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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men (26814 Views)
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The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by Nobody: 10:22am On Aug 22, 2018 |
A man spends his whole life chasing money, mostly not for his own needs but for that of his immediate family. The wife works quite alright but there is an unwritten law that says he must provide all her needs because he is a "man", so he saves up and the first car he buys he gives to his wife because "she's a woman, she shouldn't be stressed up" he can still jump buses till he affords to buy another car. The house rent gets due and he is short of 50k so his wife adds up from her savings and they pay. Two months into the renewal of the rent the wife starts nagging about how she really needs her 50k, there are things she needs to do, most of which are all superfluous. He pays her back her 50k that she contributed to the good of the same family. His wife isn't very good at driving so he comes home to see she has bashed in the right door of her car. "I'm a little pressed for money dear, I won't be able to fix that anytime soon, do you have some money to spare?" She says she doesn't so the car gets parked for a month or two in which his eardrums were nearly perforated with nagging and complains. She's pregnant! Yay! the first child is here, it's a girl. That brings it's own responsibilities. The wife's family came to visit to congratulate them and when they leave, another unwritten law says that as a "man" you should give them money for transport The Man's own family comes too and the same unwritten law is applied. They get more children and have to move to a bigger house which requires bigger money for rent. And with children expenses don't decrease as they grow older it increases. One day you wake up and you are 65years old realizing you've done absolutely nothing for yourself as a man but slaved to satisfy others, most of which aren't even grateful for the sacrifice. Written by https://www.nairaland.com/barayeks 224 Likes 25 Shares
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Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by adamsoghene: 10:31am On Aug 22, 2018 |
Simple but truthfully. This is the harsh truth but it's happening everyday & most homes are guilty of it. May God help men with wisdom always . 122 Likes 5 Shares |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by Nobody: 10:34am On Aug 22, 2018 |
That's only a scenario when you marry an unreasonable wife. But there are a lot of unreasonable women out there lol 38 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by Archangels2(m): 10:35am On Aug 22, 2018 |
Very true... Im just starting out life as a man and its being to feel like that ![]() 16 Likes |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by Nobody: 10:36am On Aug 22, 2018 |
pcguru1: I think Nigerian men are the cause of these problems. 6 Likes |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by Nobody: 10:41am On Aug 22, 2018 |
Hanseel1: Actually we are, we've been tied up in a web that we created; the Patriarchy , we set the rules and by the rules we're forced to be a slave to what we created. Irony 39 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by Nobody: 10:45am On Aug 22, 2018 |
Besides that's simply the cost to being the man of the house. 4 Likes |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by frankkydee(m): 10:45am On Aug 22, 2018 |
Hanseel1: The manipulated man,go and read it 24 Likes |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by Nobody: 10:55am On Aug 22, 2018 |
frankkydee: |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by donbachi(m): 11:15am On Aug 22, 2018 |
This is the reason why anytime i borrow money from my wife i don't pay back...i even borrowed this morning. 144 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by Nasri100(m): 11:36am On Aug 22, 2018 |
Will never forget this article 11 Likes |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by jericco1(m): 11:39am On Aug 22, 2018 |
I'm impressed, this is lovely 3 Likes |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by Nobody: 11:41am On Aug 22, 2018 |
This is why so many men are refusing to get married and opting for baby mamas. Wahala plenty 60 Likes 1 Share |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by MasterBaiter: 11:44am On Aug 22, 2018 |
No pity for men who become slaves to their own ego. 8 Likes 1 Share |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by Wilfredpat22(f): 11:49am On Aug 22, 2018 |
You men are really trying but you guys use women alot. The best thing is to find your footings (financially) before asking any of us out. During your hustle or struggle days don’t be in any serious relationship. Remember we women have nothing to lose. We got our Poosie to help us in any situation. May God help you all 45 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by Nobody: 12:02pm On Aug 22, 2018 |
MasterBaiter: You're right, sir. This happens to men who allow ego to control their sense of reasoning. In a bid to become head of the house they enslave themselves. They want women who are submissive and will be dependent on them so that they can control them like slaves yet cry out over financial burden. Some even refuse to tell their wives to contribute because of ego. The only way to stop this is to marry a woman who'll contribute even if it's 30% and you also share house chores but no ,they want to form head of the house while they're dying from burden. You'll see a Nigerian man who was fair in complexion when he got married turn into a black complexion because of too much burden. In this 21st century, no matter how rich you are don't marry a woman that wouldn't contribute because nobody knows tomorrow. 69 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by Femeto: 1:10pm On Aug 22, 2018 |
Typical Nigerian lady.Not a good mentality. Wilfredpat22: 43 Likes 1 Share |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by LordKO(m): 1:35pm On Aug 22, 2018 |
A situation of such happens where a man married his frenemy as a wife - marry a self-centered and/or greedy woman at your own peril. A marriage devoid of oneness isn't a healthy marriage - where there's oneness there'll be mutual conscientiousness (altruism, kindness, selflessness, sincerity and goodness in general). Meanwhile mutual conscientiousness is quite different from thoughts and actions of selfishness and self-centeredness glossed in the garb of equality. I mean a situation whereby a selfish, greedy and self-centered man, in the name of being a proponent of equality (or feminism), tries to evade bearing responsibilities that comes with leadership in the house by resorting to a wack thought process and action like "we will always share all responsibilities in equal measures." How do you intend to share the pains associated with pregnancy and labor contractions (childbirth pains)? Equality doesn't mean a man "sharing" house bills with his wife - the most buoyant, in case where the wife has a good job, ought to cheerfully do what's needful at any point in time - or allowing his wife to take up heavily physical tasks. As an egalitarian, equality to me means mutual conscientiousness. Thoughtlessness, selfishness and self-centeredness are products of vices. Couples should strive to master how to be cheerful givers and grateful receivers - reciprocation of goodness (not necessary in equal measures) is the soul of every healthy marriage/union/relationship. As a man try to know what you need and go for it; don't go for a partner or tormentor when what you need is a wife - a wife should be a keeper and helper. When you marry a wife in this settings you automatically have a submissive woman - submissiveness isn't evil. Submissiveness in this context shouldn't be mistaken for either submission or slavery, because it recognizes self-dominion. Egalitarianism doesn't negates leadership, and there's no kingdom without the king (a king's wife is a queen, not neither a subject, competitor nor subordinate) - leadership (headship) neither mean subjugation nor mastery. 26 Likes 6 Shares |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by Nobody: 3:32pm On Aug 22, 2018 |
LordKO: You're yet to get married. When you eventually do, this big grammar will refuse to be typed when you intend to. You're just so focused/concerned on being the leader/king to the extent that you're ready to do anything to sustain that position even if it'll mess up your emotional life spam. 31 Likes |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by priestly1016(m): 6:17pm On Aug 22, 2018 |
[quote author=Wilfredpat22 post=70503553]You men are really trying but you guys use women alot. The best thing is to find your footings (financially) before asking any of us out. During your hustle or struggle days don’t be in any serious relationship. Remember we women have nothing to lose. We got our Poosie to help us in any situation. May God help you all Can u just take a moment and reas this again 8 Likes |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by romenna: 9:28pm On Aug 22, 2018 |
The best tin to do is; Arrange 2 or 3 sources of income b4 getting married. 25 Likes 1 Share |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by 420mp3(m): 10:01pm On Aug 22, 2018 |
ok 1 Like |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by 420mp3(m): 10:02pm On Aug 22, 2018 |
romenna: hmmm |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by amanikondo: 10:03pm On Aug 22, 2018 |
donbachi: My fellow brother in tha lord ![]() ![]() ![]() 13 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by pol23: 10:05pm On Aug 22, 2018 |
Anybody that cannot maintain a car don't deserve one until their financial status change. I can only service my wife's car once in two years.... 4 Likes
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Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by Davidfash10000: 10:05pm On Aug 22, 2018 |
Ok |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by Viking007(m): 10:06pm On Aug 22, 2018 |
[s] Wilfredpat22:[/s] You don't have sense. 38 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by mofeoluwadassah: 10:07pm On Aug 22, 2018 |
. |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by tatibillion: 10:07pm On Aug 22, 2018 |
No wonder our men no dey live long 3 Likes |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by HajimeSaito(m): 10:07pm On Aug 22, 2018 |
The day the feminist movement starts preaching equality of responsibility as well as equality of privilege, a lot more men will respect it. 11 Likes |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by dingbang(m): 10:07pm On Aug 22, 2018 |
Wilfredpat22:you are a selfish woman 18 Likes |
Re: The Many Struggles Of Nigerian Men by dingbang(m): 10:09pm On Aug 22, 2018 |
You I'll know a wicked woman by her comment on this thread. 8 Likes |
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