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Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by Nobody: 10:10am On Mar 19, 2019 |
Oyindidi:Thanks for the kind words. |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by kristen12(f): 10:45am On Mar 19, 2019 |
I need a job. If I get a good job, a huge part of what is causing me to be depressed will be gone. |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by AceRoyal: 9:08am On Apr 15, 2019 |
SBL28: |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by Nobody: 9:16am On Apr 15, 2019 |
kristen12:Have u gotten the job? |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by kristen12(f): 11:48am On Apr 15, 2019 |
NwanyiAwkaetiti:No. You have an opening? |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by AloneTK: 12:40pm On Apr 17, 2019 |
SBL28: There's no perfect system or person. We all walk around covered in different apparel, so also does our burden differ. If you asked me, I'd say my biggest problem is "worry" while I'd take "Fear of the unknown" to be my greatest challenge. I wouldn't like to call it depression again as I've learnt to be positive about things now. But from what I went through, depressive moods should never be handled carelessly. It isn't just a result of LACK as we have many rich folks having their fair share of this nightmare. It is however unfortunate that the word "Depression" is being used by many, making it difficult to know who is truly depressed from who isn't. it becomes a commonly used word even at the sight of very little problem. I do try to keep my private life (including family details and photos) off the internet owing to my nature. I am a very private person. Being private has its good and bad sides but it could be disastrous for someone with that nature to get entangled in a web of depression as one of the major tips to fighting it is "To talk to someone", preferably a health practitioner, psychologist or a counsellor. What you've been through shouldn't be prayed for by anyone but I need you to understand that you still have a lot to be grateful for. Just look outside your window, at that tattered looking beggar who isn't sure of where and when the next meal would come, look within your family, that person who is ready to give all just to have the same educational qualification that you boast of, and try to look at some of those old schoolmates though gainfully employed but still struggling to have a child of their own. They all have their silent battles. Ultimately, we all find ourselves in the battlefield while we still have the breathe of life. I'm not a religious person, in fact I go to church once in a very long while but I do believe that nature deals with each one of us differently. Just look at your own area of strength, things that you should be grateful for and you'd see that you should be the one to manage your problem and not the problem managing you. Marriage crises isn't peculiar to you alone and we have a lot of single parents around but your decision should be tailored to one end alone-To be there for Your Kids because NO ONE WILL. The thought of Mine (Fear for the future) was the only thing that slowly pushed me into that world, and surprisingly, that was the same thing that encouraged me to hold on to life. Nature did help me through a friend here on NL, and as young as she is, her words helped me through my healing process. Not completely healed though, but healed enough to grab another chance at what the uncertainty of life may put on my plate. Talk to someone, Be Positive-Minded and Stay Strong. *Modified* Have you ever wondered why cases of CKD have been on the increase? Unchecked BP. Not all patients suffering from kidney diseases consume alcohol or take drugs excessively. Worry is part of it. Unfortunately, the publicity isn't enough to make people aware of this 1 Like |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by NoHoper: 1:25pm On Apr 17, 2019 |
Just totally incapable of saving because apparently my family (parents and siblings) believe they are my responsibility and I should more or less place them on a monthly salary. I'm 34, really wanna settle down but I do feel bad for any girl that would have the misfortune of being my spouse. So I stay away from them. My life is really fuuckked up, for no fault of mine |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by Nobody: 1:27pm On Apr 17, 2019 |
AloneTK: Thanks, I'm sleeping better now. I am focusing on my blessings. 1 Like |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by benjijosh(m): 6:19pm On Apr 17, 2019 |
I have read a lot on this thread and I feel so ungrateful for the things I have presently. It's not easy out there. I am in my finals and I still don't know why many of my colleague don't see past the current sch thing. In few months we will graduate.. Go for NYSC and get hit by the real life. I am always worried about life after school. I try not to think it but still I need to plan . what if I am unable to cope with the life after?. I am currently doing fine financial as I freelance and have a steady income but still that's does not define my happiness. I have no one to share my worries with. I am considering going into a relationship but I wonder be able to handle any girl for now cause am always working. In my lonely time I go out to drink just to pass time but I can't continue like this forever. I wanted a good life, I have half of it and now it all looks like happiness doesn't exist because of this loneliness and overthinking of the future. |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by Nobody: 10:23pm On Apr 17, 2019 |
I got dumbed by girls over and over again yet they claim I have in no way hurt them. Those things really weigh me down coz I have been nice and honest with them.... Its like gals don't really value honest guys.... But since I've decided not punish my self anymore because of any yeye gal....even if dy tell me dy don't have interest in d relationship I will just tell her bye-bye. Simple!!!! |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by Nobody: 10:30pm On Apr 17, 2019 |
benjijosh: Bro don't kill ya self with boredom. Don't be scared of going into relationship... Maka why? Imagine ya salf sayn u are scared of going into d market to buy cloth. U go see and test diff clothes until u find d one wey go fit u and suit ya pocket... Naso gals be... |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by Mist100: 10:31pm On Apr 17, 2019 |
Lukewarm: Marriage shouldn't be based on family and friend's opinions but your feelings. Humor, respect and friendship should be abundantly present if not you are taking a risk. its better you are a happy and searching single than a frustrated and depressed MRS stock by marital vows. The fun dude may not be the one. Just have fun. |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by benjijosh(m): 12:27am On Apr 18, 2019 |
FAWZ: I don't want to go down that lane. Can't life just be simple for once? |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by Nobody: 1:59am On Apr 18, 2019 |
benjijosh: Nothing good comes easy..... How do famers go about having good crops for harvest. They devote their time and energy then pray to GOD for good and favourable weather to help their crops grow well.... Life never gets easy for anyone. We go through challenges everyday just to make ourselves happy. Don't sit and relax for things to get better. |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by Meel: 7:26pm On Apr 22, 2019 |
benjijosh: My case is kinda of similar to yours. I transferred from a public uni to a private uni due to incessant strike. In the University we pay millions per session , my parent are kinda of middle class. We can afford the bills , but sometimes i feel we are wasting money. Worrying and overthinking has being my forte nowadays. Worrying about job to do after grad , how to make money , hope am not wasting my time studying. I worry too much, to the extent that it is affecting me psychologically. Anytime i come to nairaland and see people lament of there joblessness, i will have a sleepness night that day. Even though i now read books , listen to messages, that fear , and worrying is still there. I kinda of suspend all relationships for now. 2 Likes |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by Shila16: 9:35am On Apr 23, 2019 |
oyetpel:you are just like me I swear, eventually quit school for no reason now am 23yrs old still seeking admission.I just wrote jamb this year and hoping for the best.I just thank God for my life even though am not where I ought to be.I know God will make my crooked places straight 1 Like |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by Nobody: 11:34am On Apr 23, 2019 |
AloneTK: Thank you so much for sharing this thought. You've blown me away , so I don't know where to start... Let me start with the last paragraph(ur modified part)... I love Louise Haye (May SHE continue to rise in peace ) And she talks about this a lot! She said cancer could be linked to (holding a grudge- if you think of a tumour you could understand what she means-) So, that energy and pain that we refuse to let go could be breaking up the body. If Like attracts like and if what we think about creates negative energy, negative feelings, and ultimately negative actions... if like attracts like and everything pairs up well, then we are royally bleeped I wanted to add that depression and anxiety are only Symptoms, we need to find the core underlying beliefs, thoughts and feelings. I have experienced anxiety for 5 years now, and I have come terms with the fact that it isn't something like a virus or an infection, where you can take medication, and then after a number of months or more , you're back to normal. Mental health problems REQUIRE a change of lifestyle, and a change mind set. The word depression is another abused word like the word feminism, so if what you feel is long term, unlifting, and in a state of hopelessness, then take it as your body telling you that whatever you are/ever have been is wrong and it's not working. I lived a bit of a reckless life, so I can't blame my poor body, or deny it the feelings (I don't personalise things any more, I found the I in I am) All depression and anxiety mean to me now is an alarm system went off, and I have to give myself the things I promised, and dreamed, and was called for because my soul won't have it any other way. My body will break down and the mission will be aborted. We are not our bodies, this is our car, we are not our feelings, those are the guiding systems, and we are certainly not the Things we posses because they change. Find the self and work from there. *jumps of the soap -box* |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by Nobody: 11:40am On Apr 23, 2019 |
Loneliness |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by abimbola74(m): 1:18pm On Apr 23, 2019 |
Seems most of us are just lonely,putting on a fake smile to hide our pains. So sad �.Thought of this world to come to an end so fast keeps creeping in, Where have we gone wrong? All plans seems shattered ,hopes seems to fade away everyday. One thing is certain, what will be will surely be, we don't just know what life has gotten for us which makes us worry everyday. Life is just full of uncertainties,some are lucky enough to live life has they've planned it, while others keeps living on hope . Life itslf doesn't seems to be fair to some people. I believe this phase will surely pass. Hmmm,getting a job is hard cos u have to know somebody. Being self-employed is still frustrating as @tyms it's like u r being lazy about the whole thing despite putting in all u'v got. We go laugh las las looking back @ dis day 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by calebify1(m): 2:55pm On Apr 23, 2019 |
I don't seem to have bearing or direction. |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by Nobody: 3:01pm On Apr 23, 2019 |
yea my own problem is this my parents who i am currently staying with chose to make life a bit stressfull for me i am on the crossroad of either ending my life or going to start life all over again at a new place even as a conductor or as a nurtw staff i don't mind i want something that will take me as far as possible away from them i just want a life of my own,maybe i find life better and i want to leave the house tomorow and i will never come back again..amen. |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by AloneTK: 4:12pm On Apr 23, 2019 |
Guest007: You may be right. The two could be symptoms as both have grave consequences but I think Depression operates on a much higher level than Anxiety. Your analogy on ATTRACTION does make sense, one of the reason I suggested Positive Thinking as one of the steps to take. Finding the core underlying beliefs or cause(s) however, may provide a lasting solution but embarking on this journey Alone could end in futility in most of the cases. Oftentimes, not too interesting-life situations cause our shoulders to feel heavy and burdened like you know, and as such the temptation to give up sets in. If you will agree with me, ending up as such isn’t necessarily a result of the choices we made. Sometimes, what we need is not just someone to shoulder these burden for us but finding someone willing to walk with us all the way, someone who understands the pain and ready to share very soothing words. The result is an amazing feeling. This could ease the grief that has eaten deep into our souls. If “giving yourself the things that you promised and dreamed about …” was a result of your efforts ALONE, then I salute you as a lady. You are strong. And if indeed that is the case, you should know that NOT everyone is strong enough to do that without help. I quite agree with you that the resolution must first come from the individual with respect to a change of lifestyle. It may not be easy for everyone the way it was with you or with me. At a point, I got tired of trying to be strong. Battling with that resolution and the madness of life drained me. Our breaking points could be miles apart, but we all have that point. I pray for strength for those who have either gotten there or almost getting there. Opening up as a way out is still my position. A forum like this is sure to have touched a life. Your experience too could have inspired someone somewhere a reason to hold on. |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by AloneTK: 4:15pm On Apr 23, 2019 |
obingo25: Make a pause bro... Life isn't as easy as you think it is, though difficult sometimes. Time. Time is all you need. Careful planning and focus, then you can take the step. Just an advice, but you have the liberty to do as you wish 1 Like |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by Nobody: 4:35pm On Apr 23, 2019 |
AloneTK: I actually found my saving grace when mindfulness came into my world through this forum. Could you believe that I had never experienced being in the moment, in the present, and to think that there are people who actually live in the present moment daily, I had to sign up. It's all a journey and I have come to realise that the only solution is to go through it because there's no going around it. It wasn't easy on one level but then I live in a supportive environment, so I was able to access help. In some bouts I'd be indoors for years... I waited for the wave to come back around and every new year, I asked myself 'are we ready this year' and 1 out of 5 was the year I said 'Yes'. But I have to maintain this it has to be deliberate, and staying in the moment has helped me to do that. My point being it's not going to be easy but what other options do we have? We can't stay floating on the bottom, we could hit rock bottom and slowly learn to come back. There will be relapses but you are more equipped everytime. Use this time to learn something or work on whatever is bothering you and Google is your friend. I'm big on spirituality, not religion but if religion sets the lights of in your head then great. 2 Likes |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by Nobody: 4:40pm On Apr 23, 2019 |
calebify1: Ask yourself what do you want... and let it marinate, keep your eyes open and it will come to you. You could quieten the mind, and avoid distractions. Each day, ask yourself what do you want... or what does the world need... trust me the answers are out their and you only need to ask your self. The hardest part is finding out what you love, what could you see yourself excited about every morning. Once you know exactly what you want then all you have to do is keep an out and an ear up... 1 Like |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by AloneTK: 4:44pm On Apr 23, 2019 |
Guest007: PRACTICAL! Like I said earlier on this issue- You are an inspiration to many. Glad in a way that you did hint that it wasn't an easy feat. |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by calebify1(m): 4:49pm On Apr 23, 2019 |
Guest007:I quite appreciate your response. I am in my early twenties and finished from a course and decided to go after what I love, Pharmacy. I am currently studying pharmacy and enjoying it quite well. But there are times I wake up and feel something is so missing. I have tried dipping my hands in various ventures that has successfully failed. Maybe it is my outlook to things I don't know or maybe I am putting monetary value above many things. |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by oyetpel(m): 4:50pm On Apr 23, 2019 |
Shila16: Wow, we just have to keep pushing bro, i am now in 200L with a good gpa by 2020 i will be in 300L ... 2021 final year. I hope you gain admission soon. 1 Like |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by Nobody: 4:50pm On Apr 23, 2019 |
AloneTK: Anything worth having is hard so, why should life be any different. It's not a walk in the park but it's also not impossible, it's doable, and you come out a 2.0 version of you. I love this: Suffering erodes the ego, there is a reason for it. |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by AloneTK: 4:56pm On Apr 23, 2019 |
Guest007: Hmm...Come to think of it, you are right. Life is hard, yet desirable. I guess it (life) has no other desire except to fulfill itself. Good to have learnt a few things from you too. Thanks for your time on this |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by Jagaban880: 5:00pm On Apr 23, 2019 |
Re: Come Share Your Biggest Problem, Challenge Or Source Of Depression! by Nobody: 5:01pm On Apr 23, 2019 |
calebify1: I think that could be the answer... you forget it's your own race, if you wanted you could do absolutely fvck all. So, stay focused on the things that make you happy and everything else will follow. Stay focused because you committed to something and as long as that thing, in your case your studies, is okay, then nothing else matters. Sometimes, if we have a subconscious belief that we are not worthy then we act up and it's just a form of self sabotage. Acknowledge and comfort yourself and it will pass. Just check in with yourself daily, be it at the beginning of the day or at the end of the day. *Know thyself* |
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