victorian:
I intend to buy properties on my full names, not husband name join, but I will let him know a day before buying it. If he wants to buy ,he can buy . And all my properties will be willed to my children .
Cause my late mum willed hers to us and that's what gave us the leverage we have financially in opening our own companies and buisnesses .
While our late dad willed his own to all his children from other wives with us . War in my father's properties between the siblings excluding me is terrible .

When I saw the rivalry and power tussle , I vow never to have a hand in my dad's properties , so I can live long. I simply focused on what my late mum left for me and my sibling. I'm content with it . With that been said , I will definitely Will all I have to my kids .

awon eyan Elder0001


Must you learn from your father and mother? How about learning from those who have had and sustained great families?

TheWalkingMind:
Nothing wrong in it. Only a senile man will make a hill out of such a mountain. As far as I'm concerned marriage is meant to be a peaceful coexistence with no constraint of choices and freedom. A woman in a marriage has as much right as a man in the same marriage. She is human before being a wife.

Idiots like you don't have a love life or a PARTNER. Read about PARTNERSHIP. Buy a house in our name or let us be aware of the intent of buying a house with your name. Your type would say she bleeped another man because I wasn't around and I am cool with it because she is human.

Well, the kind of husband you have will determine how you go about acquiring properties. If telling him will not stop you from getting the property then go ahead and let him know . And please get it in your own name. Its very crucial. ' Cos no one knows tomorrow.

Acidosis:



awon eyan Elder0001


Must you learn from your father and mother? How about learning from those who have had and sustained great families?

Yes ! I Must!

If my late mum had bought her properties in my father's name , sorry would have been my name by now. What even motivated her to buy three houses was when she saw my dad buying his own , without adding her name or any other wives names to his own. And she knows in a polygamous home , there is always strife and sorrows .

So she did a smart and intelligent move by buying hers , 3 houses ! My dad has 3houses too.

My children means all the world to me ,if their father decides to make a mistake later in future cause of his dickk! I don't want it to affect their joy and peace of mind later on in life .
Men ehn!? Only God will help them to plan the life of their family and children well.
Depend on man fully and one is in deep shit!

Like I read on nairaland , a man waking up one day packing his wife load out of his house , and saying he's tired of the marriage . the mother of the wife came to fight man . in the process the wife wants to carry TV. Ordinary TV, both of them are fighting over until he break tv and the wife and mother pounced on him

I wonder at these people and am like TV? For Godsake TV? What's TV? For me TV is irrelevant . I dashed some people online household stuffs like printer, washing machine and my neighbour, I dashed him and his wife my 34" led TV and DVD , they were so happy and I replaced the ones I dashed out with brand new ones, no be brag na fact!

But when I read stories like struggling to claim TV between husband and wife , I shake my head and I decreed God punish poverty.!!
If not who wil claim TV between husband and wife became a brawl? God forbid .

Anyways I vow to protect my kids like my mother protected us . That's the only example I see and I believe in. Any other from any other family? I don't want to know . You know why? Because people lie a lot !they wouldn't say the truth . and I don't have time watching 24/7 on what's going on in other "great families ".

No time. Am not that jobless !

pocohantas:


All this talk because a woman buys a property in her name? Don't married men buy properties in their names everyday? It is a regular thing that making a topic about it would be very absurd.

Every time, don't marry. Are you the one that will tell me if I should marry? Or you think every man reasons like you? shut the fck up.




The topic isn't if you will tell the man or not. Maybe you should read the topic again. That said, whether he agrees or not, I will make investments I deem necessary.

U can have kids without having a husband. Marriage is not for everyone

victorian:






Yes ! I Must!

If my late mum had bought her properties in my father's name , sorry would have been my name by now. What even motivated her to buy three houses was when she saw my dad buying his own , without adding her name or any other wives names to his own. And she knows in a polygamous home , there is always strife and sorrows .

So she did a smart and intelligent move by buying hers , 3 houses ! My dad has 3houses too.

My children means all the world to me ,if their father decides to make a mistake later in future cause of his dickk! I don't want it to affect their joy and peace of mind later on in life .
Men ehn!? Only God will help them to plan the life of their family and children well.
Depend on man fully and one is in deep shit!

Like I read on nairaland , a man waking up one day packing his wife load out of his house , and saying he's tired of the marriage . the mother of the wife came to fight man . in the process the wife wants to carry TV. Ordinary TV, both of them are fighting over until he break tv and the wife and mother pounced on him

I wonder at these people and am like TV? For Godsake TV? What's TV? For me TV is irrelevant . I dashed some people online household stuffs like printer, washing machine and my neighbour, I dashed him and his wife my 34" led TV and DVD , they were so happy and I replaced the ones I dashed out with brand new ones, no be brag na fact!

But when I read stories like struggling to claim TV between husband and wife , I shake my head and I decreed God punish poverty.!!
If not who wil claim TV between husband and wife became a brawl? God forbid .

Anyways I vow to protect my kids like my mother protected us . That's the only example I see and I believe in. Any other from any other family? I don't want to know . You know why? Because people lie a lot !they wouldn't say the truth . and I don't have time watching 24/7 on what's going on in other "great families ".

No time. Am not that jobless !

First, your kids do not belong to you alone. Every other thing you wrote are some of the reasons some men and women avoid people from polygamous and broken homes. Your past experiences have so much shaped you to the extent nothing I say will change your mind.

My only recommendation for your man is to share same mindset with you - individually struggle and contest for the heart of his kids.

Some of us do not care today which of our parents spent this or that on us while we were growing up because we saw our parents do stuffs together.

mrblessed:
"Content" or contented? I equally feel you did not represent you dad in the best way possible. To be honest, your description of him left much to be desired. It is obvious you struggled to present a vivid picture of his disposition to acquiring properties, next time when revealing an unpleasant fact about a relation be very careful of your choice of words. Cheers!

Contented, noted. And thanks.

You don't need to “desire” my father. That is not the idea. No sir!
He is a great man, and every human has their own not-so wonderful aspects. I gave that example citing that part of him for obvious reasons.
He doesn't have to insult him too. If he had a problem with my story, trash it out with me, not with the person on the story. Except of course that he is ill-mannered.

You feel differently (about the story, about the topic, about my opinion), you cup of sour tea!
Cheers!

Your husband should be aware of it

Acidosis:

Any property she acquires before marriage is technically hers and such can remain in her name. In marriage, whatever anybody buys, remains in our collective names. If we don't buy in our collective name (Mr & Mrs.), then we buy in our children's name(s).
If you want to acquire properties in your own name and surname, please do before marriage.

I'm not preparing for a doom. If 19 out of 20 homes break on a per second basis, my views still won't change. No room for selfishness, self-centeredness, arrogance and evil plots from either side.

Thank you. I wonder where the partnership that is supposed to be what marriage is about flew to. In acquiring properties, definitely my wife and my children's names will feature prominently. And then she'll then acquire and put only her name?! Doesn't make any sense to me.

Doesn't make sense at all.

dharamanil:


Idiots like you don't have a love life or a PARTNER. Read about PARTNERSHIP. Buy a house in our name or let us be aware of the intent of buying a house with your name. Your type would say she bleeped another man because I wasn't around and I am cool with it because she is human.

I would have replied you but that would be a waste of intellectual effort considering of course your important nobody can't do something as simple as sane expression of mind. As tempting as it is to say the obvious that you lack home training, I will rather render my condolences to that unfortunate woman that has, or will marry you.

TheWalkingMind:
I would have replied you but that would be a waste of intellectual effort considering of course your important nobody can't do something as simple as sane expression of mind. As tempting as it is to say the obvious that you lack home training, I will rather render my condolences to that unfortunate woman that has, or will marry you.

Compose a long sentence with excess grammar without any reasonable conclusion

dharamanil:


Compose a long sentence with excess grammar without any reasonable conclusion

Since you lack common sense it's impossible to see the sense in what was written. Not surprising.

The woman gives up her authority over her own life

The whole post was phrased to sound like it was meaningful but then you read this part and it’s obviously just another misogynistic concept disguised as something good.

Why don’t you give up authority over your own life and let your wife love you instead.

Oh I forget. That’s not how ‘god’ wants it.

obembet:
Is there anything wrong with a wife buying a property in her name?

To me, I think many of we ladies and married women misbehaves whenever we are privilege to have some properties. So I think it's better to let our husband aware of any steps we want to take.. Some men will even approved and support it.

Guys let's hear your opinion, let others learn from your views.

I do not know the ladies you are referencing.

However, it is wrong for either couple (husband/wife) to acquire assets without the knowledge of the other in a sane marriage.

I do not even see the need for acquiring separate assets in the first place.

Note I said 'in a sane marriage.'

I realise that many 'insane' marriages abound.

fastseo:


I hope you are married? Hiding things from your husband like house and other investment is not wise at all. You have to let him know he is your husband and not an enemy or village people.
The man too have to let his wife knows before getting any property or going into investment for two heads is better than one.
A man should allow his wife know how his will should look like when he dies. Even self who is the man struggling for if not the wife and children? Or will the man will his property to his brothers and family members.

We all have to chill in this feminist thing, this is the reason we are having broken homes here and there, during the days of our father nothing like broken homes but today after 3 or 4 years marriage has broken why because women are now trying to be the head of the family which naturally its not so.

Your last paragraph is funny.

No broken homes in days of old?

OK o.

Reading topics like this gives me headache because you start seeing how many Nigerian men are mentally unstable control freak sociopaths.

Just imagine one fool on this thread saying women should give up control over their lives because they are married.

Somebody I know is going through this now in Europe, he was using his own money to build in Nigeria properties in both of them name not mr and mrs only, whilst the wife saved to take mortgage in Europe to day they are both living in the house bought by the wife without his name and he is trying to put his name on the deed of oath but the wife refused and said that he is her tenants whilst the man contributes to the house rent in fact he pays half of the mortgage.

Since then the man has been going through all sorts of insults, infact you need to see how the wife brags about owning house and always present the husband or house boy as mr no body.

My opinion is that authority is not good in woman’s hand cos they will always abuse it seriously without blinking, women can cut their eyes to patch their nose terribly terrible.

VULCAN:
When à teenager is talking who has spent too much time watching Kardashians.... It shows.

Little girls whose paradigm of marriage is based on Western reality shows should shut up and learn from women who have been successful in marriage AND Business.

Even Beyonce doesn't buy property without discussing with Jay-Z.

I guess the couple you refer to in the bolded, discuss their purchase with you which is how you know this?

Acidosis:


First, your kids do not belong to you alone. Every other thing you wrote are some of the reasons some men and women avoid people from polygamous and broken homes. Your past experiences have so much shaped you to the extent nothing I say will change your mind.

My only recommendation for your man is to share same mindset with you - individually struggle and contest for the heart of his kids.

Some of us do not care today which of our parents spent this or that on us while we were growing up because we saw our parents do stuffs together.

No need contesting for the heart of the kids by buying properties and telling them it's theirs , such act is the height of foolishness.
All you need to do has a parent is fulfil your God given trait as a father and do the needful in their lives , likewise the mother as well.
I don't see anything wrong if a mother decides to will or name her properties on the name of the children .
You know why?

Because I know , I will not bury my children . my children will live after me and give me a befitting burial when my time comes to leave this earth . If my husband wild his properties to the kids , I see nothing wrong in it , even if the properties bear their names , its still applaudable . Nothing wrong in it .

But when some men start fidgetting or getting worked up the properties are named after the children , baffles me. Will u as a man, live forever ? Won't u die one day? Or u want to be burying ypir kids abi?

You men with such foolish mindset should think with your brains for God sakes !

Then lastly. U don't tell your kids UV willed all your properties to them. Its after the parent demise, they get to know .in so doing , they are already independent on their own , not waiting for you to kick the bucket before they start enjoying what's on ground .

Bros! Be wise when training your kids . And fulfil your fatherly role to them , and they will love you . Instead of competing with your wife on who will win the heart of the kids completely . It's uncalled for .

CHoccolaTE:
Reading topics like this gives me headache because you start seeing how many Nigerian men are mentally unstable control freak sociopaths.

Just imagine one fool on this thread saying women should give up control over their lives because they are married.

Don't mind them

The men think they will live forever !

As if they are gods!

victorian:








No need contesting for the heart of the kids by buying properties and telling them it's theirs , such act is the height of foolishness.
All you need to do has a parent is fulfil your God given trait as a father and do the needful in their lives , likewise the mother as well.
I don't see anything wrong if a mother decides to will or name her properties on the name of the children .
You know why?

Because I know , I will not bury my children . my children will live after me and give me a befitting burial when my time comes to leave this earth . If my husband wild his properties to the kids , I see nothing wrong in it , even if the properties bear their names , its still applaudable . Nothing wrong in it .

But when some men start fidgetting or getting worked up the properties are named after the children , baffles me. Will u as a man, live forever ? Won't u die one day? Or u want to be burying ypir kids abi?

You men with such foolish mindset should think with your brains for God sakes !

Then lastly. U don't tell your kids UV willed all your properties to them. Its after the parent demise, they get to know .in so doing , they are already independent on their own , not waiting for you to kick the bucket before they start enjoying what's on ground .

Bros! Be wise when training your kids . And fulfil your fatherly role to them , and they will love you . Instead of competing with your wife on who will win the heart of the kids completely . It's uncalled for .

You're the one trying to compete with your husband when you should be working as one.

Your first responsibility as a married woman is to be a good wife to your husband, and by so doing, your children gets to learn the basics of ethical parenting. Your children will learn more from you by being a good wife to your husband. Allow them to learn from the way you relate with your husband.

Children are not dummies, they see everything, learn everything from your own relations with your husband so make that your priority.
That's the best way to teach your children.

Not going to engage you with debates on will and properties because that's not what I am here to do on earth. My first responsibility is to enjoy my life and be happy. I'm not going to live forever, so are my children, so let each sets his/her own purpose why they're on earth.

Only thing I owe my children is a good, intact and loving family. Whatever I leave behind when I'm gone would not be an issue because I don't intend donating sper. m in all six geopolitical zones of the country.

The most important thing you owe your kids are those intangible things they can get from you before you're gone. When you're gone, you're gone; they cease to be your children the moment you're gone, and whatever they choose to do with whatever you left behind is largely dependent on the kind of life you live while you're alive.

If you disrespect your husband in the name of securing your children's future with property, same children can decide to squander everything on mere boyfriends, and guess what? There's nothing you're going do about it. So be wise!

You're more concerned about being a good mother than being a good wife. Not a bad idea however ensure you don't ruin the life of an innocent man with your past. You can make a good mother without necessarily being in marriage, so know what you want and stick with it. When you go into marriage, making motherhood the only or most important goal, you ruin everything because your children are not dummies. You can't frustrate your husband and expect you children to love you because of materials.

Acidosis:


You're the one trying to compete with your husband when you should be working as one.

Your first responsibility as a married woman is to be a good wife to your husband, and by so doing, your children gets to learn the basics of ethical parenting. Your children will learn more from you by being a good wife to your husband. Allow them to learn from the way you relate with your husband.

Children are not dummies, they see everything, learn everything from your own relations with your husband so make that your priority.
That's the best way to teach your children.

Not going to engage you with debates on will and properties because that's not what I am here to do on earth. My first responsibility is to enjoy my life and be happy. I'm not going to live forever, so are my children, so let each sets his/her own purpose why they're on earth.

Only thing I owe my children is a good, intact and loving family. Whatever I leave behind when I'm gone would not be an issue because I don't intend donating sper. m in all six geopolitical zones of the country.

The most important thing you owe your kids are those intangible things they can get from you before you're gone. When you're gone, you're gone; they cease to be your children the moment you're gone, and whatever they choose to do with whatever you left behind is largely dependent on the kind of life you live while you're alive.

If you disrespect your husband in the name of securing your children's future with property, same children can decide to squander everything on mere boyfriends, and guess what? There's nothing you're going do about it. So be wise!

You're more concerned about being a good mother than being a good wife. Not a bad idea however ensure you don't ruin the life of an innocent man with your past. You can make a good mother without necessarily being in marriage, so know what you want and stick with it. When you go into marriage, making motherhood the only or most important goal, you ruin everything because your children are not dummies. You can't frustrate your husband and expect you children to love you because of materials.

I don't wish or plan to frustrate my husband and I don't plan to rub it on his face that have acquired properties . My duty as a dutiful wife and good mother still continues but if he's edgy or feeling awkward that I own properties? Well there is nothing I can do about it . he has to work on his inner self to accept what have laboured to build up for years .
My having properties will not make me disrespect him one bit but he has to remove eyes from my properties and let's focus on making the home happy. Its not hard .

victorian:


I don't wish or plan to frustrate my husband and I don't plan to rub it on his face that have acquired properties . My duty as a dutiful wife and good mother still continues bheut if he's edgy or feeling awkward that I own properties? Well there is nothing I can do about it . he has to work on his inner self to accept what have laboured to build up for years .
My having properties will not make me disrespect him one bit but has to remove eyes from my properties and let's focus on making the home happy. Its not hard .

To start with, you can't have a home with this mentality - "my property, his property".

What do you think makes a home a home? Home theatre and Sofa?

TheCar:


There is a saying that "A woman is tested when her husband has nothing and A Man is tested when he has or think he has EVERYTHING".

A wife buying a property in her name isn't a bad thing, if she "works" for her money, she is entitled to enjoy or have the leisure to enjoy the fruit of her labour.

If a woman doesn't misbehave when her husband has nothing, she would "probably" not misbehave when fortune is at their doorstep.

A woman buying a property in her name wouldn't make "her" misbehave to her husband if "the husband" respect himself and also "honour" his wife.

There are several families today in Nigeria that the wife is the breadwinner of the family and there was no quarrel.

What is important is know yourself and have understanding of your spouse.

Very matured and spot on esponse

Dejean:
Going through this thread will make one lose interest in marriage

A wise man once said "the most reasonable ladies are found offline"

You are losing interest in marraigae because women want to buy properties in their name with their money?..

..You are not serious,please lose the interest fast so that only males truely ready for marriage will go into it,not thieves.

Ziggylady:



You are losing interest in marraigae because women want to buy properties in their name with their money?..

..You are not serious,please lose the interest fast so that only males truely ready for marriage will go into it,not thieves.

why are u thinking like dis. u aint matured

Ziggylady:



You are losing interest in marraigae because women want to buy properties in their name with their money?..

..You are not serious,please lose the interest fast so that only males truely ready for marriage will go into it,not thieves.

I know you are incapable of thinking but always try

Now where in my writeup did I imply that female property ownership can make one lose interest in marriage

THINK.. That's what the human brain is meant for

Annwrites:


I am not married but if do I will not only get married to one who I love but one who loves me right back. One who will support me and be my partner.

He has to be one I can trust my life with. So telling him things won't be a problem.

But if he changes, I change too and take my leave. Life is too short to be living with an housemate.

Feminism is really not breaking homes. The homes which are getting broken where heading towards that direction from day one.

Marriages lasted during the days of our fathers because many women were contented with being slaves. Many of them changed their name into 'endurance' when they are getting married. It was normal then.

But today, it is abnormal to many women.

Men are heads naturally but no man is my head.

I am trying to wrap my head around this. It sounds a bit confusing.

You agree men are heads naturally & in same vain refuse any man to be your head.

I think that it may have been less confusing if you didn’t agree men are heads naturally.

stag:


I am trying to wrap my head around this. It sounds a bit confusing.

You agree men are heads naturally & in same vain refuse any man to be your head.

I think that it may have been less confusing if you didn’t agree men are heads naturally.

Not everyone's brain is big enough to understand what I wrote up there.

Annwrites:


Not everyone's brain is big enough to understand what I wrote up there.

Calm down. If I was sounded rude, I didn’t intend to.

Kindly help my small brain understand what you wrote up there.

Acidosis:



To start with, you can't have a home with this mentality - "my property, his property".

What do you think makes a home a home? Home theatre and Sofa?

In an insane marriage or home, yes! Yours" is different from" mine...

Ebowo:

In an insane marriage or home, yes! Yours" is different from" mine...

You have problems with your marriage?