CSTR1005:
The woman is terrible and I understand the husband's point of view.

He asked her to pack out like any average Nigerian man threatens when they are very annoyed. He was probably never going to see it through on the long run.

Only to have his wife deflect his ego that the property he thought was a family asset belonged to his wife.
A massive treachery.

I am sure he is never going to stay in that house again. He'd rather rent his own house than live there.

If the woman knows what is good for her, she'd better retrace her steps and change the ownership to a family name or in the children's names.

If not, That guy would go out there and get a new wife in time and rent a new house, and she would be stuck with three children.

Daeylar:


Why say the woman should stay single, ? Because of what? Is her ex husband the only man in the world?

Some of you won't come down from the clouds and realise men abound plentifully on this earth and a woman can always make her choice from the pick of men, or she can CHOOSE to remain single.

anyerhovwo:


My dear, don't change any name o, resolve the issue but let your name remain on documents. Am speaking from experience o

Amberon11:
Husbands love your wives even as Christ loved the church and gave his life for it.

Mumu...be twisting Bible to suit your warped mentality.

adieora:


So asking his wife to pack out was love. Na only submit u remember. Ode

CrazeMan69:


I do not support the changing of the name to his name read my comment on page 14
My point remains she is wrong to claim sole ownership of a property acquired during marriage. She knows this and has tried to add her husband’s name (which I do not advise her to do except with the consel of an experienced marriage lawyer)

don4real18:

Are you trying to tell us that his money is not in the property at all... That is, you did the foundation to the roofing on your own

sholatech:
Change it to Mr & Mrs ABC. It is allowed. That way, it is now for both of you.

HEseesall:
I had to open this account for anonymity
I'm in a dilemma, let me start like this, when i and my husband first got married we did a joint business that fetched us a huge amount of money, the aim was to build a house, when we got the money, he decided to use his' for his parents (i had no problem with that) then mine for what we wanted to use it for

Two weeks ago we had a major misunderstanding, it was soo intense to the extent that he told me to park out of the house, in the heat of things i told him that cannot be possible that the house is in my name, he was shocked, saying it is impossible we built it together that it's in his name, i had to remind him what happened then, he was furious saying it was wrong of me to use my name, that he cant believe he has been staying in a house that does not belong to him, he told his family what i did claming victim, then he packed out saying he wont come home till i change the name to his full name, i begged him to no avail, i dont even know how to tell my people, imagine if it was in his name, i and the kids would have been out of the house by now, he has requested for transfer from his office to another state cos of this, who does that?? He cant expect me to change it to his name.

Pls i need other advise to go about this, he is a good man but he feels his ego has been bruised, i need other options.


MODIFIED For those viewing this, i have made some clarifications down to page (1),

wordbank:

Again, you did not adhere to read this story probably where she said they agreed to her husband using his share for his family. She agreed to that.
They also agreed to buy LAND with her share, but the house is built by them not her alone. So why have all documents in her name without consulting her husband?

michaelwilli:

Why would a husband make such threat?

paulynpen:


You are just trying to form your own story, what she wrote here is very very clear and straight forward but your crooked mind will not allow you see it that way. [s]You prefer to think his father was sick what if it is true the man used his share to build for his father thinking he will use Hus wife's to build for himself?.[/s] Stop putting women in shackles its a sign of weakness.

chris31:
Kiss ur marriage good bye if u neglect ur parents & go to ur pastor
Most marriage have crashed coz of my pastor say this & that
Ur parents are in the best position to calm ur husband down coz its anger that is burning inside him
Since its not a cheating case its not that a major case
But my advice to u next time learn how to shape ur mouth anytime ur having misunderstanding with ur husband
U women are fond of that don't be surprise that its coz of the things u said to him prompted him to act this way
Again if u don't want to bring more problem to urself don't carry this issue go meet ur pastor

Obason22:
You are not wrong to use part of ur money to support ur husband, but u are wrong to use ur name as ownership without His consent, in as I'm not in support of him throwing u and kids out of the hasu, our elder said that when u beat a child with right hand u draw him with left hand, I advice u to do the needful because he was the one that brought u as wife, if u actually want peace, for me personally I cannot leave in a hasu built by my wife and has her name attached as ownership its wrong, so I pray for peace between both of u and total reconciliation, u shall over comes ur challenges and not ur challenges over coming u, Peace and restoration upon ur family.

ashjay001:



Thank u, jare.

Making ur kids, homeless fa, bcoz of anger.

Op, u knew, this day was coming, yet u didn't reason all d variables Now, u're begging to remain in d marriage?

U can't be half-smart. Change d name or forget d marriage(in d short or long run), dazzol!

wordbank:

Ogaaa, take your time to read all her posts on this issue to understand why the man you quoted said that.

HEseesall:



He doesnt want that, i suggested it he said no, he has to be in charge fully not jointly

HEseesall:
I had to open this account for anonymity
I'm in a dilemma, let me start like this, when i and my husband first got married we did a joint business that fetched us a huge amount of money, the aim was to build a house, when we got the money, he decided to use his' for his parents (i had no problem with that) then mine for what we wanted to use it for

Two weeks ago we had a major misunderstanding, it was soo intense to the extent that he told me to park out of the house, in the heat of things i told him that cannot be possible that the house is in my name, he was shocked, saying it is impossible we built it together that it's in his name, i had to remind him what happened then, he was furious saying it was wrong of me to use my name, that he cant believe he has been staying in a house that does not belong to him, he told his family what i did claming victim, then he packed out saying he wont come home till i change the name to his full name, i begged him to no avail, i dont even know how to tell my people, imagine if it was in his name, i and the kids would have been out of the house by now, he has requested for transfer from his office to another state cos of this, who does that?? He cant expect me to change it to his name.

Pls i need other advise to go about this, he is a good man but he feels his ego has been bruised, i need other options.


MODIFIED For those viewing this, i have made some clarifications down to page (1),

Sterope:
It could have been an omission on his part. No one is perfect. If he didn't bother, he clearly didn't think twice of HER CONTRIBUTION when he asked her to pack out.

You may be older than me but I know that men have asked their wives to pack out for something less than a word or two. They use as an instrument of control and blackmail. Besides, it is very condescending, arrogant and selfish to ask your wedded partner to pack up and leave like a fhucking guest. I really don't want to know what happened. I don't care! Do you know how fhucking long it took her to move in? No wonder men are scared to live in their wive's house. You can't bear to go through what you put women through because you own a fhucking house, do you? Hypocrite much? :-Disrespect or not, what should a woman do when her husband disrespect her? poison him or ask him to leave if she happens to own the house? Because I really don't understand what could justify asking your partner to pack out like a guest.

This is the same man that is now insisting on being the sole bearer. It sounds to me like a man who likes to control by fire or by force.

You think it is great to chase out a partner. I don't think it is. I don't care what could have happened. If you have a problem, you sort it out or you could make arrangements. You just don't ask your partner to pack out or throw their properties out!
I repeat it again, no real man will take that shiit from any woman. She has that much audacity and boldness to square up.to her husband because she knows she has a leverage over him. She put the issue up here because she really wants to keep her home. She knows things are going South in her family. Despite how intelligent it sounds, your argument would hardly make a home. A bird needs two wings to fly. Besides, do you think it's that easy to divorce a woman you love and bn living together for long? Marriage is not dating pls. Many things are involved.

oshe11:
Alot of You are getting things wrong here....


The only thing the wife Own is THE LAND






They built the house TOGETHER!!!


2NDLY.....

What did she do to Warrant a GOOD man wanting her to leave?

And when she refused, he packed out and transfered?

Oklander:


So, when I just read the post, this question was what came to my mind. Unfortunately nobody on the first page asked. And, I do not know whether I missed it, but I couldn't find the response from the 2nd page that you happened to ask the very important question to around the 5th page that I could reach.

Madam op, the crap that most feminists wannabe and the so called feminists, and the disrespectful girls here who hasn't experinecd the marriage institution, and those girls who kept on criticizing the African marriage instituion, and the ones who totally lacks what a good man wants in a woman and the rest others who couldn't think far to what exactly you have done to turn a 'good man' into a monster(only a monster would want to chase out his own family JUST LIKE THAT), will not help you and the problem. The craps may make you feel better now but certainly for a very short period of time. As far the most important issue is not factored into what they are telling you here now makes it crap.


Do not tell us what happened is private and can't be revealed here, you made the post already.


With the little you presented up there, the man is now seen as a monster, very wicked and unreasonable? Agreed. But then, tell us, what have you done to a man you knew to be a 'GOOD MAN' to turn him to a WICKED MAN as presented in your op.?

dingbang:
How did you manage to put your name as the owner or the house without letting him know? You are a snitch

Martinez19:
lol. What sort of husband is that? Madam, if you love yourself, don't change the name to his. That man is full of pride, manipulative and mean. He wanted to throw you out of the house? If his name was on it, you would have been out. It's either he loves you or not. If he can't swallow his pride and strive to mend your relationship for the sake of love then forget the mean man. Who throws his wife that loves him out of the house over a mere disagreement?

He can't eat his cake and have it.

adubiay:


One major problem we have in Africa is that we don't pay attention to details before we start saying rubbish, @op said she bought the LAND with her money in her name, but they BOTH contributed to build the house. I guess the husband never knew the land is in the wife's name when he was pumping his money into the project, that might have formed basis for his anger, though he is over reacting, pls madam don't scatter your marriage based on some advise here from children who are not married, admit you are wrong by putting only your name, and bring your husband back home. You have ego too, so ur caption here that your husband has ego is wrong.

HEseesall:



You dont understand, we have kids, i am working but i cant do everything on my own, how will i tell them we are no more together because of property