I have a very close friend who has been like a brother to me right from our days in the university, we also worship in the same church, he was my best man when I wedded a few years ago. He got married this year and after the wedding things were not rosy for them the following month and I gave my little assistance as a friend. Around July this year his sister had a life threatening ailment and when he reached out to me I quickly responded with something meaningful. After some weeks his wife told me she was sick when we met in church, I quickly went to an ATM, made withdrawal and gave her money to buy drugs since her husband who happens to be my friend was not in town.

The irony of the whole thing now is
that my friend's wife now thinks that I am Father Christmas and now calls and sends texts requesting for money to take care of her antenatal drugs but I have refused to help because I believe it is wrong and she keeps pestering me.

Please what is your advice?

alimaa:
I have a very close friend who has been like a brother to me right from our days in the university, we also worship in the same church, he was my best man when I wedded a few years ago. He got married this year and after the wedding things were not rosy for them the following month and I gave my little assistance as a friend. Around July this year his sister had a life threatening ailment and when he reached out to me I quickly responded with something meaningful. After some weeks his wife told me she was sick when we net in church, I quickly went to an ATM, made withdrawal and gave her money to buy drugs since her husband who happens to be my friend was not in town.

The irony of the whole thing now is
that NY friend's wife now thinks that I am Father Christmas and now calls and send texts requesting for money to take care if her antenatal drugs but I have refused to help because I believe it is wrong.
Please what is your advice?

If you ask me... Na who I go ask?
Your Bible says whatever the right does the left shouldn't know about it. You just told the world. Blessing forfeited.
You think you're helping her? You're helping yourself.
No imagine she's reading this because you described her perfectly. Ask yourself...

My brother for the sake of God,don't withdraw your helping hands from them. As long as you have,keep helping them but make sure you do so through your friend .

Make sure her husband is aware before you give her money

Always assist with the consent of your friend. Don't be surprised that her husband provides her with those things she equally asked from you.

Bros abeg if u intend giving her money pls let her husband know ooo b4 another matter come arise from it.

The people above have said it all.

If you get, give but first let the husband know.

Technically though, she no suppose dey ask you for money sha o..................

Don't start what you can't finish....even though you want to help your friend is OK, you don't extend it to his wife to complete yourself as good man.

Except your money flowing heavily to exhaust or don't you have responsibilities?

Na Ojukokoro dey worry that woman

How sure are you that your friend dont provide for her. dont let that woman be the cause of your quarel with your mahn. if you want to give, give through your friend. one day you might be accused of .......you know the rest.

Shibaraba:

If you ask me... Na who I go ask?
Your Bible says whatever the right does the left shouldn't know about it. You just told the world. Blessing forfeited.
You think you're helping her? You're helping yourself.
No imagine she's reading this because you described her perfectly. Ask yourself...

You are wrong, you don't know me neither do you know them.

give if you have and if you don't politely turn it down...... must every situation demands online attention?

Lonestar124:
Don't start what you can't finish....even though you want to help your friend is OK, you don't extend it to his wife to complete yourself as good man.

Except your money flowing heavily to exhaust or don't you have responsibilities?

The matter tire me, I have a family to cater for.

MichaelBukamzy:
How sure are you that your friend dont provide for her. dont let that woman be the cause of your quarel with your mahn. if you want to give, give through your friend. one day you might be accused of .......you know the rest.

That is exactly what I am trying to avoid.

She's not serious, you have your own family to carter for. Isn't she even ashamed to keep asking for money! Or doesn't she have relatives?

She has no shame. Stop giving her money before she causes rift between you and your friend

alimaa:
That is exactly what I am trying to avoid.

Apply wisdom mahn. you know say naija people dey always attach unnecessary jugements to mere kindness to women.

women like this ruin men's destiny

you can tell from things that that marriage is not going well

oga give people that really need money, not that long throat

she's not in good terms with her man and I will advice you to stay away from her because the next step is SEDUCTION

bros use your sense please

alimaa:
I have a very close friend who has been like a brother to me right from our days in the university, we also worship in the same church, he was my best man when I wedded a few years ago. He got married this year and after the wedding things were not rosy for them the following month and I gave my little assistance as a friend. Around July this year his sister had a life threatening ailment and when he reached out to me I quickly responded with something meaningful. After some weeks his wife told me she was sick when we met in church, I quickly went to an ATM, made withdrawal and gave her money to buy drugs since her husband who happens to be my friend was not in town.

The irony of the whole thing now is
that my friend's wife now thinks that I am Father Christmas and now calls and sends texts requesting for money to take care of her antenatal drugs but I have refused to help because I believe it is wrong and she keeps pestering me.

Please what is your advice?

Pls help her...since it's antenatal...Just do it,Am Sure God Has bigger plans for you...Health is very important for an individual.

HarunaWest:

Pls help her...since it's antenatal...Just do it,Am Sure God Has bigger plans for you...Health is very important for an individual.

Without her husband's consent?

Sit with your friend and inform him of the constant requests. You have your own issues, people and health insurance

alimaa:
Without her husband's consent?

See it as charity...the husband doesn't have to no...abi u wan chop the thank you from him

MichaelBukamzy:
How sure are you that your friend dont provide for her. dont let that woman be the cause of your quarel with your mahn. if you want to give, give through your friend. one day you might be accused of .......you know the rest.

I totally agree with this. Stop giving to her directly. And please let your friend know anytime she ask you for money. Then give through her husband to her.

No sane person will love to beg another person for help perpetually, and people always go back to where they have received help before.
I would have preferred if it's your friend that is doing the asking but he might have become tired and frustrated that he is now a charity case. Borrowing without end and not knowing even if he can ever pay back.
Please continue doing your bit, God sees your heart, like I always say life is like a pendulum, you don't know which direction it might swing tomorrow.

I think it is disrespectful to give a married woman money (especially if it is a substantial sum) behind her husband.

You have to stop o before she turns it to something else. The woman is a parasite. Don't let her ruin your friendship with her husband. Antenatal ko! Brodanatal ni! Shey na you impregnate her?

Homeboiy:
Make sure her husband is aware before you give her money

U have made a VALID POINT
RESPECT Man

Wow.. Please barr her number. If she can't reach you, she will get the message. What kind of woman does that? Some men can even use that as an opportunity to proposition her for se.xx. That's a perfect opportunity for some bad guys to arrange how they will knack her even with that pregnancy. If she is asking for the money with her husband's consent, he would be the one to contact the op directly not her. Maybe she is seeing marriage to her husband as a mistake and wants to switch to the op. Because this is one of the most disregarding things a woman can do to her husband's ego.

.
Who impregnate woman different, who she dey disturb for antenatal drug dey different! They could have held off on having a baby until they are in a better place financially. But no, most Nigerians prefer to live their lives to please the society even to their detriment. She is rubbishing her husband by asking you for money. Dunno how some women see themselves sha.