knows my place and he didn't even bother to go and ask my wife where I went to since my number wasn't going through. When the pastor told me things he said, I couldn't believe it (infact I was shocked). I called my friend and he initially denied meeting my pastor.

The pastor scheduled a meeting for us to meet and sort things out but the guy refused to show up. I have tried to sell my own share of my inheritance to pay him his money but I have not been able to see a serious buyer due to the location of the property.

The problem is that this guy is calling everybody that I know and even going to Facebook to contact my friends that I defrauded him. I have asked him to give me time but he said I must come to somewhere outside port Harcourt town with my wife before he will negotiate anything with me. I cannot allow anybody to ridicule my marriage because of debt. I told him I won't involve my wife in that kind of arrangement. He calls me every morning and night and sometimes i just feel like ignoring his calls because i know it's same talk everytime.The company is currently not operating but the chairman has agreed to pay me soon. How do I handle this mess because this guy is ruining my reputation and it's tearing my marriage apart. If you have experienced this before, please I need your advice urgently because I'm going insane.

Go to God in prayers, nothing is too big fr God, put your trust in him and you will off set that debt in no time...

Mistake

Stop calling him a friend

Patience man, silence sometimes is very good, being non chalant and developing leather tough skin mostly in times of problems and situations like yours is always beneficial. I will not advice you to sell your inheritance because you want to pay a debt. If it is authentic that you used the money for business and that you have not been payed and also, you hope to be paid soon, pls turn deaf ears to the rantings of that man...... He is not your friend

Speaking from experience

I understand your situation...but did you ever care to ask what your friend is going through because you haven't repaid him? What do you expect him to think when you collected his money and disappeared?.....disappear ...not seen nor can't be contacted?. .. can't be contacted because your phone battery died?..is your phone a Tesla?...cannot be recharged in Cross River? ....couldn't you borrow a phone to call him? I guess you forgot to say how much you paid back so far. ...N50?
You behave like a swindler...so how do you expect to be treated? The guy needs his cash...not excuses. Start paying him back....before it's too late.

Texrec:
Good evening Friends, please I need your urgent advice and on how to manage this complicated situation.

I do supply of diesel and other products to a company here in Port Harcourt. They always paid within one or two weeks.After my mother's burial last year ,I didn't have enough cash to execute the supply they gave me because i sponsored the burial as the first son. So I borrowed some cash from a friend.

That was the beginning of my wahala. The company's manager and some workers defrauded the owner that hardly lives in Nigeria. So my payment was delayed and I explained everything to my friend. That I even invested all my little savings to that supply and that I'm even finding it difficult to feed my family.

Around February this year I went to Cross River state to buy chippings for someone and I spent about two days there because of truck problems. So my phone battery was down and even my wife was not able to reach me. To my greatest surprise, this my friend went to my church and I told my pastor that defrauded him.That I have even packed out of my house and switched off my phone. Meanwhile he knows my place and he didn't even bother to go and ask my wife where I went to since my number wasn't going through. When the pastor told me things he said, I couldn't believe it (infact I was shocked). I called my friend and he initially denied meeting my pastor.

The pastor scheduled a meeting for us to meet and sort things out but the guy refused to show up. I have tried to sell my own share of my inheritance to pay him his money but I have not been able to see a serious buyer due to the location of the property.

The problem is that this guy is calling everybody that I know and even going to Facebook to contact my friends that I defrauded him. I have asked him to give me time but he said I must come to somewhere outside port Harcourt town with my wife before he will negotiate anything with me. I cannot allow anybody to ridicule my marriage because of debt. I told him I won't involve my wife in that kind of arrangement. He calls me every morning and night and sometimes i just feel like ignoring his calls because i know it's same talk everytime.The company is currently not operating but the chairman has agreed to pay me soon. How do I handle this mess because this guy is ruining my reputation and it's tearing my marriage apart. If you have experienced this before, please I need your advice urgently because I'm going insane.

Church folks are supposed to be the best kind bt sadly they are even worse tho not all bt most are no better. The pastor has intervened bt he still calls u a fraud. Try to look for sm1 else to help u with funds to settle the restless guy cos he won't accept it stories anymore which is normal bt unfair for sm1 who knows u as a fellow brother and ur circumstances. Its well

im surprised how you still call such person your friend. A friend who is aware of your current predicament should at least show some understanding once you show commitment to pay back.

Mind those you call friends!

Jethrolite:


You de crase? You hear say warri men de take people wife abi too much kponyo water you de drink don knock your brain?

Area!
I maintain bros!
Na from experience I be dey talk bros, no change am for me abeg

OChimex:
Listen my dear, I have been in such debt bondage, even now, I haven't paid the money. There was a time pressure was so much that I nearly went insane.

The truth is, you have to calm down and know he won't do anything to you. Always pick his calls even if ten times a day, and always plead with him each time, and politely ask him if he can take any of your properties in place of the money since u can't pay it for now. Don't dodge him and don't be rude to him. He did u a great favour, so don't see him as a bad person. All those gragra is just to put pressure on u and nothing else, believe me, he won't do anything. Forget about your ego, let him tarnish it so far as its about a debt, everyone has been in such debt bondage.

The worst he can do is to arrest u, but then, any authority u are taking to will do nothing except asking u when u will pay the money.

Believe me honestly, u will be fine. But never u see him as a bad person, and don't tell I'll of him in his back.

Plead plead plead with him always and ask him to take u and sell u to get his money back......

cheers......

OP, this is the best advise here.

I suggest you take it

Nwaohafia1:


Why are you scared of involving Police or lawyer? Haven't you seen those stickers on cars that says "wetin lawyers dey do sef?".

Cut ties with your friend for now, he is desperate and planning something bad for you. Why put a location outside PH? The earlier you involve police...the better for you.

one major reason i rarely lend big money to friends. Imagine if your friend didnt give you that loan...by now you will be saying he is a bad friend. After lending you the money, they are still advising you to cut ties with him. DO YOU BOTHER TO KNOW WHAT THE FRIEND IS PASSING THROUGH COS OF THE MONEY? What if the money belonged to his place of work too and his job is on the line? I hate people that borrow money and start giving you stories....we all have stories to tell. If i were you op, i will do everything possible to pay back the loan asap and apologise. The guy didnt offend you....you are the one who offended him. Why do you think he should understand? Would you have understood if he refused lending you that money? Please....this is not right. I am not saying bad things dont happen....but your wife is even against you DOING SOME THINGS TO PAY BACK THIS LOAN AND YOU ARE BLAMING YOUR FRIEND. Meaning you are protecting yourself while you expect your friend to understand. All these people asking you to take loan, do you think bank will understand if you dont pay back. Meet your friend and negotiate a pay back with apology. God will only answer your prayers when you put yourself in other peoples shoes

[Offer him your property as to transfer the ownershipto him IF did you get that I mean IF the cost of the property covers his money or if it's more than his money ask him to add the difference to it and you both part ways but this can only be best archive in the presence pf police and lawyer as to the level at which you are ready to pay in the eyes of both police and the lawyer .

Mphiphh b][/b]

Texrec:
Good evening Friends, please I need your urgent advice and on how to manage this complicated situation.

I do supply of diesel and other products to a company here in Port Harcourt. They always paid within one or two weeks.After my mother's burial last year ,I didn't have enough cash to execute the supply they gave me because i sponsored the burial as the first son. So I borrowed some cash from a friend.

That was the beginning of my wahala. The company's manager and some workers defrauded the owner that hardly lives in Nigeria. So my payment was delayed and I explained everything to my friend. That I even invested all my little savings to that supply and that I'm even finding it difficult to feed my family.

Around February this year I went to Cross River state to buy chippings for someone and I spent about two days there because of truck problems. So my phone battery was down and even my wife was not able to reach me. To my greatest surprise, this my friend went to my church and I told my pastor that defrauded him.That I have even packed out of my house and switched off my phone. Meanwhile he knows my place and he didn't even bother to go and ask my wife where I went to since my number wasn't going through. When the pastor told me things he said, I couldn't believe it (infact I was shocked). I called my friend and he initially denied meeting my pastor.

The pastor scheduled a meeting for us to meet and sort things out but the guy refused to show up. I have tried to sell my own share of my inheritance to pay him his money but I have not been able to see a serious buyer due to the location of the property.

The problem is that this guy is calling everybody that I know and even going to Facebook to contact my friends that I defrauded him. I have asked him to give me time but he said I must come to somewhere outside port Harcourt town with my wife before he will negotiate anything with me. I cannot allow anybody to ridicule my marriage because of debt. I told him I won't involve my wife in that kind of arrangement. He calls me every morning and night and sometimes i just feel like ignoring his calls because i know it's same talk everytime.The company is currently not operating but the chairman has agreed to pay me soon. How do I handle this mess because this guy is ruining my reputation and it's tearing my marriage apart. If you have experienced this before, please I need your advice urgently because I'm going insane.

ekmike:
im surprised how you still call such person your friend. A friend who is aware of your current predicament should at least show some understanding once you show commitment to pay back.

Mind those you call friends!

keep shut. People like you will lend somebody 20k and will go haywire if they cant pay back. So the friend is the bad person while the op that refused to pay back the money is the good person. THE BEGINNING OF OP PROBLEM WAS USING HIS BUSINESS MONEY TO FINANCE BURIAL. This is so wrong. You dont even know how the friend got the money...maybe his own businesd money and you are here saying thrash, making the friend to look bad. Africans and their evil mentality. You used your business money to do burial and you refused to pay a friend who gave you his own business money back....and people are still advising you to cut ties with such friend. Switch position.....will you be quiet if you were the friend?

lets all stop being sentimental and judgemental here. my man, pay ur friend what u owe him, go out of ur way and pay him his money, take a loan, borrow, sell anything, but pay him his money. he already proved his worth as ur friend by being there for u wen u needed that loan. stop tryin to paint him black now because he is desperately in need of his money. pay him his money cos he has needs and family too to take care of. its people like u that this proverb applies to, "it is not the same mouth that a man uses to beg for a loan that he uses to pay back that loan". An uncle of mine did ds same tin to me and wen i started askin for my money back, his wife took it upon herself to slander me to others because i asked for money i loaned to her husband

You should be more worried about the safety of your wife than his loan. He has plans.

You can borrow from elsewhere to pay him off. How much are you owing him?

Afamed:

In addition, try as much as possible not to go or spend above your limit next time, pressure will come but no matter what never give up to it. It's never a good idea borrowing money to spend on activity that wouldn't yield income.

You could have gone for a low key burial forget what people will say, which would have saved you from all these unnecessary pressures.

Abi o

Afamed:

In addition, try as much as possible not to go or spend above your limit next time, pressure will come but no matter what never give up to it. It's never a good idea borrowing money to spend on activity that wouldn't yield income.

You could have gone for a low key burial forget what people will say, which would have saved you from all these unnecessary pressures.

Abi o
Despite the resentments, I still feel the friend isnt doing any wrong. Times are difficult, so getting someone to loan money is hard on its own. Many won't want to do it. So, he is in his right to demand his money. You probably chased him when asking, so its not fair to let him feel bad to collect his money back.

Originalsly:
I understand your situation...but did you ever care to ask what your friend is going through because you haven't repaid him? What do you expect him to think when you collected his money and disappeared?.....disappear ...not seen nor can't be contacted?. .. can't be contacted because your phone battery died?..is your phone a Tesla?...cannot be recharged in Cross River? ....couldn't you borrow a phone to call him? I guess you forgot to say how much you paid back so far. ...N50?
You behave like a swindler...so how do you expect to be treated? The guy needs his cash...not excuses. Start paying him back....before it's too late.

Help me tell him o. Op is not caring whether the guy also has some critical pressures he had/has and still decided to lend him the money.
Despite the OP's situation, you don't ignore calls when you owe someone money, because you ll make the person feel stupid for lending in the first place. Only swindlers do that.

helpee:
one major reason i rarely lend big money to friends. Imagine if your friend didnt give you that loan...by now you will be saying he is a bad friend. After lending you the money, they are still advising you to cut ties with him. DO YOU BOTHER TO KNOW WHAT THE FRIEND IS PASSING THROUGH COS OF THE MONEY? What if the money belonged to his place of work too and his job is on the line? I hate people that borrow money and start giving you stories....we all have stories to tell. If i were you op, i will do everything possible to pay back the loan asap and apologise. The guy didnt offend you....you are the one who offended him. Why do you think he should understand? Would you have understood if he refused lending you that money? Please....this is not right. I am not saying bad things dont happen....but your wife is even against you DOING SOME THINGS TO PAY BACK THIS LOAN AND YOU ARE BLAMING YOUR FRIEND. Meaning you are protecting yourself while you expect your friend to understand. All these people asking you to take loan, do you think bank will understand if you dont pay back. Meet your friend and negotiate a pay back with apology. God will only answer your prayers when you put yourself in other peoples shoes

Thought I was the only onse seeing it this way. You can't fail to payback money protect your interests and expect the friend to understand.

OP is the kind of person who makes genuine concerned lenders to hold back. Can't imagine someone was there for you to give you a loan, you are automatically expecting him to understand now he needs it. Like others have said. The problem originated when you went beyond your means to finance a burial. You can't eat your cake and have your friend's cake too. Stop seeing him as the bad person, he also has his pressing needs

dont involve ur wife no matter what.

Texrec:
Good evening Friends, please I need your urgent advice and on how to manage this complicated situation.

I do supply of diesel and other products to a company here in Port Harcourt. They always paid within one or two weeks.After my mother's burial last year ,I didn't have enough cash to execute the supply they gave me because i sponsored the burial as the first son. So I borrowed some cash from a friend.

That was the beginning of my wahala. The company's manager and some workers defrauded the owner that hardly lives in Nigeria. So my payment was delayed and I explained everything to my friend. That I even invested all my little savings to that supply and that I'm even finding it difficult to feed my family.

Around February this year I went to Cross River state to buy chippings for someone and I spent about two days there because of truck problems. So my phone battery was down and even my wife was not able to reach me. To my greatest surprise, this my friend went to my church and I told my pastor that defrauded him.That I have even packed out of my house and switched off my phone. Meanwhile he knows my place and he didn't even bother to go and ask my wife where I went to since my number wasn't going through. When the pastor told me things he said, I couldn't believe it (infact I was shocked). I called my friend and he initially denied meeting my pastor.

The pastor scheduled a meeting for us to meet and sort things out but the guy refused to show up. I have tried to sell my own share of my inheritance to pay him his money but I have not been able to see a serious buyer due to the location of the property.

The problem is that this guy is calling everybody that I know and even going to Facebook to contact my friends that I defrauded him. I have asked him to give me time but he said I must come to somewhere outside port Harcourt town with my wife before he will negotiate anything with me. I cannot allow anybody to ridicule my marriage because of debt. I told him I won't involve my wife in that kind of arrangement. He calls me every morning and night and sometimes i just feel like ignoring his calls because i know it's same talk everytime.The company is currently not operating but the chairman has agreed to pay me soon. How do I handle this mess because this guy is ruining my reputation and it's tearing my marriage apart. If you have experienced this before, please I need your advice urgently because I'm going insane.

Report him to the police for harassment. This is bullshit. Let the police intermediate the issue and then write an undertaken when you intend to pay him. The police will take 10% of the money after you paid. That way you punish him for trying to damage your reputation.

All because of burial. Na y i like muslims

The best thing to do is take the case to court, or else that man will mess you up, and make you wife turn her back on you.

Never ever borrow money from poor people!