How una dey, this is just a little advice for you guys who are planning on getting married but have a low budget and whose papa no be dangote or adeleke but still want to be okay.

Let me share a little story about my wedding preps

I am an Ibo guy...fine small . I decided to marry a beautiful intelligent lady who hails from Eshan, Edo state, whom I have dated for over a year.

I sha went to buy ring (very cheap ring as guy no too hold that year) on the 31st of December 2017 from delphy metals in Shoprite surulere. Remaining balance in my account N6000. When I made that decision I was working where I was earning money wey dey enough for only transport and feeding.

We went to church for cross over service (we attend the same church). After the singing and dancing and all the devil die die prayers. Church ended and we were in 1st Jan 2019. I arranged with some of my guys and I knelt down and proposed. My babe start to cry (I dont know why girls do that).

Anyways fast forward to June wedding never dey even arrange. All of a sudden one call and God gave me a far better job. Na that time we come dey plan the intro for August.

Only for 2weeks to the intro an Aunt of mine called me tell me say Edo people na winsh full their side say she go one PROPHETESS wey tell am say I don even chop jazz wey dey make me won marry my babe. I shock

I say tell the prophetess that I have prayed and fasted for 21days (which I actually did) for God to scatter the marriage if he doesnt approve it. My aunty tell me all the examples of men wey jazz carry go. I say I don hear. I waka.

Funny thing about all this is that my babe's dad is a staunch christian, the family is deeper life and he was praying all the while. So I was wondering where the winsh won follow enter.

1 week to the intro, my uncle sef wey I never see since Adam and Eve chop apple also came to give his wise counsel wey I no ask am. I had to pray and fast more again. I come know say all this one na distraction from ekwensu.

Story short....I went ahead and did my intro smoothly.

Then came the traditional list and their wahala. The village winshes sent their list to us in Lagos. The list no plenty at all (thats why Edo girls and yoruba are more or less the best to marry in terms of trad rights). BUT they insisted that we must come to villa. I no gree o, I enter another round of prayer and fasting, plus my babe papa own....only for them to later say we can stay in Lagos, make we just send them party money. So we can do small trad gathering with a few relatives here in Lagos.

Na so from that August we had to squeeze and save. My babe was assisting with all the money she could, advice, giving me morale to make sure this wedding hold perfectly (thats what happens when u get better woman). And lo and behold we are married now since Dec 1st 2018 and it has been the most amazing thing that has happened to me.

My wedding was perfect (not expensive), just moderate and sweet as a matter of fact na only DJ f**k up for the wedding, go dey play me old music like Tony tetuila music ....except when I was entering the reception with my guys, I say make he play a certain song. See me dancing here >>>

https://www.facebook.com/Maxdosh/videos/10213508552617217/



So here are the Top 5 things I did to make sure the wedding was on point

1. No invitation to everybody: Till now some people are pissed at me because I did not invite them, others I intentionally invited a day to the wedding. Guys do not invite the whole world, invite people that make sense in your life, you owe no one an explanation. Invite family, few friends, church members. Dont go down the street and call Iya risika to attend your wedding when the only thing that concern you with her is the indomie you buy when you are back from work and nothing to eat at home.

2. Have a budget: I asked my babe to draft out cost for food for the wedding day...she calculated 500k. I said ok, Aunty see all I have is 150k for food, if e no reach, let people come and drink pure water and biscuit and go home. She first vex but then she thought about it and was like na true sef they no go chop come from house abi na the wedding they won chop xmas rice. And she squeezed everything into that budget and everybody enjoyed themselves because I did not invite crowd.
So guys ignore virtually everything your wife-to-be tells you she wants for the wedding. Wedding is where they feel they must slay and show everyone that they have arrived. O boy work within your budget. Especially if you be hustler like me. Na we gon gon be the final sayers. Kings of the seven kingdoms.

3. Don't place hope in anyone: Some people will tell you that you should not worry they will give one cow before the wedding day only for them to carry Panla fish and give super story. Some will disappear, some will lose their phone because of you, some their phone will spoil, you go call taya. So my guy don't place hope in anyone, dont tell yourself I have 50k for drinks but tell chukwudi to give us extra N100k drinks, I will settle him after the wedding because my uncle the one with bald head living in America said he will send me money for drinks. Bros dont do it.

4. Be stubborn ...small: When I had my wedding, my mom said she wants to bring village meeting women, that they need to come. I said NO I don't want crowd. She persisted, out of respect I agreed. I gave them IV and wine only for them to say that there is a special soup they must have that day. My mom came to tell me (by the way my old man is late so na only my mom dey), that they said they want one village soup like that I said I am not making any goddamn soup. My mom was trying to push and said that is the way its done, I told her to tell them that If they wont come and eat the rice and better chicken, plus the soups we have already prepared that everyone else is eating they can enter lagoon or hug transformer. I no gree and they didnt come because of stupid soup. That little stubbornness of mine saved me extra 30k to cook extra soup for people wey no even know what I look like.
Plus when when my Aunt and uncle told me how Edo people can fly and chop winsh, I stood my ground, if I listened to them, I no for dey enjoy wetin I dey enjoy now. So bro, stay stubborn, especially if you have prayed and you have your conviction at heart. Carry go.

5. Plan ahead, dont owe: Sometimes its impossible to owe after wedding but try your best not to. I tried so hard but I still owed but it was little (N9,500) compared to what I would have owed if I hadn't closed up some loopholes. But even that one sef na because the coconut head guy who printed our souvenir did not come and take his money and I thought it was money they dash me.
So, When you are spending for your wedding, showing people you have landed and that they should gbe body eh. Please remember that you and your wife will eat and live after the wedding.
Don't gbe body eh, gbe body the whole money in your account . OYO will be your name.
I proposed on the 1st of december because I wanted to plan my wedding the whole year. So I was buying things small small, throughout the year until the D-day. No need to rush, plan without owing a dime.

PLEASE NO VEX SAY I WRITE LONG EPISTLE, I AM JUST EXCITED TO SHARE MY WEDDING EXPERIENCE AND GIVE SOME ADVICE.
If you have any questions please leave it in the comment section and I will answer. By the way I am into film production and shoot mainly wedding videos, see what we do >>> shizimedia.com OSHE!!!

As we dey start life our hustle are as follows

MY WIFE IS A CATERER: Makes food for events like wedding and events. She also sells packaged foods

I AM A FILMMAKER: I shoot videos and take pictures for weddings and corporate events. Other things I do are build websites and do jobs related to print like souvenirs, paperbags, photobook etc.

SEE IMAGES OF OUR WORK BELOW

The list my inlaw gave me after we bargain is about 986,000. After I did estimated billing of all items. That amount will be given to my wife's family in form of money and items on the list which will cover only traditional marriage. Tell me how you go do?

Poorboy:
The list my inlaw gave me after we bargain is about 986,000. After I did estimated billing of all items. That amount will be given to my wife's family in form of money and items on the list which will cover only traditional marriage. Tell me how you go do?

O boy if you are bouyant enough please go ahead (apparently you are not judging from ur username), personally its my budget or the high way o. By the time I tell them sorry sir, I dont have that kind of money this is what I have, if you no gree kindly take your daughter. Even your woman will not agree. Stand your ground if you dont have enough.

Some people advice that you should give the lady belle and everybody will calm down, which works too but I don't really like that pattern.
I am sure this your woman is Ibo (one of the reasons I vowed not to marry ibo)

MisterKings:



O boy if you are bouyant enough please go ahead (apparently you are not judging from ur username), personally its my budget or the high way o. By the time I tell them sorry sir, I dont have that kind of money this is what I have, if you no gree kindly take your daughter. Even your woman will not agree. Stand your ground if you dont have enough.

Some people advice that you should give the lady belle and everybody will calm down, which works too but I don't really like that pattern.
I am sure this your woman is Ibo (one of the reasons I vowed not to marry ibo)

LoL quite noted

Hey bro! Thanks for the break down... Congrats and Happy Forever after.

JewelBukky:
Hey bro! Thanks for the break down... Congrats and Happy Forever after.

Thanks sister

pls did you have fears during the preparation and how did you handle them cos am melting. Plus I earn a bit more than my fiance for now. what and what do you advice I assist him with him aside the cash which may seem like am giving him money to marry me. I already have my siblings volunteering to assist me with some things. am confused. wedding is August.

teebee22:
pls did you have fears during the preparation and how did you handle them cos am melting. Plus I earn a bit more than my fiance for now. what and what do you advice I assist him with him aside the cash which may seem like am giving him money to marry me. I already have my siblings volunteering to assist me with some things. am confused. wedding is August.

I had fears, I had worries. But one thing that kept me standing gidigba is my faith in God.
I understand you are assisting him, but dont pay for everything in the name of assistance. For instance, my lady assisted me with things like her gown, my suit, small small things like that. That normally if I had the cash I would sort out. But we both made sure she didn't assist with the requirements for the marriage. Thats a NO NO. My manly ego will not let me do that plus she also knew it was wrong.

I focused mainly on the big things like the requirements for intro, trad, white wedding, court wahala, our appartment etc. But small small things like cloth to wear (which I no send because I was like I go wear wetin I get o. But women and their wahala, she insited I needed to get new suit, new shoe, new singlet and boxers sef, I taya) and many other things to make sure things are going smoothly.

Women are meant to HELP the men not do it all. So make sure you are open to help both from God and from people (family and friends). If you have a friend who has a hall that you can get for free, beg am and get that booked. If you have a sibbling with a car, book am down and u have a ride for the wedding day. If you have a relative who has money whine am to help you with hotel room for the wedding day. Also if you need caterer my wife is there to cook better meal within your budget and I am here to cover your event at a 50% discount (Just call me 08174223203 and visit my site shizimedia.com)

So basically, it might not be all about money, the one money can sort out no problem. Let your man, focus on the trad and wedding requirements especially the trad (thats the real marriage, the rest na party). So if you see he needs help then assist....But dont pay your own bride price o....if he's not ready make una wait small save. Its not a good record that a man borrowed money from his wife to marry her.

If you still need more info, I am at your service ma'am.

MisterKings:


I had fears, I had worries. But one thing that kept me standing gidigba is my faith in God.
I understand you are assisting him, but dont pay for everything in the name of assistance. For instance, my lady assisted me with things like her gown, my suit, small small things like that. That normally if I had the cash I would sort out. But we both made sure she didn't assist with the requirements for the marriage. Thats a NO NO. My manly ego will not let me do that plus she also knew it was wrong.

I focused mainly on the big things like the requirements for intro, trad, white wedding, court wahala, our appartment etc. But small small things like cloth to wear (which I no send because I was like I go wear wetin I get o. But women and their wahala, she insited I needed to get new suit, new shoe, new singlet and boxers sef, I taya) and many other things to make sure things are going smoothly.

Women are meant to HELP the men not do it all. So make sure you are open to help both from God and from people (family and friends). If you have a friend who has a hall that you can get for free, beg am and get that booked. If you have a sibbling with a car, book am down and u have a ride for the wedding day. If you have a relative who has money whine am to help you with hotel room for the wedding day. Also if you need caterer my wife is there to cook better meal within your budget and I am here to cover your event at a 50% discount (Just call me 08174223203 and visit my site shizimedia.com)

So basically, it might not be all about money, the one money can sort out no problem. Let your man, focus on the trad and wedding requirements especially the trad (thats the real marriage, the rest na party). So if you see he needs help then assist....But dont pay your own bride price o....if he's not ready make una wait small save. Its not a good record that a man borrowed money from his wife to marry her.

If you still need more info, I am at your service ma'am.

lol. thank alot. I already handled my gown plus some of my other stuff plus my kid sister is a makeup artist and elder sister a caterer. although I work in a brewery outlet and most of my drinks are from friends but I saw a beautiful shoe for him and I have been scared getting it for him aside my clothes, I felt it's bad. And then he is already handling the traditional and white wedding together with food for two day. I don't want to cross my boundaries getting him few of his things hence my questions. so then I can get that shoe for him right?

teebee22:
lol. thank alot. I already handled my gown plus some of my other stuff plus my kid sister is a makeup artist and elder sister a caterer. although I work in a brewery outlet and most of my drinks are from friends but I saw a beautiful shoe for him and I have been scared getting it for him aside my clothes, I felt it's bad. And then he is already handling the traditional and white wedding together with food for two day. I don't want to cross my boundaries getting him few of his things hence my questions. so then I can get that shoe for him right?

Yes of course why not, but ask him first o. We men were created in another department in heaven. God made women smarter than men (True fact) but still put ego inside us like we know it all. Ask him if its ok to get him this or that, I dont know your man, he might take offence and say how can you buy shoe for me.....a whole me, do you know who I am? or he might not.

So ask him and understand the kind of man he is before making your moves and don't rub anything on his face. No man likes that.
If you bought him tie dont say in front of people that you got him the tie he is wearing

Honey see the tie I bought you for 100k, you cannot even wear it properly, I dont know the kind of man you are sef, with your head like coconut chips.

That kind talk in public is likely to hurt his ego.

So communicate with him, if he is ok with it, go ahead and do all you can.

MisterKings:


Yes of course why not, but ask him first o. We men were created in another department in heaven. God made women smarter than men (True fact) but still put ego inside us like we know it all. Ask him if its ok to get him this or that, I dont know your man, he might take offence and say how can you buy shoe for me.....a whole me, do you know who I am? or he might not.

So ask him and understand the kind of man he is before making your moves and don't rub anything on his face. No man likes that.
If you bought him tie dont say in front of people that you got him the tie he is wearing

Honey see the tie I bought you for 100k, you cannot even wear it properly, I dont know the kind of man you are sef, with your head like coconut chips.

That kind talk in public is likely to hurt his ego.

So communicate with him, if he is ok with it, go ahead and do all you can.

Wow, I just chatted him and he was so happy that I want to assist him and he even love the shoe already. He even listed some other personal item I could assist him with (if I can) and am so glad. people always say it's demeaning assisting your man for your wedding. thanks a million. I just learnt a different lesson

teebee22:
Wow, I just chatted him and he was so happy that I want to assist him and he even love the shoe already. He even listed some other personal item I could assist him with (if I can) and am so glad. people always say it's demeaning assisting your man for your wedding. thanks a million. I just learnt a different lesson

Lovely, reminds of me of how I saw my wife when she offered to assist me. I was like wow....what a woman. I am sure he feels the same way.

P.S Make una book us for the wedding video o (unless u get person already), we go do better work for una.

MisterKings:


Lovely, reminds of me of how I saw my wife when she offered to assist me. I was like wow....what a woman. I am sure he feels the same way.

P.S Make una book us for the wedding video o (unless u get person already), we go do better work for una.

thanks so much. plus he said he already paid part for a photo and video..... God bless you so much.

teebee22:
thanks so much. plus he said he already paid part for a photo and video..... God bless you so much.

No problem sis. I wish you the joy and blessings that come in marriage. Happy married life in advance

MisterKings:


No problem sis. I wish you the joy and blessings that come in marriage. Happy married life in advance

Amen. thanks

CHECK OUT this video by Xploit comedy that teaches us never to host a wedding party beyond your means and budget


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H7WsfpJndco