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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home (91315 Views)
My Wife's Ex-Boyfriend Is About To Ruin My Marriage / Wife Trying To Ruin My Career Within A Few Months Of Arriving Abroad / "My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home" The True Story (2) (3) (4)
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Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by Arobake: 12:08am On Jul 15, 2018 |
�� Saintmary: |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by Arobake: 12:09am On Jul 15, 2018 |
Thank you. Saintmary: 1 Like |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by Saintmary(f): 12:09am On Jul 15, 2018 |
YorubaEmir:The husband built his own house in the name of his parents, how does that spell trust for the wife, are you saying one sided trust can sustain a marriage? 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by tiredoflife(m): 12:11am On Jul 15, 2018 |
HRHQueenPhil: Really kneel down Wonders shall never end Best she should do is either put it in the kid's name or let him go Abi u no born for am Let him go 5 Likes |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by Kutebyatso(m): 12:11am On Jul 15, 2018 |
We learned everyday |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by tunize(m): 12:12am On Jul 15, 2018 |
Seriously i really want to understand something. The house in question was it a collective effort from the both of you or from you alone?. In any case i'll advice you change the name to Mr and Mrs whatever cos if you ever change it to solely his name trust me u might be shocked. |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by LyfeJennings(m): 12:14am On Jul 15, 2018 |
HEseesall: Ur husband is mad 5 Likes |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by que4: 12:15am On Jul 15, 2018 |
I grew increasingly irritated the longer I read your message. You are married to a child. He wanted to kick you AND the kids out. Where did he think you would have gone? Now he is insisting you transfer the property solely to him? We have a stupid culture here that suppresses women in marriages. I'm all for marital bloods and harmony but if you were my sis, I would come over and help him park his bags. A man that will kick his ENTIRELY family out is not worth breaking a nail over. Please note my reaction is based solely on your side of the story. There is your side. His side. The truth. 7 Likes |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by Nobody: 12:16am On Jul 15, 2018 |
adubiay:Finally!!! Someone with an iota of sense. We all know that most times in Nigeria that it is men that spend most on the family expenses. In fact let me paint a better scenario of what is happening here. Husband and wife have a joint savings(possibly and probably the husband is even putting down way more because he earns more). Let's say husbands puts down 6 million as the head of the family and wife puts down 2 million. Who brings up the business idea?Possibly the husband or maybe the wife. Now they do the business and then make 3 million naira in profit. Note that the husband is still the one primarily spending on the family. Now the husband runs into financial crises and he also needs to help his family. He has also been the one taking care of the wife's family and paying rent and children school fees. So, because of this many expenses he can't embark on buying the land right now. He does what he has to do and spends his own agreed part of the money on his parents and family expenses. The wife doesnt agree with him spending so much on his parents (though she has not mentioned how much he has been spending on her own parents as a good in law and also living expenses like rent etc) The wife uses her own "part" (agreed part) of the interest from the investment in buying the land. Husband does not mind. After all, it is one family and one love. Husband keeps investing in the building project till its complete. because he believes Shebi it is family property. But Mrs owns the land and bought it in her name. Sneaky woman. Now they have an argument and out of annoyance husband tells her to leave only to discover that Mrs has sneakily had the entire property in her name all along. Husband is furious and feels cheated and betrayed. Who wouldn't be? Now Mrs is here on Nairaland asking if what she did was fair. You yourself do you think it is?? That is why I'm a supporter of sharing everything in marriage both interests and expenses based on how much each person has put in to the extent possible. Madam you know what to do. The name on the property shouldn't have been only in your name in the first place because it's a joint investment. You only solely paid for the land. 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by Sexyolori(f): 12:17am On Jul 15, 2018 |
don't make the mistake of changing the house to his name o. his recent actions just shows the extent he can go... 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by Arobake: 12:18am On Jul 15, 2018 |
Exactly. You aren't wrong at all. LewsTherin: |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by Olabestonic001(m): 12:18am On Jul 15, 2018 |
Pataricatering: That's just the heat of the moment. She has not really appease the man for disappointing him. She came here purposely because the man is seeking a transfer. She's scared! She knows what to do. And that man seriously needs wisdom! |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by cococandy(f): 12:18am On Jul 15, 2018 |
CSTR1005: Fundamental differences. It will probably never happen. Unless the post is about food. And that’s a maybe |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by Saintmary(f): 12:20am On Jul 15, 2018 |
HEseesall:They are manipulating you!!! Don't fall for it. They would sit by and watch you gamble with the future of your children so they can be happy. They sat by and watched their son chase you out of your own house. The ball is in your court, think of your children first!!! 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by sseunth(m): 12:20am On Jul 15, 2018 |
How come the op's husband don't know about the document since |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by cococandy(f): 12:22am On Jul 15, 2018 |
sassysure: Another on the way? ![]() |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by Saintmary(f): 12:24am On Jul 15, 2018 |
12inches1:You have a vivid imagination. 1 Like |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by histemple: 12:25am On Jul 15, 2018 |
LewsTherin: The only reason I won't be blaming you is simply because----you chose to and are reacting based entirely on what she submitted. Having handled numerous family law cases, I can see the flaws in her submission and it's not difficult when you listen more to what she is not saying than what she chose to say. With due respect to her, she hasn't told us exactly what transpired. However, let me draw your attention to likely possibilities which may also be close to her husband's version----supposing we get that. 1. The business was done with both of them contributing money together not as partners (two different people coming together for the purposes of a business venture) but as a family unit with a specific target----building a house. So, the total money realized belongs to the family as husband and wife. Nobody therefore has a separate share. 2. What this woman is referring to 'his own share for his family' was money both of them agreed to spend the way it was spent. I am sure you noticed when she said ""I had no problems with that". So it was expended on mutual consent. They made "so much" money than expected such that they could build the house and attend to other needs. The money was never shared in reality. 3. This man believed all along as "they" (you must gave observed also when she said they built the house together) were building the house that the document was probably in his name as the man of the family. 4. This woman knew she was wrong to have used only her name for a family property and so, she shielded the document away from the man. There is a huge possibility that she was more available than her husband to supervise the project and she used the advantage to manipulate the process. I understand the man's anger sufficiently and I can tell you that this man has trusted his family all along until he realized this shocking development. The man is feeling betrayed and I can tell you that this family CAN'T be the same again. The foregoing notwithstanding, my advice to this woman is to NEVER change the document to ONLY the man's name. In fact that is even wrong in the first place. The property belongs to both of them (the family) as long as it was built during the period the are legally husband and wife, irrespective of who brought the money. Lastly, it's a painful fact that this marriage has ended. They may or may not go the way of divorce but truly there is no marriage between them aside the marriage certificate. They are already divorced and are only still together solely because of their children. Notice when the woman said "we have kids together". Although I am making my submission based on her story and my observations as I haven't heard from the man for a balanced view. But if this man truly told her to "pack out of HIS house" then he is absolutely irresponsible and dangerously ignorant, no matter the provocation. The house (in a marriage) belongs to both of them equally. So, this woman should begin to prepare herself to be able to live without the man because that is an inevitable reality-----sooner or later but definitely. 1 Like |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by adubiay: 12:26am On Jul 15, 2018 |
HEseesall: @op if it was ur own parents that was sick and needed money to be flown abroad, it means you never took your husband parents has ur own, your husband mind and head was occupied with his parents sickness, he had an agreement with you to buy land so that you guys can build it together, yet you went ahead to buy it in ur own name alone, selfishness. He trusted you, that's why he never bother to ask for the documents , and u also hid it from him all tru the process of building because you want to owns the house alone yet you went ahead to buy it in ur own name alone, selfishness. You are already planning for divorce, that's why u did what u did, and the man is ready to grant you your wish, why coming here to make us think ur husband is wicked , no man in this circumstance will be happy with you. You messed up big time. Ask for forgiveness or you loose your man. If you like listen to all this single children talking trash here. In a year time, you will be tired leaving in the house alone 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by cococandy(f): 12:27am On Jul 15, 2018 |
Go and sit down. divinelove: 1 Like |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by histemple: 12:31am On Jul 15, 2018 |
12inches1: I agree with you totally. |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by Nobody: 12:32am On Jul 15, 2018 |
adubiay:Don't mind her. Greed and selfishness is evident in what she has posted. You think it's everyone on Nairaland that is Indomie generation and doesn't understand the full scope of what is being posted? So if it was her own parents she wouldn't treat them abi? |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by Nobody: 12:33am On Jul 15, 2018 |
. |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by Nobody: 12:33am On Jul 15, 2018 |
Eketem: Help me ask them. After they start shouting that men are trash but they are the main enablers of the men's atrocious behaviour. 4 Likes |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by TonyeBarcanista(m): 12:39am On Jul 15, 2018 |
HEseesall:Having gone through this thread this is what I can deduce: 1. You and Your husband did business. (You failed to say many percent much each person contributed to the business and the sharing percentage.) 2. Your husband's dad had ailment and some family issues, he used his own "share" (according to you) to take care of his family's pressing needs, which you FULLY agreed with him. (You failed to say that your husband has been also taking Care of your family. You also failed to say how much he gave your family from his alleged share) 3. You used your own "share" to buy a land property and your husband added his money to build it to a house. 4. You made the property in YOUR NAME without informing your husband, how much is a land? How much does it cost to build a house on a land? (Without informing him? Isn't this treachery?) 5. On a heated argument he asked you to leave (which he might not have meant) only for you to tell him that the house is in your name not his. Meanwhile, he's the one working hard to taking care of the family and his money built the house. 6. You expect him to be happy? My Dear, if I were your husband I'll move out of the house and rent a smaller apartment without even asking you to change the name to mine. Keep the house to yourself. I put it to you that you are concealing the truth I am 600% certain that his own version will be different! 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by histemple: 12:40am On Jul 15, 2018 |
HEseesall: Madam, whether both of you continue to stay together or not, this union is badly damaged and almost irretrievably so. So, in your best interest, start making plans on how to live without your husband. And I must advise you to be careful with changing the document because you may regret it later. Don't even contemplate changing it "to restore peace in the family" because peace is extremely expensive in your marriage henceforth. 1 Like |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by abike12(f): 12:42am On Jul 15, 2018 |
you better let that lazy man go, don't change sh*t. he wants a house in his name he's free to go out and acquire one. |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by oloyede252(m): 12:45am On Jul 15, 2018 |
7Alexander:very irritating. many people can't logically comprehend and analyze issues properly.. especially women on this thread. 1 Like |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by 2buffagain(m): 12:47am On Jul 15, 2018 |
dingbang: WTF is wrong with you? Why are dudes in Naija foolish like this? When you think of women as subhuman, why will they not deal with you when they come to obodo oyinbo? 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by Medunah: 12:49am On Jul 15, 2018 |
Women bend over for the men in their lives out of fear and men think it's out of respect and admiration. Why are some men so obsessed with claiming the role of God? 5 Likes |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by oloyede252(m): 12:50am On Jul 15, 2018 |
Martinez19:God.. in the same comment you said "might have partly built the house " and then you concluded by saying " reap where he did not sow ".. |
Re: My Husband's Pride Wants To Ruin Our Home by 2buffagain(m): 12:51am On Jul 15, 2018 |
HEseesall: No sensible person will kick his KIDS out of his so called house because he wants to punish his wife. You tolerate too much. The way you are doing it's like your conscience is cutting you. Are those his kids? 1 Like 1 Share |
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