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Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant Part 2 / Living In The Uk/life As A UK Immigrant / Living In Australia/life As An Australian Immigrant (2) (3) (4)
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Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by AZeD1(m): 4:36pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
Guitarlife: 13 Likes |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Nobody: 4:36pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
Bsbabe:With all due respect let me say this , you have a problem with point 2 right ? What of point 1 and 3 ? Do you have a problem with those too ? |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Nobody: 4:38pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
AZeD1:bros abeg I nor dey follow you drag na ? You can go and marry a tiger if you like thats your prerogative I am reviewing this with another person make I focus abeg. 7 Likes |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Ifeoma77(f): 4:40pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
Guitarlife:Jesus!!! Are you for real?? I have typed 5 different responses and deleted all 5 because I am trying to be respectful. All I'll say is; thank God you're moving to Canada. Please take advantage of the free health care and see a psychologist/therapist. You have deep issues and the way you interpret events is very skewed 37 Likes |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Nobody: 4:41pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
Guitarlife: Bros, I have a problem with everything, which was why I used the phrase "especially the bolded". But what do I know? I am only a woman so it is hard to understand where you are coming from 7 Likes |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Ndukaezennia1: 4:44pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
Looool! I like your babe shaa! Well @guitar my man just let us drop this topic. You have dropped the Babe finito. You want to marry submissive wife. Bros you will see plenty of them. But what no one can guarantee is how submissive she will remain if she comes to this Cannyland. Look at the statistics from Salford. Nnaa you must leave your mind open at this point. Marriage get plenty hurdles. No story online can explain the loops. Whatever you want go for it. Shikena...[ Although I feel you got PR and exed the babe fast inorder to upgrade to better Canny quality! Looool! But I do not judge you my man at all. quote author=Guitarlife post=74053038] While I respect your opinion , yet again I am stating that the bolded already addresses that area of your concern. Have you thought that the man can ask the woman to take the key and drive ? But one person has to lead, even a pack of wolves is not led by 2 it never works. This clearly shows my position , I wonder why people intentionally choose to twist my position. The man is the head of the home but from this statement you'd see that the wife is welcome to take initiatives too. This concept is learned over a lifetime for many and at times never learned for some so I won't expect that it'd be so easy for you to comprehend if you haven't already. I have decided not to comment on this again but you have forced me now, let me explain something. Now A man his wife and 2 kids, an armed robber comes into the house and their is gun that the family can use to defend themselves and a place to hide for 2 people . Which 3 people do you think will hide ? The wife and the 2 kids Which person do you think will carry the gun and face the robber ? The man, he will put his life down for his family. Now we have a situation where some one must carry the pregnancy while someone must wait and pray eagerly for safe delivery , who does what here ? The wife carries the pregnancy (An heroic thing and grossly underrated feat in this part of the world) Now from my analogies you will see that the man and the woman are not equal but rather unique in their differences. The inability of western countries to acknowledge this uniqueness and accomodate it is responsible for the dysfunctionality of marriages over there. For all their education and exposure marriages hard last 2 years and this should tell you there is something wrong somewhere, I am not saying the African approach is entirely perfect but the foundation has to be well laid to prevent problems. Lastly, I will tell you something that should drive this home, this happened with my former babe and this was one of the major pointers for me that made me run. We were both travelling - a public transport, so what happened the car broke down in the middle of the road and the driver needed to give us part of the money we paid so we can board another vehicle to our final destination. So lets just say we paid 10 naira and the journey had only gone 50% so technically the man was supposed to give us 5 naira right ? Well I told my bae to wait for me in the car, I went to meet the driver and after some back and forth the driver gave me 3 naira, I protested but I didnt get ahead so I came back to her and told her I got 3 naira and altho it was not fair we could just overlook the 2 naira. My bae became irate went to meet the driver and got into a fit or rage long story short she succesfully retrieved 2 naira and came back to me grinning from ear to ear with a sense of accomplishment visibly written on her face. That moment I knew I had made a mistake being with her. Why ? (Please note I paid for the journey 100%). 1. The rage and anger displayed was something I had never seen in her, I could never have imagined she was capable of such. 2. The audacity to go and re-negotiate with the driver was not only insensitive to me but showed a lack of respect for my judgement. 3. The reason I choose to allow the driver get away with the 2 naira was because I felt this illiterate drivers sometimes could be violent and dangerous and there was not point risking my life over 2 naira - now her decision to proceed to wrestle for the rest of the money to me showed a lack of proper orientation in value system. So I had to type this much to put some things in perspective for you, like I said earlier relationship issues are quite tricky and this event I narrated was only the last straw the broke the camels back as I had seen some traces of this kind of behaviour at some time earlier. [/quote] |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Nobody: 4:44pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Nobody: 4:46pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
Lmao you’re the funny fellow. Good luck to you and your outside ways but plis dear never lop me in with your ways. Cherokee: 1 Like |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Nobody: 4:49pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
Ifeoma77:Ifeoma I can picture you with your mouth still wide open. Yes I ran away from her, I ran and never looked back. The rage, the temper displayed and like I stated the audacity was very distubing for me, if we decide she will handle something I should respect and accepet the manner she handles it even if I feel I could have done it better. This ensures there are no conflicts and unnecessary arguments. And can I point out that this was just a relationship, if we were married I'd have no choice than to swallow it ofcourse but am grateful it was not too late to run so I did an Usain Bolt 6 Likes |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by czaratwork: 4:50pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
If you are in Nigeria and not yet in Canada and contributing to this headship and authority in marriage please wait until you land here and face the moment of truth. Nobody will tell you that you need to plan how to make your marriage work here. If you carry on with that headship mentality, it's just a matter of time before it happens. I have seen a man feeding a baby in a pram here all by himself. Such a thing would not happen in Nigeria, shame no go even gree the man. I understand guitarlife's viewpoint that his babe is claiming equality in Naija and his fears that with all the privileges women have here, he may be the houseboy when they move to Canada but your assumptions may be wrong. She could turn out to be the best. There is no thing as good as looking at the reality and considering the options to make it work best for 2 of you. My 2 cents. 25 Likes |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Nobody: 4:51pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
Yaay. Me I love your style. You, me and my white friends must meet when you land boo. Ifeoma77: 1 Like |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Nobody: 4:52pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
Lmao. I’m a psychologist. This one needs institutionalisation. Ifeoma77: 5 Likes |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by deTimo: 4:53pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
What a thread! What a read What a day. I learnt from all the divide lines. It's both the "how to" and "how not to" Life is good. Anyway we see it. Just flow with what works for and with you. Lemme go tune the shouting down. Hope parents are protected from kids challenging parents with human equality. 7 Likes |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Nobody: 4:54pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
I’ll bet good money that this guitar life person’s babe is the one that ended the relationship. People who are the dumpers are not usually this passionate and enraged. 8 Likes |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Nobody: 4:54pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
Guitarlife: Permit me to ask though. Could the real reason you ran away be because she showed you up and you felt emasculated as she succeeded where you had failed? Could it be that you felt threatened by a strong woman? Have you thought of that? That maybe you are just not wired to handle a strong woman? 30 Likes |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Nobody: 4:55pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
czaratwork:You got me small , you did. The picture my fellow arguementators are running with is of a lady who is already earning 50/50 with her man or probably contributing 80% even if the woman is the one feeding me , going back to re-negotiate violently in such a precarious situation for me was a no no. That seemed like a pointer to what was to come and like I said since we were not married yet I was well within my rights to run, if we were married I'd take it as my cross and bear it. 2 Likes |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Nobody: 4:55pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
Una well done oo. I'm enjoying this interesting discussion. 22 Likes |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Nobody: 4:56pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
You don’t need to ask. You darn right! Bsbabe: 3 Likes |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Nobody: 4:58pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
Bsbabe:She was literally almost getting into a fight with a driver ? Do you understand what that means ? What kind of woman goes on such a shameful display ? The rage, the temper ? Well I understand some people might think nothing of that but me I dont consider strength to be the ability to fight or become irate, its the ability to remain calm in the face of provocation. My consideration was for the greater good and thats what a man does, think about safety and make better judgements. What if in her bid to argue her case the man injured her or something ? Dont just be unnecessarily subjective here, this isn't so blurred is it ? 5 Likes |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by czaratwork: 5:02pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
And to add to my 2 cents making it 3 cents. What works for couple A may not work for couple B. If the woman is earning way higher would you because of headship ask her to resign and be doing school runs just to show your male ego? Both of you have to sit down and have a discussion of your goals in Canada and how to achieve them. At some point its one party making the sacrifice at another point it's the other party. Once there is love and trust, other things fall in naturally. 8 Likes |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by JobsInIT: 5:03pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
So women don’t make good/better judgement abi? See as you dey throw shade anyhow, come dey pat yourself for back. I just dey look u Anyway, I am enjoying the argument more than the insult. Continue... Guitarlife: 6 Likes |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Canadachi: 5:05pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
Guitarlife: |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Nobody: 5:07pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
deTimo:We are almost 24 hours into this can someone bring up another topic so we can close this. We know nobody is winning this so let both sides of the divide sheath their swords and go home. I hereby declare this debate No victor No vanquished 1 Like |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by czaratwork: 5:07pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
Guitarlife: These should have been your main reasons of backing out and not her claiming equality with you. You caused what came upon you here. You may still need to get a wife from Niaja because that one sure pass. 5 Likes |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Nobody: 5:07pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
Guitarlife: "The rage"..."the temper"..."being irate"... "almost getting into a fight"... all these are from your perspective and is your side of the story though. And from the little we know of your expectations of women, even raising her voice a pitch higher may just be her showing enough disrespect to prove she can never be a 'submissive' wife. And then I would ask, did you educate her that what she did was dangerous and why you had felt there was no need to get into a fight with the driver? If your sister had done it, would you have disowned her? No, you would have enlightened her because she is your sister and you love her and won't want her to do it again. Where was the love for your girlfriend here when your only reaction was to dump her because she simply didn't "fit the mould". That's the love Christ said husbands should have for their wives. In my opinion, you were looking for perfect submission where perfect love did not exist. I really do wish you the best in finding what you seek but I believe you should take some time to think about what the married people here have told you and that is you will never find that perfectly submissive human being you seek as no human being (male or female) is wired to be an 'addendum' or a 'footnote'. You will have to sacrifice some of your firmly held beliefs for you to make that partnership work if you don't want it to end up being a failed project (and yes, I use the word partnership). My two cents. 20 Likes |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Nobody: 5:11pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
Majesticniyi:Please permit me to acknowledge this insightful contribution just before the curtain draws on this episode of the programme. 7 Likes |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Nobody: 5:11pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
*picks up all the 2 cents on the thread* I need money for good furniture. 9 Likes |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by jmnsimone(f): 5:11pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
LMAO, this is one of the reasons I'm relocating, I need to surround myself with better people, not those who see women as subordinates. SkyWalk12: 4 Likes |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Nobody: 5:13pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
Bsbabe:To be honest we have all learnt a thing or two , well I have so I think your suggestion here is also in good faith. Thank you for the advise and I will sure to remember that. The end !!!!!!!!!!!!! 2 Likes |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Nobody: 5:15pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
Girl, you feel me. When I went to Jand for school, the first year I had zero Nigerian friends, best year hands down. They (the Asians that some people that have never crossed the border seem to have a problem with here) were always feeding me. My accent changed and my hair grew longer. jmnsimone: 2 Likes |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Nobody: 5:16pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
SkyWalk12:Integrity ?? Be sure to return the money to its rightful owner. 1 Like |
Re: Living In Canada/Life As A Canadian Immigrant by Ndukaezennia1: 5:18pm On Dec 21, 2018 |
No vex bros. But why did you omit that verse? Udo! May we all flourish in the new land. DadR: 2 Likes |
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