I have a main account but I decided to create this one to post this in order to avoid embarrassment or reveal my identity.

I got married 4 years ago to my husband. He was in his 40s and I was in my 20s. The age difference between us has never really been a problem as we are both educated, well spoken, have similar personalities and share a lot of interests, and as a result we mesh well. My husband is a very caring and thoughtful man. This is one of the traits that made me fall helplessly for him, along with his intelligence and fun personality. I will not reveal anything pertaining to kids as this might punch a hole in my wall of anonymity.

I've always loved my husband and I still do. But I've never really been sexually attracted to him. This is not to say that I find him unattractive. No. He is okay as far as physical appearance goes, but his look has never been the kind to turn me on sexually. To put it plainly, I find that I'm only sexually attracted to young men around my age with tall, athletic bodies and with the energy and agility to please a woman satisfyingly in the bedroom. I met this kind of man in my work place and after we talked a few times I couldn't help but become attracted to him. I realized he was also attracted me, and fast forward to a week ago, we had sex in a hotel room.

I'm ashamed to admit that sex with him was glorious, but it truly was. It was better than anything I had ever done with my husband. I loved how he tossed me around the bed and did stuff to me that my husband doesn't do and I liked how ever part of his body felt firm and strong. After the act I felt a wave of shame wash over me. I recognized that I had committed an atrocity and I knew I had broken my marriage vows. The guilt of what I had done followed me around like a stench. I hated myself for betraying a man that had always loved and cared for me.

The problem I now face is that despite the guilt and the shame I constantly feel, I still yearn to experience another period of sexual bliss with my colleague. I can't help it. I'm torn. I already told my colleague that that one time was the last but deep down I don't want it to be. I know that if I tell my husband about what I did, that it would mark the end of my relationship with my colleague, but I don't know exactly how my husband would receive this information. I don't want him to look at me and see a betrayer of trust; a woman lacking integrity and virtue. No. I even thought of resigning from my job or requesting a transfer so as not to be in close proximity with my colleague but I know that wouldn't solve anything as I still have his social media info and occasionally stalk him(yes I do). I'm so conflicted. I don't know what to do.

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Getting more reasons why I won't marry

If you knew your conscience will hunt you like you described why cheat on your hubby? You should have analyse the long term effect of your actions instead of the 10minutes of pleasure.

Anyways, forgive yourself and turn a new leaf. Love you husband unconditionally and advice him to visit the gym occasionally
Cheers.

Madam, you should not be flaunting your problems on social media ; you will get the worst kind of advise on earth . And secondly , you need prayers ...lots of prayers , because adultery is something that is capable of destroying not just your home , but your peace of mind. My advice : seek your spiritual leader ; he will know how to handle this from a Godly perspective.

You have to be honest with WHO YOU ARE... Aka a betrayer of trust, a woman lacking virtue and integrity. And the earliest you accept that, the better it will be for BOTH of you. Why waste time pretending to be who you are not, pretending to live a life that ain't you. What you need is right there at work....so the choice is yours: be miserable for the rest of your life OR be honest and free yourself from this charade you call marriage.

I won't even dwell on how I would feel if I was that man and getting to find out the above by myself...

Why don't you encourage your hubby to enroll for gym classes.

You didn't find him sexually attractive and you still went ahead to get married to him.

sleeping with another guy outside your marriage doesn't worth it at all. Highest fifteen mins pleasure and the rest days you live to regret it.

You have to take a bold stand to let go of the other guy outside how sure are you sef that you are the only one he is sleeping with.
with all the kind of disease flying around town

It may be sweet now but i can assure you that you are on a highway to destruction if you dont discipline yourself. Besides you are already under a curse.

Why put your hubby in this position? Get a divorce and have your sexual bliss with the man you desire.

Your caring and loving hubby does not deserve the rubbish you have done to him and plan to do to him.

Shelumiel:
Madam, you should not be flaunting your problems on social media ; you will get the worst kind of advise on earth . And secondly , you need prayers ...lots of prayers , because adultery is something that is capable of destroying not just your home , but your peace of mind. My advice : seek your spiritual leader ; he will know how to handle this from a Godly perspective.

A problem shared is half solved.
I don't see anything wrong in her coming here seeking for advice.

Nigerians are too religious sha they feel prayer is the only solution to everything.

So if she prays without killing the root cause which is lust she will be free

Well this is precisely the kind of thing many honest adulterous men experience because even though they love their wives, they crave sex with different women.

Wrong in every sense of it but since a woman is involved this time, it should give the female folk an idea of the mindset of an honest adulterous man. They're all dishonest anyway.

virgoquin:

A problem shared is half solved.
I don't see anything wrong in her coming here seeking for advice.

Nigerians are too religious sha they feel prayer is the only solution to everything.

So if she prays without killing the root cause which is lust she will be free

Madam, when you share a problem of this nature on social media , you are sharing your problem with three kinds of people: the good , the bad and the perverted . The lady in question needs Godly advise and there is one good place where you see plenty of that : in the church or the bible , not online

OP,

Thanks for sharing your problems here. You are human at most. However, the problem is that, you are hooked on that sex like opium. Two things will happen; its either you tell your husband or you tell a close friend who will ensure this ends. Trust me it will not end with a transfer, it will not end with blocking him. The problem is, if your husband gets to find out, your life will be messed up, your kids life will be messed up. Your parents will never respect you again.

Its better to hit a night stand with a stranger (if the thing dey hold you badly) than to be in a relationship with a colleugue.

I saw this happen to a couple, whose wife was hooked up to her EX. The discovery shattered that home for good. The woman lost her job, husband lost his job. Kids had to withdraw from the high brow school. Once those kids discover why their lives became messed up they will never , ever forgive you.

Forget about that guy and face your husband. You will be amazed that your husband can even toss your body upandown but he feels you are too holy for that sh*t. Madam, just talk tour husband. Adultery never ends well. You might even get pregnant,

If it is SEX you crave for......divorce your husband and look for a stud who will sex your brains out


If its LOVE...... Then focus on your husband and teach, speak, encourage him to be a better man in bed and enjoy your marriage


Because at the end of the day.....sex doesn't sustain marriage for long where their isn't love

sex cheaper than indomie noddles

Sweetest taboo

Do not beat yourself life happens . so just forgive yourself that is first step to recovery, forgive yourself ,yes you did something wrong it is unacceptable anywhere ,anytime any place, but life happens the question is the way forward stop judging yourself and have a decent conversation with your husband .you can lighten up your bedroom, he's just in his forties , he's not 70 . I believe he still have an erection so you can work hard and get that Dream man that you've always wanted and fantasized about . then for your colleague just look into his eyes and tell him it's over, tell him you're a married woman you have children and you respect the institution of marriage tell him all that and he will leave you . so let's just say this is a mistake, it is when you repeat it again that it will become a habit so don't beat yourself about it and I must commend your honesty we are human and sometimes we feel that way, you will feel like sleeping with another person that is not a spouse its natural anyone that will condemn your action is just lying I'm being hypocritical. so please you are just being human but don't let your flesh rule you because you are going to lead yourself to your own destruction ,be strong everything will be ok. one more thing please if you know the kind of husband you're being married to and you know that it's going to change everything by telling him that you slept with another person please don't tell him .just remember, don't do it again ,don't let the flesh possession thank you

I should just send this to someone I know! A huge age difference eventually turns out to be a big deal once a woman attains the level the older guy could afford her. In the next 12yrs,Regina Daniels would be a lovely 31yrs old rich hot chick while her husband would be an old man who wouldn't be able to please her at 71yrs! Anything above 5yrs is plentiful fa.
That's why you missed the young body.

As for your husband, he will find out soon enough and divorce you. You kuku do not find him sexually attractive before and what's the use of a marriage without sexual attraction? Good luck.

Dear Marbella003,

I don't advice cheats, infact, I hate cheats whether a Man or Woman.... You did not advice yourself when your pussy was itching you.

Now you seek our advice after cheating on a good man. And you still feel like offering your pussy to the guy as a useless sex slave.

What a promiscuous Dog.


Get Lost. Filthy animal.

What made u settle for someone with so much age difference when u know quite Alright that your sexual urge lies on a hot grizzled male adult. Maybe u were trying to eat your cake and have if.

Thank God u admitted that u still look forward to repeating the se.x with your colleague which has totally defeated the rationale behind this post.

My advice: seek for a very remorseful divorce for the sake of your husband's good behavior towards u. Funny thing is that the so called colleague will kick your asss should u plan to have him for yourself... This scenario reminds me of the movie: confession of a marriage counsellor.

Marbella003:
I have a main account but I decided to create this one to post this in order to avoid embarrassment or reveal my identity.

I got married 4 years ago to my husband. He was in his 40s and I was in my 20s. The age difference between us has never really been a problem as we are both educated, well spoken, have similar personalities and share a lot of interests, and as a result we mesh well. My husband is a very caring and thoughtful man. This is one of the traits that made me fall helplessly for him, along with his intelligence and fun personality. I will not reveal anything pertaining to kids as this might punch a hole in my wall of anonymity.

I've always loved my husband and I still do. But I've never really been sexually attracted to him. This is not to say that I find him unattractive. No. He is okay as far as physical appearance goes, but his look has never been the kind to turn me on sexually. To put it plainly, I find that I'm only sexually attracted to young men around my age with tall, athletic bodies and with the energy and agility to please a woman satisfyingly in the bedroom. I met this kind of man in my work place and after we talked a few times I couldn't help but become attracted to him. I realized he was also attracted me, and fast forward to a week ago, we had sex in a hotel room.

I'm ashamed to admit that sex with him was glorious, but it truly was. It was better than anything I had ever done with my husband. I loved how he tossed me around the bed and did stuff to me that my husband doesn't do and I liked how ever part of his body felt firm and strong. After the act I felt a wave of shame wash over me. I recognized that I had committed an atrocity and I knew I had broken my marriage vows. The guilt of what I had done followed me around like a stench. I hated myself for betraying a man that had always loved and cared for me.

The problem I now face is that despite the guilt and the shame I constantly feel, I still yearn to experience another period of sexual bliss with my colleague. I can't help it. I'm torn. I already told my colleague that that one time was the last but deep down I don't want it to be. I know that if I tell my husband about what I did, that it would mark the end of my relationship with my colleague, but I don't know exactly how my husband would receive this information. I don't want him to look at me and see a betrayer of trust; a woman lacking integrity and virtue. No. I even thought of resigning from my job or requesting a transfer so as not to be in close proximity with my colleague but I know that wouldn't solve anything as I still have his social media info and occasionally stalk him(yes I do). I'm so conflicted. I don't know what to do.

This is happening A LOT!!

Caring, loving man but wife is still unfaithful for purely sexual reasons! Women love pleasure probably more than men, FACT!!

Truth is, even the best, most caring husbands today must still find a way to do DNA test on their kids!!

Evtspez:
Getting more reasons why I won't marry

If you knew your conscience will hunt you like you described why cheat on your hubby? You should have analyse the long term effect of your actions instead of the 10minutes of pleasure.

Anyways, forgive yourself and turn a new leaf. Love you husband unconditionally and advice him to visit the gym occasionally
Cheers.

It was more than 10 mins. It was glorious with lots of tossing about.

Men cannot handle cheating partners mentally like women do and that is just the truth. If you tell him now, the thought of you opening your legs to another man will constantly play in his head when he looks at you, which will eventually ruin your marriage. As a woman, if you cheat on your husband, you must take it to the grave otherwise you have yourself to blame.

To the sex part, encourage your hubby to look appealing for you. Work out together, eat well, mould him into the man that you want him to be physically. Tell him what you want him to do in bed. There’s only so much you can do, but for the sake of your vows and your home, good sex is really not worth it. You have to mentally train yourself to avoid temptation, that is the only way to stay faithful. And realistically most couples go through this at one point, so don’t beat yourself up too much. Dust your shoulders and do better and do not risk your family and your marriage for prick again. It is a temporary satisfaction and You will regret it.

MrBrownJay1:
You have to be honest with WHO YOU ARE... Aka a betrayer of trust, a woman lacking virtue and integrity. And the earliest you accept that, the better it will be for BOTH of you. Why waste time pretending to be who you are not, pretending to live a life that ain't you. What you need is right there at work....so the choice is yours: be miserable for the rest of your life OR be honest and free yourself from this charade you call marriage.

I won't even dwell on how I would feel if I was that man and getting to find out the above by myself...

She wants a taste of both worlds. She would eventually raise above the guilt and be unleashed.

Saffi:
Men cannot handle cheating partners mentally like women do and that is just the truth. If you tell him now, the thought of you opening your legs to another man will constantly play in his head when he looks you, which will eventually ruin your marriage. As a woman, if you cheat on your husband, you must take it to the grave otherwise you have yourself to blame.

To the sex part, encourage your hubby to look appealing to you. Work out together, eat well, mould him into the man that you want him to be physically. Tell him what you want him to do in bed. There’s only so much you can do, but for the sake of your vows and your home, good sex is really not worth it. You have to mentally train yourself to avoid temptation, that is the only way to stay faithful. And realistically most couples go through this at one point, so don’t beat yourself up too much. Dust your shoulders and do better and do not risk your family and your marriage for prick again. You will regret it.

Not true. Some men can raise above those thoughts and love their women unconditionally. Check some of the long lasting marriages and be surprised.

Well I believe that most men can’t. So it’s better to not take that risk.

Chubhie:

Not true. Some men can raise above those thoughts and love their women unconditionally. Check some of the long lasting marriages and be surprised.

U offered ur pussi to another man to fuk

Just kill urself for being an ideot

You can't have it both ways, Prioritize sis, What is more important, Mind blowing sex or a loving husband who provide security and all. Be sincere with yourself. Note, this your new stud will eventually get tired of you, soon enough.


oh, one more thing, never EVER tell anyone about this, especially your husband, else kiss your marriage and peace of mind goodbye, Except u divorcing him for the "stallion"

mrjojo:
You can't have it both ways, Prioritize sis, What is more important, Mind blowing sex or a loving husband who provide security and all. Be sincere with yourself. Note, this your new stud will eventually get tired of you, soon enough.


oh, one more thing, never EVER tell anyone about this, especially your husband, else kiss your marriage and peace of mind goodbye, Except u divorcing him for the "stallion"

The deed is already done though, or do you think that forgetting about this lover and pretending she is a good woman, will Change anything?
Would you forgive such "error" knowing that this other dude sexually possessed and devoured your wife in ways you could never attain?! Made her feel whole (sexually), and then you now have to mount this woman, who will always be UNSATISFIED/LACKING in the bedroom with you?!

MrBrownJay1:


The deed is already done though, or do you think that forgetting about this lover and pretending she is a good woman, will Change anything?
Would you forgive such "error" knowing that this other dude sexually possessed and devoured your wife in ways you could never attain?! Made her feel whole (sexually), and then you now have to mount this woman, who will always be UNSATISFIED/LACKING in the bedroom with you?!

now you know how women feel when the table turns.

By the way, madam forgive yourself and move on. Focus on your marriage and avoid your colleague , whichever way possible.

zeb04:
now you know how women feel when the table turns.

That's why I will always preach on NEVER forgiving a cheating partner (whether male/female), and to automatically divorcing the unfaithful rat.

I'm ashamed to admit that sex with him was glorious, but it truly was

It is finished!!
End of thread!

GraGra247:
Well this is precisely the kind of thing many honest adulterous men experience because even though they love their wives, they crave sex with different women.

Wrong in every sense of it but since a woman is involved this time, it should give the female folk an idea of the mindset of an honest adulterous man. They're all dishonest anyway.

"an honest adulterous man" lol. The sort who comes home to say he's been fuqing out.